I feel so bad, I published this twice already and I'm doing it again because I had to fix something. My apologies to my previous reviewers! :(
I think all I have in me are one shots. I have some ideas for multi chapter pieces, and when I better structure them, I may make them happen. With that said, I wanted to explore the theme of loss and release. Also, I was not expecting the direction that I took this in so please bear with me. I used book and movie elements here and I decided to elaborate on the idea that Ron had made it snow in HBP and I wanted to explore that a bit. This is just some creativity at work so no getting nitpicky.
I own nothing of Harry Potter or the characters. On with it!
'You are ice and fire the touch of you burns my hands like snow.' - Amy Lowell (American critic, lecturer, and a leading poet of the Imagist school, 1874-1925)
'Teaspoon. Noun. 1. a small spoon used for stirring tea, eating certain desserts, etc. 2. (Cookery) Also called teaspoonful…the amount contained in such a spoon. 3. (Mathematics & Measurements / Units) a unit of capacity used in cooking, medicine, etc., equal to about one fluid dram. Source: Collins English Dictionary – Complete and Unabridged © HarperCollins Publishers 1991, 1994.' Quotes, definitions, passages, anecdotes, facts and figures…that was what Hermione Granger used to cope. She stole a glance at her two boys…correction, her two men. Harry Potter and Ron Weasley, her best friend and her boyfriend, respectively, sat by the fire in the Weasley's sitting room. It was sometime past 2 am. It was a Friday. The date was May 8th. The year, 1998.
'On this day in 1945, it was V-E Day, combat ended in Europe and German forces agreed in Rheims, France, to an unconditional surrender,' she thought to herself in an attempt to take her mind off of the huge task at hand. Harry jabbed the smoldering logs with the fireplace poker, his green eyes fixed on Ron's still form, how many logs had been fed to the fire, and the sitting room was still so cold.
'This day in 1450 was Jack Cade's Rebellion when Kentishmen revolted against King Henry VI,' her mind fired off yet another fact as her eyes locked with Harry's. They were thinking the same thing. 'We have to get Ron to bed.'
'In the United States, this is the earliest day on which Mother's Day can fall, while May 14 is the latest; celebrated on the second Sunday of May. The Muggles there buy flowers, candy, jewelry and other trinkets for their mothers.' Her thoughts drifted to Mrs. Weasley. What a terrible day to be a mother.
'Today in 1935, Princess Elisabeth of Denmark was born.' She had to shut the facts and figures off. She and Harry have to get Ron to bed. They themselves have to sleep. In a matter of hours they have to be up. They have to bury Fred today.
In the past, when it came to Ron, neither Harry, nor Hermione had ever been nervous. They both knew how to deal with him. He wasn't complex, but they both learned that when they were most direct with Ron, they got the best response, if not right away, then eventually. But this was different; this was something that neither of them was familiar with. Death was nothing to new to them but they had dealt with the pain as a whole…as a trio. They barely knew Cedric Diggory when he died; in truth his death was only notable because it was truly a first for the three of them. It was the first time that death had hit so close; a fellow student. They were shocked, they were scared, they were sad, but they moved on. Besides, there was so much happening, and it did them no good to dwell. Losing Sirius had hurt more. It hurt so much more. Yet, when put into perspective, they did not have the chance to really get to know Sirius. They knew him and they all loved him, but with his fierce urge to fight, when they thought of it, they knew in their hearts that they'd lose him, and in the end they were grateful to lose him before any of them grew to love him too deeply. Sirius Black was truly Harry's loss. Harry mourned mostly for the last connection to his parents being taken from him, than for the actual person. His heart ached for Sirius, but his heart also broke because the loneliness was all the more real, Harry had no family left after losing Sirius. Dumbledore's death was truly a loss that resonated with all three of them. Not only was he a great man, but he was their protector. They not only cried for him, but they cried because, for the first time, they felt completely exposed to Voldemort and his minions.
Somehow this was different. They had so many to mourn; Remus, Tonks, Dobby, Mad-Eye, Colin, even poor, loyal Hedwig, and so many countless others. Maybe it was because this loss was coupled with the fact that it was all over. It was completely over. But Harry and Hermione thought that this was different because the loss of Fred was more Ron's than theirs. It also occurred to them that they had never seen Ron truly in a state of mourning. He wasn't the most emotional person to begin with. When others were hurting he tried to lighten to mood, most times his efforts were rather boorish and inappropriate, but he tried to find a way to remedy the sadness. Hermione noticed how solemn she and Harry were when Ron was gone during the Horcrux hunt. He just lightened the mood naturally, affording them a brief escape from the massive tasks they faced. It wasn't all he did however, he was fierce and loyal, and even if his wand failed him at times, he wasn't above throwing a good punch. She and Harry mused at how quickly everything lightened when Ron had come back to them. If he wasn't trying to lighten matters, he normally shut himself off; he wore the shield of numb indifference in an effort to protect himself. Now he was here, his friendship with Harry repaired, his relationship with Hermione blossoming into something they both wanted, but his grief left him broken and silent. It was like he wasn't here at all. He stared at the fire, his impossibly blue eyes swimming with mournful memories, and his expression stony. Hermione wanted to steal him away and just run off, find someplace quiet, some place that was just for them, where she could hold him and comfort him. She wanted to be alone with him where she could say and do all of the things she had wanted to do for years now. It was inappropriate to want him physically at this time, but words were so lost now, and she wanted nothing more than to express every ounce of her love to him. He never pushed her away, not since the kiss they shared during the battle, but he seemed so hard to reach. Here they were, together, an official couple and he was too paralyzed with grief for the two of them. She felt terribly selfish, but she was a young woman! She wanted stolen moments! She wanted to sneak into his room, she wanted feverish kisses until their lips were bruised; she wanted late night explorations and whispered nothings. She just wanted him and now that she could have him, his heart was broken and she had no idea what to do. This was definitely a new Ron, that neither she nor Harry had met and they didn't know the first move to make.
When Hermione had finally gotten the nerve to say something to him, Ginny entered the sitting room. She was slightly pale; her eyes were moist with dark circles under them. She'd been upstairs with her mum comforting her while her dad puttered about in his shed. He needed a bit of time to compose himself before tending to his broken wife. Bill and Charlie were keeping vigil in the kitchen, listening for any sound that would come from George's room. George, poor George. He was shattered into unfathomable pieces. No one could think of a thing to say to him. He asked to be left alone until morning, a request that everyone complied with, but they watched his door and listened for anything unusual. The only sounds that came from the room throughout the night were his muffled sobs. Percy was also here, in the kitchen. He made tea or drinks for whoever needed it, in a small attempt to atone for the last few years. No one brought it up to him; the Weasley's just weren't that way. With the exception of Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, they called him a "foul git" when he was away, they pledged to never forgive him, but when he came back, the door and all of their arms were open. Percy was ambitious. He wasn't a bad person, he was just blinded by his powerful desire to make something great of himself. It was a simple sin, but with staggering repercussions. On the train ride home, he confided to Hermione that he wished it were him and not Fred lying stiff in a box, stacked with countless others in the rear of the train. She offered no response, she simply hugged him.
Ginny ruffled Harry's hair and he smiled sadly at her in response. She would be okay. Hermione marveled at their relationship. Their bond was very strong and there needed to be no words between them. Things weren't perfect, but they were, at the very least, nice between Ginny and Harry. She offered a small smile to Hermione and glanced over at Ron. Taking one look at him she left the room, only to return seconds later with Charlie in tow. They approached Ron with some caution. Charlie stood in front of him.
"You alright there, Ronnie." Ron's response was a slight nod. He crouched down in front of Ron and placed a firm hand on his shoulder. "You better get to bed. Can't go nodding off during…can't go nodding off, yeah?" Charlie would not mention the funeral by name, not yet anyway. Ron remained in stony silence. By now, Harry and Hermione were on their feet, they let Charlie and Ginny handle the matter of getting Ron to move to his bed. Ginny walked to the back of Ron, kneeled down and wrapped her arms around his shoulders, her chin fitting into the crook of his neck; she whispered something in his ear that no one else could hear. Clearly words that were meant only for him. He responded to her with a nod and slowly got to his feet while she held out her hand to him. Hand in hand, Ron and Ginny quietly ascended the stairs to his bedroom. Harry and Hermione bade the others goodnight and followed. Upon reaching Ron's room, Ginny shook her head at Harry and Hermione slightly, "give us a moment," she whispered and shut the door on them. They sat at the top of the stairs outside of Ron's room.
"I don't want to think about how this is going to be," Hermione whispered.
"Me neither. He's in bad shape now, how will he be tomorrow? I mean they're all a mess, but I've never seen Ron like this," Harry replied, glancing back at Ron's door, both he and Hermione curious about the hushed voices coming from the other side. "How are you two anyway? I mean, I know it hasn't been the most…ideal time, but you two…are you…okay?"
"Yes. We're fine. Well, I suppose…I imagine we…oh I don't know!" She answered chuckling lightly at his smirk. "It's not exactly like we've have ample snogging time in the last few days."
"I know, I know. I'm just teasing, Hermione. I just don't want to act like there's a funeral tomorrow." He said, sobering quickly. "I know it's terrible, but I just don't want to think about how bad it's going to be, because, Hermione, tomorrow is going to be bad. Really really really…really bad." He glanced back at the door. "I won't have Ginny tomorrow and you won't have Ron. I mean, that's a possibility. They just may want to be around each other."
"Then we'll lean on each other. Like we always have. We'll wait for them to come around. Like we always have. Yeah?"
"Yeah." He chuckled quietly again. "Even though, to be fair, you and Ron were too stubborn and I didn't even know Ginny was there."
"Well, Ron and I gave in and you finally noticed Ginny so shut it, Harry. Tomorrow it may be just you and me, so let's try and be strong for each other."
"Absolutely."
A few moments later, Ginny opened the door. She stepped out, her eyes were raw, cheeks red and streaked with shed tears. She gave Harry and Hermione a watery smile. "I'm going to go to bed."
Hermione side stepped Ginny, gave her shoulders a pat and went into the room to bid Ron goodnight. She shut the door behind her, giving the two of them, as well as Harry and Ginny some privacy. Ron was sitting on his bed, shoulders slumped, head bowed. His eyes were dry and he looked just about ready to explode.
"I came to say goodnight." He nodded. Hermione noticed his state and grew concerned over the fact that he hadn't cried since Fred died. Once he'd initially composed himself, his façade hadn't slipped. It wasn't that Hermione was expecting him to be a complete mess, but he had to do something. Holding this in was not healthy and she was scared for him. She rushed over to him and threw her arms around his neck. Taking in his clean scent and the warmth of his body, she noticed that the warmth seemed to evade his hands, nose and even his ears, she whispered to him, "you have to let go, Ron, you just have to."
"I can't," was all he managed. She pulled back and looked into his eyes, searching for a crack in his mask, anything. "Get some sleep. I'll see you soon."
"Alright. Goodnight then," she whispered kissing him softly. He attempted a smile and squeezed her hand. His hands were so cold. He was trying his best for her, but he didn't understand, Hermione didn't need him to try and compose himself, she needed him to let go. It was the only way he'd begin to heal.
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Hermione changed into her night clothes and settled into her bed across from Ginny's. Ginny had just finished brushing her hair and was preparing to lay down, herself.
"How are you?" Hermione asked Ginny softly.
"Not okay. Nowhere near it, but I'll get there. How're you?"
"Still somewhat in shock I think. I can't believe it. I can't believe he's gone. I can't believe so many of our friends are gone. That it's over. Voldemort, Bellatrix, they're all gone. Ron and I…I can't believe so much happened in the last few days."
"Yeah, you and Ron. Well, honestly that's the only thing I can believe. S'about time, you know."
"Well, I pledge to make up for lost time as soon as I can. If he'll let me." She sat up and looked squarely at Ginny. "I don't know what to do. I've never seen him like this. He only cried about a week ago and since then…it's been nothing. And his hands, his nose, he's been so cold. Literally, he's just been cold. Is this normal?"
"Hermione, for the last few years, I thought you and Harry knew Ron better than I do. But he's been like this before. When we were younger. He was eight I think, we had a friend who lived not too far from here, closer to the village, his name was Alfie and he'd gotten sick and died. Some bad flu or something. Ron liked him a lot and when Mum told us that he had died, Ron just shut off, like now. Funny thing though, Ron's magic was still coming out and every room he was in would get really cold when he was really upset. You look at Ron and you'd expect fire, but when we were kids, he made ice. So odd."
Now that Hermione thought of it, the common room, the train compartment, the sitting room and Ron's bedroom, were all remarkably cold when he was in them this week. Could Ron have been doing that? Was he affecting the environment around him? Why had she never truly paid attention those instances before? He'd made it snow above his own head after ending it with Lavender. Even in the tent, especially on the night he left, it had been so cold. Harry even remarked at how unfazed Ron was, compared to him, after retrieving the sword of Gryffindor from that icy water.
"I'm tempted to get Harry to sleep in here; he might freeze to death up there with Ron." Ginny, sat up quickly at Hermione's panicked look. "I'm not serious! He'll be fine. Although, Mum said that the day that Fred…" she gulped at the mention of his name, "that Fred and George turned his teddy bear into a spider, after he'd went crazy, screaming his head off, she put him to bed and when she went to check up on him, there was thin layer of snow in his bedroom. I think that was the worst of it. Ron had always just ignored the heavy stuff after that, well until Alfie died, he figured if he acted like he was somewhere else or made a stupid joke, he could keep control. But he can't control this. Ron and I were so close to Fred and George. George watched out for me and Fred watched out for Ron. It was like that when we were little. The spider thing was actually George's idea and when Ron lost it the way he did, Fred turned on him. I think it was the only time the twins had EVER fought. I hardly remember it, Ron and I were too little. But that's what we were told."
For a few minutes Ginny told Hermione more stories about being alone with Fred and George when Percy went off to Hogwarts. Eventually the stories petered out and Ginny dozed off, her exhaustion finally taking hold of her. Hermione burrowed beneath the covers thinking of what tomorrow would be like. How cold would Ron get? She knew how much he loved Fred. She would catch Fred always watching Ron from the corner of his eye, even as they grew older. The twins were impossibly close, but they also had a hold on Ron, their baby brother, the one who always lived in their shadows. As much as he wanted to have his chance in the sun, perhaps Ron had learned to flourish in the cold of his brothers' shadows. Eventually she managed to settle into a light sleep, her busy mind fretting over the ice in Ron's heart. Tomorrow would be the darkest day of his life and she had to find a way to kindle the small fire the she knew resided inside of him. But the truth was she knew that there was truly nothing she could do. There was little logic in magical matters and like the breaking of a dam, one had to stand back and allow magic to run its course, while praying that the damage left behind would not be too immense.
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Just a few short hours later, the Weasleys, Harry and Hermione were up and preparing to bid Fred farewell. It was a quiet morning. Percy and Hermione joined forces in the kitchen making breakfast. Ron and Ginny went together to the village to buy some pastries for the morning and also to have following the funeral with tea. Harry hung back and dressed for the funeral, taking the solitary time to cry on his own. It was all over and he was free, but the price was too high. He knew that he would trade places with every one of his friends at this moment. Hermione knocked on Ron's bedroom door to offer consolation, but Harry had locked it. He told her through the door, that he needed to be alone and would be out in a few moments.
Ron and Ginny returned with large boxes in their hands. They set the boxes down and went their own separate ways; Ginny to her room to put on her plain black dress and fix her hair, Ron retreated to his room to put on his suit. He'd dressed in a few minutes and stood in front of a mirror attempting to tie his necktie, Harry watched him from his camp bed, already dressed and unwilling to leave his friend alone. After many failed attempts with the necktie, Harry rose and held out his hand. Ron handed him the tie and watched Harry effortlessly tie the knot. He then stood before Ron and slipped the tie over his head, fixed his collar and adjusted the tie on his neck.
"Where'd you learn to do this?"
"You pick up domestic talents having an obese, lazy uncle who hates you. I had to have his neckties prepared for him every morning so he could go to work. But I didn't put them on him. This is special treatment for you…my work husband."
"Ah, well…thank you, love. I'd kiss you, but our marriage has cooled. I don't know how to tell you this, but I'm having an affair with your best friend. I haven't slept with her yet, but I plan to."
"Git. Well, I'm madly in love with your sister, so…"
They shared a laugh. It was the first time they had laughed together in so long. Truly, it felt like forever.
"I know this means nothing right now, mate, but you are going to be alright. I'm not saying the pain will go away, because it won't, but you'll learn to be alright."
"I know that. You're here, so I know I will be alright. And don't you go blaming yourself, Harry. We all chose to fight with you. You didn't do anything wrong. I don't resent you. No one does. If you died…if you died…I'd be in the same shape too, so don't go bargaining."
They shared a long hug, bound by grief and love in equal measure. They may have only known each other for less than a decade, but they were brothers. They held on to each other longer than they normally would, they seldom were alone anymore and they savored the fleeting moment that had to just be "Ron and Harry." Harry took the time to take inventory of the fact that Ron's skin was growing colder. His grief coupled with his own natural magic was causing a worrisome reaction.
They prepared to make their way downstairs as the hour to begin the funeral was quick approaching when Harry stopped Ron at the door.
"You can't hold it in forever, Ron. It will only hurt you and you know the last thing Fred would ever want is for you to hurt. Sometimes trying too hard to be strong can kill you."
"I'll be fine Harry. I have to get down there and hold up my sister. I have to stay strong for my mum. I can't go to pieces right now. I just need to get through today." With that Ron led the way as he and Harry went downstairs and outside to begin the impossible task of saying goodbye to Fred.
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The funeral was rather a rather informal event. There was no officiator. It was Lee Jordan who stood up and led the small service. George had asked that Gryffindor Quidditch players in attendance wear Black arm bands with Fred's initials, stitched in orange, on them. All that were there wore them. There were to be eight pallbearers who would carry Fred's coffin on their shoulders. They were Bill, Charlie, Percy, Ron, Harry, Lee, Oliver Wood and Dean Thomas. George had initially wanted to carry the coffin, but by that morning, he was in a weak and frail state. Dean had stood in for him. Bill and Charlie had offered stories about Fred. Bill talked about how he had to bribe Fred to keep his mouth shut when he snuck a girlfriend to the burrow, he told this one offering a clumsy apology to his shocked parents and annoyed wife. Charlie talked about the week where Fred and George, led by Fred, challenged themselves to hide and scare Charlie at least once a day in the most creative ways possible. The most memorable scare was when they hid under his bed for nearly four hours one night until he fell asleep, only to make the largest racket they could make, thus sending him airborne off of his bed.
The rest were various Quidditch stories and the nearly terroristic level of pranks that Fred led in the halls of Hogwarts. However no one was prepared for what would be the funeral's most poignant moment. Arthur Weasley rose from his seat and stood before his family, friends and guests. He told a tale about the two week period where Fred gave the same answer every time he was asked about any missing items. The story would become titled by all who heard it…they called it "I Ate It."
"My son Fred. I'd be lying if I didn't say that he was a completely strange boy. It was so fortuitous that he and Georgie were born on April fool's Day. Those two were playing pranks and making each other laugh since the day they were born. I remember the day that they realized that they looked exactly alike. Oh, they were so confused. Molly and I laughed for hours at how wide their eyes had grown when they stood together in front of a mirror. They had to be two years old. They were devastated!"
The crowd took the moment to laugh, George cracking a wistful, albeit very brief smile and Molly laughing through her unstopping tears.
"Anyway, they had to be about five when they began hiding things from us. Ron and Ginny who served as their lackeys or victims, depending on the day, were three and two. It started small, my hat would go missing and when I asked, Fred would simply reply, 'I ate it.' Ron's teddy bear, which is the star of its own story, went missing and when I looked at Fred he would simply say, 'I ate it.' Eventually they grew more brazen; our wands would go missing, a broom or two. The entire kitchen table one day. All were 'eaten' and then magically returned by Fred."
The crowd chuckled. Hermione, who was seated between Harry and Ron, interlaced her fingers with Ron's. His hands were so cold, she jumped at the contact. On her other side, Harry sat with his arm around Ginny, who had her head on his shoulder, she laughed through her tears at the story that she vaguely remembered. Ron offered no reaction to anything. He sat in silence, his eyes fixed straight ahead, chewing on his lip. He was just trying to survive this. This was more than he could bear. Arthur continued.
"Then one day, Ron had been running around and he slammed into the end table in our sitting room and broke his mum's very expensive lamp. Now our wands could repair those things, but Ron was still terrified, because he was told over and over again not to run in the house. Molly and I heard the racket and we rushed to find out what had happened. We heard panicked voices coming from the sitting room, followed by the pitter patter or Ron's little feet retreating to some special hiding place that Fred, no doubt had picked out for him. Molly and I walked into the room and Fred and George were just standing there over the remains of the lamp. Molly asked what had happened and George said simply that the lamp had broken and we, remembering the sound of little feet, and knowing well who was responsible, asked where Ron was. Georgie stuttered on an answer, getting more red faced and finally Freddy just blurted out, 'I ate him!'"
The crowd laughed heartily, the grief of the loss temporarily replaced by the jubilation created by Fred's playful spirit. Even Ron offered up a hollow chuckle, those that surrounded him patting him on the back.
"That was Fred. Protective of his baby brother. And always ready to lie to keep him out of trouble. We told him that it was impossible to eat his brother so quickly but he insisted that he did. It was George who negotiated and said that he'd tell us where Ron was, if we promised not be angry over the lamp. Fred would tell you the sky was yellow and he would make you believe it. He was a charismatic and charming young clown. He was a good boy, who grew to be a very good and noble man. He came here with a smile on his face and he left here with a smile on his face. If nothing else, that should give us some semblance of comfort in this terrible time to know that he left us with a joke on his lips. We will miss him, but I ask you all not to despair, he's happy and he is building one hell of a world for us over on the other side. I'll miss you Freddy Boy and I'll see you soon, but I promise not to rush to see you, I know you'd like me to enjoy the world that you helped fight for and gave your life for. So, I say farewell to you and ask you to look in on us from time to time and see how good we're being. Goodbye, son."
The laughter was replaced by sniffles and quiet sobs. Ginny had crumbled entirely, sobbing and screaming in complete grief. Harry attempted to comfort her but Ron bolted to her and escorted her off to the side where he stayed holding on to her until she calmed down. Hermione's own grief spilled over, as well and Harry, prompted by the desperate look on Ron's face rushed to her. Harry held tight to Hermione until she composed herself.
The service was closed by Lee who recited a comedic poem he wrote in Fred's honor. The eight original pallbearers carried Fred's coffin to the family plot where they placed it and used their wands to lower it into the earth. Molly who had to be held up wailed for the boy she would never see again and Arthur whispered words of comfort to his wife. Harry took care of both Ginny and Hermione who clung to him with all the strength they had left. Once the coffin was lowered, everyone threw a handful of earth into Fred's grave and the group retreated back to the house. George, Bill, Ron, Percy and Charlie stayed behind to fill the grave. Hermione pulled away from Harry in an attempt to stay with Ron, whose façade she knew was coming to pieces, but Harry sternly pulled her to the house, reassuring her that they were using magic and would follow soon. He also reminded her that should Ron break down, he was with his brothers and they knew what to do.
Everyone gathered inside different parts of the house, having tea, eating cakes and biscuits and tearfully or joyfully sharing memories of Fred. Ron and the boys had returned to the house and joined in, except George who remained at Fred's grave, imploring his brothers to just leave him for a bit. Bill joined Fleur in the sitting room. Charlie and Percy joined Arthur and Molly by the fire. Ginny stayed attached to Harry's side for the remainder. Hermione joined Ron in the kitchen who continued silently brewing tea and putting it on trays and taking it around to whoever needed some. Hermione dared not pressure Ron into releasing his long pent emotions but she stayed close enough to be there for him when the time did come.
Not surprisingly the time came after everyone went home. Only the immediate family, Fleur, Hermione and Harry remained. They gathered in the kitchen talking quietly, with Percy and Ginny cleaning up after the guests. Molly and Arthur retreated to the bedroom to mourn Fred together. Ron who sat stonily at the table suddenly rose from his seat and excused himself, a vague look of panic crossing his features. He silently walked to the back door and let himself out. They began to call out to him but he didn't respond to any of their calls. Charlie jumped from his seat and chased after Ron. The others also followed, keeping considerable distance between themselves and Charlie.
"Oh god, what's he going to do?" Hermione asked mostly to herself.
Ron walked to the lake and continued around its border until he reached the point that had a steep drop off straight away. As he walked he removed his jacket and his tie, tearing the shirt open buttons flying off in all directions. He savagely stripped his shirt off, only leaving his undershirt and his trousers on. Without warning he walked off the edge and allowed himself to plunge straight into the lake that reached at least 3 meters in depth at that point. Charlie yelled his name and ran full speed after him, the others also jumping to action. The water was dark and Ron could not be seen beneath its surface. The water seemed to settle and Charlie stood there watching, waiting for Ron to resurface. Suddenly there was a storm of bubbles that broke the surface from where Ron jumped in. While some of them stood there puzzled over what they were seeing, Hermione knew what was happening beneath the lake's surface.
He was screaming.
He was screaming as loud as he possibly could where no one could hear him. She watched tearfully as he finally released his pent up grief in the best way he could. Once the bubbles stopped, she and everyone else waited for him to come up for air but to their horror they watched as a thin layer of ice began to cover the top of the lake from around the edges. Charlie sprang to action as the ice fully engulfed the surface of the lake.
He pointed his wand and shouted, "Diffindo!" The ice broke and he jumped in and pulled his brother from the lake's murky depths. As soon as Ron's blind concentration was broken the ice instantly melted away and he allowed himself to be dragged onto the grass. Gasping for air, the clarity that had been missing from his eyes returned and then finally, to everyone's relief, Ron broke. He cried out for Fred and allowed himself to be comforted by Charlie. Ginny joined in, wrapping her arms around Ron and humming gently to him, and the others surrounded the two youngest Weasley's and for the next hour there were tears, jokes, gentle laughter, softly sung songs and a perfect outpouring of love and sadness over the hole left in their family. They had lost Fred but he had brought them all together, as they had been in younger years and simpler times. At the very least that felt good.
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Later that night, Bill and Fleur went home, George went to bed, Charlie went for a fly, Percy sat by the fire with the newspaper and Harry and Ginny disappeared to be alone. Ron had dried off and put on his normal casual clothes and talked Hermione onto a broom for five seconds to join him on the roof of the shed. They sat under the waning moon and chatted about everything that came to mind. Eventually Hermione was able to bring up Ron's emotional state and his unstable magic.
"Can I be forward, Ron?"
"Always."
"What happened to you this week? I understand you holding it in and all, but the ice…Ron what was that? And why have you not told me about it?"
"I don't know. All wizards and witches have some sort of wandless magic. You know that. I mean, Harry made glass disappear at the zoo when Dudley pushed him too far. The whole 'cold' thing never caused problems. The first time I made it snow, I was a toddler, I don't even remember it and to be fair, I had just had the shit scared out of me. And once I got a wand it stopped. I never had to deal with anything too emotional after that anyway, so it never came up. I wasn't trying to hide it from you. I'm sorry if you think that, but I wasn't. I wouldn't hide anything from you."
"I know you weren't hiding it from me. But, what about the lake? The ice over the water? Did you try to kill yourself, Ron?"
"No. No, I didn't mean that. I honestly don't know what happened there. I just wanted to scream and I didn't want to scare anyone. I figured, do it underwater…they won't hear you. I'm sorry I scared you." He gently took Hermione's hand, interlacing their fingers and she noticed with a growing smile, that his hands were warm again, which of course meant that the rest of him was warm too.
"You're okay now though?"
"Yeah I'm getting there." He laid back and opened his arms to her. She joined him, snuggling into him and gently nuzzling his neck. "I'm not just saying this as a boyfriend, I mean, I am but, I'm also saying this as the guy whose known you since he was eleven…I love you, Hermione. Thanks for being here today. Thanks for keeping an eye on me."
"I'll always keep an eye on you, Ron. What would you do if I didn't?"
He shrugged, his carefree self slowly resurfacing. "Freeze to death, I think."
She laughed and wrapped her arms tighter around him. "I love you too, Ron."
"My teaspoon runneth over."
For the rest of the night, while some tears were still shed for those who they'd lost, Ron and Hermione had a clear view of who they were to each other and what they wanted from each other for the time being. They knew that this wasn't the end of it; they would have to honor the others in the coming days. There would be so many more tears, so much more grief. They would have to address the issue of Hermione's parents. They would have to discuss returning to Hogwarts. They would have to address the issue of the responsibilities that came with being a couple. Tomorrow, they would have to get their priorities settled and begin life in the brave new world that they have to help rebuild, but for this moment, for this night, on the roof of the shed, eagerly exploring themselves and each other, they would be two teenagers in love. For now, that was enough.
'Love means the body, the soul, the life, the entire being. We feel love as we feel the warmth of our blood, we breathe love as we breathe air, we hold it in ourselves as we hold our thoughts. Nothing more exists for us.' - Guy de Maupassant
AN: I hope it was okay. I was thinking to myself, why do bad things happen when you're about to get the guy/the girl you've wanted for so long? Anyway, I wanted to use ice, because it's so different compared to Ron's "fiery" appearance. Reviews are welcome and please be constructive and mature. I do respond to all reviewers.
