A/N: A late St. Patrick's Day fic in the Death Note way. Nothing gets more hilarious than that, my friends, except L talking slang in that one episode when Matsuda pretends to be drunk. After that, I couldn't help but wonder...So, I wrote this about a year ago and actually laughed at my demented humor. With that said, you have been forewarned. Oooooo...XD

Disclaimer: I don't own Death Note or St. Patrick's Day merchandise.

Green Beer Excess

Matsuda had a fun time last night...a really fun time. In fact, he enjoyed the party he attended so much that he drank a little too much green beer. But, it had been St. Patrick's Day and what else was he supposed to do? Determined that no one would call him a stiff, he gulped down six pints of beer without regard to later consequences. However, now that his fun had long since concluded, he discovered the painful way that hangovers are not fun at all.

During the daily meeting the task force always ensured to take place, he slurred languidly in his speech and kept complaining of migraines. L, displeased at observing Matsuda's obvious drunkenness, remarked, "I see that you enjoyed the holiday last night, Matsuda."

"What? Oh, yeah...yeah, I did. It was great... I got to wear this awesome hat...and we made up our brackets for those teams...that play that game with the hoops!"

"I believe 'that game with the hoops' is called basketball," L responded dryly, though in a rather cold tone of voice.

"Y—yeah, that one!"

Irritable at his colleague's incompetence, Aizawa decided to reprimand the second youngest member. "Well, you shouldn't have been out celebrating when you know you have to work every day."

"I know...but it was so much fun...aw, my head hurts."

"I think you had one green beer too many, Matsuda," Light agreed. "Maybe you should follow my example, because I have the common sense to not drink."

For some reason, L suppressed the urge to roll his eyes at this comment, but remained focused on the current problem at hand. "If you don't contribute enough today, I will be forced to suspend you. Is that understood?"

Matsuda now experienced drunken anger as he shouted, "You're just saying that because you hate me!"

The other members turned their gazes to the detective leading them.

"That, gentlemen...may actually be true," he replied evenly, causing the unfortunate cop to become even more furious.

"Well, whatever, I'm taking the day off!" Matsuda called over his shoulder as he stumbled out the door.

Even though being fired should have been a threat to the overenthusiastic man that day, he was spared due to L's mercy.

And the fact that Matsuda, in a drunken fit of rage, had returned to the hotel where the case was currently being conducted and poured the rest of his green beer all over L. Ever since that day, Matsuda can barely remember March 18th of 2008.

A/N: How was that for random?!? XD I know basketball isn't that huge in Japan (especially college basketball around this month here in the United States), but hey, had to put that in there. For some reason, I could really see Matsuda being this wasted to the point that he accuses L of hating him. Think about it, guys, they were really at odds...XD