Fandom: X-men: Evolution
Title: Do I Love Him?
Author: Hyperdrive85
Pairing: Logan/Trek (Original Character)
Genre: Romancey-Angst I guess?
Summary: A crazed scientist from the Weapon X project kidnaps Trek after seeing his friendly relationship with Logan. Logan goes to rescue him, and deals with some emotional issues he is facing.
Rating: R for language
Disclaimer: Marvel owns 'em, I just write with them. I promse to put them back where I found them when done, nothing broken. I don't make money or anything off this, all I get is feedback!
Author's note: Done in Logan POV, don't kill me if I suck at it cuz this IS my first time for first person POV.
=======================================================
DO I LOVE HIM?
Hyperdrive85
=======================================================
12:00pm, Saturday.
I sigh to myself as I lay against a big oak tree by the backyard pool. This is the time of day where everyone gets to relax. After early morning training. We all get an hour or two to relax before Xavier has me teach the survival tactics class. Don't get me wrong, I like to teach, to show these little kids I am not an old man. Hehe, I like to see them get a good workout, but I like to relax too. I lay down and begin to breath softly, that is till I smell him. Trek, I smell Molecule as I call him. His airy guy smell. Not like ditz, but his powers give off a scent of clearness. Then he smells like a usual teen guy, sweat and hormones. He is walking towards me as he usually does every Saturday now. He says hi, I grunt and he sits in the grass by me.
I guess this started a few months ago. I don't know why I talk with him now, I guess just to let out that side of me that needs to talk. Everyone has it, mine is smaller but it still needs attention. But Molecule started saying hi to me just once or twice during the day, out of nowhere. Then I started actually replying, at first with grunts or nods, then I said hi back and it seemed to make him happier. I don't see what he likes about me, most everyone else would rather stay away. But he doesn't, and I guess it's ok. What I don't understand is why!? Why me? Why does he want to hang around me? We do have some things in common but that is about it. He likes it when I talk about things I can remember from my past, like how I helped Captain America. I asked him for a story on his past, and he didn't want to talk about it. So I let it go, I was really just being polite. So now, every Saturday he comes over and sits, and we talk about anything now. Girls he likes, Guys who like those girls, fights we've been in. Little things like that, then some big things like becoming and X-man someday or helping his brother join the X-men. But usually, it's just small talk till class starts.
"Are we going to do anything new in your class today Mr. Logan?"
"Not today, next week we will. But I ain't tellin' ya early Molecule!"
"Aw come on! I won't tell, I just wanna get ready!"
"Survival training is about teaching you to learn on the run. I ai't tellin' ya so suck it up ok?"
"Ok, sorry. So....what do you think about?"
I open an eye, what kinda question is that!?
"What kinda question is that?"
He shrugs and smiles at me, playing with the grass
"I don't know, I just felt like asking!?"
"I think about what other people think. Life, Love, Happiness...all that."
"Love? Mr. Logan thinks about LOVE? haha!"
"What about it Molecule, I can love can't I!?"
"Well sure, but I mean, you don't seem the type to fall in love."
I sit up and look at him, all he does is smile....which for some reason makes me smile back at him a little, then I reach out and rub his hair before standing up.
"Hehe, maybe you're right Molecule, maybe I am to old to love. Or just to gruff."
He stands up and laughs at me a little, he nods. I turn around and see Scott pointing to his watch, it's time to prepare my lesson. So I look back to say goodbye to Trek, but he's already run over to some other students and talking with them now. I smile, he's a nice kid, I can see why I talk with him.....it makes me feel good about myself.
***********************
2pm, Survival Training
***********************
I am out looking, looking for Trek and a girl, her name is Kita. They were a team with Bobby. He came out of the woods scarred to the heels, and said he lost Trek and Kita in the woods. So I am out her on my own, looking for them. I am worried as hell, for both of them....but for Trek more. As I smell for them, I think to myself why do I care more for Trek than the others? Or is it just 'cause I talked to him earlier today and he is on my mind. That must be it. There, I catch their scent in a matter of minutes I find them both. Kita is lying by an unconscious Trek, she is crying. She starts to talk fast and slurred, so I tell her to stop....not gently, but harsh and she zips up, scared. I didn't mean to, but it's me I guess.
"Mr. Logan, we were walking behind Bobby, and I had cut my knee on a rock I stumbled on. Trek was helping me walk and Bobby hadn't noticed he was getting ahead. Trke hadn't either, he was to busy helping me walk. Then I fell. He tried to hold me up but it knocked him of balance, and he fell and smacked his head on the rock wall over there. I tried to carry him but my knee hurt so much, and he is a lot heavier than me. Please, help him!"
I knelt down and looked at her knee, it was fine now, so she stood up and I told her to find her way out. She complained till I gave her a look and immediatly left after that. I carefully reached down and turned Trek over on his back, he moaned....his face had a huge blueish bruise on it's right side. He opened his left eye a little, then the right. He reached for his bruise to rub it, but I grabbed his hand.
"Don't touch it Molecule, it'll just hurt more. Lets get you back"
I lifted him up and into my arms. Then I stood there, as he curled his hands around my neck and fell back into unconscousness. It was strange, holding him. I have carried plenty of guys and girls, escpecially in my amry days....but this was different for some reason. I let out a sigh, I'd think about it later....or not. I finally remembered how to walk and started out for the Institute.
Everyone cheered when I brought him out like it had been some rescue or something. But it was just a class.
***********************
6pm Infirmary
***********************
"Logan, you can go now, I just finished eating and can watch him."
Jean said as I sit there, staring at the kid. If he had hit any other spot on his head, he'd be fine. But the way he smacked it sent him into a deep sleep. Chuck said he'd be awake sometime tonight. I said I'd be there.
"Alright Jeanie, thanks. I'll be right back."
She nodded as I walked out, she sat down and started to read a small book to herself. She didn't care as much, does she even know his name? What happens if he wakes up with her there? I should stay, I care. I care? I care for this kid? That word echoes in my mind...clear and distant it feels. I haven't truley cared in a long time. But, why do I care for him. I shake my head, it's just my concscience....I should have kept a better eye on him during training, yea that's it. I walk into the kitchen, everyone else is gone, so I sit and eat the supper Ororo prepare for me before she left.
***********************
Sometime around noon
***********************
Magneto, I can't believe he'd be foolish enough to fight us here.....at the Mall. Me, Cyke, Jeanie, Popsicle, the Elf, and Molecule. Not the Acolytes, but some small robot things, very agile. We're fighting as well we can. I hack and slash thru them, losing myself in rage. I see Cyclops and Jean doing ok, but the Elf is having a hard time since all he does is port....then I see Trek helpin' him out and I go back to concentrating on fighting. Then the unthinkable happens, I get thrown back by a robot and hit the floor....it gets me so mad that I rish and slam the robot into the wall with my claws, slicing it in the mid-section. I'm happy, till it changes to Molecule....to Trek. He's gasping, I think to myself that I was so mad with rage I started to see everyone as robots. He's trying to stand up but is leaning, and starting to sag. I grab him, and hold him up. All he does is look up at me and say "Good....shot" then he goes cold.
"NOOOOO!"
I sit up and scream as drops of cold sweat drip down. It's dark now....black. I look around and I can now feel the softness of my bed under me. I take a deep breath and lay back down with a flop. I can't go back to sleep now, so I get up....I throw on some sweatpants and walk out of my room, I'll go where I usually go when I have the bad dreams....the roof.
***********************
1am Roof of Institute, Sunday
***********************
I am laying up here alone, staring at the stars. The stars that are always there, so constant. I start to think to myself again. I've got to find out about my past, these dreams that usually consist of random images that scare the hell out of me, are changing. They're now mixed with me killing people I know. But, as I usually go back to sleep afterwards....tonight all I can think about is Trek. His looks, his voice, his smell. It's all so vivid. Why!? Why can't I get him out of my head. I like him.....no. I'm a man who likes women. Sure, I've fucked a few guys before, and had some give me a hand or blow job....but not in love, just when I needed it. But this is a 17 year old, I can't have feelings like that towards him!! I don't even feel that way towards Jeanie! Why do I feel like I like him.
Then there is a creak as the door opens, and I hear footsteps....it's him. Does he just magnetically attract to me. Then he stops and I can feel him looking down towards me.
"Mr. Logan.....I'm sorry, I didn't know anyone came up here."
"What are ya doin' up Molecule? It's way past curfew!"
"I know....but I needed to think."
"Think? Up here?"
Is he fooling with me?
"Yea, I come up here when I have a bad dream....or just need alone time."
Bad dreams....once again he hits close to home.
"Oh, fine....come on over than, what'ya dream about?"
"Nothing....."
"Nothing? Or Nothing you want to talk about!?"
He sits down beside me and looks up at the stars then looks down at me laying down, I feel nervous for some reason.
"I, dreamt.....about my past. In jumbles. It was like looking at a jigsaw puzzle in it's box, all jumbled and you try and look at all the pieces at once. Hehe, but you probably don't understand."
I reach out to touch his back, then I stop.
"Yea, I do actually. Happens to me too, it's cuz the past is locked away."
He looked at me, I put my hand back down. He smiled.
"Yea....exactly. Thank you..."
"For what?"
"For showing me, I'm not the only one out there who has this problem."
I smiled back at him, although he proll'y couldn't see it since it was getting darker. I feel good that I can help him. But then I feel nervous again....why?
"Eh, no problem kid-" I should send him to bed, but instead, I reach out and let him lay on me. He doesn't draw back he just does. He rests his head on my shoulder and leans in close to me. I don't know why I am doing this, I'm a man who likes women.....but he feels so soft against my hairy skin, he just lays there breathing. Is he wondering the same thing? I don't know....but I don't care now. Just let this moment be peacful, we both understand each other more now, and that's what matters.
We lay there for what seems like hours, just staring. Then I feel sleep taking me, so I sit up stirring Trek into half awakeness. I stand him up and he is so tired now that I have to pick him up. Again, I just stand there with him in my arms, it feels so nice to care for someone. Then I walk to the door, and down the stairs. I walk to my room not thinking and I am so exausted now. I make a sleepy decision to let Trek stay here, his room is all the way across to the other hall. I open the door and set him on the bed, he just turns over and falls asleep. I take off my sweatpants and slip into some shorts so I am not completely undressed as I usually do, but I do have SOME intellegence still. I lie down beside him and fall asleep, letting his airy guy scent fill my head as I nod off too.
***********************
7am My room, Sunday
***********************
I wake, and it takes me a few minutes to realize Trek is in my bed still. He had curled up againts me, and my arm had wrapped around his chest. Now, it feels right.....so good. Then I snap out of it, and I pull my hand away and he turns a little still asleep. I feel so bad, having Molecule here.....in my bed. He slept with me. Not that we did anything wrong, but he slept in my room in my bed, with me. I get up and put on my sweats from last night and throw on an undershirt. Walking to the door I look back at him, then I close it and walk down to breakfast.
I get down there and no one is there. They usually wake at 8am, the ones who like to attend church. I just wake up early. I sit in the Morning room and sip coffee, and think about him again. Why did I let him sleep there? With me? What will he say when he gets up? Do I, like him? No....it's something else. It was drowziness, had to be....yea I was just to tired to carry him to his room, it's all the way on the other end of the mansion. Yes, just exaustion from last night. Last night, how can I excuse that? We both seem to have much in common, but that cuddle session? I don't know....I just don't. I shake my head and concentrate on other things, like what I need to plan for next weeks survival class.
And hour later, The Elf pops in, says hi in his german accent, then pops out back to his room after grabbing an orange. Half-Pint comes in and pours herself some milk with cereal sitting down she says hi and eats quickly. Scott comes down with Jean and they sit down with some coffee and talk to themselves. After Scott and Jean left, Trek walked in. I glanced at him and he wasn't even looking at me, he popped some bread in the toaster and got out the peanut butter. Then drew the milk off the table from when Kitty had used it. She says hi to him, he says hi back. I wonder if he is trying to avoid me, worried about last night.....or if he hasn't realized that he was in my room yet. The rooms DO look all the same, the only difference is the possesions in the room. He might have not noticed my stuff so sleepy. Well it doesn't matter we'll talk sometime, and I will tell him nothing happened....and that it shouldn't, because we're Men who like Women. Right?
***********************
I didn't know it at the time, but someone had been watching ever since Trek had started befriending me, someone who was learning our schedule, our routine. Soon, they'd do something they'd want to forget if they were still alive...
1pm Outside, Sunday
***********************
They all come back, The Elf, Cyke, Jeanie, Rogue and Molecule....all back from church, I ask how it went and they all say fine, Kurt tries to adapt on it, but he doesn't remember, he only went to be polite, he's more of a catholic even tho they went to some non-denominational church. So I politely ask Trek. He looks up at me then away and just shrugs. Hank opens the door and Cyke hands him a video tape of the sermon. Of course Hank would love to go, but his appereance isn't the best for a church....and he's against the Holo-watch thing Kurt has. Well they all walk in, but I stand in front of Trek before he goes in.
"Hey, what'sa matter?"
"No...nothing, just don't feel like talking."
"Oh? Talking, or talking to me?
"....both....I guess."
"Look, are you worried about, last night?"
He nods "Yes, and this morning."
I sigh, I knew I shoulda taken him to his own room.
"Well, nothin' happened ok! I was just tired, and didn't feel like cartin' your heavy body all the way to your room when I was already at mine."
"Mr. Logan, that's not what I was worried about."
"Then why are you avoiding me?"
"Because.....because....I don't want, anything to happen!"
"Happen, what do you mean?"
Trek obviously feels uncomfortable, I can smell it on him. He's tense and his hormones are getting stronger, I know what he means but yet I ask. As if for self-assurance.
"I mean, what if I start to actually LIKE you. Last night, on the roof, I should have said no to you, when you toldme to lie down. But, I didn't, becasue it felt good. You and I understand each other in a way other people won't, but I don't think we should try and be something we're not."
WELL, that's a relief, he doesn't want me. I smile
"Look kid, I dunno what's goin' thru your head right now, but there is nothing between us. We talk on Saturdays and share common interests. And have some things about us the same. Also, what I did last night, was just care. It's hard, not knowing what you should know....and sometimes....all you need is care from someone."
There, that's why I held him last night, that's why I let him rest againts me, and that's why I let him stay in my bed that night. Yea....exactly.
"Oh...well, thank you. I'm glad we see eye to eye."
He just stood there, and I did too. Something needed to be said, but I wasn't sure what....till it was to late, and he moved, and I moved, and he was gone.
***********************
6pm Kitchen, Suppertime
***********************
Yum, Ororo cooked us up some good eatin's tonight. A big roast with some sorta tangy sauce on it. She also fixed two big bowls of Mashed potatoes with gravy, mixed veggies she had picked from the gardens she manages in the greenhouse, Rolls, and a salad. It was delicious I tell ya, 'Ro's the BEST cook I have ever met. All of the students eat at a bigger table in the Dining room, and the X-men sit in the kitchen. So we usually talk about current events and mutant's rights.....well THEY do, I sit and eat and then smoke a cigar and listen. Personally, I'd rather sit in the students room, they talk about funnier stuff then Charles and Cyke do. Of course, it's rude to state it so I just sit....and "listen" and add imput when asked. Which is not very often.
After supper the kids can go and play outside if they want. I walked out there to make sure they were ok, and not blowing holes into the ground with their powers.....which has happened a few times. I sit on one of the benches watching the guy students play soccer. Popsicle, Molecule, and the Sunny one are on one side, and Krispy, Multiple, and Cannonball are on the other side. Looks to me like Popsicles side is winning. The ball goes flying from one end to the other, looks like a normal game....for once. Well, until Popsicle froze Krispy's legs.....oh no....
"BOBBY! That's cheating!"
"Hehe, oh come on....we never said no powers!"
"Bobby's right...."
That's when it became mutant soccer. Trek ported past Bobby and popsicle passed it to him, scoring a goal. Krispy shot some of that "lightning" and it stopped Bobby in his tracks, so Sam kicked the ball over to Jamie who couldn't reach it, so he cloned himself and then....then everyone started arguing because technically, that IS breaking the rules since it is only 3 on 3, and Jamie just made it uneven. So...looks like I gotta correct it.
"HOLD IT! Game ends now!"
"Aw, come on Mr. Logan!"
"That's not fair..."
"We're having fun!"
"FUN! You are fighting over clones! Plus, look.....Cloneboy didn't MEAN to play unfair, and you are all mad at him, which makes him feel bad. You shouldn't yell at HIM!"
I didn't mean to get mad, but it worked. They all said sorry to Jamie, he shrugged. They decided to go do something else. Trek smiled at me and then ported off somewhere.
***********************
10pm Mansion, Curfew
***********************
"ALLRIGHT, School tommorow, everyone inside....curfew!"
They all mumble as they walk inside. Some dirty and some not. I watch them all, making sure everyone inside. Ray, Jamie, Kita, Jubilation, Amara, Bobby.....everyone. Wait, Trek.
"Cyke, I am gonna make rounds....Trek isn't inside."
"Logan, I think he came in early....I saw him port to his room."
I don't remember that....But I will check his room, just in case. I walk over and knock, no answer. Then Bobby, his roomie walks over.
"Mr. Logan? What's up?"
"You seen Trek?"
"Naw....not since our Soccer game."
He opened the door and switched the light on.....the place was a mess. And not like a teenager guy mess....someone had been in here. The window was open and the beds were unmade....the lamp had fallen too. Bobby looked at me then started to walk in, I stopped him.
"Wait kid...lemme smell around first."
I stepped inside and took a big whiff, whoever cam in hadn't been gone long. I could still smell 'em. It smelle oddly familiar and I thought it might have been Sabertooth, but this isn't his style....the window would be broken and things would too. Mangeto? No...he isn't that stupid....or this untidy when kidnapping. It had to have been someone I met a while back. Or maybe, someone from my past...then it happened. Flashes of my past zooming thru my head...table...hospital? readings.....men....scientists....one is smiling, evily....scared....fear....no! Then, I don't see anything, I feel myself lean forward and fly towards the floor as Bobby yells my name.
***********************
9am Infirmary, Next day
***********************
"Ooohhh....what....happened."
"You had a memory flash, and it knocked you out. Robert came and told me and I carried you here. You took quite a fall....smacked your head on the side of the table."
It was Hank...I tried to sit up but I felt his big hand push me back down
"No no Logan, You're in no condition to get up yet....like I said, you smacked your head on the sidetable in Jared and Robert's room. You were out cold but you started to bleed, your healing factor stopped it tho, but it was longer since you were unconscious....so you'll feel a little dizzy. Lay still and in about an hour you can get up."
"Hank....Trek's out there, been kidnapped. I gotta find him!"
I try to sit up, still can't concentrate long enough to open my eyes...and he pushed me back down. Iwas getting mad....and it gave me a headache so I laid down.
"Charles is talking with the other X-men, they can handle it. YOU on the other hand need to rest up."
I Finally got my eyes open and could see the room well enough, I looked and waited for Hank to turn his back before I sat up. He was right tho, I felt REALLY dizzy....and when I sat up that fast I leaned to the left and flipped right out of the bed....my head hit the floor and god did it hurt. I turn over and saw Hank looking over me with a smirk on his face he was trying to hide.
"Well, maybe NEXT time....you'll listen to me."
So I laid in the bed, the whole time thinking about Trek. Kidnapped, but not just a regular one....by someone from my past. I've had those memory flashes before and it happens when something I smell, see, or touch, is subconsciouslly familiar to me. The man who kidnapped Trek knows me....and I know him. He was probably another scientist on the Weapon X project. The last time I met one of them tho, it was a crazed old man who had control over a chip in my head! Who KNOWS how this guy is.
"Hank, it's been an hour....I feel fine....lemme go see about Trek."
"Logan, why do you care so much about him!? You don't hit me as the type to have personal interests in the younger generation."
"I'm not."
"Then why do you seem to favor him over the others."
"I don't, but....it's the fact that he favors me!"
"I don't understand?"
"He could have looked up to Cyke, or Chuck, or even you...but he finds me as his role model. Something I have never been to anyone. Most of the other students, even the X-men fear me as a leader. Kitty is the closest one who has gotten to being nice to me. But even SHE would rather be with the other students. But Trek....Trek takes time out of his day to just talk with me...about anything! He and I have a lot in common too. Also, he just makes me feel good about myself ok? I smile around him, and it's an honest smile....not just put on."
"Oh...I see...you honestly care for him."
"Yea, I do."
"Nothing more?"
"What? What do you mean by that?"
"I mean Logan....you don't have, any sexual feelings for him?"
"WHAT! NO! Not at all....that's not right Hank. He's a kid!"
"Logan, I know, and that's why I asked. I wanted to make sure it WAS just care for him, not anything more."
"No, I just care about him. Because he cares about me."
Hank nodded, and grabbed some clean clothes he had brought down, he tossed them to me and I changed.
"Thanks Hank.....oh and Hank, don't be tellin' any of the students about this. It'd ruin my rep!"
"No problem Logan, just do me a favor."
"What?"
"Find him Logan, and bring him back safe."
I nodded and ran out the door to talk to Xavier.
***********************
12 noon, Bayville
***********************
I convinced Charles I was in a good enough condition to go look for the kid. I started by getting the guys scent in Trek's room....and leaping out the window. I was SUPPOSED to go with Cyke and the others, but I didn't feel like being a team member....they'd just slow me down anyway. I ran as fast as I could thru the woods, zigzagging as I kept the kidnapper and Trek's scent. I ran until I hit a plain.....I could smell them, but it was in one spot....they must've taken a helicopter or something. I cursed the ground and thought about what I should do next.
I decided to go back and talk to Charles, while the other X-men tried locating him on their own. I ran back to the mansion and up to Charles office...I knocked.
"Come in Logan."
"Ya know Charles, that gets really freaky."
"Sorry...so you came back."
"Yea, looks like the kidnapper took off in an aircraft 20 miles out of the woods."
"So, you want me to locate Trek?"
I felt stupid, I should have asked him that before I took off.
"Yea.....I guess asking you first would have been the smart thing."
"Yes, but don't worry yourself, the other X-men didn't ask me either."
We walked to the elevator, then to Cerebro where Charles went inside and left me outside the door to wait. All I could think about is what was going on with poor Trek. Was he ok? Why hasn't he come back....his powers could help him. Who took him and why did he!? How is he connected to me? I felt so stupid for not keeping an eye on him. Why I don't know.....but I did. I felt like it was my fault he was taken. I got to close, again. I let someone be a friend and they get kidnapped. I shouldn't let it happen again, after I get Trek back.....I am going back to normal secretive Logan. Trek'll have to find a different role model. Xavier came back out and looked very solemnly at me.
"Logan, you must hurry....I found Trek but, he's very weak. Not like a tired weak, but a beaten weak. He is in pain, and to weak to help himself. He's in an abandoned military outpost right at the border of Canada....take the X-copter."
"No, I'll take my bike!"
"Logan, you may not get there in time!!"
"Listen Charles, if I take the Helicopter, I'll be spotted and shot down before I can get inside. I can ride my bike there just as fast, and be secretive about it."
"....... Alright Logan, but be quick."
"No problem Charles! Already out the door!"
I took off running to the garage, I flipped onto my bike, slipped my helmet on and drove off onto the open road. Zoomin past traffic till I reached a side road that I took north. Within 3 hours I was at the Canadian border. I hid my bike in a patch of brush and took off on foot in the snow, towards the base hidden behind some small mountains. It wasn't fun, because on top of having to sneak, it was harder because there were weapons hidden everywhere....I had to be extra stealthy as not to alert them to my presence. I only triggered one or two the first few minutes, but it seemed later on that every ten steps I would have a laser fire or some spinnig blades pop out. I finally reached the base. Well, I reached the fence surrounding it. But I was concentrating so hard on getting in, I hadn't noticed that a lookout had spotted me and thrown a sleeping gas grenade at me, and before I could react, I was out like a light.
***********************
Time unknown, Inside base
***********************
I woke up to find myself strapped to the wall, my hands spread out and upwards clamped by very tough metal bands, my feet were the same except downwards, about an inch from the floor. My body stripped of all my clothes and belongings, I looked to my left and saw them crumpled in a pile on a table....they looked like they had been gone thru. I was furious, so I naturally extended my claws, big mistake.
"GGRAAAAHHHH!!!!"
A shock so hard went thru my body. It hurt so bad, I retracted my claws. Then I heard the laughing. So evil, twisted....insane. A voice from the shadows followed, all that I could see was a little to my left and right, a light was shining on top of me and it passed in a small circle around me all else was in shadows. The voice, was gentle, but manly, and yet....crazy. It had that mad scientist tone to it, I hate scientists.
"Ah Weapon X, we meet again, you still have your same old charm....how charming, oh I made a funny HAHA!"
"The hell do you want with me! Where is Trek!?"
"What do I want with you? Nothing....just revenge. I plan to kill Trek."
"NO!! WHO ARE YOU!?"
The voice laughed again and stepped out of the darkness to my right, he was an old man....but not senior old, more like late 30's early 40's I guessed. He had a balding head, brown hair. He wore very ark goggles so I couldn't see his eyes, and he had a small beard, like one you get when you don't shave before work in the mornings. He wore a grungy lab coat, it had blood on it....and it smelled fresh, but I couldn't tell what it was from being so little. He walked up to me and looked straight at me.
"You need not concern about who I am, since you won't see me ever again after this."
"What....what did you do with him?"
"Your little boyfriend?"
"He's not a boyfriend....he's a student that you had no right to kidnap!"
"HAHAHA!! Oh, I don't have the right! Next time I will be sure to get a permit."
"Damn you, you better let me go or there is gonna be some serious hurtin' in store for you bub!"
"Me? My wrists aren't strapped to antimantium reflective bands. You pop those claws and the wristlets send a wave of shock thru you again."
All I could do was wait then, for the right moment....but what about Trek.
"What aobut Trek, where is he?"
"Trek!? He's in a cell....waiting his death out."
"Why would you kill him, he never did anything to you!"
"But you did....you did you beast!"
"I don't even KNOW you!"
"No, you do, you just don't REMEMBER me! You see Logan, I was one of the scientists in the Weapon X project.....which of course was you. Well, after you went mad....you killed many people."
"Not my fault, maybe if you hadn't fucked with my HEAD!"
"I'm not finished! You didn't kill me obviously, but....you did kill my family! My wife and two sons!! It made me so depressed....and I vowed after you escaped that I'd make you pay!"
"Look bub, I'm sorry I killed them....but it wasn't my fault, you and your experiment did it!"
"SHUT UP! I plotted to kill you when I found you...but when I DID find you I saw that you were a teacher of mutants!! Then, I saw him....the boy you call Trek. He looked up to you, and you let him get close! So now, I am going to kill him like you killed my family....and you'll never see him again!"
"NOO!!!! NO YOU CAN'T!!!*I popped my claws*GRRAHAHHHAAAAHHH*retract*"
"Don't try it Logan, you'll kill yourself trying. But I am going to make this much more painful for you then it was to me!"
".....how.....killing is killing."
"Oh, but it's the way you do it. While I was waiting for you, I had a little "fun" with Trek! See my stained coat....that's your little followers blood....you wouldn't BELIEVE the kind of fun I had torturing him!"
My blood was boiling....he had hurt the kid. And not just a slap....he had beaten him till he bled. It made me furious, I wanted to break free, but the bands were to tight, and my claws were under the power of the shocks, they got worse everytime I tried to break out too.
"You....sick bastard! GAAHHHH!!!"
The shock hit me hard....when it stopped I could feel myself sizzling. I could hardly breath.
"Don't call me names....this is not your place. This is mine, and I am in control! Now, back to what I was doing! So far I have done many things to him. He's gonna be one big scab by the time I finish....oh but he'll be dead then so it doesn't matter. But don't take my word for it, why don't I let you watch the tape we made!"
"You...recorded....it! You're so....twisteGAAHAHHHH!!!"
"Ah ah ah, be nice Wolvie!"
A Television on a wheeled table rolled over and the man stuffed in a tape and played it. He shocked me if I looked away or closed my eyes. It was aweful to watch, Trek's hands were tied behind his back in a way that they were tucked into tight fists, so he couldnt open them. He needed them open to use his powers. He was also blindfolded....all he had one were his blue boxer shorts, and they were already a bit torn. I watched as the man whipped him with a long black leather whip, each time Trek screaming for help....crying....to weak to fight back. I watched as the man twisted Trek in positions he shouldn't bend, and heard him scream in agony...for help....help I should have been there to give. but, that wasn't the worst part....I watched as the man ripped Trek's boxers off....and...and raped the poor kid, right in the ass. It was horrible, I hadn't noticed till now that I was crying, it wasn't right....it was evil and demonic! The kid was so young....and he was being beaten to death. I was so mad...so filled with fury that I extended my claws in one last effort to free myself, the pain hurt so much....the shock so hard. Then I heard the man.
"STOP! OR I KILL HIM NOW!!"
"huff....hufff.....you....BASTARD! He's just...a little....KID!!!"
"So were my boys....and my wife was my pride! You killed them!"
"I Killed them....with no THOUGHT! I wasn't me....I was under.....the influence...OF YOUR EXPERIMENT! You.....you did it thru thought! You raped him....you've defiled him!!!"
"And after I kill him, you'll feel my pain 10 times worse!!!"
He motioned at what I assumed was a man in the shadows, in a few moments I heard foot steps and the sound of dragging. Then a flump, I looked down by the man and there was Trek....beaten, bruised, bloody, and naked...kneeling lifeless by the man.
"Trek...Trek....look what you've done to him!"
The man took a deep breath and kicked Trek, a moan shot out from him as he toppled over into the darkness again. It hurt me more than Trek tho, to see him like that. His pride beaten out of him. All I could do tho, was be still and wait for my chance to break loose. The scientist walked right up to my face and whispered to me.
"I'll be back....to finish this, once I have some more "fun" with your little student!"
"No....leave him alone....he hurts enough.....already!"
Still it was no use, he was already gone. And all I could do was be still, tied to the wall in silence, and wait for them to come back.
***********************
Later, Inside Base
***********************
I had fallen asleep, sometime....how I don't know, since these bands were hurting like hell on earth now. I would have probably lost all feeling in them if I didn't have my healing factor, which I kind of wish I didn't right now since my arms hurt like a bitch. I just stayed there, waiting....my eyes adjusted to the darkness better now, and I could make some things out. There was a big table....and chairs....two doors on both sides. I could tell the place wasn't in use anymore, because I could smell mold and rot all over. Then I heard footsteps, he was coming back. He entered and noticed right away that i had adjusted to the darkness because I looked over at him and he was surprised I saw him.
"Well, you're finally awake. I finished with your student Trek a few minutes ago and he is doing....horrible. His death will be so painful for you I know."
All I could do was let out a low growl, I was so tired of his crap.
"Oh now now, let's talk!"
"About....what...."
"I want to know exactly how much you love the boy!"
"I don't....love him...."
"You don't? GUARD! Bring the boy in again and set him in that chair."
A guard left the room and came back dragging poor track by a rope wrapped around his hands, he rufly set him in a chair which made Trek swiftly grunt and then moan in pain. He was worse off then before....so bloody and beaten.
"When I break free, I am gonna tear you limb from limb! Look at him, he's just a kid!"
"Logan....don't make me shock you! Now, you say you don't love him?"
"I don't.....I care about him!"
"More than the other students at that school?"
"....."
The man pulled out a whipe and slapped it on Trek's knees, Trek fell off the chair trying to jerk away.
"Obviously not."
"Yes....I do...."
"Why? Why care for a young boy like him!?"
"Because he cares about me....let him go."
"No"
"You sick perevertGAAAHHH!!!!"
The shock, I forgot about it, but it didn't hurt as much as last time
"No name calling. Logan, do you love him?"
His voice was so twisted, he wanted to pull Yes out of my mouth so much, but I didn't know why.....but I wasn't about to admit it to him.
"No, I care about him! More than....the other kids."
"Why? Because he cares for you...."
"That's what I said!"
"So, you don't care about him, because of how he treats you?"
"What?"
"The way he touches you....or speaks to you."
"What the fuck are you talking about?"
"Don't you like it....when he holds your hand. Don't you like it, when he gets almost close enough to you, to kiss him?"
"WHAT!! What kind of sick question is that!? He's a KID!"
"Don't lie to me Logan, or I'll make his death a lot worse. I want to know, that you love him!"
"I DON'T! I just, care for him......a lot."
"I doubt that, it's much more Logan. You love it when he touches you. When he speaks softly to you. When he gets so close to you that all you can smell is him. When he is so close you could kiss him."
"No, it's not like that! Now let him go....please."
"Please!? Why do you want me to release him so much!?"
"Because...."
I almost said it, Because I love him. It was aparent in my mind now....that I did love him. not just in care, but that I wanted him to be mine. It was true....I loved him.
"Because WHAT Logan?"
"I love him...."
"What? Couldn't hear that!"
"I LOVE him....ALRIGHT! Let him go now!"
Although nothing had happened to me, I felt like I had just been defiled like Trek.
"hahahahaha, LET HIM GO!? Oh no, I just wanted to hear you say those things, to make sure I was killing the right person in front of your very eyes."
The scientist pulled out a gun from his pocket and aimed for Trek's forehead. This was it, if I didn't break free, Trek'd be gone.....forever. So, with the small amount of strength I felt I lunged forward, extending my claws....the shock came. At first it almost stopped me, but then it felt energizing almost. I could feel bands pulling away from the wall. The scientist looked over at me and pointed the gun at me, I laughed just a little. Then I felt them snap and instantly I clawed off my ankle bands and sweep kicked the guy before he could shoot. He dropped his gun andin one swift motion I had him up agains the wall, my left hand claws shoved so close to his face if he sneezed it was all over.
"You, are a sick, twisted, and perverted freak!! How DARE you abuse a poor defenceless kid like that!! TWICE!! You think what I did was wrong, so do I. But what you did was wrong, no matter HOW you felt about it! So now, you're going to die."
I would have killed him, if two big guys hadn't of tackled me. I hit the floor, but immediatly clawed both in the chest, killing them instantly. I jumped up, naked to the world...but the guy was gone. I would have run after him, but Trek was there on the cold floor, naked and bloody. I would get the guy some other time, Trek was my priority now.I carefully knelt down and untied his hands, then I rolled him slowly over and heard him groan.
"Trek, please speak to me."
"....M..ister....Logan?"
"Trek, it's ok now, lets get out of here."
"k....."
While I had time I reached over and stole the uniform off one of the dead guys, it fit a little loose but with some tucking I got it to work. I covered Trek in the other guys shirt and pulled him up into my arms. For the third time I stood still for a moment, but this time I wasn't worried about how I felt, now I was looking down into his eyes as he mouthed thank you, and closed them. I nodded and made a run for the outside.
Of course, when the guy escaped he alerted all the soldiers under his command to come after me, so a few feet out of the lab, I ran into 10 soldiers all ready and aimed at me. I thought I would have to fight, till Trek intervened. He lifted his hand up very slowly and the guns dropped and skidded over to me. One floated up and I grabbed and fired. All 10 were dead before they could run off. It was like that the whole way, the base was big too. Since I didn't know my way around I couldn't get out easily. but I finally made my way out, just in time to see the X-copter fly overhead and lower the crane with Cyclops in it. I plopped Trek in and told them my bike was still in the woods, he nodded and I ran off to grab my bike and beat it back home.
***********************
9am Wednsday, Infirmary
***********************
Well, he finally woke up after a day of sleep. I never left the room while he was either. I had also talked to Hank, and he understood my real feelings....but told me not to say anything, since it would give a bad rep to me as a teacher. I agreed and told him I would have waited till he was older anyway. He woke up and smiled when he saw me, he wanted to speak but he was to tired.
"Hold up Molecule, you've had quite a trama. You need to sleep more."
"Wait, I'm ok....really."
"....."
"Mr. Logan, thank you."
"No problem, it's my job."
"......" "I know it was more than that."
I blushed, he was right. But I couldn't let him now how I really felt. I sat down on the side of his bed and turned o face him.
"I care about ya Trek, cuz you take the time out of your day to talk with me and be a true friend."
"Oh, ok....good."
"Ok, now get some sleep, and I'll be right back with some soup."
I stood up and began to walk out, when Trek asked me...
"Logan, was what you said, about really loving me....did you mean it?"
I stood there not facing him, I should have said yes...I would have too, but I remembered what I had said to Hank. So I lied.
"Well, would the guy have stopped abusing you if I didn't say that? It's what he wanted."
"......yea...you're right. I understand, it's kool. Thanks"
"No problem, I'll be back with soup."
I walked out of the infirmary and Hank gave me one of those right thing nods, I just grunted. I stepped into the kitchen and put on my gruff attitude again.
About a week later everything was back to normal, Trek would talk with me more often...and I would act normal. But sometimes, when we both had bad dreams and ended up on the roof, I would hold him, and he would let me, and I never thought about it being uncomfortable again.
THE END
Title: Do I Love Him?
Author: Hyperdrive85
Pairing: Logan/Trek (Original Character)
Genre: Romancey-Angst I guess?
Summary: A crazed scientist from the Weapon X project kidnaps Trek after seeing his friendly relationship with Logan. Logan goes to rescue him, and deals with some emotional issues he is facing.
Rating: R for language
Disclaimer: Marvel owns 'em, I just write with them. I promse to put them back where I found them when done, nothing broken. I don't make money or anything off this, all I get is feedback!
Author's note: Done in Logan POV, don't kill me if I suck at it cuz this IS my first time for first person POV.
=======================================================
DO I LOVE HIM?
Hyperdrive85
=======================================================
12:00pm, Saturday.
I sigh to myself as I lay against a big oak tree by the backyard pool. This is the time of day where everyone gets to relax. After early morning training. We all get an hour or two to relax before Xavier has me teach the survival tactics class. Don't get me wrong, I like to teach, to show these little kids I am not an old man. Hehe, I like to see them get a good workout, but I like to relax too. I lay down and begin to breath softly, that is till I smell him. Trek, I smell Molecule as I call him. His airy guy smell. Not like ditz, but his powers give off a scent of clearness. Then he smells like a usual teen guy, sweat and hormones. He is walking towards me as he usually does every Saturday now. He says hi, I grunt and he sits in the grass by me.
I guess this started a few months ago. I don't know why I talk with him now, I guess just to let out that side of me that needs to talk. Everyone has it, mine is smaller but it still needs attention. But Molecule started saying hi to me just once or twice during the day, out of nowhere. Then I started actually replying, at first with grunts or nods, then I said hi back and it seemed to make him happier. I don't see what he likes about me, most everyone else would rather stay away. But he doesn't, and I guess it's ok. What I don't understand is why!? Why me? Why does he want to hang around me? We do have some things in common but that is about it. He likes it when I talk about things I can remember from my past, like how I helped Captain America. I asked him for a story on his past, and he didn't want to talk about it. So I let it go, I was really just being polite. So now, every Saturday he comes over and sits, and we talk about anything now. Girls he likes, Guys who like those girls, fights we've been in. Little things like that, then some big things like becoming and X-man someday or helping his brother join the X-men. But usually, it's just small talk till class starts.
"Are we going to do anything new in your class today Mr. Logan?"
"Not today, next week we will. But I ain't tellin' ya early Molecule!"
"Aw come on! I won't tell, I just wanna get ready!"
"Survival training is about teaching you to learn on the run. I ai't tellin' ya so suck it up ok?"
"Ok, sorry. So....what do you think about?"
I open an eye, what kinda question is that!?
"What kinda question is that?"
He shrugs and smiles at me, playing with the grass
"I don't know, I just felt like asking!?"
"I think about what other people think. Life, Love, Happiness...all that."
"Love? Mr. Logan thinks about LOVE? haha!"
"What about it Molecule, I can love can't I!?"
"Well sure, but I mean, you don't seem the type to fall in love."
I sit up and look at him, all he does is smile....which for some reason makes me smile back at him a little, then I reach out and rub his hair before standing up.
"Hehe, maybe you're right Molecule, maybe I am to old to love. Or just to gruff."
He stands up and laughs at me a little, he nods. I turn around and see Scott pointing to his watch, it's time to prepare my lesson. So I look back to say goodbye to Trek, but he's already run over to some other students and talking with them now. I smile, he's a nice kid, I can see why I talk with him.....it makes me feel good about myself.
***********************
2pm, Survival Training
***********************
I am out looking, looking for Trek and a girl, her name is Kita. They were a team with Bobby. He came out of the woods scarred to the heels, and said he lost Trek and Kita in the woods. So I am out her on my own, looking for them. I am worried as hell, for both of them....but for Trek more. As I smell for them, I think to myself why do I care more for Trek than the others? Or is it just 'cause I talked to him earlier today and he is on my mind. That must be it. There, I catch their scent in a matter of minutes I find them both. Kita is lying by an unconscious Trek, she is crying. She starts to talk fast and slurred, so I tell her to stop....not gently, but harsh and she zips up, scared. I didn't mean to, but it's me I guess.
"Mr. Logan, we were walking behind Bobby, and I had cut my knee on a rock I stumbled on. Trek was helping me walk and Bobby hadn't noticed he was getting ahead. Trke hadn't either, he was to busy helping me walk. Then I fell. He tried to hold me up but it knocked him of balance, and he fell and smacked his head on the rock wall over there. I tried to carry him but my knee hurt so much, and he is a lot heavier than me. Please, help him!"
I knelt down and looked at her knee, it was fine now, so she stood up and I told her to find her way out. She complained till I gave her a look and immediatly left after that. I carefully reached down and turned Trek over on his back, he moaned....his face had a huge blueish bruise on it's right side. He opened his left eye a little, then the right. He reached for his bruise to rub it, but I grabbed his hand.
"Don't touch it Molecule, it'll just hurt more. Lets get you back"
I lifted him up and into my arms. Then I stood there, as he curled his hands around my neck and fell back into unconscousness. It was strange, holding him. I have carried plenty of guys and girls, escpecially in my amry days....but this was different for some reason. I let out a sigh, I'd think about it later....or not. I finally remembered how to walk and started out for the Institute.
Everyone cheered when I brought him out like it had been some rescue or something. But it was just a class.
***********************
6pm Infirmary
***********************
"Logan, you can go now, I just finished eating and can watch him."
Jean said as I sit there, staring at the kid. If he had hit any other spot on his head, he'd be fine. But the way he smacked it sent him into a deep sleep. Chuck said he'd be awake sometime tonight. I said I'd be there.
"Alright Jeanie, thanks. I'll be right back."
She nodded as I walked out, she sat down and started to read a small book to herself. She didn't care as much, does she even know his name? What happens if he wakes up with her there? I should stay, I care. I care? I care for this kid? That word echoes in my mind...clear and distant it feels. I haven't truley cared in a long time. But, why do I care for him. I shake my head, it's just my concscience....I should have kept a better eye on him during training, yea that's it. I walk into the kitchen, everyone else is gone, so I sit and eat the supper Ororo prepare for me before she left.
***********************
Sometime around noon
***********************
Magneto, I can't believe he'd be foolish enough to fight us here.....at the Mall. Me, Cyke, Jeanie, Popsicle, the Elf, and Molecule. Not the Acolytes, but some small robot things, very agile. We're fighting as well we can. I hack and slash thru them, losing myself in rage. I see Cyclops and Jean doing ok, but the Elf is having a hard time since all he does is port....then I see Trek helpin' him out and I go back to concentrating on fighting. Then the unthinkable happens, I get thrown back by a robot and hit the floor....it gets me so mad that I rish and slam the robot into the wall with my claws, slicing it in the mid-section. I'm happy, till it changes to Molecule....to Trek. He's gasping, I think to myself that I was so mad with rage I started to see everyone as robots. He's trying to stand up but is leaning, and starting to sag. I grab him, and hold him up. All he does is look up at me and say "Good....shot" then he goes cold.
"NOOOOO!"
I sit up and scream as drops of cold sweat drip down. It's dark now....black. I look around and I can now feel the softness of my bed under me. I take a deep breath and lay back down with a flop. I can't go back to sleep now, so I get up....I throw on some sweatpants and walk out of my room, I'll go where I usually go when I have the bad dreams....the roof.
***********************
1am Roof of Institute, Sunday
***********************
I am laying up here alone, staring at the stars. The stars that are always there, so constant. I start to think to myself again. I've got to find out about my past, these dreams that usually consist of random images that scare the hell out of me, are changing. They're now mixed with me killing people I know. But, as I usually go back to sleep afterwards....tonight all I can think about is Trek. His looks, his voice, his smell. It's all so vivid. Why!? Why can't I get him out of my head. I like him.....no. I'm a man who likes women. Sure, I've fucked a few guys before, and had some give me a hand or blow job....but not in love, just when I needed it. But this is a 17 year old, I can't have feelings like that towards him!! I don't even feel that way towards Jeanie! Why do I feel like I like him.
Then there is a creak as the door opens, and I hear footsteps....it's him. Does he just magnetically attract to me. Then he stops and I can feel him looking down towards me.
"Mr. Logan.....I'm sorry, I didn't know anyone came up here."
"What are ya doin' up Molecule? It's way past curfew!"
"I know....but I needed to think."
"Think? Up here?"
Is he fooling with me?
"Yea, I come up here when I have a bad dream....or just need alone time."
Bad dreams....once again he hits close to home.
"Oh, fine....come on over than, what'ya dream about?"
"Nothing....."
"Nothing? Or Nothing you want to talk about!?"
He sits down beside me and looks up at the stars then looks down at me laying down, I feel nervous for some reason.
"I, dreamt.....about my past. In jumbles. It was like looking at a jigsaw puzzle in it's box, all jumbled and you try and look at all the pieces at once. Hehe, but you probably don't understand."
I reach out to touch his back, then I stop.
"Yea, I do actually. Happens to me too, it's cuz the past is locked away."
He looked at me, I put my hand back down. He smiled.
"Yea....exactly. Thank you..."
"For what?"
"For showing me, I'm not the only one out there who has this problem."
I smiled back at him, although he proll'y couldn't see it since it was getting darker. I feel good that I can help him. But then I feel nervous again....why?
"Eh, no problem kid-" I should send him to bed, but instead, I reach out and let him lay on me. He doesn't draw back he just does. He rests his head on my shoulder and leans in close to me. I don't know why I am doing this, I'm a man who likes women.....but he feels so soft against my hairy skin, he just lays there breathing. Is he wondering the same thing? I don't know....but I don't care now. Just let this moment be peacful, we both understand each other more now, and that's what matters.
We lay there for what seems like hours, just staring. Then I feel sleep taking me, so I sit up stirring Trek into half awakeness. I stand him up and he is so tired now that I have to pick him up. Again, I just stand there with him in my arms, it feels so nice to care for someone. Then I walk to the door, and down the stairs. I walk to my room not thinking and I am so exausted now. I make a sleepy decision to let Trek stay here, his room is all the way across to the other hall. I open the door and set him on the bed, he just turns over and falls asleep. I take off my sweatpants and slip into some shorts so I am not completely undressed as I usually do, but I do have SOME intellegence still. I lie down beside him and fall asleep, letting his airy guy scent fill my head as I nod off too.
***********************
7am My room, Sunday
***********************
I wake, and it takes me a few minutes to realize Trek is in my bed still. He had curled up againts me, and my arm had wrapped around his chest. Now, it feels right.....so good. Then I snap out of it, and I pull my hand away and he turns a little still asleep. I feel so bad, having Molecule here.....in my bed. He slept with me. Not that we did anything wrong, but he slept in my room in my bed, with me. I get up and put on my sweats from last night and throw on an undershirt. Walking to the door I look back at him, then I close it and walk down to breakfast.
I get down there and no one is there. They usually wake at 8am, the ones who like to attend church. I just wake up early. I sit in the Morning room and sip coffee, and think about him again. Why did I let him sleep there? With me? What will he say when he gets up? Do I, like him? No....it's something else. It was drowziness, had to be....yea I was just to tired to carry him to his room, it's all the way on the other end of the mansion. Yes, just exaustion from last night. Last night, how can I excuse that? We both seem to have much in common, but that cuddle session? I don't know....I just don't. I shake my head and concentrate on other things, like what I need to plan for next weeks survival class.
And hour later, The Elf pops in, says hi in his german accent, then pops out back to his room after grabbing an orange. Half-Pint comes in and pours herself some milk with cereal sitting down she says hi and eats quickly. Scott comes down with Jean and they sit down with some coffee and talk to themselves. After Scott and Jean left, Trek walked in. I glanced at him and he wasn't even looking at me, he popped some bread in the toaster and got out the peanut butter. Then drew the milk off the table from when Kitty had used it. She says hi to him, he says hi back. I wonder if he is trying to avoid me, worried about last night.....or if he hasn't realized that he was in my room yet. The rooms DO look all the same, the only difference is the possesions in the room. He might have not noticed my stuff so sleepy. Well it doesn't matter we'll talk sometime, and I will tell him nothing happened....and that it shouldn't, because we're Men who like Women. Right?
***********************
I didn't know it at the time, but someone had been watching ever since Trek had started befriending me, someone who was learning our schedule, our routine. Soon, they'd do something they'd want to forget if they were still alive...
1pm Outside, Sunday
***********************
They all come back, The Elf, Cyke, Jeanie, Rogue and Molecule....all back from church, I ask how it went and they all say fine, Kurt tries to adapt on it, but he doesn't remember, he only went to be polite, he's more of a catholic even tho they went to some non-denominational church. So I politely ask Trek. He looks up at me then away and just shrugs. Hank opens the door and Cyke hands him a video tape of the sermon. Of course Hank would love to go, but his appereance isn't the best for a church....and he's against the Holo-watch thing Kurt has. Well they all walk in, but I stand in front of Trek before he goes in.
"Hey, what'sa matter?"
"No...nothing, just don't feel like talking."
"Oh? Talking, or talking to me?
"....both....I guess."
"Look, are you worried about, last night?"
He nods "Yes, and this morning."
I sigh, I knew I shoulda taken him to his own room.
"Well, nothin' happened ok! I was just tired, and didn't feel like cartin' your heavy body all the way to your room when I was already at mine."
"Mr. Logan, that's not what I was worried about."
"Then why are you avoiding me?"
"Because.....because....I don't want, anything to happen!"
"Happen, what do you mean?"
Trek obviously feels uncomfortable, I can smell it on him. He's tense and his hormones are getting stronger, I know what he means but yet I ask. As if for self-assurance.
"I mean, what if I start to actually LIKE you. Last night, on the roof, I should have said no to you, when you toldme to lie down. But, I didn't, becasue it felt good. You and I understand each other in a way other people won't, but I don't think we should try and be something we're not."
WELL, that's a relief, he doesn't want me. I smile
"Look kid, I dunno what's goin' thru your head right now, but there is nothing between us. We talk on Saturdays and share common interests. And have some things about us the same. Also, what I did last night, was just care. It's hard, not knowing what you should know....and sometimes....all you need is care from someone."
There, that's why I held him last night, that's why I let him rest againts me, and that's why I let him stay in my bed that night. Yea....exactly.
"Oh...well, thank you. I'm glad we see eye to eye."
He just stood there, and I did too. Something needed to be said, but I wasn't sure what....till it was to late, and he moved, and I moved, and he was gone.
***********************
6pm Kitchen, Suppertime
***********************
Yum, Ororo cooked us up some good eatin's tonight. A big roast with some sorta tangy sauce on it. She also fixed two big bowls of Mashed potatoes with gravy, mixed veggies she had picked from the gardens she manages in the greenhouse, Rolls, and a salad. It was delicious I tell ya, 'Ro's the BEST cook I have ever met. All of the students eat at a bigger table in the Dining room, and the X-men sit in the kitchen. So we usually talk about current events and mutant's rights.....well THEY do, I sit and eat and then smoke a cigar and listen. Personally, I'd rather sit in the students room, they talk about funnier stuff then Charles and Cyke do. Of course, it's rude to state it so I just sit....and "listen" and add imput when asked. Which is not very often.
After supper the kids can go and play outside if they want. I walked out there to make sure they were ok, and not blowing holes into the ground with their powers.....which has happened a few times. I sit on one of the benches watching the guy students play soccer. Popsicle, Molecule, and the Sunny one are on one side, and Krispy, Multiple, and Cannonball are on the other side. Looks to me like Popsicles side is winning. The ball goes flying from one end to the other, looks like a normal game....for once. Well, until Popsicle froze Krispy's legs.....oh no....
"BOBBY! That's cheating!"
"Hehe, oh come on....we never said no powers!"
"Bobby's right...."
That's when it became mutant soccer. Trek ported past Bobby and popsicle passed it to him, scoring a goal. Krispy shot some of that "lightning" and it stopped Bobby in his tracks, so Sam kicked the ball over to Jamie who couldn't reach it, so he cloned himself and then....then everyone started arguing because technically, that IS breaking the rules since it is only 3 on 3, and Jamie just made it uneven. So...looks like I gotta correct it.
"HOLD IT! Game ends now!"
"Aw, come on Mr. Logan!"
"That's not fair..."
"We're having fun!"
"FUN! You are fighting over clones! Plus, look.....Cloneboy didn't MEAN to play unfair, and you are all mad at him, which makes him feel bad. You shouldn't yell at HIM!"
I didn't mean to get mad, but it worked. They all said sorry to Jamie, he shrugged. They decided to go do something else. Trek smiled at me and then ported off somewhere.
***********************
10pm Mansion, Curfew
***********************
"ALLRIGHT, School tommorow, everyone inside....curfew!"
They all mumble as they walk inside. Some dirty and some not. I watch them all, making sure everyone inside. Ray, Jamie, Kita, Jubilation, Amara, Bobby.....everyone. Wait, Trek.
"Cyke, I am gonna make rounds....Trek isn't inside."
"Logan, I think he came in early....I saw him port to his room."
I don't remember that....But I will check his room, just in case. I walk over and knock, no answer. Then Bobby, his roomie walks over.
"Mr. Logan? What's up?"
"You seen Trek?"
"Naw....not since our Soccer game."
He opened the door and switched the light on.....the place was a mess. And not like a teenager guy mess....someone had been in here. The window was open and the beds were unmade....the lamp had fallen too. Bobby looked at me then started to walk in, I stopped him.
"Wait kid...lemme smell around first."
I stepped inside and took a big whiff, whoever cam in hadn't been gone long. I could still smell 'em. It smelle oddly familiar and I thought it might have been Sabertooth, but this isn't his style....the window would be broken and things would too. Mangeto? No...he isn't that stupid....or this untidy when kidnapping. It had to have been someone I met a while back. Or maybe, someone from my past...then it happened. Flashes of my past zooming thru my head...table...hospital? readings.....men....scientists....one is smiling, evily....scared....fear....no! Then, I don't see anything, I feel myself lean forward and fly towards the floor as Bobby yells my name.
***********************
9am Infirmary, Next day
***********************
"Ooohhh....what....happened."
"You had a memory flash, and it knocked you out. Robert came and told me and I carried you here. You took quite a fall....smacked your head on the side of the table."
It was Hank...I tried to sit up but I felt his big hand push me back down
"No no Logan, You're in no condition to get up yet....like I said, you smacked your head on the sidetable in Jared and Robert's room. You were out cold but you started to bleed, your healing factor stopped it tho, but it was longer since you were unconscious....so you'll feel a little dizzy. Lay still and in about an hour you can get up."
"Hank....Trek's out there, been kidnapped. I gotta find him!"
I try to sit up, still can't concentrate long enough to open my eyes...and he pushed me back down. Iwas getting mad....and it gave me a headache so I laid down.
"Charles is talking with the other X-men, they can handle it. YOU on the other hand need to rest up."
I Finally got my eyes open and could see the room well enough, I looked and waited for Hank to turn his back before I sat up. He was right tho, I felt REALLY dizzy....and when I sat up that fast I leaned to the left and flipped right out of the bed....my head hit the floor and god did it hurt. I turn over and saw Hank looking over me with a smirk on his face he was trying to hide.
"Well, maybe NEXT time....you'll listen to me."
So I laid in the bed, the whole time thinking about Trek. Kidnapped, but not just a regular one....by someone from my past. I've had those memory flashes before and it happens when something I smell, see, or touch, is subconsciouslly familiar to me. The man who kidnapped Trek knows me....and I know him. He was probably another scientist on the Weapon X project. The last time I met one of them tho, it was a crazed old man who had control over a chip in my head! Who KNOWS how this guy is.
"Hank, it's been an hour....I feel fine....lemme go see about Trek."
"Logan, why do you care so much about him!? You don't hit me as the type to have personal interests in the younger generation."
"I'm not."
"Then why do you seem to favor him over the others."
"I don't, but....it's the fact that he favors me!"
"I don't understand?"
"He could have looked up to Cyke, or Chuck, or even you...but he finds me as his role model. Something I have never been to anyone. Most of the other students, even the X-men fear me as a leader. Kitty is the closest one who has gotten to being nice to me. But even SHE would rather be with the other students. But Trek....Trek takes time out of his day to just talk with me...about anything! He and I have a lot in common too. Also, he just makes me feel good about myself ok? I smile around him, and it's an honest smile....not just put on."
"Oh...I see...you honestly care for him."
"Yea, I do."
"Nothing more?"
"What? What do you mean by that?"
"I mean Logan....you don't have, any sexual feelings for him?"
"WHAT! NO! Not at all....that's not right Hank. He's a kid!"
"Logan, I know, and that's why I asked. I wanted to make sure it WAS just care for him, not anything more."
"No, I just care about him. Because he cares about me."
Hank nodded, and grabbed some clean clothes he had brought down, he tossed them to me and I changed.
"Thanks Hank.....oh and Hank, don't be tellin' any of the students about this. It'd ruin my rep!"
"No problem Logan, just do me a favor."
"What?"
"Find him Logan, and bring him back safe."
I nodded and ran out the door to talk to Xavier.
***********************
12 noon, Bayville
***********************
I convinced Charles I was in a good enough condition to go look for the kid. I started by getting the guys scent in Trek's room....and leaping out the window. I was SUPPOSED to go with Cyke and the others, but I didn't feel like being a team member....they'd just slow me down anyway. I ran as fast as I could thru the woods, zigzagging as I kept the kidnapper and Trek's scent. I ran until I hit a plain.....I could smell them, but it was in one spot....they must've taken a helicopter or something. I cursed the ground and thought about what I should do next.
I decided to go back and talk to Charles, while the other X-men tried locating him on their own. I ran back to the mansion and up to Charles office...I knocked.
"Come in Logan."
"Ya know Charles, that gets really freaky."
"Sorry...so you came back."
"Yea, looks like the kidnapper took off in an aircraft 20 miles out of the woods."
"So, you want me to locate Trek?"
I felt stupid, I should have asked him that before I took off.
"Yea.....I guess asking you first would have been the smart thing."
"Yes, but don't worry yourself, the other X-men didn't ask me either."
We walked to the elevator, then to Cerebro where Charles went inside and left me outside the door to wait. All I could think about is what was going on with poor Trek. Was he ok? Why hasn't he come back....his powers could help him. Who took him and why did he!? How is he connected to me? I felt so stupid for not keeping an eye on him. Why I don't know.....but I did. I felt like it was my fault he was taken. I got to close, again. I let someone be a friend and they get kidnapped. I shouldn't let it happen again, after I get Trek back.....I am going back to normal secretive Logan. Trek'll have to find a different role model. Xavier came back out and looked very solemnly at me.
"Logan, you must hurry....I found Trek but, he's very weak. Not like a tired weak, but a beaten weak. He is in pain, and to weak to help himself. He's in an abandoned military outpost right at the border of Canada....take the X-copter."
"No, I'll take my bike!"
"Logan, you may not get there in time!!"
"Listen Charles, if I take the Helicopter, I'll be spotted and shot down before I can get inside. I can ride my bike there just as fast, and be secretive about it."
"....... Alright Logan, but be quick."
"No problem Charles! Already out the door!"
I took off running to the garage, I flipped onto my bike, slipped my helmet on and drove off onto the open road. Zoomin past traffic till I reached a side road that I took north. Within 3 hours I was at the Canadian border. I hid my bike in a patch of brush and took off on foot in the snow, towards the base hidden behind some small mountains. It wasn't fun, because on top of having to sneak, it was harder because there were weapons hidden everywhere....I had to be extra stealthy as not to alert them to my presence. I only triggered one or two the first few minutes, but it seemed later on that every ten steps I would have a laser fire or some spinnig blades pop out. I finally reached the base. Well, I reached the fence surrounding it. But I was concentrating so hard on getting in, I hadn't noticed that a lookout had spotted me and thrown a sleeping gas grenade at me, and before I could react, I was out like a light.
***********************
Time unknown, Inside base
***********************
I woke up to find myself strapped to the wall, my hands spread out and upwards clamped by very tough metal bands, my feet were the same except downwards, about an inch from the floor. My body stripped of all my clothes and belongings, I looked to my left and saw them crumpled in a pile on a table....they looked like they had been gone thru. I was furious, so I naturally extended my claws, big mistake.
"GGRAAAAHHHH!!!!"
A shock so hard went thru my body. It hurt so bad, I retracted my claws. Then I heard the laughing. So evil, twisted....insane. A voice from the shadows followed, all that I could see was a little to my left and right, a light was shining on top of me and it passed in a small circle around me all else was in shadows. The voice, was gentle, but manly, and yet....crazy. It had that mad scientist tone to it, I hate scientists.
"Ah Weapon X, we meet again, you still have your same old charm....how charming, oh I made a funny HAHA!"
"The hell do you want with me! Where is Trek!?"
"What do I want with you? Nothing....just revenge. I plan to kill Trek."
"NO!! WHO ARE YOU!?"
The voice laughed again and stepped out of the darkness to my right, he was an old man....but not senior old, more like late 30's early 40's I guessed. He had a balding head, brown hair. He wore very ark goggles so I couldn't see his eyes, and he had a small beard, like one you get when you don't shave before work in the mornings. He wore a grungy lab coat, it had blood on it....and it smelled fresh, but I couldn't tell what it was from being so little. He walked up to me and looked straight at me.
"You need not concern about who I am, since you won't see me ever again after this."
"What....what did you do with him?"
"Your little boyfriend?"
"He's not a boyfriend....he's a student that you had no right to kidnap!"
"HAHAHA!! Oh, I don't have the right! Next time I will be sure to get a permit."
"Damn you, you better let me go or there is gonna be some serious hurtin' in store for you bub!"
"Me? My wrists aren't strapped to antimantium reflective bands. You pop those claws and the wristlets send a wave of shock thru you again."
All I could do was wait then, for the right moment....but what about Trek.
"What aobut Trek, where is he?"
"Trek!? He's in a cell....waiting his death out."
"Why would you kill him, he never did anything to you!"
"But you did....you did you beast!"
"I don't even KNOW you!"
"No, you do, you just don't REMEMBER me! You see Logan, I was one of the scientists in the Weapon X project.....which of course was you. Well, after you went mad....you killed many people."
"Not my fault, maybe if you hadn't fucked with my HEAD!"
"I'm not finished! You didn't kill me obviously, but....you did kill my family! My wife and two sons!! It made me so depressed....and I vowed after you escaped that I'd make you pay!"
"Look bub, I'm sorry I killed them....but it wasn't my fault, you and your experiment did it!"
"SHUT UP! I plotted to kill you when I found you...but when I DID find you I saw that you were a teacher of mutants!! Then, I saw him....the boy you call Trek. He looked up to you, and you let him get close! So now, I am going to kill him like you killed my family....and you'll never see him again!"
"NOO!!!! NO YOU CAN'T!!!*I popped my claws*GRRAHAHHHAAAAHHH*retract*"
"Don't try it Logan, you'll kill yourself trying. But I am going to make this much more painful for you then it was to me!"
".....how.....killing is killing."
"Oh, but it's the way you do it. While I was waiting for you, I had a little "fun" with Trek! See my stained coat....that's your little followers blood....you wouldn't BELIEVE the kind of fun I had torturing him!"
My blood was boiling....he had hurt the kid. And not just a slap....he had beaten him till he bled. It made me furious, I wanted to break free, but the bands were to tight, and my claws were under the power of the shocks, they got worse everytime I tried to break out too.
"You....sick bastard! GAAHHHH!!!"
The shock hit me hard....when it stopped I could feel myself sizzling. I could hardly breath.
"Don't call me names....this is not your place. This is mine, and I am in control! Now, back to what I was doing! So far I have done many things to him. He's gonna be one big scab by the time I finish....oh but he'll be dead then so it doesn't matter. But don't take my word for it, why don't I let you watch the tape we made!"
"You...recorded....it! You're so....twisteGAAHAHHHH!!!"
"Ah ah ah, be nice Wolvie!"
A Television on a wheeled table rolled over and the man stuffed in a tape and played it. He shocked me if I looked away or closed my eyes. It was aweful to watch, Trek's hands were tied behind his back in a way that they were tucked into tight fists, so he couldnt open them. He needed them open to use his powers. He was also blindfolded....all he had one were his blue boxer shorts, and they were already a bit torn. I watched as the man whipped him with a long black leather whip, each time Trek screaming for help....crying....to weak to fight back. I watched as the man twisted Trek in positions he shouldn't bend, and heard him scream in agony...for help....help I should have been there to give. but, that wasn't the worst part....I watched as the man ripped Trek's boxers off....and...and raped the poor kid, right in the ass. It was horrible, I hadn't noticed till now that I was crying, it wasn't right....it was evil and demonic! The kid was so young....and he was being beaten to death. I was so mad...so filled with fury that I extended my claws in one last effort to free myself, the pain hurt so much....the shock so hard. Then I heard the man.
"STOP! OR I KILL HIM NOW!!"
"huff....hufff.....you....BASTARD! He's just...a little....KID!!!"
"So were my boys....and my wife was my pride! You killed them!"
"I Killed them....with no THOUGHT! I wasn't me....I was under.....the influence...OF YOUR EXPERIMENT! You.....you did it thru thought! You raped him....you've defiled him!!!"
"And after I kill him, you'll feel my pain 10 times worse!!!"
He motioned at what I assumed was a man in the shadows, in a few moments I heard foot steps and the sound of dragging. Then a flump, I looked down by the man and there was Trek....beaten, bruised, bloody, and naked...kneeling lifeless by the man.
"Trek...Trek....look what you've done to him!"
The man took a deep breath and kicked Trek, a moan shot out from him as he toppled over into the darkness again. It hurt me more than Trek tho, to see him like that. His pride beaten out of him. All I could do tho, was be still and wait for my chance to break loose. The scientist walked right up to my face and whispered to me.
"I'll be back....to finish this, once I have some more "fun" with your little student!"
"No....leave him alone....he hurts enough.....already!"
Still it was no use, he was already gone. And all I could do was be still, tied to the wall in silence, and wait for them to come back.
***********************
Later, Inside Base
***********************
I had fallen asleep, sometime....how I don't know, since these bands were hurting like hell on earth now. I would have probably lost all feeling in them if I didn't have my healing factor, which I kind of wish I didn't right now since my arms hurt like a bitch. I just stayed there, waiting....my eyes adjusted to the darkness better now, and I could make some things out. There was a big table....and chairs....two doors on both sides. I could tell the place wasn't in use anymore, because I could smell mold and rot all over. Then I heard footsteps, he was coming back. He entered and noticed right away that i had adjusted to the darkness because I looked over at him and he was surprised I saw him.
"Well, you're finally awake. I finished with your student Trek a few minutes ago and he is doing....horrible. His death will be so painful for you I know."
All I could do was let out a low growl, I was so tired of his crap.
"Oh now now, let's talk!"
"About....what...."
"I want to know exactly how much you love the boy!"
"I don't....love him...."
"You don't? GUARD! Bring the boy in again and set him in that chair."
A guard left the room and came back dragging poor track by a rope wrapped around his hands, he rufly set him in a chair which made Trek swiftly grunt and then moan in pain. He was worse off then before....so bloody and beaten.
"When I break free, I am gonna tear you limb from limb! Look at him, he's just a kid!"
"Logan....don't make me shock you! Now, you say you don't love him?"
"I don't.....I care about him!"
"More than the other students at that school?"
"....."
The man pulled out a whipe and slapped it on Trek's knees, Trek fell off the chair trying to jerk away.
"Obviously not."
"Yes....I do...."
"Why? Why care for a young boy like him!?"
"Because he cares about me....let him go."
"No"
"You sick perevertGAAAHHH!!!!"
The shock, I forgot about it, but it didn't hurt as much as last time
"No name calling. Logan, do you love him?"
His voice was so twisted, he wanted to pull Yes out of my mouth so much, but I didn't know why.....but I wasn't about to admit it to him.
"No, I care about him! More than....the other kids."
"Why? Because he cares for you...."
"That's what I said!"
"So, you don't care about him, because of how he treats you?"
"What?"
"The way he touches you....or speaks to you."
"What the fuck are you talking about?"
"Don't you like it....when he holds your hand. Don't you like it, when he gets almost close enough to you, to kiss him?"
"WHAT!! What kind of sick question is that!? He's a KID!"
"Don't lie to me Logan, or I'll make his death a lot worse. I want to know, that you love him!"
"I DON'T! I just, care for him......a lot."
"I doubt that, it's much more Logan. You love it when he touches you. When he speaks softly to you. When he gets so close to you that all you can smell is him. When he is so close you could kiss him."
"No, it's not like that! Now let him go....please."
"Please!? Why do you want me to release him so much!?"
"Because...."
I almost said it, Because I love him. It was aparent in my mind now....that I did love him. not just in care, but that I wanted him to be mine. It was true....I loved him.
"Because WHAT Logan?"
"I love him...."
"What? Couldn't hear that!"
"I LOVE him....ALRIGHT! Let him go now!"
Although nothing had happened to me, I felt like I had just been defiled like Trek.
"hahahahaha, LET HIM GO!? Oh no, I just wanted to hear you say those things, to make sure I was killing the right person in front of your very eyes."
The scientist pulled out a gun from his pocket and aimed for Trek's forehead. This was it, if I didn't break free, Trek'd be gone.....forever. So, with the small amount of strength I felt I lunged forward, extending my claws....the shock came. At first it almost stopped me, but then it felt energizing almost. I could feel bands pulling away from the wall. The scientist looked over at me and pointed the gun at me, I laughed just a little. Then I felt them snap and instantly I clawed off my ankle bands and sweep kicked the guy before he could shoot. He dropped his gun andin one swift motion I had him up agains the wall, my left hand claws shoved so close to his face if he sneezed it was all over.
"You, are a sick, twisted, and perverted freak!! How DARE you abuse a poor defenceless kid like that!! TWICE!! You think what I did was wrong, so do I. But what you did was wrong, no matter HOW you felt about it! So now, you're going to die."
I would have killed him, if two big guys hadn't of tackled me. I hit the floor, but immediatly clawed both in the chest, killing them instantly. I jumped up, naked to the world...but the guy was gone. I would have run after him, but Trek was there on the cold floor, naked and bloody. I would get the guy some other time, Trek was my priority now.I carefully knelt down and untied his hands, then I rolled him slowly over and heard him groan.
"Trek, please speak to me."
"....M..ister....Logan?"
"Trek, it's ok now, lets get out of here."
"k....."
While I had time I reached over and stole the uniform off one of the dead guys, it fit a little loose but with some tucking I got it to work. I covered Trek in the other guys shirt and pulled him up into my arms. For the third time I stood still for a moment, but this time I wasn't worried about how I felt, now I was looking down into his eyes as he mouthed thank you, and closed them. I nodded and made a run for the outside.
Of course, when the guy escaped he alerted all the soldiers under his command to come after me, so a few feet out of the lab, I ran into 10 soldiers all ready and aimed at me. I thought I would have to fight, till Trek intervened. He lifted his hand up very slowly and the guns dropped and skidded over to me. One floated up and I grabbed and fired. All 10 were dead before they could run off. It was like that the whole way, the base was big too. Since I didn't know my way around I couldn't get out easily. but I finally made my way out, just in time to see the X-copter fly overhead and lower the crane with Cyclops in it. I plopped Trek in and told them my bike was still in the woods, he nodded and I ran off to grab my bike and beat it back home.
***********************
9am Wednsday, Infirmary
***********************
Well, he finally woke up after a day of sleep. I never left the room while he was either. I had also talked to Hank, and he understood my real feelings....but told me not to say anything, since it would give a bad rep to me as a teacher. I agreed and told him I would have waited till he was older anyway. He woke up and smiled when he saw me, he wanted to speak but he was to tired.
"Hold up Molecule, you've had quite a trama. You need to sleep more."
"Wait, I'm ok....really."
"....."
"Mr. Logan, thank you."
"No problem, it's my job."
"......" "I know it was more than that."
I blushed, he was right. But I couldn't let him now how I really felt. I sat down on the side of his bed and turned o face him.
"I care about ya Trek, cuz you take the time out of your day to talk with me and be a true friend."
"Oh, ok....good."
"Ok, now get some sleep, and I'll be right back with some soup."
I stood up and began to walk out, when Trek asked me...
"Logan, was what you said, about really loving me....did you mean it?"
I stood there not facing him, I should have said yes...I would have too, but I remembered what I had said to Hank. So I lied.
"Well, would the guy have stopped abusing you if I didn't say that? It's what he wanted."
"......yea...you're right. I understand, it's kool. Thanks"
"No problem, I'll be back with soup."
I walked out of the infirmary and Hank gave me one of those right thing nods, I just grunted. I stepped into the kitchen and put on my gruff attitude again.
About a week later everything was back to normal, Trek would talk with me more often...and I would act normal. But sometimes, when we both had bad dreams and ended up on the roof, I would hold him, and he would let me, and I never thought about it being uncomfortable again.
THE END