Just a quick note, this was written last year (2015) on June 28 (maybe a little earlier when I started on it. Can't remember.). I've been planning on putting it out for the longest and now here it is. Also contains major OOC characters (as it's bound to be in majority of fanfiction). But yeah characters are doing things they normally wouldn't. Don't like it? Watch the show. Also contains characters cheating on each other, characters bashing other characters, M-rated content later, and a bunch of other nonsense. Thanks for reading. Feel free to leave a review.

Steven groaned as he sat up rubbing his forehead. What had just happened? The last thing he remembered was being with the gems in an ancient temple collecting a relic when some bug creature came out of nowhere wreaking havoc. When it saw them, it instantly went after them. He remembered Pearl telling him to be careful and to get out the way because it ate gems. Since he was half-gem, it was bound to go after him too. Because his fighting skills weren't as good theirs, he had no chose but to hide. Choosing the closest thing to hide in, he chose some sort of closet.

Just when he thought he was safe and out of the way, he suddenly felt something hit the "closet" causing him to bump into the wall. Suddenly the closet wasn't a closet at all. It looked like some sort of teleporter that looked like an elevator on the inside. The buttons on the wall turned different colors and the lights started getting brighter and brighter until he was flying at top speed while being surrounded by bright light.

Steven stood up and found himself on a beach...not too far from his house. 'How did I end up here?'

"Steeeeeveeeen!" he heard someone calling his name. It sounded like Pearl. "STEEEVEEEN!"

"I'm right here!" he quickly got up and ran towards the house. Sure enough, Pearl was in the doorway. "You got rid of that monster?"

"What are you talking about, Steven?" she asked him as she wiped the sand off his back. "We haven't fought any monsters today…or yesterday…or the day before that…or the day before that…hmm…now that think about it. We haven't fought anything in a while."

"What? We were just in the middle of fighting some kind of gem eating worm and…"

"Hold that thought, Steven." Pearl interrupted the little boy. "I think your breakfast is done cooling off."

"But…" Steven held up a finger, but Pearl was out of the room before he could finish his sentence. Suddenly Amethyst walked into the room on a cellphone, which was odd. Since when did she own a cellphone? She was giggling as she texted on it and sat down at the table too. "Hey, Amethyst."

"Teeheehee!" she giggled, clearly ignoring him. "Ooooh you're so bad, baby! Heehee!"

"Uh…hey, Amethyst!" he said a little louder. She continued to ignore him and keep texting on her phone. He tapped her shoulder.

"OMG, WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT PE…Oh it's just you…" Amethyst looked relieved, but then noticed the look on his face. "What?"

"Oooooh! You said a bad word!" Steven covered up his mouth in horror. He had learned from his dad about bad words. Under no condition were you to ever say bad words because you could either offend someone or hurt their feelings.

"Uh so?"

"You might hurt someone's feelings or offend someone!"

"Do you even know what 'fuck' means?"

"Uh…no…but…"

"So don't fucking worry about it then." Suddenly her cell phone was ringing. "Oh! My phone is ringing! Shut up, Steven!"

"Huh? I wasn't…" she pressed a hand over his mouth. "Heeeeeey, big daddy. Whatcha doin'? Oh? You don't say…heheh. Why don't you tell me how we're doing it?"

Steven stared at the white haired gem. Who was she talking to and why was she making those faces and blushing? He tried getting behind her to be nosy, thanks to some suspicion deep that he felt somehow. It kind of sounded like his dad, but deeper and in a western accent that you would hear in a cowboy movie.

"Could you wear that sexy little cowgirl outfit I gotcha?"

"Only if I can bring my whip and my strap-on…" she giggled.

'What the heck's a strap-on?' the half-gem wondered.

"Get the saddle and you can ride me all weekend long, Amy."

"I'll get it, but…"

"But what?"

"The rest of the gems and Steven…" she sighed. "What if some kind of dangerous creature or something shows up and I'm not here? Then Pearl's gonna bitch and moan…"

Steven struggled not to say something about her cursing.

"Oh come on, Amethyst." Steven's eyes grew bigger than life. That voice sounded like his dad now! "Don't tell me I got the break room of my garage all western themed and myself dressed up in this darn suit for nothing. For goodness sake, I actually went through the trouble of cancelling plans with my own son!"

"He'll get over it!" she rolled her eyes. "Look, I'm still coming over, but I'll get Steven to call me if anything comes up."

"Alright. I'll see you soon."

Amethyst hung up the phone and left. Steven noticed she left her cell phone and picked it up, checking the call ID. He nearly dropped it in both shock and horror. What the heck was she doing calling his dad?! Were they dating? Judging from the looks on her face, her tone, and the blush, she probably was. Steven wasn't entirely sure what to make of all this. It made him uncomfortable to be honest. This was weird. Was he in some kind of alternate universe or a dream? He had to go see Garnet. She'd tell him what was going on. If he couldn't find her, maybe he should take a look around to see what changed.