Renny: I see all kinds of different versions of this game floating around in fics, so I've decided to jump on the wagon for no good reason.
Green: I like how you say 'no good reason'. Oh wait, I don't like it.
Renny: You never like it. Oh, and this is just for the Kanto-Johto Dexholders only. Disclaimer!
Green: Renny doesn't own pokemon.
Renny: On with the show!
OOOOOO
"We're gonna play Never Have I Ever!" Blue announced.
Everyone stared at her.
" . . . Isn't that a drinking game?" Yellow eventually asked.
"How do you know that?" Crystal asked her. "Blue, have you been tainting Yellow again?"
"No." Blue said indignantly. " . . . Fine, maybe I have. Whatever. I've got the drinks, and we're all here anyway, so why not?"
"You're doing this for blackmail, aren't you." Green said.
"Why else would I do it?" Blue giggled.
"Sis . . . is this really a good idea?" Silver hesitantly asked.
"Probably not, no."
"This is an awesome idea and I wanna play. Now." Gold grinned.
"Suddenly I feel like going to bed." Red called, and stood up- only to have Blue forcefully push him back onto the sofa.
"Nope!" Blue exclaimed. "We're all gonna play and if anyone tries to get out of this . . . well, I have Ditty and Wiggly on standby. You've been warned."
"Right, okay, I'm playing." Red sighed.
"Does it count if I just don't participate?" Green wondered lazily.
"If you don't drink at least once, I'm calling cheat and you all know how I feel about cheating in games like these." Blue answered.
Gold shuddered.
"Yeah, no fucking kidding." he muttered.
"So, we're all playing then? Good. Here are your cups-" Blue handed everyone a cup, which she then proceeded to fill with alcohol. "-and here's your drink. If you run out, just fill your cup up again. No exceptions. If you even think you've done it, drink. If you're not sure, just say so and we'll decide for ourselves. Who's going first?"
"I'm surprised you're giving us the option." Crystal said suspiciously. "What're you planning?"
"Nothing." Blue sang.
"I'll go first!" Yellow announced. "Just to avoid everyone fighting over it . . . um . . . Never Have I Ever played cards with Gold."
"Pretty standard." Blue muttered.
She'd soon change that.
Gold took a drink, since he played by himself sometimes, as did Red and Green.
"Okay, I expected Red, but not you." Silver said, looking at Green. "What gives?"
"I was bored." Green shrugged. "And I won anyway."
"By a landslide." Gold scoffed sourly. "And since I was mentioned in this, I'll go next! Never Have I Ever had sex on a table."
"That escalated quickly." Blue grinned as she drank.
Red and Green drank in unison, carefully avoiding looking at each other, and Silver drank too.
So did Yellow.
"What." Blue said flatly, sitting bolt upright. "I didn't even know you had sex yet!"
"I . . . It was a couple of years ago." Yellow sighed.
"Definitely blackmail." Green said quietly, and Blue stuck her tongue out at him.
"I think maybe I'll go next, just to keep this somewhat clean." Crystal announced. "Never Have I Ever gone four days without sleep."
She drank, and Green did too- so did Blue and Silver.
"Okay, explain." Gold demanded. "Crys?"
"I technically have two jobs." Crystal explained. "Working at the Violet Orphanage is a day-job, and going around capturing pokemon for Professor Oak to research is basically a 'do it in your free-time' job."
"Masked Man." Blue and Silver answered. No one questioned them further.
"Gym plus stress plus nightmares." Green said in monotone. "Also Red's snoring."
"You snore, dude?" Gold grinned.
"Fuck off." Red grinned back. "You sounded like a drill when we were up Mount Silver."
"Yeah, I'll give you that one."
No one wanted to mention the stress or nightmares. That was private and if Green wanted to tell them, he would.
"Green insulted me, so I guess I'll go next." Red said, glancing at Green, who rolled his eyes. "Never Have I Ever been tied up during sex."
"You bastard!" Green, surprisingly enough, snapped.
"Drink." Red ordered with a smug smirk.
Green scowled, but he drank anyway. Silver did too, kicking Gold in the shin.
"Ow." Gold said in perfect deadpan.
"My turn." Silver said. "Never Have I Ever been dragged into one of Blue's schemes."
He drank, as did Yellow, Red and Green- obviously- and so did Gold.
Crystal looked kind of awkward.
"How did you manage to avoid me?" Blue cried. "I must fix this! Okay, tomorrow we're gonna go and prank some idiots who totally deserve it."
"Why me . . ." Crystal sighed.
"I'll do it next!" Blue exclaimed. "Never Have I Ever been kidnapped."
Silver stared at her.
" . . . I kinda wanna know if anyone else has been kidnapped, okay?" Blue muttered. "And I mean, like . . . traumatising kidnapping. If I'm gonna play pranks on you wet blankets, I need to know what could be triggers so I can avoid them."
"Surprisingly considerate of you." Green said, drinking.
Red shrugged and drank. Technically he had been kidnapped.
Blue and Silver drank as well.
"Okay, I heard about you with the ice thing." Gold said, pointing at Red. "And Blue and Silv are obvious. Why you, Green?"
"I'm Professor Oak's grandson." Green shrugged almost carelessly, but they all knew better by now. "I'm also a Gym Leader and a Dexholder. Technically, this makes me more of a target than anyone else in this room."
"Okay, fair point." Gold agreed.
"Green's turn now." Yellow said, because he hadn't had a go yet.
"Never Have I Ever stolen money." Green said, straight-faced.
Blue, puffing up her cheeks in mock-indignation, drank. Silver did too, not even bothering to take offense.
Gold drank as well.
"Dude." Red frowned. "The hell?"
"Gambling counts!" Gold snapped. "I think."
"He's right." Blue agreed.
"Oh, in that case I should drink too." Green mused, and did just that. He noticed everyone staring at him. "Gold's not the only gambler you know. How do you think I got Porygon2?"
"Point." Silver said, much to everyone else's agreement. "Shall I go again? Never Have I Ever-"
Blue leaned over and whispered something in his ear, with a glance at Red and Green. Silver smirked, which was never a good sign.
"Never Have I Ever had sex with a former or current Champion." Silver said.
"When this is over, I'm gonna kill you." Green casually told Blue. He drank.
No one else did.
" . . . Wait, you mean you and Green are-" Gold cut himself off, gaping at his mentor in shock.
Red nodded. Green wasn't looking at anyone.
"How. I demand details!" Gold snapped.
"Basically, we just got drunk one night." Red explained, laughing slightly. "Shit happened, and before I knew it . . . well, Green was-"
"They do not need to know this." Green interrupted.
"Was Green bottom?" Blue quickly asked, excited. "Did it hurt, Green? Was Red your first?"
"I thought this was Never Have I Ever, not Twenty Questions." Green muttered.
"Yes, Green was on bottom." Red answered instead, putting a hand over his now-revealed-lover's mouth. "And he's been bottom ever since, because there is no way in hell I'm gonna be bottom."
Blue squealed something about yaoi and grabbed Yellow's arm, bouncing up and down like a little girl. Yellow looked like she wanted to do the same but was only holding back because Green was glaring in their general direction.
"Oh, and I was his first." Red grinned. "Green was the poor little virgin, and I was experienced, so of course I made him scream."
"EEEEEE YAOI." Blue shouted.
Green shoved Red's hand off his mouth and looked like he was seriously considering throwing Red to Charizard.
"Right, this has gotten weird." Crystal said loudly. "Can we get back into safe territory? I'll go now. Never Have I Ever been attacked by a pokemon."
"Uh, can I just point out who we are?" Gold asked sarcastically, as everyone drank.
"I was just trying to save what little dignity Green has left." Crystal snapped back.
"Thank you." Green said, holding up his drink to her. Crystal nodded back.
"My turn my turn my turn!" Blue yelled. "Never Have I Ever considered sex with pokemon."
"Blue what the fuck!" Crystal shrieked.
No one else seemed to be able to react to that.
"What? It's a legitimate statement. Why isn't anyone drinking."
Slowly and reluctantly, Yellow drank. No one else did.
"I was dreaming." Yellow explained, looking slightly shifty.
"With what pokemon, exactly?" Green asked, looking horrified but curious despite himself.
" . . . Dody."
"Oooh you into double- or, well, triple-penetration?" Blue giggled. "Naughty girl."
Yellow hid her face and muttered something that sounded suspiciously like 'fuck off Blue'.
Blue just laughed.
"My go." Red said. He smirked at Green again, who growled at him. "Never Have I Ever . . . begged for sex."
Green drank and slammed his cup down, muttering something about a refill. Silver drank too, as did Gold.
"Well, I can see we're learning some stuff about Green tonight." Blue smirked, giving Green a refill. "You begged, Greenie?"
"He was being a dick and- . . . yes." Green sighed. "Do what you want with the information, I don't give a shit anymore. I'm not drunk enough for this."
"Well I'm not gonna scream it to the nearest newspaper I can find, if you think I'm that shallow." Blue scoffed.
"Oh really."
"Really." she confirmed.
Green didn't look entirely convinced.
"My turn." Yellow said, still red from her own previous drink. "Never Have I Ever watched cartoons after I turned fourteen."
This time, everyone drank. They all looked as shocked as each other.
"Anime counts, right?" Crystal asked.
"Why do you think I drank?" Blue shot back.
"Silv watches that Proteam Omega thing." Gold muttered. "And he makes me watch too."
"I see nothing wrong with watching My Little Pony." Green said, and no one dared call him childish- mainly because they'd all watched it at some point.
"I think everyone just likes animated programmes." Red said, and everyone else agreed with him.
"Okay, okay, my go again!" Gold called. "Never Have I Ever injured myself on a bike or skateboard."
"The amount of times I've fallen off my bike . . ." Red muttered. He drank.
Crystal did as well, because she could ride a bike and skateboard- the latter because of Gold bugging her so he could teach her.
"Hold the fuck up. Does it count if I only wobbled?" Gold wondered, frowning at his own drink. "Cus I never actually fell of, I was born with perfect balance."
"Lucky you." Green told him.
"If you actually got hurt, then yeah." Blue said. "If not . . . well, don't bother."
Gold nodded and put down his drink.
"I think I'll go." Green said. "Never Have I Ever forced someone into a dress."
Blue was the only one who drank to that.
"The only ones I haven't gotten yet are Red and Gold. Mark my words, I will get you both one day." she promised.
"Good luck with that, I sleep surrounded by bunch of pokemon who all act like guard dogs." Gold told her.
"Poli and Pika would kill you." Red informed her.
"One. Fucking. Day."
"My turn now." Silver said. "Never Have I Ever done roleplay for sex. Or anything else. But mostly sex."
"Who the fuck are you, Blue?" Gold demanded, drinking.
Green and Yellow drank too. Crystal hesitated before downing hers.
"Gold and Green I get," Blue said, ignoring the glares she got in return. "But Yellow and Crys? I need to hear this."
"It wasn't for sex." the two girls said in unison.
"I was at Comic Con." Yellow explained.
"Nothing else to wear." Crystal told everyone.
"Hey, didn't we go to Comic Con that one year?" Red wondered. "I didn't dress up though, I just went as myself."
"And no one believed you when you told them you were actually Red." Green smirked.
"You went as Marco fucking Bodt, that didn't even help at all." Red snapped.
"Don't diss Marco."
"Yeah, you'll never be half the man Marco was!" Gold cried.
Green hissed at him.
" . . . Dude, you're not a Meowth."
"Fucking dead Marco jokes . . ." Silver moaned.
"Of all the puns and jokes you could have come up with!" Crystal snapped, punching his arm.
Gold rubbed the sore spot and winced.
"I thought it was your kicks that hurt." he muttered.
Crystal made as if to stand up, and he backed up into Silver, yelping.
"I'm sorry I'll never make a dead Marco joke again!" Gold wailed.
"Good." Crystal and Green told him.
"Okayyy . . . my turn." Blue called, getting their attention. She narrowed her eyes. "Never Have I Ever . . . had sex while on the phone."
"That was one time!" Green and Red shouted.
"I was fucking listening!" Blue snapped back. "As much as I love yaoi and the chance to see it in real life, I really don't wanna hear Red fucking Green so hard that he can barely speak or even fucking stand!"
"Then why did you need confirmination that they were fucking?" Crystal wondered.
"I needed them to say it." Blue muttered. "And besides . . . I have that recorded. If anyone wants to hear Green getting his ass rammed, just ask and I'll send you the recording."
"Want!" Gold cried, holding up his hand excitedly.
"Why not." Silver shrugged.
"Can I?" Yellow begged, wide-eyed. "Please? It's yaoi!"
"Oh my fucking god, why!?" Green cried, hiding his face in his hands. Red patted his back sympathetically.
"You two haven't drank yet, btw." Blue informed them, getting out her phone.
Red and Green drank while the others all recieved the recording from Blue. She even sent it to Crystal, who looked horrified, and Red and Green just for the hell of it.
"You get to hear yourselves fucking, congrats." Blue said in perfect deadpan.
"Whyyyy . . ." Red groaned.
"Hey!" Gold called, getting everyone's attention. "I have an actual serious thing this time. Never Have I Ever been diagnosed with any kind of disorder or disability."
Silence.
Gold sighed. "Look, I wouldn't have asked if I didn't have to." he muttered. "It's just that my mom wants to throw a kind of . . . slumber party thing for you guys, as a thank you for being my friends and everything. She's kind of a stickler for details, and she wanted to know if any of you have any special needs or anything, just in case. I was gonna ask after this, but . . . well, this is the best way I could think of."
" . . . I honestly wasn't expecting that." Silver admitted.
Crystal glanced around at everyone and then drank quickly.
"OCD." she murmured, upon noticing everyone looking. "For . . . well, time, I guess. I need to get something done by a certain time, otherwise . . ."
"Right, that's it, I'm gonna ask Grandpa to give you a week or two off." Green promised.
"One of us can take over at the orphanage for a bit." Blue agreed.
"I don't mind doing that!" Yellow smiled.
"You don't need to-" Crystal began.
"We want to." Blue told her.
" . . . Anyone else?" Gold asked.
Yellow pursed her lips. "Do . . . do my Viridian Gift powers count?"
"Probably not, they're not a mental disorder or anything." Blue told her.
"Okay, nevermind then."
Blue and Silver both drank in unison.
"Birds're still a sore spot, I guess." Blue admitted. "And also . . . kleptomania."
"Same, but I'm fine with birds." Silver said.
Red didn't drink at all, but everyone was surprised when Green drank.
" . . . I . . ." Green trailed off. "It's . . . disorder and, well, disability . . ."
"It's okay if you don't wanna say it." Gold quickly told him.
"But your mom . . ."
"Do you want me to say it for you?" Red asked him gently. Green nodded, hiding his face. Red looked at the others. "Green's autistic."
"What." Blue said.
"H-how?" Crystal asked, shocked. "He shows no signs of it! Autistic people sometimes latch onto certain things, they're socially awkward beyond belief, and some of them can't respond properly to certain- . . . oh."
Red nodded. "He latched onto pokemon because he understood them, and people were a complete mystery to him. He's never been good at social situations, and . . ."
"Oh . . ." Blue said, as if just realising something. "He's slow to understand stuff sometimes. This . . . is this why?"
"Please." Green begged, looking up. "You never knew about this before, so please . . . don't treat me any differently. Please."
"We won't. It just explains some of your behaviour, that's all." Crystal reassured him.
"Is there anything else?" Gold asked, because he had to ask- Green himself had mentioned nightmares.
"I guess I'm kinda schizophrenic." Green murmured. "Because . . . because of Lavender town."
"What happened in Lavender town?" Crystal asked.
"He was possessed, for two weeks." Red explained. "I saved him, but the damage had already been done."
"I knew about this, at least." Blue sighed. "He had a breakdown once, some time after the League. That was when we found out about the schizophrenia, wasn't it?"
"It was also when we found out about the autism, too." Red said. "I went with him cus he's kinda weird around doctors. The doctor he saw noticed some other signs, and diagnosed him with autism as well, because he was showing all the signs of it. Only . . . Green begged me not to tell anyone about the autism except for Daisy and Professor Oak. He didn't really want anyone taking advantage of him because of this."
"I'd never do that!" Blue snapped, sucessfully figuring out exactly what Red meant. "I wouldn't use a mental disability against you!"
"I didn't know that at the time." Green mumbled, unable to look into her eyes. "I . . . I was scared, okay?"
" . . . Yeah, I have to admit, sis . . . you- you might have used it against him." Silver said reluctantly. "At that point you would have done, anyway. And while we're on about this . . . I'm also sort of epileptic."
Silver admitting that kind of drew the focus away from Green.
He smiled shakily at the younger Dexholder, who nodded back.
oooo
"I'll tell you what . . ." Green mumbled, a few hours later when he and Red had gone back home.
Red glanced over at him, shifting in the bed.
"I never expected them to be so calm about . . . this." Green gestured to himself.
Red smiled and wrapped his arms around his boyfriend, kissing him gently on the forehead.
"I told you." he murmured. "No one holds it against you, and they're all like me- we don't care if you're autistic, or schizophrenic, it only means that we can understand you more. They're still your friends."
" . . . And you?"
"I love you." Red simply told him. "Nothing will change that."
Green smiled slightly, cuddling up to him.
"And don't refer to yourself as 'this'." Red whispered. "It makes you sound like some sort of . . . burden, or something that people only tolerate. We all love you. I just happen to love you in a different way."
"You mean you love my ass." Green deadpanned.
"And once again, you manage to ruin the romantic atmosphere." Red sighed, but he was grinning. "That's my Green."
"And you're my Red." Green murmured back, leaning in to kiss him. "Yeah?"
"Yeah." Red said, and he kissed back.
They didn't get much sleep that night.
OOOOOO
Renny: Wonder if I should put up a warning for implied smut . . .
Green: But then this'd be the second time you did a Bait And Switch. Like with In The Cave.
Renny: Yeah, but at least I didn't scream PORN and then give the readers literally two sentences. This is just implied smut. Read and review!