You can always go back
Summary: Kate decides to come back and look for Jack, after leaving him behind once they were rescued. But it's been almost 4 years and he's certainly moved on. Now she's only a woman he once knew. Yet she wants him back, and she's willing to play dirty, if that's what it takes. For Jate lovers, placed after flash forward.
Okay people, I'm dying here. That season finale, I can't get over it to this day. That "future", I mean, Jack a junkie alcoholic? Kate not with him? That's so ed up! So, in order to not killing myself, I had to create an alternate reality and came up with this. You better like it and give me reviews, remember I'm border-line suicidal :P
Chapter 1 and 2 already up. I'll post every Wednesday, but If you like another day, let me know please. Enjoy...
Chapter 1
Her hands were all sweaty. She had been waiting for almost 4 hours now, but that wasn't what kept her anxious. It was seeing him again what made her heart beat up faster. Would he like seeing her again? He has to… After all, he loved her, didn't he? At least he used to, or so he said.
Finally he was out of the OR, after an endless surgery. He was kind of tired, but pleased. Everything had turned out well. He only had to drop by his office to pick up some medical journals and he'd be ready to go home. He walked on by the Nurses' Station.
— Dr. Shephard…
— Janette…
— There's a lady waiting for you…
— A lady? —he asked raising an eyebrow.
— She says she's a long time friend. I asked her to come back tomorrow, since she didn't make an appointment and you were in surgery, but she insisted on staying. She's waiting outside your office.
— Fine. Thanks… —he said shrugging.
As he walked the hallway, he thought it sure was that friend his mother had told him about, the one who wanted to see him since the week before because of a back ache. Damn it… He hoped it wouldn't take long.
When he got to his office, he saw her sitting on the couch outside. She was looking down, playing with her hands. She was wearing dark blue jeans, a white shirt and a brown jacket. Her messy chocolate curls fell on her shoulders. A huge backpack was resting beside her on the floor. He couldn't believe she was there, she was the last person he expected to see. Yet he found himself pleasantly surprised.
— Hey… —he said standing in front of her.
As she looked up, she saw an open smile on his face. She felt nervous, but her face illuminated. Seeing him again was just the best thing that had happened to her in a long time. — Hey… —she managed with a shy smile, as she stood up. He looked skinnier, his hair was longer and his face was perfectly shaved. She had never seen him that neat, or at least she didn't remember.
He wasn't even the shadow of the mess he was the last time she'd seen him at the outskirts of LAX. He was wearing black trousers and a light gray shirt. He looked younger and, God, was he handsome. He had aged beautifully. He had the same intense look in those big hazel eyes, but he looked different, and that was what disconcerted her the most. It was the first time since she'd met him that he actually looked that way. He looked happy. Or was he just happy of seeing her?
She stepped forward. She wanted to give him a hug. He guessed her intention, but hesitated. Finally he opened his arms and held her. She felt her legs trembling. She gave into his embrace, standing on her tiptoes. Boy, he was tall, she had forgotten. She breathed deeply on his shoulder. He smelled so nice… Then he broke the embrace quickly.
— What are you doing here? —he asked curious, expectant and kind of surprised.
— I… I was in the neighborhood, you know, and I thought of saying hi…
— Well, hi… —he said and then smirked. — Come on in… —he said opening the door and letting her into his office.
She looked around. — This is a nice office… I guess you're doing fine, huh?
He laughed shortly. — I try… —he replied as he leaned on his desk, still waiting for her to say something. He hadn't seen her in almost 4 years, so she sure wanted something, especially if she had come from God knows where to look for him. He knew her quite well after all. — How'd you find me?
— By asking. You're quite famous…
He laughed again. — Right…
She started feeling less tense. He didn't hate her after all, that was evident. Yet she knew she had to make a point anytime soon, especially because he was kind of waiting. — Uh… well, I was thinking that… um… maybe if you're done now, I can buy you dinner to catch up, you know, see how we're doing?
He was definitely puzzled. The five seconds he took to answer were awful for her. Please, don't say "no", don't have someone waiting for you… Then he spoke. — Sure, why not? —he replied with a smile. Then he took the medical journals and his jacket. — I'm ready…
— Good…
He carried her backpack for her. She was positive he would ask why she was carrying such a bag, but he didn't say a word. They walked to the exit. — So, is this hospital better than the other one?
He thought about it. — Um… I don't think so. St. Sebastian's still the best hospital in the city, but this is quite a competitor…
— At least you have a job again… Did I just say that?! Damn it!
— Uh… yeah… —he said frowning, almost putting a face.
— I mean…
He cut her off. — So, you're taking your car or you want to go on mine?
— I don't have a car… now…
— Oh, fine then…
They headed to the parking lot to find his car. He was definitely back on track, it was evident. He was dressing nice and had a nice office and a nice car. She felt relieved. She took too long to come back, she knew, but finally she was there with him again. He opened the door for her. The two seconds she got closer to him to get in the car made her shiver. He closed the door and got in as well, then drove away.
— What you feel like? —he asked.
— Uh, I don't know. Something simple…
— Okay…
They went to a diner nearby. She ordered a salad and he had steak. He wasn't saying much. After all, what was left to say between them? That saddened her. Where to start? From the beginning, I guess… She was two seconds away from speaking when he said with a short smile: — It's good to see you, Kate…
— It's good to see you too… —she replied with a bright shy smile, looking down.
— What brings you here? —he asked curious.
— Well, you know, Iowa just got old… Never was the place for me…
— So you were in Iowa…
— Yeah…
— You're staying long? —he asked, regarding the bag she was carrying around.
— Yeah…
— How is he? —he asked openly and, yes, naturally.
She sighed and looked down, then placed a streak of her hair behind her ear. — I don't know… I'm not… We're not together anymore…
He opened his eyes wider. Unbelievable. — What happened? —he asked concerned.
She stayed quiet for a moment. She couldn't tell him the truth yet. — It was a mistake, the whole thing… it was never meant to happen…
— I… I'm sorry… —he managed, still shocked.
— Well, I'm not… —she replied frankly, raising her eyebrows and shrugging.
— Where you're staying?
— Uh… I'll just get a room somewhere… I've got to find a job, a place to live… Start over… —she said, looking down again.
He felt sad for her. He knew what it was like to go through a divorce. He wanted to help her, but didn't know how. But then it hit him. He knew what she wanted, he knew her like his own palm after all. — You can stay at my place, if you want… —she raised her eyes to meet his, surprised— I mean, if you don't find it inappropriate or anything… —he corrected.
She giggled inside. That was exactly what she was expecting from him. Yet she played naïve. — You mean it?
— You know I do… —he replied, giving her an "I so don't buy your act" look.
— It'll be just for a few days, I promise. Just 'til I get a place…
— Sure…
He took care of the check, in spite she insisted it was on her. They left the diner and headed to Jack's place. He drove through a very nice L.A. neighborhood. That didn't surprise her at all. Jack had always been wealthy. Not only because he'd made good money with his own doctor career, but also he had inherited his father's money. She didn't know what it was like to be rich. What about his mom? Was she still alive? Or had he inherited her money as well? — Your mom, how is she?
— She's fine. —he replied briefly.
— You used to be a better conversation holder… —she stated sarcastically, regarding his scarce words.
— I used to be a lot of things Kate… But I've changed…
They got to a fancy condo tower. He pulled the car into the garage after greeting the doorman. Then they got in the elevator and he pressed the 8th floor button. Once there he walked to the fourth door and used his keys to open it. He looked at her and nodded, inviting her in. The place was breathtaking.
— Wow… You have a beautiful home, Jack.
— Thanks… —he said with a short smile, placing her backpack on the floor.
— How long you've been living here?
— Uh… a couple of years, I think… —he said frowning, trying to remember the exact date he moved in.
At the end of the large room, there was a huge floor-to-roof window and a glass door that left to a terrace. She approached and opened the blinds. — Man! You have one hell of a view…
He didn't say anything and kept watching her as she wandered the apartment, leaning on a wall, his arms crossed in front of his chest. The place was furnished and decorated with a simple style. He had great taste, she thought. It was cozy and it felt peaceful, as peaceful as she was perceiving him. He had some plants and some paintings on the walls. He also had a fireplace. A photo frame on the mantelpiece called her attention.
She took it and opened her eyes wider when she saw who was in the picture. — Is this Aaron?
— Yeah…
— Oh my God! He's so big! How old is he now?
— Almost 7…
— And Claire! She looks so different, she's a brunette now? —she asked in disbelief.
— She dyes her hair. She says we look more alike that way…—he said, looking down and shaking his head.
— So you keep in touch, huh?
He met her eyes and his look hardened. — They're my family…
She noticed a trace of resentment in his voice and placed the picture back on the mantelpiece. — I see… —she said, glancing at the frame next to it, which had a picture of his mother. — Is that your mom? —he nodded— You kind of look like her…
— That's what they say… —he replied flatly.
— You don't have a lot of pictures around…
— I'm not that into pictures… I just have the ones that really mean something to me…
She remained quiet. That comment felt like a needle piercing her heart. Not only because obviously there was no picture of her, but also because he seemed to care about so little now… Yet she felt relieved there was no picture of a "she" around. That gave her hope. After all, that was the reason she was there, to get her picture on that mantelpiece for good. — I'm glad you and Claire get along…
— She's almost everything I have… —he replied immediately, almost to himself.
She didn't want the moment to get awkward, to begin asking questions, let alone being asked questions. — So, where can I stay?
He nodded. — This way…
He leaded her to a big nice room. It had its own bathroom, a big bed and a huge closet. It seemed girly and that concerned her. — Whose room is this? —she asked flatly.
— It was Claire's… —she gave him a questioning look. — She moved to my mom's house. She watches Aaron now that Claire's working again…
She was surprised. — They get along?
— Yeah. There are days I think mom likes her better than me… —he said smiling. — Anyway —he said getting in the room and opening the closet— you must find here everything to make yourself comfortable… uh… towels, sheets… But if there's something else you need, let me know, okay?
She smiled widely at him. He was still caring and kind, in spite of the tremendous effort he was making to keep it cool and play indifferent. — Thank you, Jack, for everything…
He nodded and smiled. — Sure… night, Kate…
— Night…
He walked away and she closed the door once he left. She sat on the bed and looked around. She couldn't believe it. Getting in Jack's house had just been too easy. She wasn't expecting that, but she felt relieved and happy. That meant he stilled loved her, he still wanted her in his life. Otherwise, she wouldn't be sleeping just two doors away from him. She smiled to herself and then went to the shower.