Dis-of-the-claiming: I don't own Naruto.
Way Away
The first time was an accident.
Or at least he thinks of it that way.
I don't...
I stood at my usual spot. The place where I went whenever I wasn't away on a mission or doing any other important stuff. The real reason for my lateness, but a reason I would never admit. The place that brought back all the painful memories as clear as if it had happened yesterday. Memories that I did not want to remember, yet would not let go off.
I heard footsteps approaching from behind me. I didn't turn around though. I knew who it was. I could sense him even though he was trying his best to hide his presence.
"Iruka," I said loud enough for the man to hear.
I heard him sigh. He walked towards me, stopping when he reached my side. He hesitated then said, "Instead of making up excuses Kakashi, why don't you just admit the real reason why you're always late?"
I said nothing. I knew he didn't really expect me to anyway. Instead I turned around and began to walk away.
"Wait!" he yelled and I felt his hand on my shoulder. "Please," he added more softly. I stayed like that a moment before finally turning around.
"Yes?" I muttered.
"Oh umm well…" he quickly removed his hand from my shoulder and I noticed a small blush begin to creep up his tanned cheeks. "Nothing really I guess."
I started to turn around again, but was stopped yet again by him yelling, "No wait!" He started towards me attending to stop me when his foot stumbled awkwardly on the ground. He tripped flying head first towards me. Out of instinct I caught him, his whole body pressing against mine, his lips pressed firmly to mine through my mask. He pulled away immediately his face a deep shade of red. Luckily for me I had a mask to cover mine. "I'm sorry!" he yelled. "I-I tripped!" He turned away, walking as fast as he could without actually running.
Now it was my turn. "Iruka wait!" But of course he didn't stop. I touched my fingers to my lips. It had been through my mask... but still... it was a kiss.
The second time was on purpose
Short, sweet and fulfilling.
It was two weeks after the 'accident' with Iruka and he was doing a pretty damn good job of avoiding me. Every time I thought I saw a glimpse of him, he would disappear as quickly as he came. I knew I had to find a way to talk to him, to work things out, but I just couldn't figure out how. Then it came to me in the lovely form of Tsunade.
"Kakashi, I have a mission for you," Tsunade said to me from behind her desk.
"A mission?" I repeated.
"Yes a mission," she said, handing me a scroll. "The instructions for your mission are inside that scroll."
I unwound the scroll, my eyes glancing over the contents. An escort mission... interesting. Tsunade cleared her throat, "As you can see your mission is to escort our client Yamato to the Land of Waves. It shouldn't really be that dangerous but just in case I've ordered someone to go with you. He should be here-" there was a knock on the door, "right now, I guess."
I watched amazed as Iruka entered the room. He froze upon seeing me. I couldn't believe my luck, I was about to be sent away on a mission with Iruka. He couldn't avoid me now. "As I was saying Iruka, you leave tomorrow morning with Kakashi on an escort mission to the land of waves."
"T-Tomorrow... with K-Kakashi," he practically whimpered.
"Is there a problem with that Iruka," Tsunade said coldly.
"Nope, of course not," he yelped.
Tomorrow came slowly for me. I lay awake for hours just thinking. Never had it occurred to me before that I could actually like Iruka as more then a friend. Ever since our 'kiss' I couldn't stop thinking about him. I craved him. I wanted more. This time without a mask to interfere. I wanted his body and his lips on mine. But I didn't want to hurt him. I knew he wasn't ready for anything like that. Lust or love it didn't really matter, but I knew if I went up to him and did anything too risky he'd probably never forgive me. Just our 'accidental kiss' had caused him to avoid me completely.
Morning finally came and our mission began. Our client Yamato was quite an ass. He refused to exchange any words and would barely even look at us. Not that I really cared, I was too preoccupied. I knew it wasn't good to let my mind wander so far from the mission but damn, all I could think about was Iruka. I had to talk to him alone now. My first chance came after we were done setting up camp for the night.
"Yamato," I said loudly, "I'm just going to have a word with Iruka over there. We'll be back in a few minutes." He grunted. Well I guess that was as good as yes.
I looked at Iruka. I knew he didn't really want to come with me, his eyes refused to meet mine. I grabbed him by the arm and began to half drag him into the woods. I stopped about one hundred meters from camp and pressed him against a tree to keep him from running. "Iruka listen, we need to talk." His eyes still refused to meet mine.
"Kakashi, I swear it was an accident. I-I tripped, I swear I did," he said softly. I tilted his chin up to make his gaze meet mine. His eyes were so full of fear that I nearly laughed. I decided to toy with him.
"You know Iruka, I think you did it on purpose."
"No, no really I didn't," he whimpered.
I smirked beneath my mask. "I don't think I believe you. Admit it, you meant to kiss me."
He squirmed beneath me but he couldn't run because I still had him pinned to the tree. "N-No. I said I'm s-sorry. What more am I supposed to do?"
Well that was easy. I could definitely answer that one for him. "You're supposed to do this." Before he could say anything else I pulled down my mask pressed my lips firmly to his. My tongue stroked his bottom lip and he relaxed into the kiss. But as quick as it started he pulled away panting slightly.
"Kakashi I can't."
"Why not?" I asked.
"Because... because... " I could see him searching for an answer he didn't know.
"Because we're both guys," I finished for him.
"No!" he said quickly. "It's not that. I really don't care about that. It's just... It's just I'm not really sure about this."
"Sure about what exactly?" I asked. Damn it. Why did Iruka have to make things so difficult? I still had him pinned to the tree. I loosened my grip allowing him to walk away but he didn't move. He seemed to need the tree to keep him steady.
"About everything. About you kissing me. Because it feels so right, yet my mind screams no. I'm just so confused." I suddenly felt sorry for the man. It was my fault he was so confused and I had probably just made it worse.
"Iruka I'm-" but I was cut off by a shout in the distance and a loud bang. I cursed. Yamato, he was being attacked. I had forgotten all about him.
The third time was the end
I gasped in pain falling to my knees. How could I have been so stupid. I had been so busy worrying about Iruka getting killed by the three Sound ninjas that had ambushed us that Yamato now lay dead on the ground. I wasn't doing much better. In my desperate attempt to save the man I had lunged in front of a sound ninja's katana and taken the blow.
I suddenly became painfully aware of how hard it was to breathe. It felt as though my lungs had stopped working, each shaky breath was forced and it took all my effort just to keep breathing. I knew I was dying and I wasn't ashamed to admit that I was scared. Fear seemed to flood through every fibre off my body. Never before had I been so afraid. Suddenly my eyes connected with Iruka's as he stood panting beside the dead sound ninja and I saw all the color leave the man's face.
Suddenly everything began to move in slow motion. It was as if time itself had stopped the moment my eyes connected with his. In an instant he was by my side. I could see the fear in his eyes and I was painfully reminded that I was going to die. Die! Death! The words seemed so strange to my mind. Once I was dead I'd be gone. Gone forever. And I wondered if anyone would really care if I died. I knew Naruto and Sakura would. But most of all would Iruka?
"Kakashi…" Iruka choked out, kneeling down by my side.
"Iruka... I'm scared," I admitted. I found it hard to talk and every breath was harder then the last.
"I know," he said, his voice sounded strangely high pitched to my ears.
"I don't... want to... die," I muttered. I knew I sounded childish, but I didn't care. It was the truth.
"It'll be okay." He removed my mask, stroking my cheek gently. "It'll be okay." He sounded like he was trying to convince himself more then me. I concentrated on my breathing, in... out... in... out.
"Iruka I..." I had to tell him. Before I died I had to tell him. Tell him that I loved him. I had to get it out. "I... I..." I couldn't make my mouth work and I was getting so cold. I had to concentrate on breathing. In... out... in... out... "I Lo-" Why couldn't I say it, I had to make him understand.
"Shhhh," he said. "I understand." My vision was fading now. Iruka's fear drenched face was now beginning to blur. I felt hot tears drip down on my face and lips press softly against mine. Iruka's lips. All the fear suddenly vanished and was replaced by sheer joy. Could it mean that he felt the same way too, did he love me after all? But then I reminded myself that it didn't matter, I was dying, I'd never see the man again and I realized again just how much I didn't want to die. Then just before I slipped off into eternal unconsciousness I could have sworn I heard Iruka mutter, "I love you too." That one thought made me happy. Then all was gone.
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Well I'm done. I'm sorry if this story was too cliché. But clichés are only clichés because they're true. I'm not sure if this was any good or not, I was kinda rushed. I'm so happy to finally post something after 4 months of writing nothing because my internet was down. And I'm lazy :)
So please review. It means a lot to me. Tell me what you think.