Author's Note: Hey, all. This is just something I concocted one night when I was bored. Hope you enjoy it, and don't forget to drop a review to tell me how you feel!

Disclaimer: Not my characters. Please no sue.

"Weee are faaamilyyy!" Fai's slurred and jubilant voice rang out as he rocked from side to side, Sakura flushed and smiling under one lanky arm.

Where he'd heard the song (or maybe he was just making it up) Kurogane didn't know. One thing was for certain, however: alcohol was being banned in this household, and no whining from Fai was going to change his mind.

They'd been drinking all afternoon. The search for the feather was at a standstill until the typhoon sweeping through this city had passed. The rain and wind had even become so severe now that going outside was a no-no, so shopping for supplies was out of the question. Luckily, the house already had a good store of canned food when they'd leased it, and had (probably unknown to the landlord) a fair stock of wines and liquors. When it became apparent that their search was postponed indefinitely, Fai brought the liquor stash to their attention and suggested they may as well throw themselves a belated welcoming party.

Kurogane wasn't entirely against it at first. They'd all drank several times, often to the point where they entered that contented, drunken state that let them all be happy and forget their duty for a short time. Kurogane didn't see the harm in that. But then again, it had been awhile since they'd allowed themselves the luxury, and Kurogane forgot how obnoxious two of his companions could be.

And now those two were singing that horrible song. Over and over. For the past twenty minutes.

Luckily, Syaoran was much like himself. After a few drinks, the boy kind of turned inward. He'd speak when spoken to, but mostly he'd just watch Sakura, smiling and laughing quietly when she did something silly in her alcohol induced haze.

Though Kurogane was similar, he certainly didn't glue his eyes to Sakura for the whole day. Rather, he watched everyone with apprehension that eventually changed to (though he would never admit it, a very paternal) concern for their safety and mild amusement. Tonight, however, Kurogane still hadn't drank enough to move beyond the apprehension, and instead of turning toward amusement, it was dissolving into annoyance. Obviously, he needed to take larger gulps.

The pork bun was on the couch beside Syaoran, rolling around slowly and humming quietly to itself. Kurogane thought it was that balloon song, but he didn't want to listen any closer to find out. He was only thankful that it wasn't joining in the "family" chorus.

When the off key singing became too much for him to bear, Kurogane shouted "Oi!" and approached the duo. When the smiling mage tried to make it a trio, Kurogane pinched his ear, pulling him away from Sakura, who, without Fai's support, listed sideways to the floor where she meowed pathetically.

Over on the couch, Syaoran let loose a string of giggles.

Kurogane began dragging the weakly struggling Fai, who had quickly mimicked Sakura and was meowing in pain. Sakura, still on the floor, rolled toward Fai, hitting the back of his legs. With his balance already compromised by alcohol, Fai pitched forward, freeing his ear from Kurogane's firm hold, and fell to the floor with a loud thump (somehow twisting to land on his back, very much unlike the animal he was imitating) and the squall of a frightened cat. Exasperated, the ninja looked down at the two in distaste and considered just letting them be.

Sakura, in response to Fai's scared cry, mewled and crawled on all fours to the blonde's side. Seeing Sakura, Fai meowed sadly, to which Sakura responded by meowing sympathetically and nuzzling her head against his hand. Fai slid the hand into her brown locks, meowing happily as he ran his hand through her hair. Kurogane thought he might have heard a purr from the girl before she mewled again and crawled over Fai, half-falling as she slid one leg between his. Kurogane watched with frozen horror as Sakura nuzzled Fai's neck, earning a purr from the man, before she started to rub up against him like a friendly cat, licking his cheeks and chin. Fai was meowing and laughing.

Kurogane was disgusted and shaking. Breaking out of his stupor, the ninja pulled Sakura off Fai by the collar ("Mrrowl!") and deposited her on the floor ("…Meow?"). Then he seized Fai by the upper arms and hoisted him over his shoulder, much to the blonde's displeasure ("Reeeow!"). With the thought of another tall drink, Kurogane carried Fai to the couch that wasn't already occupied and flopped him onto the cushions.

Kurogane poured himself another drink, shaking his head at Fai's questioning eyes. The blonde pouted and made as if to grab the glass, but Kurogane anticipated this and held it just out of his reach. This resulted in the blonde being in his lap, hand outstretched toward the glass until he finally realized that the drink was too far away, and Kurogane still too quick. Then, as if realizing where he was situated, Fai smiled at the ninja coyly.

Kurogane sniffed. "Don't tell me the princess's little display turned you on?"

Fai's smile fell. "Wha' would you know 'bout wha' turns me on?"

Shrugging, the ninja took a long chug of tangy liquor. Fai sounded a little testy, so Kurogane thought it might be wise to say nothing. Besides, he couldn't answer the question anyway.

They sat in silence for awhile. Kurogane watched the kids as he drank, starting to feel his mind slip into that comfortable daze. Sakura was still crawling on all fours, exploring the room from a new perspective. She soon encountered Syaoran, who smiled affectionately at her and let her sit on the couch beside him. While Mokona mixed the girl another highball of its own devising, Sakura continued her feline seduction with Syaoran as her willing victim.

After another hour and two more drinks, Kurogane just didn't care. His veins tingled pleasantly, and he was tired of saving everyone from themselves. Luckily, though, Sakura was looking a short stint away from sleep.

Fai frowned as he watched Mokona pry the kids apart long enough to pour a mystery concoction down Sakura's throat. Sakura meowed in gratitude and went back to licking the dazed-looking Syaoran's neck.

"That seems indecent," Fai remarked. At least he was starting to sound more sober.

Kurogane grunted. "More decent than what she was doing to you earlier."

Fai looked as though he wanted to remember, but the signals weren't transmitting in his brain. Instead of dwelling on it, he laid his head on Kurogane's shoulder and sighed.

"What?"

"Why don't we go to bed," Fai said.

"Are you tired already?" teased Kurogane with a smirk. Usually the blonde's energy let him drink for more than half the night.

"No," replied Fai, and something in the way he said it clued the ninja in on exactly what he meant. The mage's vibrant blue eyes found his. "They look like they're having fun," he stated, trying to make the observation sound unrelated, but Fai simply wasn't a convincing liar when he was drunk.

"I thought you were sobering up," Kurogane huffed. Fai loved to hit on him when he was too wasted to have any self control. It made him yearn for the subtler Fai, and the cat-and-mouse game they often played (or dog-and-cat, as Fai would have pointed out.)

"I am," Fai drawled, but now he knew Kurogane had gotten the hint. Truthfully, he was floating in the pleasant after-buzz – that state between wasted and buzzing. Having gathered some of his senses, he was intrigued by Kurogane's indifference to what the children were doing. Was Kurogane now further gone than he? So he asked, "Aren't you going to stop them?"

Kurogane shrugged and took another long pull on his drink. "We're not their parents, as much as you like to pretend. They can make their own choices."

Fai frowned and turned toward the other couch. Apparently Sakura was choosing to give up on her cat guise and kiss Syaoran outright. Syaoran, in heaven, was underneath her, holding her to him.

"They're drunk, Kuro-kuro. There's nothing to stop them from having sex right there in front of us." Fai slid off the couch and, swaying, made his way over to the children. He coaxed Sakura off of Syaoran (insistent when she didn't want to go) and lifted her carefully into his arms. Shakily, he managed to get her into her room for the night. Syaoran, however, he didn't carry. Instead, he murmured things too low for Kurogane to hear into the boy's ear and eventually Syaoran followed him to his own room. When Fai emerged a moment later, he was looking a little more sober and a little more tired.

Kurogane saw Fai approach him with a characteristic grin. The mage held out his hand and said, "Now you."

But Kurogane wasn't one to be made to do anything. He merely locked eyes with the other man and wondered when their roles had reversed.

"Surely little Kuro-wanko is sleepy?" the blonde teased.

Amused and up to teasing too, Kurogane said, "No," in that lilting, hinting way that Fai had done to him not long ago.

Fai paused, peering at him curiously as though he hadn't heard him right. Kurogane only stared right back, taming a smile.

Fai shook his head, golden hair falling in his face. It looked soft. "Let's go." He grabbed the ninja's upper arm and tugged until Kurogane relented and stood unsteadily. The mage's wiry arm wound round his neck companionably to lead him down the hall and into the room they shared. Fai tried to deposit Kurogane onto his bed, but the other man held on to his waist for so long that he finally had to ask, "Is something wrong, Kuro-chu?"

Kurogane's gaze was slightly unfocused as he looked at Fai. "You're just cute when you have a little sense," the ninja said and turned away, a blush spreading along his neck and cheeks.

He was hammered. That could be the only explanation. Fai tried not to let the comment affect him, making light of it by chiding, "Well, one of us has to."

Kurogane rolled his eyes as he settled onto the edge of the bed. "She would have fallen asleep before too long."

"Or she might not have and you'd be Kuro-ojii in nine months." Fai patted the ninja's spiky hair. "I guess we'll never know."

Kurogane grumbled but didn't argue further. He grasped Fai's wrist, lying back on the bed slowly before giving a brief jerk to indicate that Fai was supposed to follow suit. But the blonde would do nothing but stare at him until Kurogane asked, "What are you doing?"

"I'm going to my bed," he said, sounding uncertain.

Was the man really this dense? Holding in a sigh, Kurogane said, "I thought you wanted to come to bed with me?"

"I…" He wavered, sadness in his eyes. "But you're drunk…"

"I'm not drunk," insisted Kurogane, but his voice was slow and careful. It was true, though; he was merely quite buzzed.

Fai didn't believe him. He was sick of making mistakes. "I'm not going to have sex with you when you're drunk."

Damned double standards. "But you'd let me screw you while you're plastered?"

Fai glanced away. "I wouldn't regret it," he replied quietly to himself, almost too low to hear.

But Kurogane's keen ears caught it. It might have angered him to think that Fai would believe Kurogane would use him for a night, even if he didn't have a firm sense of mind, but such reasoning was characteristic of the blonde. Kurogane let his wrist go. Fai would just have to be taught that not everyone cared only for themselves. "Lay with me, Fai. That's all."

Shutting his eyes to the world, Kurogane waited for Fai to either retreat to his bed or accept his offer. Silence fell over the two for a moment, and Kurogane wondered whether the mage had gone already. Then the bed dipped, and he felt Fai tentatively seeking a clear spot to lie down, and he smiled in the darkness.

"It's my bed. Did you really think you'd get half of it?"

"Kuro-tan's as mean as always," he quipped amicably. He settled onto his side, resigning himself to a night half-stretched over the ninja. His blonde head fell comfortably into the dip between the ninja's chin and shoulder.

Contented for the moment, and resolved, Kurogane drifted to sleep with the surprisingly pleasant cool wind of the smaller man's even breath blowing over his collarbone.