A/N: I wrote this one-shot to celebrate watching the original series for the second time. I realized that, though A:tLA is technically a kids' TV show, Zuko and Mai have always been and/or had the potential to be a very mature, well-developed couple with a profound romance. I always wished the series would have gone into these two characters more, but I know that Zuko and Mai were at the age where their relationship would have been too complex - and probably erotic - for the show. Besides, they were still antagonists and secondary characters for the majority of the series. Ultimately, I understand why it couldn't happen.
Still, by the end of the Book of Fire it was obvious to me that there was something worth discovering in their relationship. Zuko was arguably the first character to romantically mature when he sacrificed love to keep his beloved safe, and later earned the right to reunite with her. Mai was the second, when she was willing to give up everything for Zuko's sake despite her birth and upbringing.
In tribute to this intriguing and admirable couple, and in my personal desire to continue their story, I found the inspiration to write this fanfiction. Out of a desire to share these sentiments with a community with similar interests, I published it here.
Enjoy.
For Zuko and Mai. Their story continues in the imaginations of lovers everywhere - in this world, or any other.
An Afternoon Alone
"One-one-hundred."
He loved to watch her when she was annoyed.
"Two-one-hundred."
Her thumb twitched again beneath his, and Zuko tightened his grip. Her brows drew together in an irritated scowl.
"Three-one-hundred," he proclaimed, meeting her displeasure with a lazy smile. "You lose again."
Mai jerked her hand away from his and folded her arms, turning her back to him. "Whatever," she grouched. "I don't know why I play this stupid game with you, anyway. Thumb war." Her scoff of disdain made clear what she thought of it.
Zuko leaned back on the couch and pulled his fiancé towards him gently. She resisted, but more out of habit than unwillingness. Her arms stayed tightly crossed beneath her breasts. He said nothing, simply held her until her tight shoulders relaxed and her expression softened again.
"Well, at least you're more laid-back, if a little childish." Mai said finally. "It's a nice change from you yelling at everyone all the time."
Zuko frowned. "I don't yell all the time."
Mai twisted her head around so he could see an eyebrow lifting skeptically. "Don't you, now? When you and Azula were arguing this morning everyone down the hall and out the courtyard could hear you cursing and whining."
Zuko's frowned darkened. "I definitely did not whine."
Mai rolled her eyes. "Whatever. Point is, you seem happier, and it's a good thing. You don't have to believe it." Zuko twisted his mouth slightly in irritation, but thought better of replying.
Mai looked around again when he didn't say anything. She eyed him quizzically, as though surprised that he did not retaliate. After a moment she smiled, and stretched up to plant a soft kiss against his lips. Zuko's brow smoothed, and he smiled back at her gently. Content, she stretched out against him, her eyes fluttering half-closed languorously.
In the comfortable silence that fell, Zuko let his mind drift, and immediately regretted it. A glow of contentment surrounded him, but on the edges lurked half-formed shadows and doubts, waiting for a moment of weakness. When his thoughts wandered, they leapt into focus. Regret. Shame. Humiliation.
He clenched his jaw in frustration, but said nothing, not wanting to ruin the mood.
Mai must have sensed something, because she suddenly turned around and touched his cheek lightly, her serene countenance betraying a hint of worry.
"Zuko, what's wrong?" She asked softly.
Zuko turned his head slightly so that her fingertips did not rest on the scarred side of his face – an old habit of shame, and involuntary. It was a mistake. Understanding flashed across her eyes, followed by a quick succession of emotions – sadness, compassion, and something that he could not define, except that it seemed pained – before she settled into her characteristic blank, calm expression.
"Nothing," he muttered, a lie spoken out of habit rather than intent to conceal.
Mai sighed with exaggerated impatience. "You might be able to fool the idiots that worship you in this palace, and even Azula, but you can't fool me. Something's been bothering you since you came home." Her hands cupped his face gently, turned him to face her, and pushed his hair back from where he had unconsciously let it fall over his scar. Zuko complied reluctantly. He was not afraid of letting her see, but old habits did not distinguish between lovers and other people.
She misunderstood the reluctance. "You're hiding something," she accused. It was a guess, but an accurate one. Zuko made a frustrated sound in his throat and turned away from her again, forcefully this time.
"I'm not hiding anything." It came out sharper than he had intended.
She stiffened, her face suddenly a degree cooler. Zuko took a deep breath and, with an effort, moderated his tone. He would not snap at Mai.
"I've just been…thinking about some things." Much better. His chest was tight with the unfamiliar feeling of restraining his temper.
After a moment, concern returned to Mai's eyes, replacing coldness. "Like what?" When he hesitated she leaned closer, her hands massaging his shoulders with an odd sort of tenderness. "Talk to me."
Zuko sighed. "I don't know," he admitted, covering his eyes with the back of his hand. Dull needle points pulsed in his temples, the beginnings of a headache. "I'm not sure, Mai. I'm not sure of anything right now."
"What do you mean?" The tone of her words brought his head up. He rarely heard so much emotion in her voice. There was worry, and something else. A note of pleading, even fear. "What aren't you sure about?"
Zuko blinked, taken back. "I don't know, all sorts of things…my whole life right now. Look, it's complicated, why don't we –"
For some reason, that made her eyes narrow in anger. Bewilderment replaced his frustration. Why would she be angry?
"What's complicated?" She sat up, pulling away from him. "If you're not sure about something, Zuko, please let me know so I can leave you alone until you figure it out." She bit out the words, each so cold he half-expected frost to form in the air between them.
Zuko just sat there for a moment, frozen in surprise. Then he recognized the stiffness in her shoulders, the tightness in the corners of her mouth. If she had been a cat, her hair would have been standing straight on end, her tail straight and stiff as a rod. She thought he wasn't sure about her.
Relief washed through him, followed by a twinge of annoyance that he was relieved that her displeasure was misplaced, and a burst of affection for her, even though she was angry at him. Perhaps especially because she was angry.
"Mai," he reassured her softly, "you misunderstood. Whatever I'm not sure about, it's not you. It will never be you." He leaned forward and pressed his lips to hers. She did not respond, or pull away. "A lot of things have changed in my years away…things I thought I knew. I'm just having a hard time reconciling some of those with my life now. That's all."
The steely look in her eyes softened a little. "Really?"
"Really." He smiled as confidently as he could and kissed her again, satisfied when she returned the kiss and even drew his lower lip between her teeth briefly before pulling away. "I'm sorry if it sounded like I was having second thoughts about us." The apology came reluctantly, but that, too, was habit. He was sincere.
Mai, for some reason, took on a contemplative look. "I see, she said slowly. She caressed his cheek, lingering over his scar. He made sure to not flinch, or pull away.
"A lot of things changed, indeed," she murmured, almost to herself. "Sometimes I wonder…" she trailed off, as though debating with herself. Whatever she was about to say, she shook her head and dismissed it. "I won't ask, and I won't force you to tell me anything you don't want to. But is there anything I can do to help?"
Zuko shook his head. "I'll be fine. I'll get over it." he leaned closer to her, his lips brushing against hers teasingly. "Although, I would like it very much if you could lay back down with me."
Mai laughed wryly. "I think I can manage that." Zuko held his arms out to her. She turned around and sank back against him, wrapping his arms around herself like a blanket.
Zuko focused on her warmth and softness in his arms and shoved the dark thoughts away into the back of his mind. He could torment himself with guilt and regret and such later, when he was not with her.
Silence set back in, time floating past aimlessly while the late afternoon sunlight cast its warm glow over them. Occasionally, Zuko reached over to the nearby tea table, picking up a fruit or pastry and slipping it to Mai. She ate from his fingers without moving, a pampered cat enjoying the service of her owner.
After some minutes had gone by, she turned slightly to contemplate the treats their servants had laid out for them.
"Get me a chocolate, Zuko," she sighed, her voice as lazy and content as her half-shut eyes.
When he held the chocolate to her lips, she stretched up for it, her teeth grazing his skin. She held his wrist in her slender fingers, pulling his hand closer, and dragged her tongue lazily over his fingertips. In spite of himself, Zuko laughed.
Mai blinked and let him go, snuggling back down with a small half-smile on her lips. "What?"
He gave her an affectionate squeeze. "Nothing. It's fun when you tease. But don't do that again."
Mai turned in his arms to face him, propping her chin casually on her hands as her body pressed against his. The innocence on her face screamed guilt.
"Do what, Zuko?"
He returned her taunting smile and took her wrist in his larger hand, bringing her fingers to his mouth.
"This," he murmured, and slowly drew her index finger between his lips. Her gaze did not waver, but he felt the quickening of her heart against his chest as her breath hitched. "Not unless you're done cuddling."
Mai smirked. It was an expression she wore often in battle, but the desire in her eyes was for him and nothing else.
"Maybe I am," she said softly, leaning forward to kiss him. Zuko returned the kiss slowly, lazily, his palms wandering down the curves of her sides to rest on her hips. Mai arched her back a little, and he let his hand slide up her spine to rest between her shoulder blades, pulling her against him.
Mai broke away first and straddled his waist, supporting herself on her thighs to free her hands. Her fingers glided over his face, over the hard, rough flesh of his burn scar, and traced the line of his jaw before following his jugular down.
Zuko exhaled softly and tilted his head back, feeling the coolness of her fingers contrast with the warmth of the sun. Heat flickered to life in his chest, and deeper still in his abdomen where his breath, his chi, gathered and pooled between each inhale and exhale. It was the same heat he felt when firebending – alike, but different; two sides of the same passions. His temperature rose several degrees.
Mai felt the change, the arousal in him. Her smile widened; she liked his firebending, liked that it made him so easy to read, his excitement so obvious. Other men and women might lie with words, and even their bodies, but Zuko could never fake his desire for her.
She bent her head down, accepting the invitation of his exposed throat. She pressed her lips against the soft skin and slid a hand behind his neck, tangling her fingers in his hair to hold him still.
Zuko sucked a breath in between his teeth as she pressed butterfly kisses down the curve of his neck, marking him with nips and an occasional sucking motion that made his nerves jump to attention. Her tongue flicked into the hollow at the base of his throat, and he jerked as though electrified. The pain in his scalp froze him in place. Mai tightened her fingers into his hair, punctuating the silent command with a sharp bite at his shoulder.
When she was satisfied that he would not protest, Mai released him and sat up, her quick hands deftly untying the silk belt that bound his robes together.
Struggling to maintain her aura of regal indifference, Mai pulled the elastic from her hair, letting the long locks fall freely down her back. She tossed the elastic aside and pushed Zuko's robe open.
She simply sat for a moment, drinking him in with her eyes – the smooth sweep of his chest, the taut shoulders that silently testified to long and stern training, and the washboard stomach that rippled and clenched as she traced its ridges with her fingertips, her nails scraping slightly along his skin.
"Mai," Zuko breathed softly. The single word was a warning. She shifted and froze when she felt his arousal pressed against her hip, the heat from his body obvious through the flimsy silk of their robes.
Mai looked up at his eyes from under her lashes and was dimly surprised to realize that she was breathing hard, almost panting through her parted lips. "Sit up," she commanded, hoping that her voice didn't waver.
He was upright almost before she spoke, helping her part his robe until the crimson and gold folds fell from his shoulders. He wore nothing underneath. She was also naked under her robe, and from the way his gaze raked over her, nearly scorching in its intensity, she knew that he knew.
She moved back a few inches and reached down to grasp his shaft lightly with her hand, holding it as carefully as she would a live flame.
His sharp intake of breath encouraged and emboldened her. Hovering above him, her knees spread apart to hold her weight, she let her fingers glide along his length, barely touching the skin with her nails. Zuko grabbed her wrists and tried to guide her hand, but she slapped him away and resumed her maddeningly slow, light caresses, rubbing her thumb over the head with each upstroke to stimulate the tight bundle of nerves there.
His eyes narrowed, and he took hold of her wrists again, his palms almost painfully hot. There was such a fine line between lust and destruction for firebenders that he was always on the precipice when he was with her like this, always walking a razor's edge between cruelty and love.
He pulled her hands up and fell back suddenly, taking her off balance. Mai caught herself, staring down into his eyes as she held herself just inches above him. His hand was at the small of her back, holding her down while his other hand pulled impatiently at her robe, yanking the folds aside until he could slide his palms along her bare skin. The heat of his hand against her stomach made her inhale sharply.
"No," she hissed, resisting the pressure of his hand on her back, "not yet."
"Yes," he growled, his voice several octaves lower than normal. The cords in his arms tightened. "It's been too long, Mai." A shadow of sadness passed briefly over his expression. "You don't know – you can't imagine – how I've wanted to hold you. How I've wanted you like this..."
The ache in his voice reached through the haze of lust and invoked a deep sorrow for him, for their time of separation. "I think I do know, Zuko," she said softly.
His face softened for just a moment, then desire replaced vulnerability once more. "I'll be more patient later, but not right now."
Mai tensed her thighs in response, refusing to budge. "I'm not ready," she protested, mostly out of habit.
Zuko moved his hands to her hips, pushing her back until she felt him pressing against her, hard and so hot against her skin that the discomfort made her squirm. "Then try to relax," he replied breathlessly, ignoring her soft snarl of protest.
His hips pushed up, and protest turned into a gasp as the breath left her lungs in a rush. Mai bit her lip and squeezed her eyes shut, trying to hold still.
He was inside her. Every survival instinct screamed at her, as always, to tear away from him; insisted that he would not fit, she could not do this – but the pleasure flooded her limbs, a white glare burning away inhibitions like mist in the sun, and she had to focus on the small bloom of pain just to keep herself from grinding down on him.
It was just the tip, really, but it was almost too much. His skin was burning, just a hair short of unbearable.
"Zuko," she gasped, "too hot."
His eyes were narrowed, his brows drawn together in fierce concentration. "I'm sorry," he managed between clenched teeth. "I'm trying." Flames were flickering under his skin, pulsing with every ragged breath. Zuko closed his eyes, struggling to even out his breathing and rein it in. Mai sighed almost inaudibly in relief when his body finally cooled.
Zuko's eyes flew open again in surprise as Mai's mouth covered his, stifling his groan. She moved her hips against his, suddenly eager, trying to take him in further.
"Mai, don't," he panted, "I'm trying to –"
"Move," she ordered, her eyes blazing with uncharacteristic demand. "Trust me, I'm ok, and I've waited long enough. Move."
That was all the permission he needed. Bracing himself with his hands on her hips, he thrust up into her, as deep as he could go with the first motion. Mai cried out and arched against him, torn between pulling away and pushing down to meet him. Zuko took a deep, shuddering breath and squeezed his eyes shut, willing himself to not push any further, to let her adjust.
Mai paused, her muscles taut as she held herself motionless. She took several unsteady, shallow breaths, relaxing by slow increments until she was no longer resisting him. Her hips moved experimentally, and Zuko bit back a moan as he slid a little deeper into her.
Suddenly unwilling to wait any longer, he rose up swiftly and flipped them over so that she was beneath him. She fell back against the couch with a soft grunt and winced, shifting her legs to accommodate the new angle. Zuko sat up, as much as he could while still mostly buried inside her, and quickly moved his discarded robe out of the way.
"Come here," Mai murmured, reaching for him. Zuko settled over her and let her slide her hands around his shoulders, the muscles in his back flexing against her palms as he kissed her. He wrapped his arms around her, one hand firmly grasping her shoulder to hold her down, the other forming a gentle grip in her hair to press her head against his shoulder as he pushed forward.
Mai sank her teeth into his shoulder, muffling her moans as he moved with deliberate slowness, stretching her with just enough pressure to tiptoe the fine line between pleasure and pain before pulling back again. He worked himself in, a little deeper each time, then stopped again. He whispered soft encouragement into her ear and pressed open-mouthed kisses against her neck and shoulders, distracting her. Sweat glistened on his skin, and his jaw was a hard line of self-control so tense it was almost pained, but his embrace remained gentle.
Mai pulled away for breath after a moment and tentatively wrapped her legs around his waist. Their bodies pressed tightly together. There had been a dull, aching pain while he was working into her, but it was rapidly fading, replaced by the full weight of his body inside hers.
"Zuko," she murmured, "I'm fine now. It's ok."
He exhaled sharply, as though suddenly shaking free of some terrible torment. The sunlight caught in the sheen of sweat that covered his body looked like an aura of fire.
Zuko pressed his face into her hair, inhaling deeply and burning her scent into his memory. Somewhere in the shadowy, forgotten corners of his mind, he wondered if the memory was all he would have, one day.
But in the present, his hands slid down her thighs, pulling them up until he found the angle that made her cry out and writhe beneath him. Her nails dug into the skin of his back; the pain flashed across his awareness and was gone. He pulled back, pausing for a moment when she tightened around him at the motion, then slammed back into her as deeply as before. Restraint dissolved like paper vanishing in an inferno. His name was her breathless scream against his shoulder.
"I love you." It was a soft whisper, almost lost between them, but he knew she heard. She had no air to respond, but he intended to keep it that way.
Zuko sought refuge in the moment, escaped into it. He thought of nothing but the feel of Mai's skin against his, the heat of their bodies and the sound of her voice, as he lost himself in her.
End