A/N: Thank you for clicking on this story and giving it a chance. I just wanted to say a few things before letting you get started on reading "Little do you know". First thing is that I am a college student so I'm not sure how regular my updates will be but I promise not to abandon this story. Secondly, I had started writing it a few years ago, so I have to make a few changes towards some characters, particularly Finn. At first it was a total bashing of Finn and some of Mr. Shue, but since his timely passing it doesn't seem fair to drag him through the mud, well at least not to much. So, with that said I'm going to tone down the bashing on Finn to a more moderate understanding of his character. Well, with that said I hope you like it! One final note, all mistakes are my own, I don't have a Beta reader, so I apologize in advance for any mistakes you might find.
Quinn Fabray leaned heavily against her red locker in the quickly emptying hallway of McKinley high school. The last few weeks since finding out that her first choice of rebellion had turned into a nine-month nightmare had been exhausting. She wondered if every pregnant teenager's life was as dramatic as her own. Between her psycho cheerleading coach, dim-witted boyfriend, Spanish teachers baby-obsessed wife, and the true baby daddy following her around at what he thinks is a discreet pace was becoming too much. If things hadn't been bad enough, her dim-witted thought to be baby-daddy had decided to sing to her about commitment and the baby in her dining room. She pleaded him to stop, fear that her Christian strict, over-zealous parents would hear but of course, he wouldn't listen. And, just as she predicted her father came storming into the room, red-faced and blistered his frustration with the heavy breath of liquor burning his words until they stung deep in Quinn's heart. She would be the first to admit her home life wasn't ideal, her parents drank more than was healthy for any grown adult on a good day. Both were obsessed with the image they played for the tiny mass of Lima Ohio. While ignoring the 'little people' that tried to emulate them, when they were just waiting for the shoe to drop, and the Fabray family would be seen as normal. Much like the rest of the small town hicks that lived around them. It hadn't happened in the thirteen years Quinn and her family had lived in Lima, at least not until Quinn made that choice to trust the man-whore of McKinley. But her parents were quick to fix it by kicking her to the curb with thirty minutes to pack a bag. Tears streaming down her cheeks and eyes pleading out the front door without a second look. That had been a week ago. Since then she was living in the basement of her dim-witted boyfriend Finn Hudson's house, sleeping on a pull out sofa surrounded by boxes and junk from the years passed. She knew it was the least the boy could do for getting her kicked out. Though she was lying through her teeth about him being the father to the parasitic being living in her stomach. She still couldn't get up the nerve to speak civilly to the boy.
At the time, she thought that if she had to have this child and spend the rest of her life living in this small crap town as a Lima loser. Then at least she would do it with a boy that could be a good father. Or good provider much like her father, but maybe with less alcohol. But now, two weeks since she told him about the baby and she was already regretting it. Maybe that was why she considered giving it up to Mrs. Shuester. Crazy as the woman was, she knew that Mr. Shue would make a good father. If he could manage the glee club with so many different personalities fighting for attention all the time, then he had to have the patience and understanding of a saint.. right? Right?
Quinn sighed, it was to much to think about on a Friday. School had ended five minutes ago, and a quick kiss to the cheek with a mumbled something about football practice was all she got from Finn when he appeared just after the bell. She had been hoping to talk him into taking her back to his home so she could sleep. Maybe dream of a simpler time in her life when all her worries were about Cheerios practice, homework and pleasing her parents with her wonderful grades, perfect looks, and relationship. Instead, she would have to sit in the stands and watch the boy she was supposed to love fumble the ball across the football field. For a couple of hours before his sweaty lumbering self would come up to her with the usual dopey grin and excited smile. It was sickening, what was worse was knowing that she was struggling to hold his attention while that short dwarf Berry was sniffing around him like some hound. Quinn shook her head quickly, the last thing she needed was to be thinking about the annoying girl with a serious superiority complex that needed a well to do beat down, preferably with a large stick.
Taking another breath, she shouldered the heavy messenger bag on her right shoulder and wondered towards the doors. Maybe if she were lucky Finn would do something particularly stupid and get hurt. Nothing major but just enough to get him out of practice so she could go hole herself up in her tiny room and let the tears she had been holding in for the last few hours set free. She had just pushed open the doors to the school, staring at the faded gray assault of the parking lot, a few rusted and old cars sat in the lot mixed with teacher and student cars. Most were those in extra-curricular activities that Quinn didn't pay much attention too. If you asked she couldn't even tell you if they had such a thing as a drama club, chess club, hell she couldn't even tell you if they had a softball, team. Though it was something she wondered, with house possessive Coach Sylvester has been about the Cheerios budget, if the school even had any other activities besides Cheerleading, Hockey, Football, and Basketball. She only knew about Basketball because Finn wouldn't shut up about the season starting in a few more months and wanting to be captain this year. Like she saw THAT happening. Unlike the football team, the basketball team was good. Not nearly as good as the Cheerios but they had won enough games that they weren't an embarrassment to the school, though the same couldn't be said for the Hockey or Football teams.
She took a soft step out onto the steps towards the lot when she stopped, left hand raised above her eyes to block out the harsh sun while she stared with wide, hazel eyes at the familiar sleek silver Mercedes and the tall figure leaning against it staring back at her.
Russell Fabray was not a towering man though he was rather tall standing a good 6'4, he knew he wasn't the tallest man in Lima. If James Berry was any indication, the tall, sleek African-American man was a towering 6''9, with arms the size of tree trunks and hands as big as Russells head. But though he wasn't the tallest, and maybe not the fittest if the soft pouch of stomach that rested against his faded blue jeans was any indication. He had found them resting in the far back of his closet with the gray T-shirt he wore over said pouch. He hadn't seen either in years though it was probably even longer since he had even worn jeans and just a shirt. He was more an expensive suit and tie type, or at least his job required it of him. When at home it was slacks and crisp pressed button down shirts or sweaters.
Ideally in the hot setting sun, leaning against his shiny, expensive car he wondered when it had happened. When he turned into his father. Probably long before he mistakenly tossed out his youngest for making a stupid mistake, but closer to the moment his whole world changed, when he changed, and when he began to drink heavily. It had been a full week since Russell had tossed his sweet Lucy from the front door with her pathetic baby-daddy without a second look.
It had been Six days since his wife, sober for the first time in years laid into him like the devil himself for doing so.
It had been Five since Russell sat in his study and cried for the first time in thirteen years.
Four since he tossed out every bottle of liquor accept one, a twenty-year-old scotch that sat unopened in the deepest recesses of his desk. Always in view as a reminder of the giver but never opened.. just taunting him for what he lost and who he had become.
Three days since that twenty-something tattoo artist came into his office looking for legal help and practically threw herself at him.
Two since he prayed for guidance in finding himself again, and one.. one day since the resolve of the old Russell returned. The man he used to be, the man who loved his daughters like they were the moon and sun. Who spun his wife in the kitchen to dance while dinner burned on the stove. The man who loved to trade in those stuffy suits for a good pair of jeans and a tool belt while he built the most amazing tree house in the world because little Franny wanted one.
Russell hadn't felt like himself in years, and he hated himself for what he had done not just to his children, but his dear wife, Judy. After tossing out every bit of liquor he could find, turning down the offer of an affair and escape from his troubles. Praying for guidance instead of just for show at that snooty church he attended just outside of Lima with his family. And pulling off the shell of a man he had become Russell sat down with his wife and talked for the first time in years. They spoke all through the night till the wee hours where they fell into each others arms, cuddling in bed and crying for who they had become, and what they had done. When he woke that morning, he called into the office and canceled his meetings and appointments. He dug through his closet and pulled out his favorite jeans and shirt, found an old pair of sneakers and set out to do what he should of done six days ago.. Russell Fabray was going to get his daughter back.
Staring at a weirdly dressed Russell Fabray leaning casually against his car with a pair of sunglasses resting above his head in the shaggy set of blonde hair usually gelled back into perfection on his head wasn't enough to stop the usual reaction Quinn had to seeing her father. Immediately her shoulders set, back straight and she waited with her eyes resting just over his shoulder for the criticism, critic, or half-hearted comment about her just as she had for as long as she could remember. In the back of her mind, she wanted to rage, scream and curse the man for daring to show up at her school, her kingdom after what he did to her. Her heart pleaded and bled for him to run up and hug her, tell her everything would be ok, and he would fix it and make everything right again. It was conflicting and complicated to be Quinn Fabray, that was probably why instead of crying for forgiveness, glaring at her father until he melted back into his car and disappeared in the afternoon air, she just stood completely still and waited for it to all be over.
Slowly, Russell moved from his car and walked cautiously up towards his daughter, he could see her body set straight and perfect posture like he had drilled into her since she was little. It broke his already shattering heart just a little more. Shifting slightly he held out his hand to her but pulled back at the last minute, suddenly feeling awkward and unsure of himself. Looking back at him wasn't his little Lucy, it was an angry, scared shell of the girl that use to be his baby girl.
"Lucy, I-" He sighed, shaking his head and turned his eyes up to the sky for a moment though pleading for guidance in his moment.
"Daddy"
It was said with a neutral voice, but damn if it didn't feel good to hear that word again. Russell resolved himself with a deep breath and turned his eyes on his daughter, for the first time they weren't critical, angry, red-rimmed from to much whiskey or even judgmental, they were loving, guilty, and full of anguish that his daughters mask cracked if only for a moment but it was enough, the set widening of her eyes in surprise was enough for Russell to know that he had a chance, it was small, but he would take it.
"I want to show you something Lucy, please."
He held out his hand again, his lips curled in an almost self-deprecating smile as he watched his daughter stare between him, his hand and his car. He watched for almost a full two minutes as she warred with herself on what to do before finally, tentatively she pressed her delicate hand into his strong ones. Russell let out all the breath from his lungs and smiled, squeezing her fingers gently he guided his wayward daughter towards his car and prepared for what he knew would be the hardest thing he had ever done. Russell Fabray was going to open up to his daughter.
The drive out of town only lasted ten minutes from the school parking lot, like a silent reminder at how small Lima really was. Neither blonde spoke as Russell drove through the two lane back road of farm land towards their destination. Shifting his eyes towards the right he could see the worried look on his baby girl's face, her fingers twitched with the white sleeves of her cardigan in her lap. Her eyes were scanning their surroundings with a conflicted expression of fear, and curiosity burning behind the well-placed mask of uninterest. He knew that mask; he should, he was the one who taught how to use it. How a Fabray didn't show emotion, how it was weak and unneeded for someone as high classed as them. Another fifteen minutes had passed before he saw their destination in the distance, turning on the blinker, why he wasn't sure.. there hadn't been a car behind them for miles. He turned right and pulled into a small parking lot just in front of a wide cemetery. Turing his eyes to his little girl he saw the confusion and relief when her shoulders sagged. He knew why though it hurt to know she would think of him in such a way, though he couldn't blame her. After kicking her out into the cold, he drunk himself stupid in his study and the thought of abortion had passed his racing thoughts more then once that night.
Silently he stepped from the car and opened the door for his quiet child. Holding out a hand he helped her step from the car, masked his hurt look with a small guilty smile when she took it only to pull away once she stood beside him. He shut the door quietly, absent-mindedly pressed the remote lock in his hand and steadied his breath before stepping into the cemetery. With his eyes trained forward he only knew Quinn was following by the soft touch of her feet on the gravel trail under them. Slightly two steps behind she trailed him for a few minutes before he veered off course into the grass and walked amongst the tombstones. Some he recognized, others not. It had been ten long years since he followed this familiar path and still it was ingrained into his mind like a scar that wouldn't fade. Slowly he walked till the object of his fears and pain came into sight and he stepped forward towards three perfectly set slabs of stone sticking four feet from the ground. Each of them a black marble stone with white words ingraved across the front, from left to right was the last resting place of his Father, Mother, and Brother.
Russell gave his head a soft bow while he waited for Quinn to stand beside him on his right, staring at the three stones in front of them. A few seconds had passed before she broke the silence with a soft whisper.
"Louis Quincey Fabray, who is he?"
Russell sunk to his knees, the weight of her question pressed on his chest like a heavy stone he couldn't lift if he tried. Slowly he pulled his legs out from under him and sat with the burning sting of oncoming tears building behind his soft blue eyes. He didn't see Quinn settle beside him in the grass, watching him cautiously, or how her hands fiddled with a few overgrown blades of grass by her knees. His eyes stuck on the name. He swallowed twice before he felt he could speak into the deafening silence that built around them from such a simple question that came with a complicated answer.
"Your uncle, my big brother."
He sighed softly, reminding himself for the hundredth time why he brought Quinn to this place, why he hadn't been here in ten years. Why he needed to do this, for her and him. "Louis was, he- He was nine years older than me. He was outgoing, fearless and protective. No matter what, no one messed with Louis Quincey Fabray."
Russell gave a wistful smile in the distance, remembering a short, chubby bully that tried to take his lunch money once outside of the school house. His brother appeared out of thin air and put the boy in his place, no one picked on Russell after that. He looked up to his big brother like he was a superhero. Even when they were older he was still Russells rock, his conscious and his guide through the crazy journey that was life.
"I was three.."
Russell turned at the sound of Quinns voice, giving her a look. "When he died, I was three. I, I don't remember him" She furrowed her brow, struggling to remember anything from before moving to Lima, but she couldn't. He nodded slowly, turning back to the stone.
"Yes, you had just turned three. He gave you your name you know. Lucy Quinn Fabray." Russell smiled softly; a little chuckle left his lips when he did.
"Your mother and I, we, we weren't expecting you. It was a surprise, a happy one but a surprise all the same. When she found out she was pregnant again, we decided to be surprised with what we would have. So, three hours after she gave birth to you, I sat in her hospital room, Franny beside me with you held tightly in my arms. We had been going back and forth for almost an hour on names."
He turned to his daughter, seeing the rapture of attention he was giving him. He turned back to the headstone and laughed a little harder this time. "Your mother wanted to name you Julia, Franny wanted to trade you in for something less pale, and me, well I was just thankful that you were there. That I could finally hold you in my arms."
He smiled again, ignoring the annoyed huff from his daughter about her sisters dislike for her from birth. "Your uncle Russell came bursting through the door with the biggest smile on his face, arms full of every stuffed animal he could find at the gift shop and at least ten different pink balloons. You see, you were born so early in the morning I had forgotten to call him till afterward, all I managed to get out was 'Its a girl' before he squealed and hung up on me." Russell shook his head wistfully.
"Louis was a character. He took one look at you in my arms, dropped the mountain of stuffed animals on your mothers bed and reached for you. Once you were safely in his arms he looked up at me and proclaimed.. 'She shall be named after the greatest uncle in the world... me!'"
Quinn stared at her father for a full five seconds before she burst out into laughter. She never heard about her birth, or how she became Lucy Quinn, She always assumed her mother had some weird obsession with the movie Lucy Q, looking at her poor sister named Franny it was believable. But now, hearing that her unknown uncle had named her made the name not so bad.
"What happened to him?" She asked, but regretted it when her father's happy smile disappeared and a sad, angry look took over. She reached to scoot back but stopped when the tears came. Quinn could never remember, ever seeing her father cry. Her mother sure, her sister all the time when they were little, but never, ever her wiped his eyes, but it didn't stop the feeling of a waterfall falling across his cheeks. His eyes shifted to his father's headstone, Russell Ruben Fabray and scowled.
"He was beaten to death outside a club for being gay."
The words felt like dirt falling from his lips, but he had to get it out, he had to say them out loud for her to understand though all he wanted to do was forget. Quinn stared at the headstone and her father in horror. The tears built around her eyes before she could stop them. Softly, slowly she whispered out "what?" Russell nodded softly.
"He was gay, and he was proud too. So was I."
He turned to look at Quinn, staring into her tearing eyes with a look that screamed of some secret understanding. "I was proud of my gay brother Quinn; I didn't care that he was gay he was my brother, and I was proud of him." He continued to stare, watching as her shoulder shook, her head followed next taking a large breath, steeling the little resolve she had left and stared ahead at the headstone.
"This, this is too much right now I, you.." Quinn sighed, she took another long breath and tried to deal with the jumble of emotions rolling like waves inside her chest. So used to hiding everything, tucking every feeling into a locked corner of her mind never to be seen by anyone, especially herself. But now, the door was blasted open, and every emotion, memory, or fleeting thought was screaming for attention and Quinn just didn't know where to begin.
"When I was seventeen, I got your mother pregnant."
Quinns eyed widened, her head snapped up so fast the strain to her muscle cracked under the strain. Staring at her father like he lost his mind. "Franny?" She asked in a soft whisper, his head lifted and lowered in a slow nod. Quinn turned her attention away from the man beside her; she wanted to scream at the hypocrisy of it all, but really she was feeling stupid for not realizing it before. It wasn't like her parents hid how old they where. Her mother just turned thirty-six, her father's thirty-seventh was coming up in six months while her twenty-year-old sister was a sophomore in college. Quinn was sixteen and in AP Math... Yea, she felt stupid.
"We were in love, had been since the moment I saw her on that first day of sophomore year. She had just moved to Cleveland from a small town in Missouri. Looking at her struggling with a load of books and her locker at the opposite end of the hall from mine and I was hooked." He shrugged; a rueful smile crossed his lips. "I knew we should have waited. Both of our parents were big in being absent and saving ourselves for marriage. Of course, peer pressure, it was the 80's. Times where different than when my parents were young." He shrugged
"Didn't keep them from disowning Louis though. He had come out the year before at Christmas. Your grandmother cried in denial, your grandfather just told him to get out and never return, that he only had one son now." Russel scratched the back of his neck absently. Though the conversation was daunting, and he had felt like he was going to throw up this morning when he thought about reviling all to his daughter, but now that he was here, sitting in front of Louis's grave, he felt at peace. Like a burden, he had been caring for so long was finally gone.
"I admit, at first I didn't understand, I was scared and angry. It took a while to realize I wasn't mad that Louis was gay, just that he never told me. Sure, we were almost ten years apart but we told each other everything." He sighed, rubbed his eyes for a moment to regain his focus.
"Anyway, when I got your mother pregnant her parents reacted much like I did with you. They didn't even give her time to pack, just tossed her out the door in the pouring rain. She didn't have a car at the time, she walked the half mile to my house and told me everything. At first, I was scared. I was only seventeen I wasn't ready to be a father. But one look into her eyes, soaked to the teeth and shivering all I could think about was getting her warm before she got sick before the baby got sick. It was at that moment I knew I would do anything for her, and for my unborn child."Russell turned to look at Quinn; he waited until he had her eyes on his. They looked exactly like her mothers, even the confusion and pain was the same as what he saw those twenty some years ago.
"When I told your grandfather, he refused to let her stay with us. Sore up and down she was a whore and I wasn't the father, that we could tell people she cheated on me and was trying to get me to take responsibility for what wasn't mine."
He noticed the flash of guilt crossed his daughters expressive eyes but ignored it for now. He was sure there were things she needed to tell him and they would in time, but first he needed her to understand that he understood, that her mother understood. They may have reacted horribly, and it was something he would regret for the rest of his life. But if he could just get her to see then he knew he could spend his days trying to get her forgiveness.
"I was furious. We fought well into the night until finally your grandfather told me just to leave. So I did."
He turned back to the gravestones, giving his mothers and fathers a passing glance. He didn't speak to either again until after his brother died. They had the balls to show up at the funeral, crying tears he knew where for a show. Seeing them being so fake and pretending to fawn over their grandchildren was disgusting, but at the time he was so hurt and guilty over losing Louis he didn't dare say anything to them. Both passed in a car accident two years later. By the time they had been put to their resting place beside their forgotten son Russell had given into his pain and began drinking. It was the worst decision of his life, and now ten years later he was just starting to see the true impact of that first bottle of scotch had cost him.
"I had a car and a few thousand dollars I had been saving up for a ring. I planned to propose to your mother after graduation. While she finished her high school year, I was going to work in town at the local lumber yard. Then we both would have gone off to college together, but sometimes the best-laid plans are not the one God has set for you."He chuckled at his horrible humor.
"I packed my stuff, helped your mother into the car, and we left. I didn't stop until I pulled up to your uncle's bakery in Chicago. He had a small two bedroom apartment resting above it for rent and, of course; he gave it to us free of charge. Your mother worked in the bakery after school; I got my GED and SAT's done a month into living in our new home and applied for law school."
Quinn sat in silence, listening softly to her father story. Her emotions were still jumbled and jumping all over the place but listening to his soft deep voice was calming, much like it had been when she was little.
"Did you always want to be a lawyer? Mom a homemaker?"
She wasn't sure why she asked, but it was something she had always wanted to know but was to scare to ask. Much like everything she didn't know about her parents it was something that was just left in the back of her mind to be ignored. Russell shrugged.
"Honestly? No, not really. But, I didn't know what I wanted to do after high school. I thought your mother and I would have four years to figure it out but, of course, we didn't and I needed to do something that I knew would help me provide for my new family. It was tough, and some days I would be so stressed I just didn't think I had the strength to continue. But, when your sister was born, and I held her for the first time I knew I could, and I would do anything for her, anything for you" He looked at her again, hoping to make his point through his eyes.
"As for your mother, well she didn't want to be a waitress and baker but you know she fell in love with it. To her, it was like this skill she didn't know she had was suddenly found, and she could do whatever she wanted with it. She had such a talent for decorating it was, magical. We were happy, scared, confused, and trying to manage being new parents and living in a town so much bigger than our own but we were happy."
Quinn nodded. She was thrown by his answer but felt a sense of peace in finally knowing something about her parents. It might have been trivial, but it was more than she had before. Absently her hand rested on her stomach, rubbing gently. "What happened, I mean.. besides Uncle Lou, what changed you and mom?" Russell rubbed his eyes, feeling the sting of tears at her question, but he pushed on.
"I did. Your uncle, he. He was beaten outside of a new gay club that had just opened up a few weeks before. He had been feeling down about his failed relationships with some of the men he was seeing, and I pushed him to go out, have fun, meet someone new." His eyes burned, tears pooled just on the lids before slipping down his cheeks. "He wanted what I had, that love, that family. He wanted his own kids to spoil.. not that he didn't spoil you and Franny rotten sometimes." His lips curled up slightly at the thought.
"After he died, Your grandparents came to the funeral acting upset and claiming it was gods punishment for being a fag."
Quinn reeled slightly, she always suspected her father was homophobic. But she had never actually heard him use such a word before, hearing it now was shocking but not as much as the sting of pain she felt in her chest.
"Sorry, I hate that word too." He nodded to her pained look, reaching out his hand he slipped it into hers and held tightly.
"It was the first time I had seen them since they kicked me out with your pregnant mother. I didn't see them again until I had to lay them to rest here" He motioned to the ignored headstones on his left. "After their funeral, I think it all just hit me at once. I lost my family... Sure, I had your mother and you girls but I lost the people who raised me, and a brother who was my hero. I think, the pain of that loss made me drink, and slowly I started to loose myself. I could hear my father's disparaging words in my head the more I drank until I started to sound like him. Pushing you and Franny into such a harsh Christian lifestyle, flaunting our riches out for all to see and envy. But, it was probably when the Berry's moved into town that things got hard."
Quinn stiffened again, her eyes shifting around her as she tried to ignore the guilt building inside her. She didn't have anything against the Berry's though their daughter was annoying, self-centered and really needed a makeover/wardrobe intervention. She had treated the girl badly with hurt words and comments over the last two years because she figured it was ok since her father hated her parents for being gay, or so she had thought. It was only the last few months she had amped up the bullying to slushy facials and dumpster dives. Quinn tried to justify it to herself it was to teach the girl a lesson for trying to take Finn from her. Pregnant or not you do not try and steal a boy from the head cheerleader of the Cheerios. It was like an unwritten rule and Berry had crossed that. But, the guilt remained in her chest, crushing like a harsh weight pressing her ribcage in towards her heart. Boyfriend or not, head Cheerio or not, did she really have a right to be mad when she has been lying to Finn? When she had changed the boys life forever? When She doesn't even love him?
Russell noticed his daughters change in posture and the burning guilt, frustration, and confusion passing threw her hazel eyes. He didn't understand why and a part of him didn't want to know. He was pretty sure whatever she had done to the berry's was towards their daughter, and though it was wrong, really it was his fault. He had pushed these ideal's and opinions on his daughters because he couldn't handle his pain and his own guilt. This was just another strike to his already wounded pride, and something he knew was going to take a lot more than a talk in a graveyard to fix. But still, he carried on hoping, if he continued to open up towards his daughter, she would return the favor. Maybe.
"I don't hate homosexuals; I couldn't with Louis being so out and proud. I don't hate the Berry's, never really did.. I just, I hated that they got what Louis didn't. I hated to see them so happy and in love, to see them raising a little girl when that is what Louis wanted and what I wanted for Louis. I guess in my drunken stupor I channeled that hate into the gods word about gays." He continued to stare at his child, hoping to make his next point extremely clear.
"The Bible says God hates gays. But the bible was written by men who saw themselves the speakers of Jesus and our Lord. Who is to say God hates gays, lesbians, transgenders? Who is to say that some apostle didn't come across two men kissing and was disgusted by it so decided to make it against God?"
He shrugged at her widened eyes; clearly she hadn't thought about that though Russell did. He did every time he went to church and heard someone make a Disparaging comment about homosexuals. He often wondered if the bible hadn't said anything about being gay was a sin, hell if it had said being gay was apart of gods grand plan, would these same people still hate them? Would they still fight to keep them from being aloud to marry or adopt children? Would they be praised for being chosen as one of gods special children? Or would they been burned at the stake like the witches of Salem. Russell didn't know, but what he did know was he couldn't believe God would create someone like Louis and make him gay just to send him to hell for a sin he didn't want. Because, as happy as he was, as open and proud as he had acted Russell knew that deep down, growing up with such strict religious beliefs his brother had hated himself. And at one point truly thought he was going to hell.
"We don't know Lucy; we just don't know. But, what I believe? What I feel in my heart is that we are all god's children, and he never gives us more then we can handle." He shrugged
"Some are strong enough to be a minority in this world, to be considered a sinner of God, and some... Like your uncle are strong enough to be called a horrible sinning fag while still holding love in his heart for Jesus and our Lord."
When asked later, because Quinn knew one of her friends would ask when they found out, probably Santana. The latina had no reservations about hitting the gritty questions with a nonchalance hiding the burning need to protect and care that she felt for anyone she considered a 'friend.' So, Quinn knew, when her off again, on again best friend since moving to Lima would ask 'why?', Why would she spill her soul out in a graveyard and tell her father everything she has done since finding out she was pregnant. Even admitting WHO the father was to a man who had only a week ago thrown her out for BEING pregnant in the first place, she was going to say to test him. She would tell her friend and anyone else who asked that although she would love to jump into his arms, return to her much missed bedroom and laptop, her phone, and car. To have that sense of belonging return, she also knew that this is the same man who has disappointed her to many times to count. The same guy who put her on such a high pedestal that when she slipped, the disappointing looks where devastating to her child like self-esteem.
So, if she was going to go home again, to believe even with the littlest of hope that everything he said was true. And that things would change for the better she needed to know that if times got difficult he wasn't going to kick her back out, or bail on her again. Truthfully, Quinn told her father everything because deep down she just wanted to get it out. Weeks of holding it all in was beginning to eat at her, and not just her conscious. She was beginning to worry the stress was going to cause problems with the baby if she kept this going much longer. So, sucking in a breath she kept her eyes forward and told Russell Fabray everything.
A/N: Thats the first chapter of "little do you know", so leave a review, send me a PM, let me know what you think. As long as I have the time to write, I'm going to keep writing this story and see where it takes me. Who knows what might happen next, honestly I'm not sure myself but it should be fun to find out! thanks again for reading!
xxKaokiSlyerRomancexx