"Ugh! Es!" A disgusted voice shouted from the top of their lungs.

At Espio's house, he and Shadow were in his bedroom hanging out together as they both enjoyed their day off from working at the Chaotix.

Espio was on the computer looking up pointless stuff as he was bored out of his mind. Shadow's shouting got his attention so he looked away from the computer screen to look at him. "What's wrong, Shad?" He saw him sitting on his bed, staring at a magazine in disgust.

The hedgehog gave the chameleon a strange look, "You're so gross! How can you leave tons of porno mags under your bed like that?"

Espio made a slight blush in embarrassment. "Well at least I don't have a secret stash of Suicide Girls hidden under my floorboard like someone I know!"

"Who the hell do you think you're directing that to? I don't look at that smut!"

"Yeah right, Shad!" Espio crossed his arms and turned away from him. "At least I get off on normal smut unlike you who gets off on chicks cutting themselves!"

His comments practically made Shadow fall to the floor, "Shut the fuck up! You don't know what the hell you're talking about!"

The chameleon smirked as he faced the computer screen again, "Yeah whatever."

Shadow began to make another comment back until he saw him suddenly looking busy on the computer. He got off of his bed and looked over his shoulder to see what he was up to. He saw him typing to someone over an instant messaging conversation. "What are you doing?"

"Talking to some chick", he answered as he continued to type.

Shadow's eyes then widened when he saw the girls' reply in the conversation. He began to snicker a bit as he read it, "You sound sexy", he laughed. "Heh, trying to get laid with fifty year old hags?"

Espio blushed deeply in embarrassment and glared at the hedgehog. "You mind? I'm trying to have a private conversation here!"

Shadow began to laugh harder, "Do you know her name?"

"Well...", he began to explain. "...To be safe, we use fake names. Like my name over the web is BMN and hers is Kat."

Shadow blinked in confusion towards his fake name, "BMN?"

"Badass medical ninja, but she just thinks those are my initials."

Shadow sighed, "Figures...Hey do you even know what she looks like?"

Espio paused for a moment and looked away from him, "Uh...no."

"What? That doesn't sound safe to me. For all you know, that could be some old dude trying to get into your pants."

The chameleon began to blush more, "It's not an old guy and she'll prove it to me when we meet."

Shadow rose an eyebrow doubting if they both will ever meet. "Which will be when?"

"Tonight", he spoke softly as he continued to type back to her over the computer.

"Well", he spoke. "Good luck with that...you'll need it", he snickered.

An anger mark formed on his head, "Shut up, pervert!"

"Who are you calling a pervert you, pervert!"

"You! You pervert!"

Later that night, Espio was getting everything spruced up in his house for his meet with the girl he had met over the internet. The chameleon was wearing his best black suit as he paced around in his living room, hoping what Shadow had said wasn't true. 'Please don't let her be an old guy!' He had hoped. 'Please God! Please!' He was then interrupted from his thoughts when the doorbell rung. He figured it was her. He hesitantly began to walk towards the door to answer it. When he placed his hand over the doorknob, he turned it, and opened the door. His eyes widened when he saw the most unexpected person standing at his door. "Wha-what?" His eyes were glued to a female purple cat woman wearing a skin tight long black dress giving him a shy and embarrassed look. "T-Tonya?"

She placed a finger to her bottom lip, "Oh darn", she spoke softly. "I just knew I got the address wrong."

"What?" Espio said in utter confusion. "Tonya, what's going on?"

She took her eyes away from him nervously, "Uh..."

Later, the two decided to sit on the sofa together to discuss their awkward situation.

"So..." Espio started, "...That's what you're here for? You thought you were going to meet with that guy you spoke with on the internet."

The cat blushed, "I know. This is so embarrassing."

The chameleon formed a small smile, finding the situation somewhat funny. "Don't worry about it, Ton. I guess we both kinda lucked out tonight."

Tonya began to wonder what he had meant, "Huh?"

"This is kind of funny, but I met this woman over the internet and we were planning to meet tonight as...well?"

Silence filled the room as the two stared at each other.

The cat rose an eyebrow towards the chameleon, "BMN?"

Espio gave her the same funny look, "Kat?"

"Oh my God!" They both shouted. "You're the one!"

"Holy crap! Espio! You're BMN! Oh God!" She yelled in panic. She began to fluster as she felt his arm around her shoulder.

"So, Tonya", he began as he whispered to her seductively. "You're my date for this evening eh? I say let's get things a little warmed up shall we?"

She blushed in aggravation as she slapped him hard in the face and began to walk out the door. "Goodbye, Espio!"

He held out his hand towards her while he held his burning cheek. "Hey, Ton! Wa-wait!"

Before she could storm out of his house, she turned her head to him, "What to do you want, pervert?"

A sweat drop formed in the back of the chameleon's head. "I wish everyone would stop calling me that." He took his hand away from his searing red cheek and faced her. "Can't we just hang out once, Ton? I won't force you to do anything you don't want to do. I promise."

She stared at him for a few seconds, trying to look for trust within his yellow eyes. She then decided sitting with him to just talk wouldn't hurt. She sighed heavily, "Fine."

Espio formed a wide smile full of excitement as Tonya sat back down on the sofa with him. 'Yes!' He shouted in his mind. 'I finally get to spend time with her!'

The purple cat turned to him with annoyance it seemed, "So, you're BMN huh?" She crossed her arms, "What does that stand for? It's clearly not your initials."

"Oh that? BMN as in badass medical ninja", he answered.

Tonya gave him a funny look as her ears twitched.

"Hey! Don't give me that look! It's all true you know."

She sighed, "Yeah whatever. You're so full of yourself."

"Oh yeah? What about yours kitty Kat?"

"Oh shut up", she murmured as she looked down at the floor in sadness.

Espio noticed her sudden sadness, "Hey Ton, what's up? You seem kinda down."

"Well it's..."

"Uh-huh..." He began to grow impatient by waiting for her answer.

She began to fidget her fingers while she had them clasped together in her lap. "Well, I was just looking forward to meeting someone who finally understood me."

He couldn't help but to twitch a bit as she spoke that. "What? Um, hello! The guy you met over the internet was me and everything we spoke about was true you know? It turns out that you and I both are a lot alike than we thought huh?"

She sighed and kept her eyes away from him.

Espio thought that she still didn't want the guy she met over the internet to be him. "Come on, Ton. I don't see a problem here. What's wrong with me?"

"Nothing it's just...I don't know."

Espio had never been so confused with her before. He was completely lost. He wondered why she didn't want to go out with him. He then decided to just give up on her. He sighed sadly, "It's all right. You don't have to explain yourself."

The cat turned to him in shock, "I...don't?"

He shook his head slowly, "No, besides I'm sure you have a good reason anyway."

She tried to form at least a small smile to show that she was finally giving up on her, but she couldn't. She watched him look down at his watch.

"You can leave if you want." He looked away from his watch and faced her once again. "I'm sorry about your dream date."

Tonya's ears flopped down in sadness. She had hoped that she didn't hurt his feelings. "Espio..." She began.

"Yeah?"

"I'm sorry if I sounded like a total jerk to you."

The chameleon wondered what had changed her mood all of a sudden. "You...are?"

"When I met that guy over the internet...now that I think about it, he did sound like you."

"It did?" He spoke in a soft voice.

"The things you always said towards me...I recognized it and your face popped in my head several times. And if I liked the guy over the internet, then I should like you too."

He then saw her stand from the sofa and leaned over to him to kiss him on the forehead.

"Anyway, I'm sorry I ruined our date." Before she could leave, she felt a hand tugging on her wrist. When she spun around, she found herself in his loving embrace as his head rested on her forehead. She blushed deeply as he held her in his arms, "E-Espio?" A finger was then placed on her lips.

The chameleon hushed her softly then slowly slipped his finger away from her lips.

Tonya's eyes widened when she felt his lips on hers. She had no idea what was going on, but she loved it. The feel of his lips on hers was a great feeling and she strangely didn't want it to stop. She couldn't help but to wrap her arms around his neck and kiss him as well.

As she kissed him, Espio felt her tongue beginning to explore his mouth. He moaned as her tongue soon came in contact with his. He wanted to think that this whole thing was a dream, but it truly wasn't.

As they both engaged in a passionate lip lock, it all just seemed that they would stay that way forever.

The feline couldn't help but to moan in ecstasy as she felt him kiss down to her neck softly.

Espio couldn't help but to smirk in the inside because of her reactions. He decided to get her even more fired up by gently nibbling on her neck. He held her warm body close to his as he took his tongue and licked her upper chest.

The cat began to moan a little louder as he licked her and slid his hands over her stomach. She felt like she was about to just fall into his arms, but instead he placed her body down onto the sofa. As she laid there, she watched him get on top of her and continued to worship her body.

His lips traveled from her upper chest down to her breasts as he began to undo his tie and start to take off the rest of his clothes.

She threw her arm over her head and shut her eyes as she took all he had to give to her in. She then felt his exposed body rubbing against hers. She opened her eyes and saw his exposed muscular chest. She didn't know that he was so muscular. She wanted to drool over him so much. With her thinking about it, it made her even more aroused.

The chameleon took her body from the sofa and held her in his arms once again as he began to search for the zipper to her dress. "Damn it...", he murmured.

"What's wrong?" She asked in a seductive tone.

"Where's the fucking zipper to this thing?" He had asked in a frustrated tone.

She couldn't help but to laugh a bit at his eagerness to take off her dress. She soon heard the zipper being undone to her dress. She figured he had finally found it. When she saw her black dress fall to the floor, she found Espio back on top of her. She continued to moan as he began to massage her soft breasts.

As he massaged them, he began to suck as well.

All Tonya could feel was his mouth over her breasts while his tongue helped to caress them. She couldn't help but to call his name as he sucked, "Espio!"

The chameleon took his mouth away from her breasts and began to send butterfly kisses down to her lower body. He caressed her thighs as he began to lick her wet and sweet smelling opening.

Once his tongue came in contact with her entrance, she cried out in orgasm. Her hands clenched the sofa as he licked her wet walls even more. "Oh God! Yes!" She felt his tongue lick every inch of her wetness that was inside of her until she felt himself go completely rock hard.

He took his dripping wet mouth away from her entrance and began to place himself inside of her.

She winced as she felt him push himself inside of her tight opening until it was completely inside of her. She groaned as he began to thrust himself in and out of her in a fast pace. With every thrust he made, she had groaned louder and louder.

He could then feel himself about to release his juices inside of her and soon he did. As he gave her one final thrust, he cried out in orgasm and came into her. With his juices overflowing from inside of her, he panted in exhaustion and fell on top of her body. He faced her as he panted and smiled, "See? The first date wasn't as bad as you thought it would be huh?"

She formed a small smile, "Fine. For once, I guess you were right."

"We should really do this more often."

She rose an eyebrow at the chameleon, "Heh, we'll see."

Espio paused for a moment, trying to sink what she had just said into his mind. He made a grimaced look. "We'll see? What the hell kind of answer is that?"

Tonya did nothing but laugh.

"Tonya?" He called. "You didn't really mean that did you?"

The cat continued to laugh.

"Tonya? Tonya!"

A/N:

Shadow: Hmm, did Es just get played?

Jasmine: Erm, I think so?

Espio: No! No! No! Impossbile! I am the ultimate chick magnet!

Jasmine:...Right. Anyways! In the next fic Shadow is...gay?

Espio: *gasp*

Shadow:...Oh my fuck! I've finally come out the closet!?

Rouge: No! My boyfriend is gay? Where did I go wrong? *sobs*

Espio: Where did the fuck did your brain go, Jas-chan?

Jasmine: Out the freakin' window apparently...

The original title and idea of the fic was going to be called The Purfect Call, and Espio and Tonya were gonna meet over the phone not the internet, but I liked the way the first part went so I stuck with it. Also credit to Shadowmjl for the idea. Thanks, dude.

Now prepare for the most weird ass fic you'll ever read from me...except Darkest Dawn of course. Keep an eye out for Dark Hearts. Coming at you soon!