His fingers were shivering.
Undoubtedly, the proud corporal's fingers were shivering over the final buckle of the problematic harness, but it was weird, considering that he only had to lock the final belt over his chest. So why was he shivering, as if he was hesitating?
Petra couldn't, no matter how hard she tried, finding an answer to this puzzling question, a question that surfaced out of tiny crack opening in the door, showing her the sight of a shivering man.
Was he scared? Was his age catching up to him? Every time she thought of a question it would fall apart due to some idea that seemed to make it not work.
It was a question she never actually got an answer too.
Every morning when she would pass by his door she'd see the tremor in his hands as he finished his harness. She would see the hesitation he dealt with when putting his belts on.
Petra wanted to help him. Somehow, anyhow, she wanted to help him. He was her captain after all. Well, he was more than that, but at that period it didn't matter.
Until one day she had a brilliant idea. Tea.
It was a simple, easy way to help him calm down.
"I made too much." She would say as she carried a tray with a cup of coffee in his room in the morning. "We have new tea, sir, I thought you might like it." Would be an excuse for another day. Sometimes she didn't use an excuse. Levi stopped scolding her for making too much tea at some point and she'd find him doing nothing until she brought him his tea. He was getting addicted to the small act of kindness she gave him, but he never said a word about it.
Even when they became intimate.
Petra knew better than to ever ask about why he was shivering. Sometimes, on a good day, she wouldn't even notice it. Sometimes, it was more pronounced than ever before.
Despite the shivering, Petra still admired him, loved him and took care of him as he took care of her. Not so open and not so obvious but he cared for her nevertheless.
Happiness gives us courage.
So it had with Petra. She saw his fingers were trembling badly one morning, so she got up and helped him. Her fingers went gently over his, and she carefully helped him finish the straps. She saw the flash of fear, disbelief, and a touch of anger flash in those dark eyes, but he said nothing.
It became a routine then.
Petra would help him into his belts, harnesses and the like. She'd gently tie his cravat and made sure that his uniform was set in place like it should be.
Levi was more than grateful. Yet he never told her that.
"How long do you think we'll be doing this?" She asked him, her own hands hesitating over his buckle.
"Doing what?" His voice was flat, showing no interest. Petra didn't dare to look up.
"Fighting. Dying. Getting hurt. Getting you into these silly straps." She swallowed hard and finished up the back and went around him to do that one final strap.
Levi was quiet as he simply watched her. This time he laid his fingers over hers and leaned down to kiss the corner of her mouth. "I'll hand in our resignation papers when we come back. I don't really give a shit about any of that anymore. When all the paperwork is done, we can go talk to your father about us." His voice lacked it's usual roughness and coldness, so Petra couldn't help but to look up.
For the first time, she couldn't read his face.
"You don't have to."
"I want to. That's the difference. I'm tired of always worrying that I will turn around and you won't be there with me. That some titan will snap your spine in half and swallow you. That your horse will trip and you'll fall, getting hurt, and becoming nothing more than a sitting duck for them. I'm getting old, Petra. I want to start a family or some other melodramatic bullshit. I don't want this. I want more. And that more, isn't in this legion."
Petra's eyes filled up just slightly and she swallowed hard. She hid her face in his chest and sighed softly when she felt his hands on her back.
"I'll always be here.. I'll always make sure your straps are tight enough."
"Promise?"
"Promise."

Levi's fingers tremble now more than ever.