A/N: I'm trying something different with this. While I loved the movie In The Land of Women, the ending wasn't as satisfying as I wanted it to be. So, I decided to write my own. While some people may disagree for their own reasons, this is what I would have liked to see happen. You've been forewarned though if you haven't seen the movie, it gives away a lot of the plot. This takes place after Sarah is hospitalized, but before Carter's grandmother dies. Hopefully, you enjoy it as much as I did while writing it. As always, please let me know what you think if you took the time to read it. Thanks in advance.
As Lucy Hardwicke left the hospital that night, she couldn't deny the fact that she was a changed person. She no longer had to worry about carrying around that burden, the guilt that she felt for embarrassing her mother, the hatred she felt towards her for having been embarrassed in the first place. And she could honestly admit that it felt good. No, it really felt great. It felt absolutely amazing to know that everything was right between her and her mom. And her mom was going to live. But if all of this had happened, if she had experienced this "monumental" change, then why did she still feel so lost?
As she slid into her car and turned it on, she sat there for a minute thinking it over as she tried to come to a conclusion, any conclusion. It just didn't seem right to her that she would be able to finally move on when it came to her relationship with her mother but still feel so… empty. Still feel like she was missing a major part of herself. She decided not to let it bother her anymore as she slid in her O.A.R. cd, letting the music fill the silence of the car as she started driving in the direction of her house.
Driving had always been relaxing to her, a time when she could unwind and not have a care in the world. She had always loved to drive, ever since she had finally gotten her permit almost two years ago. But tonight, it wasn't like that at all. Her mind wouldn't stop recalling the things her mother had told her that night, just a half hour before, and it was starting to bother her. The one thing she couldn't forget was telling her mother that she didn't want to miss out on the part where she got to know who she was. And while she had meant what she said, Sarah wasn't the only one who she wanted to know better. And suddenly, it was so obviously clear just who she really wanted to get to know better. A lot better.
Her mind began to race as she drove faster, watching the people on the streets pass in a blur of color with no identity at all. Carter Webb was the boy… Okay, he wasn't a boy. Carter Webb was the guy across the street, but for how much longer? How many more of these nights would she have when she knew that a trip out to the roof would result in seeing his deep brown eyes? How many more mornings would lead to a conversation at the end of her driveway. How many more school nights would her parents bend the rules so she could go out to a movie with him? Carter had been right when he said he was mysterious, Lucy knew close to nothing about him. Sure, he had lived in L.A. and he had admitted to writing soft-core porn when Paige hadn't been around. And he had dated Sofia, the one who was only in a handful of independent films and was too important to use a "ph" instead of an "f" like normal people, but he wanted to worship the freaking ground she walked in. And that was when it really occurred to her: Lucy wanted him to do that to her.
She wanted to be the one that he wrote those sweet, sappy love letters to, even if she had told him that it made it seem like he was whipped when he told her. Hell, she wanted to be the one to tell him that she had him totally whipped. She wanted to be the one he couldn't stop talking about, the one he had programmed as #1 on his speed dial, the one he called constantly and talked to for hours. She wanted to be the one he woke up next to in the mornings, the one that he had pet names for, even though she hated the idea of being called "baby" or "sweetie" or "honey." More than anything, she wanted to be his.
She was thankful when she pulled into the driveway, and even more thankful when she saw that the light was still on in the living room, meaning her father was still up. With the tv on, there was a good chance he hadn't even heard her get home. Before she could change her mind and lose this adrenaline rush she was now feeling, she was running across the street and knocking on the door. She watched as the light in the front room of the house came on, waiting a minute until he finally opened the door. And the sight in front of her made it only so much harder to think about him leaving.
His hair was a mess, he had obviously been sleeping, and it made him look even more attractive, if that was even possible. He was wearing flannel pajama bottoms with a solid navy blue t-shirt and he was wearing his glasses, which she had thought before made him look adorable but hadn't said anything. The sleep disappeared from his eyes as he stepped out onto the front porch, obviously realizing that it was Lucy there this late at night. The concern that laced his words made her feel special again, like maybe she wasn't absolutely crazy for showing up here. "Is everything okay? Is it your mom?"
Lucy nodded quickly, biting her bottom lip as she looked back down to her feet. This was even more nerve-wracking than she had thought it would be, and she wanted nothing more than to have it all be over with. "My mom's fine… Well, she's in the hospital, but it's just a fever caused by the chemo… Sorta…" She watched as his concern turned into confusion, and she shook her head as if to wave away her own clouding confusion. "But that's not why I came. I…"
That was as far as she got before he cut in, throwing his hands up in the air. "What the hell do you think you're doing here so late at night!? Lucy, I completely freaked out thinking something was seriously wrong! I was asleep! Do you have any idea how late it is!?"
She nodded slowly in response, giving him a puzzled look as she recalled the time that had been displayed on her dashboard only a few moments ago. "Yeah…? It's a little after ten… On a Saturday night… Were you seriously in bed already?"
Carter's anger dissipated as he ran a hand through his already tousled hair, looking back down to his own bare feet. "You know, when you live with an 80 year-old woman, those senior qualities that you always found so amazingly annoying start to rub off…" She laughed softly to herself as she nodded in response, finding his humorous explanation just as cute as he looked in front of her. And that smile he flashed her when he met her gaze again… wow. She honestly thought she lost her breath for a minute as he spoke to her. "So, what do I owe this not-so-late night visit to?"
She folded her hands in on themselves, making fists as she let her finger nails dig into the soft skin of her palms, feeling just how clammy they were. She took a deep breath as she tried her hardest to keep eye contact again. "Well, I… I came to apologize, I guess… You had every right to be mad that I kissed you before, you had every right to act like that when I confronted you before, but I have to admit to something as well. I'm not sorry. I'm not sorry that I did it, or that I enjoyed it, or that I think about it all the time… I guess, what I'm trying to say is, I'm not sorry that I do have feelings for you."
She knew from the way he groaned this wasn't going to be the movie-script ending she had envisioned, completed with the passionate kiss in the rain. Well, that rain already wasn't going to happen, but a girl could dream. She watched as he pressed his hands to his face, removing his glasses and rubbing his eyes with his palms before replacing them. "Lucy, you're a great girl… But I can't do this…"
"Why not?" She interjected immediately, her enthusiasm showing as her words rolled off her tongue. "Is it because of the age difference?"
"Well, that's a start… You're 17 and I'm 26, that's nine years."
Lucy laughed, waving her hand as if to get rid of his concerns. "And by today's standards, that's nothing. We would be like the average couple."
He gave her a confused look, but he didn't wait long before starting again. "Well, you can't drink, you can't even buy those cigarettes that I happen to have a habit of taking hostage legally yet. I have a job, I've left the high school scene behind. You're still going to football games and looking forward to your senior prom. How could this ever work out?"
"Well, you're getting ahead of yourself, Carter. No one ever said that we were going to prom together." Seeing the glare he sent her, letting her know that she was missing his point, she started again quickly. "But, honestly. We could make this work. And the fact that you're pointing out these reasons to me shows me that I'm not alone in this. You have feelings for me too, Carter Webb, and you can't deny it. Because you've been thinking about me. A lot."
He sighed as he moved back on the small front porch, sitting on the corner that the front of the house and the tiny iron railing made where they joined. It was silent for a minute, and Lucy could feel her heart race. Maybe, just maybe, she had been right in her accusations. Now, he was thinking it over as well, trying to figure out if it would work or not. After a while, he finally spoke again, still looking at his bare feet. "Your mom saw us together… She doesn't want me seeing you."
Again, it was Lucy's turn to be confused as she processed this new information. Her mom didn't want them together? Hadn't her mom been the one to convince her to ask him out in the first place? And she had always expressed a strong dislike for Gabe. Why wouldn't she want her to be with someone else? It just didn't add up. "But… Why?"
She heard him sigh again as he didn't bother to look back over at her, and she felt like she could actually see the wheels turning in his head. "I don't know…" he finally mumbled, barely audible even though it was silent outside. She wanted to yell at him to just tell her the truth, to not treat her like she was 7 instead of 17, and that's when he spoke again. And nothing could have prepared her for what she heard. "I kissed your mom…"
She just stared back at him for a long moment, her eyes wide. She couldn't open her mouth for fear that her bottom jaw may hit the concrete beneath her feet. Her mom and Carter!? Didn't her mother know any better!? God, she was like… old. What had Carter been thinking? "Are you serious…?" It was a rhetorical question but he nodded anyways as she sunk down to sit on the edge of the porch, burying her face in her hands. "Oh my god… I honestly don't believe this… My life has just become Rumor Has It, and that wasn't even a good movie. It was just… Disturbing. Why couldn't my life be more like Win A Date With Tad Hamilton or How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days? God, it could be more like The Notebook or Titanic and it would be better than this…"
Carter moved to sit next to her on the porch, not saying anything for a long while. An apology wasn't going to fix this. No, it just wasn't that simple. After a long while he finally looked back over at her, waiting until she met his eyes before saying something. "Jack died in Titanic, Lucy. That means I die and you become a lonely, old, cold-hearted bitch. That's what you want?"
"God, only a guy would see only that angle to the movie… Yes, their love story was tragic, but Jack knew that Rose loved him when he died."
"Okay… So I know how you feel about me… Now I'm free to go drown in peace?" He watched as Lucy rolled her eyes in response, sighing to herself. This conversation was going so much worse than she even thought possible. Again, silence filled the void between them as they both gazed at her house right across the street. Eventually, he spoke again, his voice soft. "I'm not a good boyfriend. At all. Not even a little bit. I tend to become slightly obsessive and I have big expectations that can't be fulfilled. You're seriously saving yourself months of heartache and sleepless nights by leaving right now and going back across the street. You do realize that, right?"
She nodded, finally pulling her eyes away from her house where the living room light had just been turned off, replaced by the one in the upstairs hallway. As she met his eyes again, she felt the same spark, and judging by his expression, he had felt it as well. "But I'm still here, aren't I?"
"That you are, and to be completely honest, I have no idea why. It's like… you want to get hurt. Or something like that. In fact, I'm starting to think you may be a little crazy."
Lucy shrugged her shoulders as she leaned back on the porch, using her hands to support her weight. "Haven't you ever heard that saying? Why do I keep hitting myself with a hammer? Because it feels so good when I stop. As humans, we're drawn to pain and that's something I can't change. Besides, judging by your confession just a few minutes ago, I wouldn't be the only crazy one in this relationship…" She watched as Carter only nodded, his eyes not having looked over her at all the entire time she was speaking. She took a deep breath before she considered, staring up at the sky. "I'm not easy to get along with. I like things to go my way, so I guess I'm kind of a control freak. And I have my own insecurities that usually get in the way. I'm usually the one to end things too, even though it always hurts like hell. And you have to earn my trust, after you know, the whole "incident"… And you're the only person who knows about that." Feeling how heavy the moment was, she laughed a little, shrugging her shoulders again. "Besides, I have a thing for guys that fight for my honor…"
"See? That's where you're wrong. I may have taken that punch, but Eric was the one who stood up for you. He's the one who deserves your honor."
She shook her head as she met his eyes again, biting her bottom lip, a nervous habit. "No, that's where you're wrong. Eric may be a great guy who really does like me, but he's not the guy for me. He's too self-conscious and has no confidence whatsoever. I don't think I'll ever know how he was able to stand up for me like that. It just doesn't make sense. But I do know that I feel comfortable with you. I feel like I could really love getting to know you. I don't want to miss out on that."
This girl may have been much younger than him, but her words were really working for him. That was what he had felt about Sofia, but now she was saying the same things about him. Didn't he want to be with a girl who felt that way about him? He took a deep breath as he thought it over in his head, gazing back over at her. "What if… What if we make a deal? We give it a try, if it works, we know it was meant to be. If it doesn't, we let it go and we move on. Deal?"
Lucy nodded immediately, a smile gracing her lips. "Deal." As she went to go on, Carter pressed a single finger to her lips, shaking his head.
"One more thing. You have to promise to not throw me off doors into freezing colds oceans. Because, honestly, that scares me."
She nodded again, laughing to herself as she heard what he said. "I promise that I will never let go of your hand and let you fall to your death at the farthest depths of the sea, Carter Webb."
"Good… Then, I think this thing may just work." Before she could say another word, his eyes had connected with his and he turned his head to the side, slowly leaning in towards her. She leaned in as well, but it was Carter who closed the gap between them this time, letting his lips crash into hers with an intensity and feeling of passion she had never felt before and she doubted she would never feel again. Her hand fell to rest at the nape of his neck as she pulled him closer, not wanting this moment to end. She was just starting to get to know Carter Webb, and she wasn't planning on it changing anytime soon.
And as Carter kissed her… Well, he felt awake for the first time in his life. He knew that he was supposed to be right there on the small decrepit porch on a street in Suburbia with Lucy Hardwicke in that moment. It was just meant to be.