The war is over, but even though we're celebrating, inside my mind, I'm far from celebrating.

I'm so confused...I'm Shinigami, right? Everone I ever care for dies.

And yet, somehow, everyone I've grown close to in this war is still *alive*. And very much so.

Why? The things I thought were truth...absolute...are not.

You'd think Heero would be the one who wouldn't be able to adjust to peace. You'd think I'd be able to adjust rather easily.

But I don't know if I know how to live without being Shinigami anymore.

Maybe I just need to learn. Maybe it will be as easy for me as everyone seems to believe. Maybe not.

I suppose only time can tell. But, I fear that even if I settle down, become a 'normal' civilian, deep inside I will always be 'Shinigami'.

Forever.