I need you to hurt me
I crave this abuse
for this I cannot lose
for if I stop and
look into your eyes
the torture is more bruising
more miserable
than my lies
I want you to hate me
so much
I negate
and lie
so much, so much
I cannot cry
no, not in front of you
you see my hesitation
I hate..?
your eyes enrapture
I'm in a hex
but my hate for you
is more complex
I'm in a haze
of hate and horror and longing
...longing?
I'm so sick
please just kill me
fast or slow
for this longing is too horrible for me to show
I know
this wouldn't work
I'm going to hell
my heaven, heaven
I scream at you
and curse and attack
your lithe flesh
your hit me back
I fall to the floor
with no regrets
except...
I slowly get up
my eyes aglow
I smile softly...
"There is something you should know..."
you just laugh so easily
and crack a grin
"What is it, dib-stink, tell me,"
I get up
and grab you
I whisper in your lekku
"Here's my secret, do not repeat, for this hatred is deceit..."
your eyes look puzzled and confused
and suddenly soft
as I kiss, kiss, kill you
you slam me against a wall
your eyes look intently
into me
"What is this, Dib-thing... you did to Zim!"
you demand, your cheeks so flushed
your eyes are angry but softly hushed
I just lay there, blood seeping from my wounds
"It is my doom..."
nothing more
you start to waver
I start to scream,
"Get away from me zim..!"
I didn't mean...
"If you don't.. I'll kill you...!"
you just smile and let me through
you touch me softly
and I retch
and collapse to the floor
"What a mess you are, dib.." you say... kneeling before me
before my eyes, I cannot see
I felt your lips bruise against me
"I hate you too, dib..."
and then you leave