Disclaimer: I have no rightful ownership whatsoever with any of the Naruto cast or the anime/manga plot. This story is fictional.
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Prologue: When doom dawns at day
Kakashi Hatake would normally let it all slide.
He would normally shrug it off nonchalantly, loll lazily on the black recliner, toss his feet uncaringly on the desk, and read his Icha Icha Paradise, giggling like a rabid teenager every now and then. He'd normally just ignore the boisterous mayhem for a classroom, and spew his 'shut ups' every time they'd be too noisy for him to focus on the scene inscribed in letters, playing out in front of him.
But today, of all days, wasn't a normal day. Today was his 'time of the month'. And by George was he going to let his hyperactive students ruin his day. He was damn moody.
And so, when he entered the classroom, casually swinging his hand back and forth, his orange book clasped between his fingers of his gloved, right hand, nonchalantly walking until he reached the teacher's desk where he sat, like how he usually did, on the ebony, leather recliner.
Now that was a normal routine for all of them and no one would dare complain. But what shocked the students of his was that his trademark line was not voiced out. Heck, when he entered, they had not felt that bubbly aura that was usually accentuating his jovial mood; nor did they see those fantasy clouds that surrounded him, and that hopping pony, dear Kami! It was missing!
"Where's the hopping pony, Kakashi-sensei!" Naruto Uzumaki whined, his sparkling blue eyes picking up the unusualness of the events. He probed for the bubbly creature, animatedly bobbing up and down beside, behind, up, down, left, right, his perverted teacher.
When he heard the question, Kakashi looked up from his book and, though it was not so obvious, he raised a brow, "What the hell are you talking about, Naruto?" he demanded, clearly annoyed of the interruption. It seems that the class fell silent as well, possibly waiting for the pony, no, the unicorn.
"You know!" Naruto wailed, "The pony…no, unicorn, that's always bobbing up and down when you enter class! That!" he pointed out to the thin air next to Kakashi, frantically searching for the said offender. Kakashi continued to stare incredulously. A pony? No, a unicorn for that matter! He's never even laid eyes on a fairy tale book, let alone no of a creature existing with in its pages!
"Perhaps you've eaten too much sweets, Naruto; I don't what the hype is about, but whatever you brats are looking for, as you can see, it's not here. So I suggest you all zip it and stay put" he ordered callously, leafing through more pages and perfectly concealing a malicious grin behind his mask.
"Awww…aren't you gonna let us do what ever the hell we want to do?" a male voice echoed from the back of the class. It was soon followed by a lot of hopeful 'yeah's and 'that's right's. But Kakashi shook his head 'no', a firm dismissing of the subject.
"Not today, brats, today I have an assignment for all of you" he smirked at this, though no one really knew. For once,he actually dropped his book, and stared at them like a predator would to a prey. The ninjas swallowed the lump building up in their throats.
One brave soldier among the mass sea of cowards (or apathetic ones, for that matter) stood up and slammed her fists on the desk, "Now what!?" she demanded, "First we got sent back to this stupid academy, and now an assignment!" it wasn't a question; it was a complaint, "What the hell?"
"Calm down, Ten-ten-chan," Kakashi began, lightly chuckling in amusement. It seems that the Weapon Mistress has began to parallel her teammate's antics, much too much for her own good. She even acquired the impatience of it; the only difference was that she was not good at bottling it (then again, neither was the prodigy).
"Don't tell me to calm, pony boy" she muttered though sat down nonetheless. She, too, saw the pony after all. She huffed and dejectedly crossed her arms over her chest, waiting for that damn assignment to be done with. How dare he waste her precious training time? And for Pete's sake, just when her ANBU staffers were finally giving her some respect (sexists are not an uncommon sight in the ANBU lairs after all).
"Well, enough of that, as for your assignment…" he paused for dramatic effects. He deliberately remained silent for five seconds. He saw his class' eyes bulging outwards (well, most of them, anyway), but what he (expected?) heard next was something he despised most.
It was the wail of Uzumaki Naruto: the number one LOUDMOUTHED ninja in the whole, wide world.
"WHAAAAAAAAT KAKASHI-SENSEIIIIII??" he stressed out his point too much. Kakashi's eyes twitched but he let it slide, anyway. Today was that 'time' and he was not letting anything—or anyone—ruin it. Like hell he would!
"Shut up, Naruto" Kakashi said menacingly though silently, "Now, see this?" he motioned for the small box he pulled out of the teacher's table. The class nodded, "This contains names of all the girls in this class. Considering you're 12 with just four girls, four guys will have to pair up with each other. Whoever is unfortunate will have to go with the same gender, got that?" he began seriously, "Alright then, as I call your name, stand up and grab a paper."
But Kakashi made a mistake of not announcing that bloodlines aren't allowed to be activated…or did he?
"Alright, first, Team 7: Uchiha!" he yelled. At the mention of the former traitor's name, Sasuke Uchiha stood up, some raven locks bouncing and the process, and nonchalantly reached for the box and pulled out a piece of paper. It was then revealed that his once ebony eyes were now a deep lotus, although it was only Kakashi who noticed this, "Hey you—"
"Haruno" he mumbled a silent 'tch' and burned the piece of paper (1). Sakura was overjoyed, though, she acted like how a mature adult would act; she simply smiled and said a silent, 'that's great' to Sasuke as he passed by her. He replied with an equally soft, 'hn' and that was the end of their discussion.
The next one was a rather somber ninja who was overly moping with the apparent "loss of chance with his "loved" one". When Kakashi hollered, "Uzumaki!" to the class, Naruto dejectedly stood up and brushed a bit of invisible dust from his pants as he staggered his way to the front. Carefully, he inserted his hand in the box and pulled out a paper.
What he saw next, though, automatically brightened up his spirits, "Hina-chan!" he bellowed for the whole world to hear. Upon hearing her name, said Hyuuga blushed furiously ten shades of red. She stammered, fidgeted, and sweated a lot. Hell, she did not know what to say!
And so when he happily made his way over to her, Hinata was barely spared from unconsciousness. Actually, she wasn't; she fainted.
Not wanting the ruckus between the lovers to continue, Kakashi rapidly called out again, "Alright, then: Team 9!" Kakashi bellowed, his voice reverberating through the hallow walls. Kiba let out a wolf whistle as Shino's bugs pranced about in front of him, apparently excited themselves. They both waited patiently, and quite anxiously, for the white-haired nin to call them, "Aburame!"
Shino stood up, hands stuffed inside his pocket, and walked forward. His bugs buzzed about around him, and it took him a couple of threatening chakras to shut them up, not really interested about the hype. He placed his hand in the box, pulled out a paper, and sighed, sullen, that he pulled out an empty paper.
"I got nothing…this is a shame. Oh yes, it is, I have to do my assignment with a guy; what a boisterous nuisance. Sigh, the world hates me; yes, the gods damn me…" he moped, miserably making his way back to his sit. It seemed that a very somber aura enveloped him, and the rest of the gang suddenly felt like he was in a wholly different—sad—universe of his own. They decided to let him be.
"Ah, shame, Shino-kun," Kakashi faked sympathy, though he could really care less, "Next, step up, Inuzuka." The teacher didn't have to finish his statement, for the dog lover was instantly up and running. He snatched a paper in the box, silently praying for some divine blessings, Please let it be Ten-ten, please let it be Ten-ten; I know Hyuuga practically owns her but to hell, she's hot! He smirked as he pulled out a piece of paper.
Though that smirk was instantly wiped off his face when he opened the folded paper and came face to face with a blank, empty, sheet. He sighed and then moped as well beside Shino. Oh how he wished he had gotten Ten-ten!
His sixth sense though told him that it was safer in Moping Land than in reality, because he honestly felt a murderous aura coming from behind him. When he turned around, he saw Neji's face, with the message practically written on his forehead: Don't. You. Dare, was what it screamed in blinding, neon lights. Kiba sighed again; oh well, at least he lives.
"Next is team 10!" Kakashi announced, giddy, "Alright, Akamichi!" Chouji, though mouth stuffed with chips, stood up and picked a piece of paper. When he pulled it out, some chips fell out of his moth,
"Ich emfchi" he said, eyeing the paper. Indeed, it was empty. There was no named whatsoever, nor any inkblots to represent the previous scenarios of hesitation to write on the white, folded piece of paper. Chouji looked up from the paper and eyed Kakashi incredulously, "Its empty" he repeated after swallowing his chips.
"Well, it can't be helped" he said, "Like I said, out of the 12 of you, you only have four girls; which means four guys will have to pair up with one another. So, when you get a blank one, it means you pair up with a guy. I don't know; pick who ever you like, though not until the rest of the guys have picked"
"Don't you think it would've been easier if you just let the girls do the picking?" Neji, who had been silently moping all this time, finally spoke. He hated when his training gets interrupted over trivial things. If this was the Godaime's idea of fun then he certainly want to do something…terrible, to say the least…to prove that this was no goddamn joke. His eyes turned into slits.
"True, but what's the fun in that?" was Kakashi's "rational" response. Though it seemed almost impossible, Neji rolled his eyes; only Ten-ten caught this little display as she knew nearly every move of his, "Well, whatever, let's move on: Nara!" he called out but received no answer as the lazy genius was fast asleep at the back row.
"I'll gechich for him" Chouji volunteered, shrugging. He reached out for the box and pulled out yet another paper. When he unfolded it, he nearly choked, "INO!" he hollered. Kiba laughed; Shikamaru with Ino? What's the worse that could happen! I mean, with this pair, just anything that would happen could be classified as humorous. Ino didn't seem to mind, though, for she just shrugged.
"Whatever..." It's better than any of them, anyway. Although I do wish it was either Neji or Sasuke-kun. Well, whatever, at least it wasn't Lee, she thought. She eyed the back seat and found her partner snoring lightly. She giggled, "Shika-kun…" she murmured silently, though Sakura, the ever gossip girl nin she was, heard this and was broke into a fit of uncontrollable giggles.
"Ino and Shika sitting on a tree: K-I-S-S-I-N-G. First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes Shika with a baby carriage" Sakura began to sing teasingly. Ino flushed beat red, especially when Tenten caught the conversation and smirked at her. That Weapon Mistress was up to always up to mischief!
"Damn it, Forehead, shut up!" Ino muttered threateningly. Sakura shrugged, nonchalant, then focused her attention on the ninja who was talking animatedly about finally being "free from all the sufferings" brought about by hyperactive teenagers, such as herself.
"Suit yourself, Ino-pig, you're just guilty" she smirked.
"Am not!"
"Is too!"
"Am not"
"Is too"
"Haruno, Yamanaka, care to join us?" Kakashi cleared his throat, capturing the attention of the two kunoichis. They both smiled sheepishly and spewed out their apologies before falling into awkward silence. Kakashi continued, "Alright, finally, our beloved upperclassmen;"—Neji and Tenten rolled their eyes—"Team Gai! Alright, Hyuuga!"
Neji concealed a small smirk then walked callously forward. He seemed to not give a damn to the world when he reached out, but all that changed when he activated his bloodline and literally scanned up and down the last remaining papers.
"Hey! No cheating!" Kakashi whispered. Neji shrugged, pulling out a piece of paper, a smirk indicating his feat. He turned off his Byakugan, just as he faced his former classmates.
"You never said anything…" was his reply, "Tenten" he held out the piece of paper for the crowd to see. From the back, Tenten blushed but then shook the thoughts out of her mind and smiled,
"That's great, Neji!" she cheered, high-fiving him when he got to her.
"And that means that Lee gets a male partner as well" Lee sulked for a while before resuming his flamboyant self. He held out two-thumbs up and flashed his sparkly white teeth.
"The power of youth shall prevail!" he shouted, then did his trademark pose, a trademark sunset behind him, a mountain with waves crashing, and trademark tears flowed like rivers from his eyes, "Who, my precious sensei, would be my partner? Who art thou, oh dear flower?" he spoke.
"Lee, don't say stuffs like that when you're talking to a guy" Kiba commented, rubbing his right ear, "It's creepy," he continued. Chouji nodded, once again stuffing spicy Tortillas in his mouth. Lee mouthed an 'o' before he sat back down and pondered on he would like to be partners with, "I'm going with Shino" Kiba announced before the Green Beast had a chance to proclaim his partner.
"Guess this means I'm stuck with you" Chouji muttered, not really caring who he works with as long as he gets his fair share (maybe a tad bit past fair) of food. He shrugged then sat next to Lee, who immediately began his rants on 'the power of youth'.
"Alright class, now that's done and over with;"—he stole a glance at Shino, who was still sulking—"I'll like to announce next your assignment. Now this assignment may be a bit out of hand but trust me, it's classified as an A-rank with a sparkling pay" he said happily.
Upon hearing about the pay, Tenten's eyes tweaked with excitement; her pupils now replaced with shining dollar signs; how the brunette loved money! "Oooh" was her childish comment. Again, for the third time that day, Neji rolled his eyes, "Let's hear it, then!" out of them all, she was the most determined to earn much, mainly because she had no family to back her up.
"Well, it's—technically—an easy job. But since you guys have no experience whatsoever, this might be hard thing"
"Oh, cut to the chase already!" Naruto, who had been silent all this time because he was fanning poor Hinata, complained, a vein popping out. Hinata was, finally, awake, though her eyes still held the haze of slumber.
"Alright, alright; your assignments would be: baby sitting"
Oh how hell broke loose that day…
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Me: Lolz. This was a fun prologue to write.
Tsubasa: I can tell…and, what the heck am I doing here?
Me: Ooh, you're not cussing, I see. Well, Misaki has done her charms!
Tsubasa: Just answer the question, stupid brat
Me: You got lonely, I kidnapped you, and dragged you here. There, you happy?
Tsubasa: -sulks- I miss Misaki…I want to go home…and, I can't believe I'm saying this, I want to go back to the academy! Uwaaaaa!!!!
Me: If they review, I'll assure your safety.
Tsubasa: I know I don't belong to this anime but PLEASE REVIEWWWWW T_T
Me: Boy, you're desperate.