Movie Night With Team Free Will

Utter immaturity ahead. I was tired when I wrote these, enough so to think it was a good idea.

I got this idea ages ago, and was in no way trying to copy the lovely comic masterpiece by Blackbird Rose on Deviantart entitled "Cas Ruins Film Night" and its sequels, which I didn't find until after I'd started 'em. You really should look that up, though. Cas is such a dear. So here we go... Ocean's Eleven, The Green Mile, The Adjustment Bureau, Rocky Horror, Back To The Future 3, Boondock Saints, 2012, Secondhand Lions, and Saving Private Ryan, with frank commentary courtesy of Team Free Will.

Ocean's Eleven:

Dean: Dude, we coulda totally done that ourselves. In about half the time. Without any help. …Except maybe the little Chinese dude.

Sam: Or, y'know, Cas could've just popped into that vault and taken all the cash for us.

Dean: Way to suck all the fun out of it, man.

Cas: Well, he does have a point, Dean. Theoretically, it would be fairly simple for me to—

Dean: Whoa, wait, really?

Sam: NO, Dean.

Dean: But—

Sam: NO.

The Green Mile:

Dean: Heh. Sucks to be Tom Hanks.

Sam: Kinda sucks to be anybody.

Dean: Except the mouse, I guess.

The Adjustment Bureau:

Sam: There's something about the plot here that seems, like, eerily familiar to me…

Cas: *sigh* If only my brothers really were this innocuous and benign…

Sam: This is innocuous and benign?

Cas: Comparatively speaking, yes.

Dean: Y'know, I'm only here right now because, hey, Matt Damon movie usually equals 2 hours of guns and explosives. I'm very disappointed.

The Rocky Horror Picture Show:

Cas: I…don't think I understand. Why is this man dancing and singing in women's undergarments and being, um, uncomfortably forceful in his promiscuity with members of both sexes? Is he…allowed to be doing that?

Sam: …I guess?

Dean: Uh…Why are you guys watching this?

Cas: It looked interesting.

Dean: *snort* That's one word for it.

Sam: I don't know. It's like watching a train wreck or some equally horrible disaster. I just can't look away.

Cas: What does the obese man on the motorcycle have to do with the storyline?

Sam: I don't think he does.

Back To The Future: Part 3:

Sam: Wow…déjà vu.

Dean: Are you kidding? I made a way better Clint Eastwood than this punk.

The Boondock Saints:

Dean: Huh… You ever considered a career change, Sammy?

Sam: No, Dean.

Dean: Come on, dude. We could totally do what these Irish dudes are doing. Still fightin' the good fight and all, right? It's practically the same as what we already do, anyway, and hey, we even get to chant a little Latin afterwards.

Sam: …No, it's not quite the same.

Dean: *shrugs* Have it your way, then. But seriously, we're way better-equipped than these guys. All we need now are some cool sunglasses.

Sam: And rope, apparently.

Cas: What exactly are you proposing to do?

Dean: Take down all the evil mob bosses in Boston.

Cas: Is that all? *Vanishes*

Dean: Where-

Cas: *Reappears* It's done.

Sam: What's done?

Cas: The systematic eradication of all of the wicked men who partook in activities of organized crime within the city limits of Boston, Massachusetts. It was fairly simple, really, as none of them were sufficiently prepared to ward off an—

Sam: You did…WHAT?

Cas: Was I unclear?

Sam: *Sigh* Never mind.

Cas: I must say the film was…most inspiring.

Dean: Dude, you totally stole our thunder.

Sam: Remind us never to show you The Departed...

2012:

Cas: This is preposterous.

Dean: You got that right. Why in particular?

Cas: This is completely implausible. The Apocalypse could never happen like this.

Dean: Well, I guess we don't ever have to find out how it would have happened, right? So we can all just sit back and congratulate ourselves a little bit, have a good laugh at this.

Sam: I dunno. Right now I'm kinda just depressed.

Dean: Why? Everybody dying, or Cusack?

Sam: Little of both.

Secondhand Lions:

Cas: These two elderly gentlemen vaguely remind me of the two of you.

Sam: Maybe, if we live that long…

Dean: Eh, I don't see it. 'Cause there's no way I'd be babysitting this whiny little Haley Joel brat when I'm 70...

Sam: *shrugs* Well, if we ever needed our own human EMF detector, a Haley Joel brat might actually come in handy.

Dean: Nerd.

Cas: I don't follow.

Sam: Never mind.

Saving Private Ryan:

Dean: Wow. Sucks to be Tom Hanks. …Again.

Sam: Dude, are you crying?

Dean: *sniffle* SHUT UP, SAM.