Disclaimer: Is my name Disney? No. And I'm also not affiliated with any of the sources of the quotes at the beginning of each chapter. That should clear up any confusion and the need for disclaimers now and later, right?

Author's Note: So I got to thinking about the movie The Doom Generation, which I haven't seen in a really long time so I was pretty blurry on most of the plot. Then I got to thinking about what would happen if you replaced Amy, X, and Jordan with Annie, Clu, and Jack. Then my twisted imagination came up with this, which isn't quite what I started out with. It deviates pretty much entirely from the movie with the exception of a couple of basic settings (the mini-mart) or minor occurrences (people constantly mistaking Annie for someone else, the beheading-by-shotgun), since I forgot most of the plot and I don't write sex scenes. :)

Rating: R for language and stuff.

~~~~~

"This is not happening!"
--Scully, The X-Files

It was exactly 3:20am when the car roared into our driveway, stopping so fast the whole body lurched forward and lunged back again before the driver and passenger doors swung violently open. I was still awake at this hour, of course, and had been typing furiously when I heard the brakes whine. At this I paused and leaned over the computer desk to look out the window. The car had been abandoned by the time my eyes adjusted to the darkness outside, its doors still splayed open. I could hear a faint melody emanating from somewhere, too. I paused and contemplated the best course of action.

But this cognition process was interrupted by a loud repetitive banging on the front door, so hard the hinges protested. "Police!" a male voice yelled. I walked slowly to the stairs in the dark as the banging continued. Aunt Melinda met me in the hallway and told me quietly to stay put while she investigated, flipping the light switch on as she made her way downstairs cautiously. She opened the door just a little and said, "Yes?" Then she opened the door all the way with a little relieved giggle. "Just kidding! Hey, Fi's aunt!" Clu greeted her, hugging her fiercely as Annie pushed past them and right up the stairs at me. She grabbed me by the arm and dragged me into my room before I could object. I just stood there while she raided my closet, tossing things into a black bag she had carried inside. "Hi?" I said finally, testing the water.

"Hey," she replied, continuing to pack the bag. Then she zipped it up and issued what would be the first of many sharp commands: "Let's go."

I followed her downstairs more out of curiosity than anything else. Clu was explaining the situation to Aunt Melinda. "I just don't understand," she persisted. "Molly sent you here to pick up Fiona?"

"Yes ma'am," Clu smiled. "We're sorry that we got in so late, but, well, I was trying to drive carefully, you know."

"But why didn't she call me?"

"She probably just forgot. She's a little..."--here he made a "cuckoo" gesture with his hand--"...these days, you know. But I'm sure she meant to do it," he said sincerely.

"That just doesn't sound like--"

"We're ready," said Annie, grabbing my hand and leading me downstairs. "Sorry it's so late," she apologized and giggled. "Fi and I have tons of catching up to do! See you later!" She dragged me outside and I offered a feeble wave to Aunt Melinda, who tried to get out a goodbye before we were gone. Clu gave a little bow and a wave and followed us outside, closing the door behind him.

Annie's grip was more forceful than I remembered. She handed my bag to Clu and opened the passenger door and got into the backseat. Clu sort of pushed me into the passenger seat and closed the door, locking it with a goofy smile. I heard the trunk lid squeak open and felt the bag land on the floor of the trunk. He closed it gently and then climbed into the driver's seat and slammed the door. He started up the car too fast, so the engine made a loud screeching sound before acquiescing and backing out of the driveway. He shoved the gearshift into drive and sped off.

"Okay, I'm officially freaked out," I said. "What is going on, you guys?"

"Your mom sent us to come and pick you up," Clu explained.

"But she didn't call or anything."

"Well, like I said," he raised his eyebrows and shrugged. "It's really not that surprising. We're just following orders, man."

"It just seems strange that she didn't call."

"Stranger things have happened," said Jack from the backseat, and Annie, in the midst of applying a copious amount of eyeliner without a mirror, snickered. I looked back in surprise. Why hadn't he come inside? Why hadn't he said anything? Well, fine. I could be that way too. "Hey," I greeted him indifferently. He didn't respond, and instead began or resumed strumming the guitar strapped over his shoulder, playing the melody I'd heard from my room.

"I didn't know you could still play like that." I made a weak effort to draw him out.

He shrugged but didn't stop.

"Are you writing songs?"

"Sometimes he does," Annie answered for him.

I couldn't put my finger on what was going on, but this all seemed overly peculiar. "I didn't know you did that, either," I tried to smile at him.

"Yeah, well, there's a lot about me you don't know," he replied, mimicking my smile but with a hint of viciousness, if you can believe that.

"Is there something wrong?" I asked them all.

"No," said Clu, nicely. "We're just so happy to see you."

"How's college?" I turned my attention toward him now, trying to make it feel like a regular conversation between him and me.

But he was having none of that. He just glanced at me sideways and gave a little grin. I heard Annie snicker again, so I took a deep breath and turned all the way around this time. "So, what about you? Are you still writing songs?"

"No, I've been busy," she answered with fake sincerity, capping her eyeliner abruptly and looking over at Jack.

"Oh. That's too bad," I said.

The two of them laughed and I turned back to face the front. I heard him say: "Yeah, Annie, that is too bad. What happened, your spirit animal run away?"

"You are such an asshole."

I could picture the crooked grin he gave her and then I started hearing sounds I definitely did not want to be hearing. I flipped the radio on and turned the dial until it finally found a Spanish-language station, and then I leaned my head against the window, pretending to be asleep.