I really have no idea why I got in the car, I don't have any intention of fixing things with jordan, well.. like.. you know, he was like the first person I loved, or love... I don't know. why do I let myself get into these messes, I must be prone to them or something. why does he care, or even try, why did he have to get brian krakow to write me a letter, like.. com'on, krakow? why does this have to be so confusing. what did brian mean anyways, when he said that HE meant every word of it. he corrected himself, but still.. I don't even want to know about it.
"Angela?" Jordan said to me trying to get my attention.
"what.." I replied, I really did care what he had to say, expecially now.
"You know, that like.. what I did with Ryanne..like.. didn't mean anything.. right?" he asked me. why was he even talking about this!
"sure jordan." I mumbled and looked out the window. He pulled over to the side of the road.
"Angela?" He repeated again.
"WHAT?" I yelled, I was really angry at him, and I couldn't tell him why, I just.. like.. hold resentment for everything now. He leaned over to kiss me, so I pulled away. "You think like, everytime something goes wrong or something, you can just like.. do that.. well.. you can't. jordan.. I don't think we should be seeing eachother." Pulling at my seatbelt I undid it and lept out of the car as fast as I could. Luckily Jordan had just drove a couple blocks down the street, so I ran home.
Brian Krakow was still outside, this time pacing back and forth infront of his house. He looked so angry.. like he does.. when he gets angry. Sometimes it's sort of funny when he gets mad, but still, he doesn't deserve it. He looked up from his pacing and caught my eye, as soon as he fully realised that I was on my way toward my house he walked full speed toward me. "You know, I just don't ever get you, you're always so unpredictable.. yet so predictable."
"I know, I'm sorry.. I just... you don't understand Brian." I said uneasily, I really had no idea what I was saying, I just needed to escape him.
"I DON'T UNDERSTAND? How can you honestly think I like.. don't understand?" He shouted while we stood in the street. It seems he does a lot of yelling at me here.
"Brian, you just wouldn't know." I felt like, he would have no idea about anything I was going through. He started to speak again, but I interupted him. "What was that earlier, why did you say.. you meant everyword you said, and then correct yourself like.. like.. what was that?"
"nevermind, I didn't write it." he said and turned to face the opposite way.
"brian! don't lie, I know you did, we already figured this out, ricky told me, stop being like... so dumb.. and like thinking I'm totally clueless, cause I'm not you know. " I said so quickly I thought I might have said it all in one breath.
"well, just like... you know, it's just... " he stuttered.
"what brian, just say it!" I grew impatient.
"nothing, you're just so confusing, you confuse me, I'm just confused, well.. like.. I'm not.. it's just.. nevermind." he said as he walked back to his house.
"brian stop!" I yelled after him. "I want to know, what's your problem, why cant you just talk to me, KRAKOW!"
"no you don't, believe me chase." he said, then proceeded to shut his front door behind him. I don't know why, but like.. Brian Krakow had actually just confused me, he just made me stop and think. I just kept staring at his door, almost like I was asuming he would come back out and talk to me, but he didn't.
When I went to sleep that night, I like.. just layed there thinking about everying, you know, the letter, jordan.. brian, why does this all have to be so complicated, how come for once.. my life can't be like.. normal, or easy for once.