Finishing What I Started

by Soldier's Girl 27

After Clare's parent's constant fighting and a terrible encounter with Fitz, Clare starts to question her way out. She turns to self harm and hides her feelings in her diary. When Clare is pushed to far, who will be able to catch her?

1. Chapter 1

Finishing What I started

I was sitting in my room listening to Coming Back Around Again by: Infinite Playlist trying to put myself in a better place. "While your dreaming I'm outside digging up the ones I missed." I thought of the happy times, when we would go on adventures to the park. I would let my bare feet run in the grass as the warm sun hovered on my back and shined brightly to mimic my happiness. My parents exchanged happy looks and loving kisses and thought how life couldn't get any more perfect. My dream was harshly interrupted by the screaming of my parents. "Randall, When has work ever become more important than your family!", she bellowed as I could almost feel the warm tears flood down her face leaving a muddy river of mascara. "The same time church started becoming more important than me!" He growled fiercely. She then threw the hand blown glass plate he had given her for their 5th anniversary at him which shattered , leaving their family's fate scattered on the floor with the glass. Clare instantly burst into tears and soon soothed herself to calmness. She thought to herself, " Crying never helped anything, just made things worse". And then from that moment on, she decided to take matters into her own hands.

She went to the bathroom and opened up the cabinet where all of her cosmetics were. She searched around and then found what she was looking for. The blade sparkled as the light hit the edge of the metal. She closed the cabinet, rolled up her sleeves and pressed the blade onto her forearm. As soon as she did that, she had an instant flash back to Darcy's limp body laying on the hospital bed with a thick white bandage wrapped around her arms. She read about people cutting themselves , but never thought of it happening to her sister. She always thought Darcy was so perfect but yet again she thought her mom and dad were too. So with that thought, she sliced the blade into her skin, leaving blood droplets pricking up above the cut flowing down her arm. She then cried for herself. She cut herself again. For her parents fighting. Another time for Darcy being raped. Again for Eli never being able to love her without regret. And for Adam who may never find someone that will except him. How could people that barely knew each other be so connected by lines of sadness. And then Clare felt something. Not regret. Not sadness. But power.