Author: Hilde S. Nilsen (Camelot_001@hotmail.com)
Show: Water Rats
Date completed: November 1, 1999
Summary: The fact that Frank never could make good coffee, doesn't mean he's not missed...
Disclaimer: They aren't mine, never were, never will be. Hal McElroy, Southern Star and the Nine Network want them all to themselves. Not fair, is it?
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Coffee
by Hilde S. Nilsen
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Oh, do you remember the moment
When the sky turned a sad shade of grey
As darkness crept over the ocean
Then you turned to walk away
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I miss you, Frank. I really do. Nothing has ever been the same since you left. It's so strange to see someone else behind your desk, even if it's someone I know. Even if it's Jack. Maybe that only makes it worse. Because I know he's not you. And I can't pretend that he is. I glance over at your desk out of old habit, expecting to see you, busy with some sort of paper work, or just staring off into the distance. But you're not there. Sometimes that scares me. I'm afraid that one day I will wake up, and you won't be the first I think of. Afraid that it won't be you I see when I go to bed at night and close my eyes. I'm afraid, 'cause I don't want that to happen.
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I looked to the place at the table
Your face no longer seen
The reflection I saw in your coffee
Was a bitter reflection of me
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I'm sitting here in the office, pretending to be working. But my thoughts keep distracting me. My thoughts of you. You know, if some crim gets away because I can't concentrate, it's your fault. I've been trying to do the same things I've always done, but it's not that easy. Everything reminds me of you. This office, the interview room, the pictures on the walls, the stairs, even the coffee I'm drinking. It doesn't taste any good anyway. This is really annoying, you know that? I'm tired of blinking back tears every day, so that no one will start asking nosy questions. I never let anyone see me cry. But that bloody Christey has made a habit of waltzing in here every time he's not wanted. I'm telling you, he's gonna catch me one of these days. And it's all your fault. Damn you, Frank.
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Clouds in my coffee
And tears in my heart
That's what I'm feeling, yeah
You've torn me apart
Clouds in my coffee
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It's so empty here without you. At least inside this office. In other parts of the station there's Helen and Jeff and all the others to talk to, be with. But in here… I feel so alone. Even when Jack and Mick are here. I actually couldn't be more alone if I was the last living person on earth. They talk, but they don't really *talk*. Not like we did. Yeah, sure, Jack is trying very hard, but he just ends up being pathetic. God, I could kill him sometimes! Come to think of it, I seem to remember I wanted to kill you too a couple of times… Oh, well, that's in the past now. What do they say, "the show must go on"? Yeah, I guess so. But it's no fun without you. No fun at all.
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This room is so cold and so empty
Just spaces where photographs were
The echo and silence assured me
That you really were no longer here
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I think that was basically all I wanted to tell you for now. Oh, wait, one more thing: Holloway, get your butt back here, *now*! Do you hear me? No, of course you don't. How can you? I'm here, and you're somewhere out on the big, wide ocean. It was a nice idea though, don't you think? By the way, you never could make good coffee. I miss you, Frank. Please come home.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Clouds in my coffee
And tears in my heart
That's what I'm feeling, yeah
You've torn me apart
Clouds in my coffee…
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