(A/N): I borrowed lyrics from the FFIX "You're Not Alone" cover song for the end of this story. Written (or should I say completed) for the Final Fantasy Kissing Battle 2014; two WIPs combined into one story and co-written with Sorrow Has A Human Heart. Also, expect some FFVII references.
Dedicated to owlmoose's prompts: "a predicament" and "caught off guard"
On A Good Day
{ a Yuna x Baralai one-shot }
"Make yourself at home, Lady Yuna."
"Thank you. I hope I'm not inconveniencing you..."
"Not at all," Baralai says, opening the door for her. Yuna walks into the vacant room she will be occupying for the next couple of weeks (she hopes it'll be for "only a couple of weeks," but there's no telling with Rikku and her lofty estimations of time), and blushes when he helps wheel in her single piece of luggage. His chivalry never ceases to tickle the butterflies in her stomach. "I am indebted to you in many ways. This is the least I can do. To be honest, I am a little excited. Grand my abode may be, it does feel quite lonely living by myself. It gladdens me to know I have company, however long you wish to stay."
Yuna stifles the giggle in vain, amused by how he tries to hide the excitement within the mature constraint of politeness when the subtle push to his step gives him away. Baralai almost reminds her of a child looking forward to the hour his playmate will arrive and sleepover. "I wasn't sure if you would approve of the idea. You don't look like you're the type of person to like co-ed living." She watches him place the square bag beside her temporary new bed. He turns around, allowing himself the rare luxury to laugh.
"Quite frankly, I learned to adjust during my time in the Crimson Squad when I had to share a tent with Paine. You can imagine my anxiety. I couldn't sleep at all for the first couple of days." Once he runs out of things to straighten out to keep his hands busy, Baralai stops to face her again and falls back into professional mode, but with a tinge of playfulness. "Out of curiosity, what gave rise to this... 'predicament' of ours, I guess you would say. It's highly unusual of you, since I know you're not overly fond of Bevelle and we're not exactly close."
Yuna entwines her hands, bashful. "Well, I thought you needed a friend. I mean, it must be tough trying to disband New Yevon. Even with Gippal and Nooj's help, I can tell you're struggling to convince the council..."
"Ah." The smile drops from his face altogether. He locks his arms at his back, forming an invisible wall. "Did Paine tell you?"
"Yes. She said that, um, Nooj thinks you're being used by the older members because you promised to stand by them. I know it's not in my place to say anything, but..."
"Excuse me for interrupting, but I would prefer not to accept your help, milady, because it will arouse a broad range of mixed reactions if it becomes known to the public High Summoner Yuna is involved. I simply request you avoid trifling with New Yevon politics."
"Oh. Um, I didn't plan on offering, but... I'm just concerned, that's all."
"I appreciate the thought. However, you fought to save Spira twice. Allow me to fight my own battles. I already have Gippal and Nooj by my side. I don't need anything else."
"That, too, but... I wasn't talking about New Yevon. Do you... feel alright?" His eyes frost over, comprehending the thinly veiled concern, and Yuna stammers for an apology – or an excuse, or both. "Sorry for being nosy. Paine mentioned you have trouble falling asleep–."
"I–." Baralai loses his voice, as if unable to find the words, the confidence to deny her concern – and the moment of weakness disappears beneath the return of his poker face. "I am doing better. You need not worry on my behalf. It flatters me you care, milady, but trust I can take care of myself. Payment for room and board is not necessary. Would you like my assistance to unpack?"
"No offense, milady," Baralai says, turning his back on the woman who sympathizes with him most. "I want to accomplish this on my own."
Yuna didn't expect for him to speak up then, daring to break the ice and confess such stern finality in his time of dire need, and she missteps before spilling her stack of clothes. She stares, uncertain of how to react, because she heard the coldness in his tone and saw the stiffness in his motions. Her eyes stray to a lonely banner of Yevon, resenting the mastermind behind his willpower.
"If you say so... But, Baralai, don't forget I am here."
Whenever Baralai returns from work, Yuna would always welcome him back with a smile. Most of the time, though, he won't come back until way late into the night; other days, she can tell his burdens are lighter the moment he returns in time for dinner. Regardless of any given day in the week, Baralai does not like talking about work outside of work. He would only disclose private events of the world if Yuna ever dared to ask; even then, she can only coax him to confide in her on a good day. It has been a couple of weeks now, like Rikku promised it would take, but the Gullwings haven't called in to pick her up yet.
Tired of waiting for things to happen, she found ways to fill her time... until she grew tired of exploring the city and mingling with the people (who are still rather bitter she 'sided' with the Youth League). It's no mystery why Yuna couldn't warm up to her hometown, either. Back in Besaid, you can see the stars and sleep in the peaceful quiet of the starry night; here in Bevelle, pollution shrouds the sky and the constant rush of machina vehicles echo throughout the entire city. The villagers in Besaid are friendlier and more laid-back, unlike those who choose to live in the city and are generally more busy and impatient. Even the difference in technology, the comfortable lack of it and the overwhelming excess of it, nauseates her with its juxtaposition. Yuna gets homesick all too easily and when the sorrow threatens to consume her, she decides to stay in Baralai's condominium, taking comfort in its somewhat stifling silence, the extravagant house of a lonely, busybody bachelor.
She lies down on the plush couch at some point, bored out of her mind. This feels familiar, the restlessness born out of too many days of stagnancy. After the defeat of Vegnagun, Yuna left the Gullwings and returned to live in Besaid. Babysitting Vidina became a part of her everyday life, but the more she played with him and cared for him, the more it ached to be around the newlywed couple and their little family. It made her want to start thinking about her own life, in five or ten years. Three months later and Yuna would receive a letter that would pull her back into the sphere-hunting life once again, if only briefly. Spending one week in the ruins of Yadonoki Tower with Rikku and Paine, climbing floor after floor of fiend-infested ruins, Yuna learned what it meant to reconnect with friends.
What Paine said after the first twenty floors helped enlighten Yuna of the events circulating around her new friends. Gippal still tinkers with machines, making a bigger name for himself. Nooj has managed to disband the Youth League not even one month after his homecoming. Baralai, though...
He wants to disband New Yevon, too, but his efforts alone to sway the council's old-fashioned thinking are not enough. His predicament proved too paramount for Nooj and Gippal to ignore, therefore they devoted their free time supporting Baralai in his daily endeavors. Because Yuna rarely ventures outside Besaid pass her wanderlust for sphere-hunting, she feels guilty for neglecting the problems of others, especially now that Baralai strives to put his past behind him but cannot rest until he convinces others to do so first. Will it ever end, the shadow of Yevon's influence?
On her way back to the Celsius on foot, Yuna resolved to pay Baralai a visit. Such a personal decision aroused Rikku's interest, however, resulting in an endless marathon of ribbing from both girls until they threw out the idea Yuna should be Baralai's roommate. It started out as a joke, until Paine became Rikku's accomplice and somehow convinced the Praetor that this kind of arrangement held more benefits than problems. Yuna didn't want to know what Paine whipped out of her sleeve to make him agree, let alone wish to know why she's so eager to push them together in the first place, but it must have been serious if her stubborn concerns and his stubborn denials were anything to go by.
Yuna dozed off at one point thinking about all this, lying around on his couch like a lazy cat until sleep claimed her. The distant sound of a door opening resounds in the background along with its quiet close, and Yuna stirs when she feels something soft and warm drape across her body. Curious, she shifts and opens her eyes to see Baralai knelt down beside her, about to let go of the blanket. He looks so tired, it hurts to see him smile.
"I'm sorry. I did not mean to wake you."
"That's okay. I was... napping." Yuna sits up to yawn, smoothing out her mussed hair as he stands to walk over to the dining table. Documents and beige folders are piled on top of the edge, and she frowns. "You never take your work back home with you..."
"I will have to now," he says, setting down the bag of groceries he bought on the kitchen countertop, and pulls out a bag of tomatoes and cucumbers. "I couldn't finish them all there today and they need to be signed by tomorrow morning. Plus, I didn't want to stay late in case you were waiting for me."
"Oh, no, you don't have to worry about me. I can find something to do..."
"You've been spending more time here now that Bevelle ceases to be an attraction for you."
Yuna blushes. 'Am I that obvious? I don't want him to think I have nothing to do.' Shaking herself out of these thoughts, Yuna stands up and heads over to the kitchen. Baralai always prepares salad before the meal and she wants to help this time with the simpler things. If he refuses her help in the outside world, at least she can support him at home. "Let me slice the vegetables. You can cook without having to worry about that."
"I appreciate that. Thank you. Please be careful not to cut yourself."
"I–!" Yuna snaps, annoyed. "I won't cut myself. If I can handle cutting fiends down, I can cut vegetables without a scratch."
Baralai stops in the middle of his task, bewildered. Unsure of what to make of this outburst, he phrases his next words with great care. "I did not mean for it to be offensive, milady. I'm simply saying to be careful. How one conducts themselves in battle is far different from how you would conduct yourself in the kitchen, after all."
"I know that. I didn't mean it like that, I meant..." Yuna trails off, self-conscious, and proceeds to let the matter drop by hiding behind her given task. Why did she have to make such a big deal over a stupid comment?
Silence, except for the simmering of hot water and the rhythmic chopping of meat and vegetables. Yuna sulks, feeling her face cool and the awkwardness stretch on for several moments before Baralai breaks the ice. "I think what I said angered you, because I treated you like a child." She exhales, releasing the breath she had been holding back. In mid-chop, she glances at the man beside her. Baralai still focuses on marinating the meat, face drawn in crisp concentration, but she knows he has the ability to multitask. "You are every inch a fighter, like Paine and I. When the worse has come to pass, such as the likes of Sin and Vegnagun... Of course I will never forget how strong you are, but sometimes I want to treat you like a woman. Does it bother you, then?"
He stops and sighs, shoulders sagging under the weight of his stress. How does he manage to put into words what she struggles to express? Never in her whole life did she imagine herself standing next to a grown man in this kind of domestic setting. Her whole life had been the pilgrimage, learning how to die; when she defeated Sin at the cost of his life, not hers, Yuna couldn't bear to imagine a future without him after she finally let go of the notion she shouldn't imagine any sort of future for herself. But now she has a future, in the form of a friend Yuna never imagined she'd have.
This person, despite his many shortcomings, makes her want to care so much about him it scares her. Why does Baralai cause these feelings to grow inside her when she doesn't want them to grow for anyone else? Yuna pouts a little, annoyed. 'It's all your fault, Rikku!'
"I think... you should relax. Go and take a shower. Unwind." She smiles at him, pulling him away from the knife and cutting board to push him out of the kitchen. "I will take care of dinner." Baralai complies with little resistance, confused, yet too tired to question this newfound assertiveness of hers.
"Are you sure? Can you cook?"
"Can you?" she says, tone tinged with mirth.
He hesitates. "Well, I am learning..."
"So am I, so let me learn."
"If you insist."
She moves to resume his place, contemplating when to add the vegetables after the beef to complete the stew. Baralai watches her for a moment, debating on whether to take her offer or persist with being the gracious host. Rubbing the back of his neck, he settles for taking the break anyway, but not before giving her one last look of profound longing, cherishing the beginnings of an inexplicable happiness in his worn heart. He will never tire of seeing this sight, and he will definitely miss it after she leaves. Whenever that will be, he chooses not to ponder.
Yuna senses his eyes on her until his eventual departure, denying the tension in the air as one of a sexual nature, because since when has she started wishing for something more in his presence?
Once they finish eating dinner together, relaxing to the ease of conversation, Baralai returns to the documents he brought with him to read. Yuna sits across from him, coping with the silence by sipping her tea and letting her mind wander. At some point her thoughts gravitate to what Baralai had mentioned earlier, about how the entrepreneur Rin provided an ostentatious amount of funding for a new project an Al Bhed child proposed. Because of Rikku's love for gossip, it sounds like old news; if anything, Yuna knows more about it than the Praetor himself, and wonders how much does really he know. On the day she and the girls solved the Mi'ihen Highroad crime incident, Yuna remembers the feeling of hope and excitement at Shinra's idea of utilizing an energy source that could light the cities up at night – but suddenly, it makes her stomach sink.
"Um, I have something to confess..."
Baralai lowers the cup, sifting through the papers for tomorrow. "...yes?"
"...Shinra told me, that the energy of the Farplane... might be useful somehow."
"Useful in what context?" Yuna sees his grip on the handle tighten a margin, sees through the illusion of his indifference when she notices how rigid his arm moves to lift the cup again for another sip.
"A-As energy for machina," she says, feeling her mouth dry all of a sudden. He waits for her to continue; when she doesn't, Baralai sighs, shifting in his seat to look at her.
"Lady Yuna. Please, don't be afraid to talk to me. I am your friend. If there is something you wish to say, please speak with confidence." Baralai initiates eye contact, eyes so sad and worn from the day and more, Yuna gulps. Her heart throbs, and yet she does not dare look away, not when sympathy and respect compels her to await what else he has to say. "Shinra is your friend. A fellow member of the Gullwings, unless I am incorrect."
Yuna nods. "He and Rin are, or were… I don't know anymore, but I think they're using old parts of Vegnagun to build something new. It's called a 'Mako Reactor.' If it works, so much could happen… Shinra said we can use the limitless energy from the Farplane to operate new machines, if we can build them to be able to do that. But, really? Limitless?" She breaks away from her daydream, doubting its assertion.
"Limitless in theory." Baralai sighs, tapping his finger on the ceramic cup. Slow and silent, belying his true temper. "The brightest scholar from Zanarkand's golden years... Maechen, was it...? Well, he recorded many of his theories on spheres and texts, which many have become lost to history. Yet from the few that scholars have managed to excavate and restore, one explored the idea of the Farplane expanding beyond that of our planet's core, or heart."
"You're right." Yuna takes a brief moment to recall the sphere she and her Guardians viewed at Seymour's manor a few years back. "The Farplane extends into the universe. It's everywhere, really. But more inside worlds, like Spira."
"Yes. The Farplane may very well travel as far as eternity. However, just like how we are mortal, so is this planet. Once the world has reached its time, I think this energy will migrate elsewhere. Perhaps to find another planet, if such a possibility exists."
"Then, the energy in the Farplane, we can't... it would be like using creatures' blood."
Baralai nods in agreement. "Precisely. I do not blame them for taking risks. How will we learn otherwise, if we do not question the capability of things? But I do not approve of this cold-hearted approach. Sacrifice our world's well-being for the sake of human knowledge? No. Spira still has much to teach us. I can only predict self-destructive results from this mad venture."
"And I cheered Shinra on." Yuna collapses back into her chair, struck pale by that horrifying realization. "Not even Sin did that."
Concern and disbelief dispels the initial reaction, livid that the High Summoner would condone such a thing, but Baralai exercises patience to try and understand why she felt compelled to support it. "Cheered? What? What do you mean?"
"I didn't know much at the time. It was just when he first told me. All I could think of were cities, all lit up, even at night. Like Zanarkand. I just... was reminiscing, I guess. But, I didn't know what it really meant. I didn't." Yuna flinches when he doesn't suppress his glare quick enough.
Baralai looks away, pretending to read words that spell complaints and transactions in need of attention for the next day. Clients trust him to create a compromise where everyone leaves the room happy. Friends and family are no different. The ice he has to tread seems so thin. "You had a Guardian who hailed from Zanarkand just like Lord Braska before you, right Lady Yuna?"
"Y-Yes. Or, rather, from a dream of Zanarkand... but, it was the dream of the Fayth, so when they faded, so did he. I... saw him, one last time, on the Farplane."
"Is that the story? I have always wondered..."
"Whether or not the rumors were true?" Yuna cuts him off, defensive.
"Ah. No." His chuckle sounds pleasant and infuriating at the same time, but it speaks so much of his apology, knowing he broached a sensitive, if not taboo subject. "In the company of fellow members, I have been told fond stories of a blonde youth always beside his lady Summoner."
"Oh. I see." Yuna nods, feeling more justified. "...Anyway, I didn't mean to encourage something so cruel. All I wanted was a small vision of Dream Zanarkand. But, not at so lofty a price. I'm sorry."
"Tis the human nature." Yuna watches him stand, setting papers and pens aside before rounding the table to reach her side. His hands are safe and unassuming at his back, and he equips his mysterious intentions with a polite smile meant to disarm her anxiety. "Will you humor me for a moment, milady?" When Baralai offers her a hand to stand, she stares, communicating doubt with her eyes. When he conveys unspoken reassurance in turn, she allows him to pull her onto her feet, growing nervous again when he doesn't let go of her hand.
"How does it go... maybe... it's something like this... Lady Yuna?"
"Er, yes?"
"Can you remind me of the most famous folk song in Besaid? The name?"
"...um, do you mean 'You're Not Alone'?"
"Should be. Does it go like this? ...'Won't you take my hand?'…" Baralai chuckles, self-conscious. "We accomplished that part." His proud smile embarrasses her and Yuna blushes, knowing full well the romantic premise behind the lyrics. "Let's see... 'Share with me your tears, all your troubles... and deepest fears'..." He tugs her hand, leading Yuna to the living room and urging her to follow his tentative cue. They face each other in a wandering circle and Yuna smiles despite herself, amused by his adorable efforts to sing and dance for the sake of raising her spirits. "'I remember when you chased all my shadows away'... Do you remember, Lady Yuna?"
She lowers her eyes, pensive. "Remember what?"
"When you saved me." Baralai stops all of a sudden, lowering their hands; when he squeezes the hand he holds, her eyes return to connect with his. Fondness warms his gaze, as well as her heart. "You have saved me twice, from Sin, from Shuyin... and now you are saving me again, from myself. You may not be involved in the decision-making process of disbanding New Yevon, and you may feel at times you hold no effect in my daily life, but... your presence here means the world to me. I want you to know that."
This confession of his, it catches her off guard. Water rises in her eyes without warning and Yuna ducks her head, touched by his sincerity. She hopes to hide the tears behind her bangs, but Baralai manages to notice anyway, because her shaking hand gives it away.
"Yuna? What's wrong?" He touches her shoulder, concerned. She shakes her head and lifts her chin, forcing the smile on her tear-streaked face.
"Nothing. It's just…" Yuna sniffs, wiping her cheeks. "Living with you, and… taking care of you sometimes… it made me so happy, because I never felt lonely. Being with you, I learned how much you mean to me. I don't know why, but… I like you so much and I… I-I really want to kiss you–." And Baralai silences her before she can complete that sentence. Yuna feels his lips first before his strong lean arms come around to pull her close, the familiar embrace so possessive she loses herself in its warmth. He prolongs the kiss, a kiss so romantic she appreciates the passion, because she never wants any reason to compare it to the cold, sweet touch of a fleeting dream.
The future has never felt so warm or full of promise.
