New DoomRater Dis, a legend of zelda fanfic

[This dis is a simple rewording of Christina Augilera's "Real Slim Shady" dis. And yes, I'm dissing myself for no reason at all!]

May I have your attention please?

Will the real DoomRater please shut up?

I repeat, will the real DoomRater please shut up?

We're gonna have a problem here

Y'all act like you've never seen a writer before

His rhymes before

Punk kid trying to be hardcore

But Alfred Hoppy comes back worse than before

Whining into the microphone

Makin a snore

It the return of the... oh wait, no way, you're a fool

You didn't pay money to print this out, did you?

And Post Rapture did... everything, you idiots

Without Post, speakboy, you're as good as dead

The world's had enough of DoomRater

Jigga jigga, even his mom says he sounds like Darth Vader

Look at him, walking around

Living off Post, acting so cool

(but he's really kind of weak, though)

Little twip blast me on his new story

Why? Cause I told him to go fish, he he

As for the question of what was fun,

Was it more Christy or Juliet Singleton?

I'm sorry, Doomy, but

This is gonna hurt

They both came closer than you ever will, jerk

Your writing's on my nerves

You're kinda lucky cause you got more fame than you deserve

That is the message I deliver to little kids

You can become famous and never know what talent is

Of course they're gonna love you

Of course they will

You're like a service that doesn't collect bills

You're nothing but a product

A patch to be downloaded

You know in a year you won't even have any folds

But you're wrong about dead animals and cannibals

And someday you'll start dating Saria and date real people

And there's just a handful of people just like me,

That think like me,

That all can see

That DoomRater is

Just a boy dealing with puberty

So if you agree

Sing louder with me

You're DoomRater

Yes, you're the real DoomRater

You sound like Darth Vader

You play like Tomb Raider