This is gonna be a series of severely idiotic drabbles that I write about doctor and master. Mainly, I'm gonna be using the tenth doctor. But the others will make an appearance as well.

read at your own risk.

Doctor lead the Master into his TARDIS. They were in yet another fanfiction where the Master didn't die at the end of LOFTL. Master was beginning to get sick of those fanfics.

Doctor, however, thought that they were brilliant.

Or should I say...FANTASTIC?! MAN, I'M CLEVER.

Anyways, Doctor sat Master down on the couch in the console room and then he took out a necklace-like thingy-mah-booper. The master sneered.

"And what exactly is that?" he spat at Doctor. Doctor wiped the spit off of his face.

"This? Oh...ummmm...Nothing...nothing..." Doctor muttered as he placed it over the masters head. Once the necklace was around his neck, it shrank so that it couldn't be removed.

" Just tell me what it is." Master hissed. Doctor rolled his eyes and put his hands on his hips, which made him look incredibly gay.

"It's a shock collar if you MUST know" doctor explained. Master glared at him angrily.

...actually...come to think of it...that's really the only way that you CAN glare at somebody...I mean...If the Master glared at him HAPPILY...that just wouldn't make any sense...

huh...

Moving on...

"And WHY do I need a shock collar? Isn't that a little...degrading?" Master asked. Soda is weird...I mean...like...really weird...BELCH.

"You need a shock collar so that I can control you. Normally I don't condone violence, but since this seems to be the only way to keep you in line...well...you know." Doctor said.

"I hate you"

"I love you too."

"What?"

"nothing"

"oh..."

There was a long awkward silence.

master coughed. Doctor shifted his weight from foot to foot.

Master tackled him to the floor and they began to make out viciously and take off each others clothes.

Suddenly, Rose walked in and threw her arms in the air.

"AW C'MON! WHAT THE HELL?!"

Doctor turned around to look at her. He sneered.

"GO MAKE ME DINNER, WOMAN." he growled. Rose burst into tears and ran away sobbing about how nobody understood her. She would later schedule an appointment with Dr Phil.

Master grabbed doctor by his face.

"Ooh, I do ADORE the aggressive side of you doctor." He whispered whilst wrapping his arms around doctor.

Doctor promptly shoved him away and stood up angrily.

"AND YOU! YOU WITH YOUR 'CHAN' AND 'THOUGH'S! YOU DRIVE ME INSANE!" doctor screamed. Chanthough ran away crying. Master looked at her perplexed.

"I thought I killed her..." He muttered. Doctor glared down at master and kicked him in the side.

"SHUT UP BITCH. IF I WANT YOU'RE OPINION, I'LL GIVE IT TO YOU!" he bellowed. Master winced and began to sob uncontrollably.

"I...I c-can't help it doctor...puh-please don't hurt me again!" master winced. And suddenly, he was covered in scraps and bruises and such.

Doctor grinned. Man, those boo-boo's on the master really turned him on.

Russel T Davies observed what was going on. He shrugged. It made about as much sense as any other episode.

I'm sorry.

I'm so sorry.