TITLE: Forever Gone

AUTHOR: Sg-1shorty

SUMMARY: Sam is faced with a problem that she can only over come one way, but from that one action will start a chain of events that will change everything.

DISCLAIMER: All publicly recognizable Stargate SG-1 characters and places are the property of MGM, World Gekko Corp and Double Secret Productions. This piece of fan fiction was created for entertainment only and no infringement on copyrights or trademarks was or are intended. This story and other publicly unrecognized events or characters therein are copyrighted to the author and may not be used or reproduced in entirety or in parts without express permission of the author.

As he enters the briefing room, ready for the next mission they were all fixing to embark on, his thoughts always fell on Major Carter but in his heart...Sam. As everyone entered the room he noticed Sam must be running late.
As he took his seat across from Daniel and Teal'c, General Hammond was still in his office finishing up a phone call.

"At ease Colonel, I believed Major Carter to be running late she has yet to have checked in, but I have tried calling her house and cell phone, with no sucess I'm afraid. I was hoping one of you have maybe heard from her." Hammond said as he entered the room.

"Uh no sir I haven't." Daniel said with a look of worry, hoping that it was not going to be a repeat of what happened a few years back with that Conrad character.

"Indeed I have not seen or spoken with Major Carter since yesterday." Teal'c said with his eyebrow cocked.

"The last time I seen her sir she was here on the base, in her lab yesterday, well basically last night, I ordered her to go home get some sleep, she finally agreed and we left at the same time, as far I knew she had made it home." Jack said as worry had now really gripped his heart. Hoping and praying nothing had happened to her.

"Request permission go to Carter's house and see what's up?"

"Permission Granted, keep me posted"

"Yes Sir"

With that Jack, Daniel, and Teal'c headed to Sam's house, when they arrived they found her car out front so it was good sign she was at home. As they knocked on the door and received no response, Jack took his key and let them in.

As they entered the house immediately they knew something was not right, there was books and papers thrown all over the floor, as they went further into the house calling out for Sam with no repsonse. Jack was getting very worried he searched the house franticly and finally made to Sam's bedroom to find the one thing that would send him back to that dark place he was in when Daniel had first met him. He ran toward her and pulled her up into his arms.

"SAM, SAM, NO, NO COME SAM WAKE UP WAKE UP!!!" As he cradled her limp body in his arms, she had a single gun shot wound to the right temple, the gun laying clenched in right her hand.

Daniel and Teal'c was in shock that Major Carter, the strong and couragous Samantha Carter would bring herself to take her on life.

Daniel reached for his cell phone calling an ambulance and then General Hammond, as he was doing that he looked around the room and found a three envelopes each with their names on it. Those would be read later on, but on top there was a letter left out in plain view apparently holding the reasoning for her choice of death.

As the paramedics arrived Jack had to be pulled out of the room, he kept screaming..." It's not her it can't be she wouldn't do this, she was a happy person.." Jack stopped as he thought about the last part of that sentence 'was she really happy? I mean she really didn't have a life outside of the SGC and I couldn't make her happy the way I had dreamed about, their love had to be kept in that room, so could it be possible'.

Finally Daniel was able to get Jack calmed down enough to sit down at least...with this oppotunity he showed him the paper what had been found out to be the sucide letter written in Sam's unmistakeable handwriting.

As Jack looked at the letter really scared to read it wondering if he would be the reason for this,
but either way he had to know the answer...

To whoever should find this...more than likely Jack, Daniel, and Teal'c,

You three have been the best friends any person could ask for, I know you are all hoping that you didn't cause this and let me assure you, none of you had done anything to impact my decision that I have made. I have been contemplating this for weeks I just couldn't handle losing anyone else. It has always been hard for me to continue after getting to know someone and then you lose them. It first started back with Martouf, when I had to be the one to pull the trigger it has haunted me ever since, seeing him standing there begging for me to help, but all I could do was end his life,
some help I was, then my dad dying that was by far the hardest time if my life as side from my mother, then for my dad to tell me on his death bed to not to let rules stand in my way to be happy. Those words have been eating at me ever since then, when we lost Janet it started to go downward from there another friend... who would be next? And on top of it all I almost lost someone else who I cared for, more than I'm suppose to. I've realized something had to change, and I tried to make it happen, but it seemed that everything was against me. So I have chosen to just throw in the towel I don't want to lose anyone else I can't. I love you all, from the bottom of my heart I'm sorry I have let you down and I know you will hurt but time will heal, and of course you are probably thinking I could have taking my own advice...but I tried it was just everytime I was almost healed I lose someone else. It has to end and the closer I would have gotten to you three one of you would have been next. I couldn't let that happen. I hope you will find in your hearts to forgive me..

Love Always,
Sam

As Jack slowly laid the letter down, tears formed in his eyes, he should have been there for her. Daniel came and sat down next to Jack in Sam's livingroom.

"It wasn't your fault, we couldn't have known that Sam had been thinking about this, she just was tired of losing the ones she loved Jack she loved you, that is why she did this so that you could live.."

" Don't you get it DANIEL I can't live not with out her, she was my life, and I was just to stupid, stubborn and I let those dumb rules get in our way of happiness!!"

At that time the paramedics had Sam's body in a black body bag ready to transport the body to the morgue for a complete autospy. Jack knew last night was the last time for a while that he will get any sleep. So he headed back to the SGC to find something to keep him busy.

The next few days were the hardest, laying Sam to rest really made it hit home, knowing it was goodbye forever. They had a closed casket cermony same kind of hero funeral they had when Janet was killed.

As the funeral let out they had a kind of party to honor the life of Major Samantha Carter, the party was at her house it lasted pretty much the rest of the day, that night as everyone had left, Jack, Daniel, and Teal'c was cleaning up Daniel went and got those other letters figured it would be time to read them or to at least have them to read because he knew he wasn't ready to read his.

"Jack, here I found these the day of the accident I figured I would wait til everything was taking care of before we read them."

"I'm going to read mine little later, I can't right now and if you and Teal'c don't mind could you give some alone time here?"

"Sure thing, we are going to head back to the base, you call if you need anything ok?"

"yeah ok thanks"

So Teal'c and Daniel headed back to the base, Daniel thought to himself he would read his letter when he got back base when he could be somewhere alone because there was no telling what the letter would hold.

I would like to hear what you thought, please give feedback!! But don't be to hard this is my first story and there is more to come...