AN:Hello! I just have to say that I'm so excited! This is my first Glee story and it's about my favourite couple. My recent obsession has been Glee for the last few months and I think it's about time I posted a story. Anyway I really hope you'll like this, I put a lot of work in to it. Don't forget to review!
"Need by-"
Puck: Hey! Writer or whatever, you forgot something!
Isabelle(me): What are you talking about?
Puck: Starts with a d, will possibly stop you from getting sued... Ringing any bells?
Quinn: Don't be such a jerk, Puck. This girl has been nice enought to write this utterly fantastic story on me.
Sam: And me!
Isabelle(me): No, it's alright, Quinn. Sam, you blond-abtastic-my-favourite-hottie-in-Glee, would you like to do the honours?
Sam: Honors? What the heck are you talking about?
Puck(raises eyebrows): Seriously, Lady Lips? Been eating too many AirHeads lately?(sighs at Sam's confused look) Whatever, I'll do it. Isabelle(writingismypassion27) does not own Glee-the amazing tv show with super hot Mark Salling on it- and does not own any of the character's featured in this amazing story. Everything mentioned belongs to Ryan Murphy and any other rightful owners.
Need
By
Isabelle(writingismypassion27)
She wakes up with tangled hair and sweaty legs. She tossed and turned all night and it shows. The sheets are wound around her legs and her comforter is on the floor. Her hair is damp and her cheeks pale. She needs a shower to cool down and wash it all away. But what she really wishes it would do is wash away all the feelings swirling around inside her.
The water is scorching hot and it burns her skin. Goosebumps rise where her skin is un-exposed to the water. She scrubs furiously at invisible dirt on her skin and it leaves it red.
She's standing in her room, her bath robe pulled tight around her. Her mirror is in front of her and as she lets the robe drop, she's swept by an overload of emotion. Sadness. Despair. Guilt. Love. Desperation. Frustration. They all rush through as she stands there looking at her naked body.
She's still getting used to picking out her clothes in the morning. It used to be Cheerio's uniform, sneakers and a ponytail. Now it's whatever she feels like wearing that day. But what she really feels like wearing is black. After she puts on the last piece of her outfit, a cardigan, she briefly touches the ring on a chain strung around her neck. She tucks it inside her shirt and then leaves her bedroom.
The car ride to school seems longer than it should be. When she pulls into the parking lot of William McKinley High School, she turns off the engine and leans her head against the steering wheel of her red coupe. She doesn't want to go inside and face them all. She doesn't want to go inside and pretend that she's fine, because she's not.
She takes long strides down the hallway with her chin up. Glee is meeting in two minutes and she's finally nearing the choir room. She enters the room and notices that everyone is already there. She takes a seat beside Rachel but doesn't speak. Mr. Schue walks in and begins talking but she's not really listening.
She sees Finn coming toward, pushing his way through the crowd of students. She slams her locker shut and pretends not to see him before taking off down the hallway. She doesn't want to deal with Finn right now. She doesn't love him and she never will again The only reason she had wanted to be with him was for a selfish reason. He was head quarterback and popular and he would make her popular again. He would make her Prom queen.
She's standing in the hallway alone. She's supposed to be in History but she doesn't feel like going. As she sits down against the lockers, she hears the echo of footsteps on the linoleum. The person rounds the corner and then the footsteps stop. She looks up. It's Sam. He gazes down at her on the ground, with an unreadable expression on his face. She gazes back into his eyes, soberly. They stay that way for a while, just staring at each other until Sam looks away and then quickly walks off down the hall. She wants to call after him and tell him how she feels, but she can't. Something inside her-probably her pride- holds her back and the words catch in her throat.
History class was her last and as the bell rings, she runs to her locker and shoves her books in her bag. She takes off down the hall after slamming her locker door shut. She doesn't want to talk to anyone, let alone Finn. She feels like she's about to cry and she can't let anyone see her cry herself sick. The tears start to gather in the corners of her eyes and as she bursts through the school doors, she starts to run toward her car. A droplet of water falls on her and then another and another and she realizes it's raining. She stops at her car and tilts her head back, letting the cold water run down her face. The tears are falling now but no one will notice since they mix with the rain. She doesn't notice her bag drop from her hands and when she sits down on her heels and wraps her arms around herself. She's trying to hold herself together but she knows there's no point, people are bound to have already seen her. Tomorrow, news of Quinn Fabray's "emotional break-down in the parking lot" will be all over the school. As she cries, she doesn't notice the certain blonde boy watching her from beside his jeep.
After her break-down in the parking lot, she managed to get in her car and drive home. That she remembers vaguely. But when she gets home, she crawls up to her room and falls on the bed, her hand blindly searching for the t-shirt. As her hands clutch to her chest the Avatar t-shirt Sam got her for her Christmas, she cries into her pillow so her mother won't hear her. She misses Sam, she really does. It was only after they broke up that she realized that she loved him and now it's too late. Every day she sees him, in the halls, with Santana, in Glee; and every time all she wants to do is tell him that she loves him and beg for his forgiveness. But she can't, she won't. She's too afraid of what would happen, what he would say. She's too scared to take off her mask, take off her mask with its strong bitch cover and the safety it brings. She knows what they say is true; you never really know how much you love someone until their gone.
She falls asleep with tears drying on her face and she wakes up shivering and her body sore. After she overcomes the sleep that threatens to come again, she glances at the alarm clock with bleary eyes. 1:34. She slept for over five hours. She notices that her lights are off and there's a blanket draped over her. She gets off her bed and yawns, and remembers that she's still wearing her clothes from school. She changes into pajama bottoms and a hoodie and heads toward the door. The only light on is in the hallway and it gives off an eerie glow as she tip toes down the stairs. She switches on the lights in the kitchen just as her stomach growls. She hasn't eaten since lunch yesterday and she feels like she could eat a horse. She gets a snack and then heads toward the living room, switching on that light as she goes. The couch is comfortable and she snuggles underneath the blanket. As she flips through the channels, her finger stops as the familiar face of Patrick Swayze appears on the huge screen. As soon as the camera switches to Jennifer Grey's face, she feels overwhelming sadness. She recognizes the scene and she knows the ending is coming soon. The first opening notes are struck and soon the song is filling the room and it's surrounding her and drowning her. Memories are swarming in her head and all she can think about is her duet with Sam at Sectionals. They had been so great together and she remembers his face, so happy and loving. He loved her and she hurt him. A lot. She can't take it back, she wants to so much but she can't. She's so frustrated with herself and her life, she wants to scream. Why had she kissed Finn? Why? She knew why, really. It had been because those kisses had seemed so forbidden and dangerous. They had been exciting and different. That's why there were fireworks. That's why she cheated on her boyfriend.
She falls asleep with last lines of the song echoing through her head and she wakes up to the early morning sunlight shining on her and a person leaning over her. It's her mother, she's looks concerned.
"Quinnie, are you alright?" her mother says, softly. She wants to cry and tell her mother how awful everything is right now but she can't. Her mother and her never had a close relationship and she's never shared her feelings with her before.
"Yeah." She answers and her mother stands straight as she gets up off the couch.
"Would you like some breakfast? I don't have to work until a little later this morning so I could make you something to eat." Judy Fabray smiles softly at her daughter and touches her shoulder lightly. "You have plently of time before school starts."
Quinn's about to answer no but her stomach growls in protest. "That would be nice. I mean yes, please." She answers and her mother disappears into the kitchen. As soon as her mother's heeled foot disappears, she dashes down the hallway and up the stairs to her room. She takes another scalding hot shower and it's no different than yesterdays. Her feelings are still there.
She dresses the same as she did yesterday, flowing dress and cardigan. Again, she tucks the chain under her top. She stares at herself in the mirror for while. Her face is blemish free and her hair is as wavy as always. But she pulls up the skirt of her dress and peers at her stomach in the mirror. Sam always told her that she no stretch marks, but she sees them. They are there, and she's so ashamed of them. No matter how much cream or ointment she applies, they don't go away. She hates her body; she wishes that she could be like she was last year. Before she got pregnant, before she had a baby.
She's about to escape through the front door before her mother stops her and makes her eat breakfast. She scarfs down the pancakes and then grabs her bag and exits the house. Outside, it's damp and the sky is gray. Her car is cold and the leather seats are freezing against her thighs. She drives slowly, dreading the fact that she has to go to school. As she stops at a red light, the current song ends and drifts into another. The familiar opening chords are playing and she recognizes Jason Mraz's singing right away. This song was the beginning of her relationship with Sam. It has to be coincidence but maybe its sign. A sign that her Sam are meant to be together. That gives her confidence and as she pulls into the school parking lot, she's feels determination coursing through her.
She spots Finn beside her locker right away. She doesn't run away this time, she strides right up to him and taps him on the shoulder. A smile breaks out on his face right away as he turns around and sees her.
"We need to talk. Choir room. Now." She tells him in a commanding tone. He doesn't object, he knows her well enough to know when she means business. When they enter the choir room, she shuts the door behind him quietly and then faces him.
"Look, Finn, I don't know how to say this but-" She begins but he cuts her off.
"You want to break up. I knew right when you said you wanted to talk. It's alright, Quinn." He smiles lightly at her but there's a bit of sadness in his eyes.
"I'm sorry. You didn't do anything, I just don't think were… good together." She says sadly and looks at him steadily.
"You don't have to lie to me, Quinn. I know you still have feelings for Sam." Finn smiles again and she raises her eyebrows.
"Well, it doesn't really matter, does it?" She says wistfully and looks down at her feet. She looks back up at Finn and smiles slightly. "You should get back together with Rachel, Finn. She really does love you. You do too; you were just too distracted by me."
Finn's smile disappears and he looks as if he's lost in thought. He doesn't answer for a while. "I don't know what will happen between me and Rachel but I'm almost positive Sam still loves you." He replies and her heart skips a beat. How could he love her, after what she had done to him? She had cheated on him and broken his heart. It was impossible.
After her break up with Finn everything feels almost right to her. She and Finn were meant to be friends, nothing more. She figures she knew before but she was too focused on becoming prom queen. She sits beside Rachel in Glee again and before sitting down, she smiles softly at Rachel, who furrows her brows before smiling back. As much as she finds the brunette annoying, she thinks that she could be friends with her. When Santana walks in alone with an angry look on her face, she knows that it cannot be good. Sam follows behind her and takes a seat beside Mike, instead of beside Santana, who is sitting on the other side of the room. Mr. Schue walks in right after the last of Glee clubbers settle on the chairs.
"Well, let me say that Regional's certainly went well," Mr. Shue grins and is about to continue when she stands up. "Yes, Quinn?"
"I'd like to sing a song. " She says bluntly and he continues nodding in a very Mr. Schue-like way. "I've also changed some of the lyrics to fit." She adds. She makes her way to the center of the room and faces the other Glee kids. She takes a breath as the band begins to play the opening notes of the song. She glances at Sam, who is staring at her soberly. She begins out quietly and then her voice grows louder as she feels her emotions flow with the words of the song.
I'm so glad you made time to see me.
How's life, tell me how's your family?
I haven't seen them in a while.
You've been good, busier than ever.
We small talk, work and the weather
Your guard is up and I know why.
Cause the last time you saw me
Is still burned in the back of your mind.
You gave me roses and I left them there to die.
So this is me swallowing my pride,
Standing in front of you saying I'm sorry for that night,
And I go back to December all the time.
Turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you,
Wishing that I realized what I had when you were mine.
I'd go back to December, turn around and make it all right.
I go back to December all the time.
These days I haven't been sleeping
Staying up playing back myself leaving,
When your birthday passed and I didn't call.
And I think about summer, all the beautiful times
I watched you laughing from the passenger side
Realized that I loved you in the fall.
Then the cold came, the dark days when fear crept into my mind.
You gave me all your love and all I gave you was goodbye.
So this is me swallowing my pride,
Standing in front of you saying I'm sorry for that night.
And I go back to December all the time.
Turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you,
Wishing that I realized what I had when you were mine.
I'd go back to December turn around and change my own mind.
I go back to December all the time
The tears are staring to form in the corner of her eyes but she keeps on singing. She looks at Sam, she's singing to him and he knows it. His face is serious and she can't read any emotion on him.
I miss your blonde hair, your sweet smile, so good to me, so right,
And how you held me in your arms that September night,
The first time you ever saw me cry.
Maybe this is wishful thinking,
Probably mindless dreaming
If we loved again I swear I'd love you right.
I'd go back in time and change it but I can't
So if the chain is on your door, I understand.
But this is me swallowing my pride,
Standing in front of you saying I'm sorry for that night,
And I go back to December.
Turns out freedom aint nothing but missing you,
Wishing that I realized what I had when you were mine.
I'd go back to December turn around and make it alright.
I'd go back to December turn around and change my own mind.
I go back to December all the time.
She finishes the song and everybody claps for her. She vaguely remembers Mr. Schue complimenting her but she doesn't really pay attention. She sits down in her chair and lets her hair fall around her face. The tears are almost becoming too unbearable to hold in and she keeps taking deep breaths. As soon as Glee ends, she runs out the door and down the hallway. She runs and runs and then rounds one corner and stops. She slides down to the ground and then the tears are falling. She can't stop them, they run down her face and she can taste the saltiness off them on her lips. Her body shakes as every sob chokes out of her. She looks up as she hears someone clear their throat.
It's Sam. Again. She's embarrassed, this is the second time Sam has found her in the halls alone. He looks uncomfortable and a bit awkward. He won't meet her eyes as she glares at him. She gets to her feet and tries to sneer at him.
"What do you want, Sam?" It comes out weak and quiet, the complete opposite of what she was hoping for. She gets up off the ground and stares at him hard. He looks at her sadly and then glances at the ground.
"Singing a song isn't going to fix what you did, Quinn." There's sadness in his voice, heartbreaking sadness, as if he was in pain.
"I know." She replies quietly and suddenly she feels so guilty. Heart-wrenching guilty. It chokes another sob out of her and then the tears are flowing again. He steps forward hesitantly and then slowly wraps his arms around her. Warmth radiates off of him and she puts her own arms around him, and holds on tight.
She cries and cries and he never lets go of her. She's so glad he's here; she just needs someone to hold her while she cries.
Her sobs soon subside and she looks at his wet shirt and then she looks up. Her gaze meets his and then locks, then suddenly he's leaning down and she's stretching upward. Their lips meet and fuse together.
There are not just fireworks, there's lightning bolts and it feels like a volcano is erupting. It's passionate and full of want and need. His lips are warm and she can't believe that this is happening. She presses her body against his and her hands tangle in his hair while his hands grip the sides of her face hard. She opens her mouth and then she's overwhelmed by the taste of him.
And then he pulls away, eyes bright and hair mussed. Her heart is hammering and she gasps for air. She looks at him in wonder and touches her lips. They stare at each other, his face is expressionless and her's surprised.
Thank you. I never really got a last kiss from you." He smiles sadly and then turns to go. She reaches forward and grabs his sleeve and forcefully tugs him back around.
"Wait, Sam. You just can't leave after- after that!" She exclaims in disbelief, eyes wide with it. He pauses and stares at her, looking torn. She gazes back at him, begging silently with her eyes.
"I-What-Quinn…" He stutters and then stops. He gathers his thoughts before he answers her. "I can't, Quinn."
She stares at him. "Why?" She asks him bluntly, she doesn't understand why he has to refuse her. She knows he still loves her, they just can't kiss like that and him not love her.
"I just can't, Quinn!" He snaps and his eyes close briefly. When they open, there's regret in his eyes. The tears are already forming in the corner of her eyes and he looks like he's about to apologize before he takes off down the hall.
She stares after him, tears rolling down her cheeks. She feels so helpless and depressed. She wants him so bad. She wants him back. She wants to wear his promise ring proudly without having to hide it. She wants to hold his hand as they walk through the halls. She wants him to hold her tight. She wants to feel his big lips on hers and his hands burning on her waist. Heck, she even wants to hear him speak in Navi as they watch Avatar together again. She wants him to be hers again.
She goes to the rest of her classes in a bit of a haze. She doesn't speak to anyone and when the bell rings she's out of her class ahead of everyone. As she pulls out of the parking lot, she glances out of her review mirror. Standing by his jeep, is Sam Evans, his backpack slung over his shoulder and his eyes on her car. She stares at him in the mirror until repetitive honking from behind her forces her to put her car in gear.
AN:Did you like it? If you did or even if you didn't, tell me in a review. I also want to mention that this story isn't done and I'll try tp update soon. It'll probably be only 3 or 4 chapters. The next chapter Sam will probably sing a song and then in the third chapter, they'll reunite. Anyway, I'll just say it again, REVIEW! :)