Title: One Week
Genre: call it a romantic comedy with just enough of angst
Summary: And when all was said and done, they couldn't even remember how the fight started. AU.
Pairings: Tony/Loki, Clint/Natasha (if you squint), implied past Tony/Steve and Tony/Pepper
A/N: I never had any intention of writing an Avengers!fic, AU or not, and even though I love Tony/Loki, the thought of writing their characters terrified me so really this fic was never supposed to happen. But then I was listening to the song 'One Week' by the Barenaked Ladies and suddenly there was inspiration! Inspiration everywhere!
So please enjoy!
(This is also cross-posted on AO3)
Disclaimer: I don't own the Avengers.
One Week
Day 1
Everything starts on Wednesday.
.
.
.
They speak at the same time.
"Move in with me."
"How do you feel about cohabitation?"
Tony grins because ain't that cute? Soon they'll be finishing each others sentences.
Loki raises an eyebrow. "What did you say?"
"What did I say? What did you say? Cohabitation? That sounds like something you hear on the Discovery Channel. What are we, bears? Rawr."
"You said 'move in with me'. As in move into your apartment?"
"No, actually I want you to move into my car. Of course I mean my apartment."
"No."
"What? Hold up. What happened to cohabitation?"
"Let me make something perfectly clear. I will live with you but I will not live with you here."
"Here as in my apartment?"
"No, your car."
"Don't get fresh with me. What's wrong with my apartment?"
"Honestly, sometimes I can't tell if this is your apartment or your workshop. Either take a lesson in personal organization or buy yourself larger accommodations. We both know you can afford it."
"I don't want a bigger place. I like this place. This place has nice carpeting and er, plumbing. And nice neighbors too. Very quiet people."
"Walking from the door to the couch is akin to walking through a field of landmines. Also, your wallpaper is dreadful."
"Ouch, that hurt. But really, if not here, where would we stay? Definitely not your place."
"I was, in fact, just about to suggest that. What is wrong with my place? It is neat and not cluttered with boxes of gadgets and gizmos."
"You did not just say gadgets and gizmos. Oh gosh, where do I even start? Okay, how about with the most obvious thing. You own a large number of extremely dangerous animals, 99% of which are illegal to even have, and those that don't want to actually eat me, just want to kill me."
"My pets are very well trained. They will not harm you."
"Yes, I remember you saying that the first time I was over there. I also remember going to the hospital less than an hour later with my left hand swelling and turning blue."
"I thought we agreed that was no ones fault but your own. Why must you provoke everything you encounter?"
"There was no provoking involved. Your pets, your darling 'children' as you so creepily call them, are evil."
"They are not evil."
"Yes, they are and there is no way in hell I'm living in that zoo you call an apartment."
"Well, it seems that we're at an impasse because I refuse to live here. Perhaps this is all a mistake. Perhaps cohabitation is not right for us."
"Perhaps you're right. We both know it's not right for you."
"Care to expand on that comment?"
"It's almost cute when you play dumb. You've had more roommates than I've had one night stands."
"What are you implying?"
"I'm implying nothing. I'm saying that you're not exactly the most fun person to live with."
"And you are?"
"Yes, actually I am. I'm funny and handsome and I make a mean martini. What else could anyone want?"
"You also talk too much, are almost unbearably nosy and your sloth-like mannerisms are an extreme annoyance."
"Oh, I'm a sloth now? What happened to being bears?"
"You also seem unable to carry on a serious conversation."
"Well...you talk weird."
"As intellectually stimulating as this conversation is, I think I'm going to leave now."
"Aww, did I hurt your feelings? Well, run along then. I'm sure you have to stop off at the morgue to steal body parts to feed to your little monsters. "
"You may insult my pets and laugh about my multitude of housemates, Tony, but at least I can confidently say that no one has ever left me because I broke their heart."
"Oh...wow. Fuck you. I'm just sitting here teasing, you know making fucking jokes, and you go for the blow below the belt. Fine, you wanna play dirty? Let's play dirty. At least I can confidently say that I'm not living in this city because I ran away from home after my rich daddy, who's king of fuck knows where, got fed up with my shit attitude and made my brother his heir instead of me."
"Poor Miss. Potts. Poor Rogers. Truly, it is a terrible thing to fall in love with Tony Stark."
"Poor Thor. The poor guy actually left home, he left everything behind, for his fucked up little brother who he loves so much but who seems to like nothing more than stomping on his heart every chance he gets."
"Do you even have a heart, Stark? Sometimes I wonder."
"Oh, so it's Stark now? Well, I definitely know you have one. It's ice cold."
"I believe my business here is concluded."
"At least we can agree on one thing. Careful on your way to the door. Wouldn't want to break that pretty neck by tripping over all my gadgets and gizmos. And I hope the wallpaper makes you go blind."
The whole apartment shakes as the front door slams shut. Tony hardly notices. Angrily, he wonders if there has ever a more self-destructive relationship than his with Loki. Tony's a genius playboy who people say talks too much and Loki's more or less a pathological liar. One could say that they crept up on each other. Hate became grudging respect, which eventually became admiration, which led to appreciation, which led to them being able to be in each others company for more than fives minutes without wanting to throw the other person out a window. And then one day Tony noticed that wow, Loki has beautiful eyes and yeah he's an asshole but he's also really smart and Tony feels like he can talk to him, really talk to him, like he can't talk to anyone else and it was as if the the whole world suddenly tipped and Tony didn't get the 'grab onto something' memo and he fell. Hard. And it was almost endearing how terrified Loki was. He didn't know how to fall so Tony took his hand and they fell together.
And sometimes they fell apart.
Day 2
Anger gives way (partially) to sadness on Thursday.
They lock themselves in their respective apartments and speak to no one.
Tony drinks to forget but he passes out with the memories of the previous day still fresh in his mind.
Loki hurts and wants to break, oh he wants to break and then see the pieces run through his fingers.
Day 3
Pepper sees Tony on Friday. He's late for work and hasn't called in sick. Pepper would be worried if this didn't happen at least once a week. She lets herself into his apartment with the key he always promises he'll take away from her. She by steps the boxes on the floor, an obstacle course she long ago mastered. She finds Tony in bed, locked in a lovers embrace with an empty bottle of scotch.
She sits down on the bed. "Tony. Tony, it's time to get up. You have a board meeting in an hour and no they won't let you reschedule again."
Tony doesn't move. Pepper isn't fooled.
"They like you, Tony. They really do. They like your ideas and the quote unquote fresh perspective you bring to the table. And you know what would make them love you? If you attended the meetings more than once every six months."
Pepper gives her boss, who's still pretending to sleep, a small smile. "Come on Tony, get up. I know you're awake."
"No, you don't."
Those brown eyes are open and they stare back at her with a sleepy sadness that makes her heart hurt. Oh, what has he done now?
"Gimme the key," Tony says.
"Good morning to you too. I have no idea what you're talking about. You need to get out of bed. You have work. A promotion doesn't mean you get to skip Fridays."
"The only good thing about that promotion was that I got to keep you. Wait, did I just call that a good thing? It's too early."
Tony yawns loudly to accentuate the point.
Pepper studies his face. His eyes are bloodshot and there are dark circles underneath them. He looks tired in a way she has never seen before.
"Did you even sleep last night?" she asks.
"You know I don't sleep. Sleep is for the weak."
"You look terrible."
"Why, thank you, I think I'm extremely handsome as well."
"Tony, what's wrong?"
"Well, where do you want to start? My scotch bottle is empty, I have a crick in my back, oh, and they haven't cancelled Glee yet."
"Where's Loki?"
She knows she's gone and done it now. She loosed the arrow and hit the bulls-eye.
Tony quickly regains his composure and asks innocently, "Who?"
"Tony, don't play games. He's always here when I come to get you. Always. Oh no, don't tell me you had another one of your couples spats."
Tony makes a face. "You know I hate it when you use that word. We're men; we don't have spats."
"What happened?"
"You know what I'm in the mood for? Waffles. I can't remember the last time I had waffles. Let's go get waffles Pepper."
"Tell me."
"No."
"Why?"
"Because…because I don't want to. It has nothing to do with you."
And that hurts. More than it should. It must show because Tony's face goes soft and he mumbles something that might just be an apology but Pepper's still upset because she knows something terrible has happened.
Thor visits his brother that same morning. The visit last for five minutes and ends with him being kicked out the front door.
Day 4
Steve organizes an intervention on Saturday. Well, at first it's just coffee. They always meet for coffee at 11 a.m. on Saturday. They always meet at Shield's Coffee House. The owner is Nick Fury. He has an eye patch and he hates Tony. And that's where all personal descriptions end.
Steve's always first because that's just how Steve is. He places everyone's orders, which is unnecessary really because Phil Coulson has been working there for years and knows all their favorites by heart. Still, he listens patiently while Steve orders because he likes Steve; he thinks he's a really great guy and he likes the sound of his voice. Things only Fury and his fellow co-worker Maria Hill know. Both are sworn to secrecy.
For himself, Steve always orders a basic black Americano, no sugar. Really, Steve will drink just about any kind of coffee though. An espresso for Tony with two shots of espresso because Tony has this problem where he doesn't sleep. Green tea for Bruce, who's not too fond of coffee, but loves tea. A chai latte for Natasha. Once, she texted Steve the night before and told him to order something different for her because she didn't feel that she was getting her money's worth. The results were terrible, the fire department was called and no one ever dared change their drink choice again. Clint has a sweet tooth. It's a choco-hazelnut-caramel-latte for him, extra sugar and don't you dare forget the whipped cream. Thor's not allowed coffee because of his tendency to throw the cup on the ground once he's done. So, usually, it's just water for him or hot chocolate if everyone's in the right mood. Steve never orders for Loki. He knows better than that.
After ordering the drinks Steve sits down at the group's normal table and waits for everyone else to show up. Bruce is usually next. Bruce likes Shield's. It's quieter than Starbucks and they have nice tea. After him it's Clint and Natasha. Never just Clint or just Natasha. It's always Clint and Natasha. They're a package deal. They come in together, they leave together. No one really understands the nature of their relationship. Probably, not even them. Thor's next. In the past, sometimes it was just him; sometimes he was with his brother. Now that Tony and Loki are together in every sense of the word it's usually just him. Except the one time he brought Jane, which turned out to be a disaster. It had nothing to do with Jane, actually. It was just a really bad day. Tony always arrives last because that's just how Tony is. Officially, as of eight months ago, it's been Tony and Loki. They're the new Clint and Natasha, except their relationship is properly defined by 21st century standards and people don't stare at them before warily asking, "so, uh, are you two together or something?" in which the reply is always blank, unnerving you-did-not-just-ask-that stares.
So it's strange to everyone—everyone being Steve, Bruce, Clint and Natasha—when Thor walks in that morning with, not his brother or Jane, but with Pepper, who does drop by from time to time but is really too busy to properly participate in Saturday Morning Coffee™. Both look more than a little sad. Thor's wearing his "someone gave me a puppy, let me keep it for six months, and then broke into my house and shot it" face. Pepper looks anxious and worried.
"My friends," Thor says as he sits down, "I would greet you all with the customary 'Good Morning' except this morning is not a good one. Something strange and troubling has happened."
"Strange you say?" Clint grins. "Something strange in the neighborhood?"
Natasha fixes him with a glare. "Not the time or the place."
"Are you okay Pepper?" Steve asks. He is ever the chivalrous hero.
"Tony and Loki aren't here." Bruce is ever the observant one.
"It is them we wish to discuss," Thor says.
Steve looks as if he's expecting the worst. "Are they okay?"
"They got into a fight," Pepper says sadly.
Clint rolls his eyes. "What else is new? Those two are always having some couples spat. They'll get over it."
"No, my friend, I fear it is worse this time. I spoke to my brother yesterday and I have never seen him so upset."
"To be honest Thor, your brother's never a ray of sunshine when you're around. No offense." Bruce can be very blunt as well.
"Thor's right," Pepper says. "I saw Tony yesterday and he looked terrible. He wouldn't tell me anything except," she bites her lip, "actually, I won't repeat what he said. What's important is that I'm worried." She glances at Thor, whose shoulders, if possible, have slumped even more. "We both are. Tony and Loki have said and done terrible things to each other in the past but this time it's different. I think they really hurt each other."
"What can we do to help?" Steve asks.
Clint shoots him a look. "We?"
"Maybe if we all went to talk to them…" Pepper says.
"What is this 'we'?" Clint shakes his head. "Sorry, but I'm not getting mixed up in anything involving those two and their crazy relationship. I like living, thank you very much."
Thor reaches over the table to grasp Clint's hand and Clint more or less freaks because he has damn good reflexes but Thor moves so fast that it's terrifying and now he's holding his hand and oh gosh what if he starts stroking it?
"Please, my friend," Thor pleads. "I greatly require your assistance. I will admit that, initially, I did not approve of Tony Stark's courtship of my brother but I have come to see how beneficial the relationship is…was. It made my brother happy as I have never seen him happy before and I would like to see that again. So, I beg of you, please, help."
Clint's gone slightly pale because really this is all getting too weird and it's not even noon yet but he finally nods, partially because he's friends with Tony (he tolerates Loki) and you're supposed to help your friends (right?) and partially because Thor needs to let go of his hand, now.
Thor's face brightens slightly. "This is joyous news. Will the rest of you assist us as well?"
Natasha shrugs, which means yes. Bruce sighs and thinks he should have slept in that day but nods nonetheless.
"Yes, we'll definitely help," Steve says. "I have the perfect plan."
They split into two groups. Pepper, Steve and Bruce will handle Tony. Clint, Natasha and Thor will handle Loki. Clint complains and wants to switch groups. No one pays him any attention.
Clint, Natasha and Thor arrive at Loki's apartment to find that the door's locked and Thor's key doesn't work.
"I fear my brother has changed the locks, again. What shall we do now?" Thor asks, his voice full of what could only be described as woe.
"You act as if you haven't known me for three years," Natasha says.
It takes five seconds and a hairpin. The door clicks open and they all step inside. They find Loki on the couch, surrounded by his many pets.
Loki's eyes widen when he sees his brother. "How did you—?" Then he sees Natasha and he frowns. "I understand now. So, you've recruited your friends in hopes that they will succeed where you did not. Sorry to disappoint you, Thor, but you are sorely mistaken. Now, get out."
"You heard the man. Let's go," Clint says and turns to leave.
"Not yet," Natasha says and Clint sighs and leans back against the wall. "Look Loki, we're here because we want to be here, not because we have to be. We want to help you."
Thor steps forward. "Please brother, just listen—"
At that moment, one of Loki's pets that was curled up on his lap rears up and just hisses. Thor takes a step back, Natasha actually flinches and Clint swears and backs up further against the wall. None of them know what type of animal it even is but it's got an impressive collection of teeth and it looks vicious enough to use them. Loki just smiles like a proud parent and strokes its head before he turns back to Thor.
"I told you yesterday that I do not want or need any help," he says angrily.
"Can you at least tell us what happened?" Natasha asks.
"No."
"This is so stupid," Clint says from against the wall, "Loki, you and Tony fight all the time. Just do what you always do. Say sorry and get it on."
Loki shoots him a look that says I know where you live and I will sneak into your house tonight and kill you slowly and no one will ever find your body and you think I'm joking don't you, hah, we'll see who's laughing later and to solidify the threat, the thing on his lap hisses again and christ, its tongue is black and forked and what is it even?
"You should all do yourselves a favor and keep out of mine and Stark's business," Loki says.
Natasha raises an eyebrow. "Since when do you call him Stark? This really is serious then."
Thor tries again. "Brother, I am here because I want to see you as happy as you once were. Let us help you, please."
Thor takes a step forward and it is a huge mistake because there's a yowl from the floor and suddenly his arms are full of something furry and angry as fuck because it's hissing and clawing madly at whatever it can reach.
"Holy shit!" Clint says and then there's a crash. He's gone and knocked something over and it takes three seconds for him to start shrieking.
"There's something crawling up my leg! Fuck! There's something crawling up my leg!"
And then Loki's on his feet and clearly the brothers were named wrong because his expression is thunder.
"Get. Out!"
They don't need to be told twice. Natasha grabs Clint and Thor and they are gone.
In the end, Thor needs stitches and Clint has dark welts on his legs that the doctor just stares at for the longest time before proceeding to slowly ask him if he's been to Peru lately.
Clint swears revenge. Thor looks more heartbroken than ever.
They're still in the emergency room when Pepper calls with unfortunate news. Her groups luck hadn't been any better. Tony was already half drunk when they arrived at his apartment and everything just went downhill from there. She's still not quite sure what exactly happened because she had to step out to take a call but from what Steve's told her, Tony said some things, Bruce got angry and now Tony's flat screen has a hole in it the size of Bruce's foot.
It's only a little past 1 p.m. but they all decide to call it a day.
Day 5
Everything goes wrong on Sunday.
Tony wakes up on the wrong side of the bed. Literally.
He sleeps on the right side and, when he's over, Loki sleeps on the left side. That morning Tony wakes up on the left side with a splitting headache and little memory of how he even ended up in bed. He had a terrible nightmare involving Bruce and his television.
He goes into the living room and discovers that it wasn't a nightmare after all.
It must be a national holiday because everywhere Tony calls is closed and he swears he will kill Bruce the next time he sees him, or maybe they'll just have strong words because he fought with Bruce once and ended up in the hospital with broken ribs and a concussion. That man is extremely dangerous when angry.
So, he doesn't have a TV anymore. That's fine. There's never anything good on and he's not exactly keeping up with the Kardashians. Tony goes into the kitchen to make coffee because he has one hell of a hangover and coffee makes everything better.
He's out of coffee.
Tony will not scream. He will not scream. He will change his clothes and go to Shield's where he will order his usual, sit down, read the paper and be fine, because that's what he is. He is fine. He's not thinking about Loki, about this whole big mess that started because fuck if he even knows anymore. But that is all irrelevant because he is fine.
So he gets dressed and is halfway to Shield's when he remembers it's Sunday and Shield's might be open on a national holiday but it's never open on Sundays.
He will not scream.
When Tony walks back into his apartment he trips over a box in front of the door and goes flying. He smacks face first into the wall and then there's pain and then blood and it's 11:49 a.m. but Tony Stark has reached his limit.
But he doesn't scream. He cleans.
It takes the rest of the day, but when he's done, everything that belongs in his workshop is in his workshop. His apartment is spotless in a way he has never seen it. Pepper would be proud. And Loki…
Tony will not cry.
He falls into bed but doesn't sleep but that's okay because he's fine.
Loki doesn't wake up on the wrong side of the bed that morning. He wakes up to find that the Australian tiger snake he bought the previous week has somehow escaped from its cage over the course of the night and is curled up at the foot of his bed. He doesn't scream, in fact, he stops breathing all together. A random assortment of facts flood his mind. The tiger snake is generally found in coastal regions, it's quiet, and it is one of the most poisonous snakes in the world.
He's dead.
His left foot is only a few inches away from the snake's head and he doesn't doubt that if he makes the slightest movement it will strike.
He's too young to die. He still has too many plans. There's still a whole world for him to take over.
The irony of the situation is not lost on him. Everyone, from his brother to Tony, warned him about his pets. They told him that people who kept dangerous animals always ended up being killed by them. He had paid little attention to these warnings. Was it too late for regret?
Would they mourn him? Thor would, probably. What a noisy funeral his would be with all that weeping. And what an empty one too. Besides Thor, who else would bother to show up? He didn't delude himself into thinking that Thor's friends felt anything for him except tolerance. There had even been a time when they all hated him, Tony as well.
Tony…would he attend Loki's funeral? Or would he just roll his eyes and say in that irritating, wonderful voice of his that Loki got exactly what he deserved.
Tony was the last person Loki wanted to think about at the moment. Tony, who had somehow gotten under his skin and crept into his heart. Tony, who can't help but smile, even when he's feeling sad. Tony, who never fails to tell Loki how funny he looks when he's angry. Tony, who would show up halfway through his funeral and laugh, not out of spite, but because that's just how Tony is.
Loki's supposed to be furious at Tony but at that moment can't remember why. They fought, but over what Loki can hardly recall. Real estate was involved, he thinks.
Loki decides that, if he lives, he'll call Tony.
The morning passes slowly and Loki morbidly fantasizes about what color suit they'll put his body in.
The bedside clock reads 11:49 a.m. when Loki feels movement by his foot. He has to bite his lip so as not to scream as he watches the snake uncurl itself. For a horrible second it almost looks as if it will climb up towards him but it then it slithers down the bed onto the floor. Loki watches with wide eyes as it slips silently back under his bedroom door. It takes a few minutes for his breathing to return back to normal but as soon as he's reached some semblance of calm he grabs his phone, which has been lying useless on the floor throughout the whole ordeal, and dials the number of the man who sells him his pets. Loki spends the next half hour sitting on the bathroom sink. Thankfully, he keeps his apartment door unlocked—he lives in a good neighborhood and really, only a complete fool would break into his apartment—so when there's a knock on the door he only calls out "It's open!". He doesn't know exactly what the man does, but ten minutes later he walks into Loki's room and the snake is lying in a small cage in his hands.
"Dude, are you sure you don't want it anymore? This little guy here is a collectors item. You don't know what you're throwing away."
Loki frowns at the 'dude'.
"I know very well what I am doing," he says. "While you are here, please take back the lizard from China, as well as the two Madagascan birds."
"But the birds aren't poisonous."
"No, but they're extremely annoying."
He ends up not calling Tony. Not because he doesn't want to but because he doesn't quite know what to say. "I had a near death experience this morning that caused me to reevaluate our relationship and realize how very much I need you in my life," just didn't seem right.
Loki spends the rest of the day thinking of what exactly to say to Tony while triple enforcing the cage of his black mamba. It had been a gift.
Day 6
They forgive each other on Monday.
Tony waits by his phone until noon when he decides that, just for this one time, he'll forget his pride and be the first to apologize.
He dials Loki's number and hangs up after the first ring.
A few deep breaths later, along with a mental pep talk—who's the best? You're the best! Who's going to make that call? You are! Because you're the best!—he tries again.
He makes it to the second ring before he ends the call. Tony Stark is a man of many talents. Clearly, begging for forgiveness is a useless talent unless he would have had it.
He almost jumps when the phone suddenly rings and his hands start shaking a little when he sees the name flashing across the screen.
"Uh, h-hello?" he answers, cool as a cucumber. Obviously.
"You called?" Loki sounds like…Loki. Perpetually annoyed and sulky except maybe, just maybe, Tony thinks there's something else there. Something vaguely akin to happy? It's so faint he almost misses it but he hears it and hangs onto it.
"I have no idea what you're talking about but it's actually perfect that you called. You see, there comes a point in every little boy's life—"
"Get to the point, Stark."
Tony frowns. "Still with Stark? I see. Okay, you want the point? The point is,"—I miss you, I need you, you complete me, baby come back you can blame it all on me—"we need to talk. We need to sit down and talk like mature adults—was that a scoff? Don't scoff when I'm speaking—about us. This relationship and where it's going." Tony's holding the phone so tight he's afraid it will snap in half. "I'm tired of being angry."
Loki's quiet for a few seconds before he says, "Shield's. 3 o'clock."
Then he hangs up the phone and Tony's left with a dial tone and little bit of hope.
He arrives at Shield's 10 minutes early and Fury shoots him an ice cold glare as if that is such a crime and Tony bets he knows every detail about what has happened over the past six days and that he goes to bed every night smiling because Tony's misery is his joy and oh, he is one cold son of a bitch.
Coulson's not working today so Fury brings Tony his usual. Tony just glares at it because it's poisoned and he knows it.
"Are you going to drink it or make out with it, Stark?" Fury snaps.
Tony meets his glare. I know what you are, he relays over the nonexistent telepathic channel between them.
Fury rolls his eyes and walks away.
"Weird ass motherfucka."
Tony makes a face behind his back. Loki chooses that moment to walk in and it's been so long since they've seen each other because really, five days? More like five months. So Tony just stares and his pre-planned, organized, grammatically correct speech flies completely out of his head.
In the end they have a serious discussion.
Tony babbles incoherently for five minutes until Loki tells him to shut up.
Loki asks if he's going to drink his coffee. Tony says no.
"Fury poisoned it. I know he did."
Loki drinks it anyway.
"So, are we alright?" Tony asks finally. He's calmed down slightly after his initial outburst.
Loki looks thoughtful. Or maybe the poison has started taking its effect.
"Yes, I think so."
(It will still be at least three days before either one says sorry.)
There are some tears.
Tony will deny everything later. Fury keeps the pictures.
Day 7
Steve enters Tony's apartment on Tuesday with a shaky optimism that is probably just jet lag and the cup of coffee he drank in the taxi. He'd had to fly to California on Sunday for a job interview Monday afternoon and had booked the first flight back that he could. The plan he put together on the airplane is full of more holes than a colander but he's tired and it's all he's got. He unlocks the front door with the key Tony keeps threatening to take away, not knowing what to expect and encountering the unexpected.
The first shock is Tony's apartment. It's spotless in a way Steve has never seen before. Countless blueprints for whatever new project Tony is working on don't cover the kitchen table. There aren't boxes of scrap metal—"No, it's not scrap," Tony would always scoff—scattered across the floor. The sink is empty. Steve half wonders if he's in the right apartment when he hears the unmistakable laughter of Tony Stark. Steve closes the front door and walks slowly down the now obstruction free hallway.
He finds them in the living room stretched out on the couch with their backs to him. Tony's still snickering, no doubt at his own joke. He has a real estate flyer in one hand, a highlighter in the other. Loki's nose is buried in a large, leather bound tome and he's pretending that he doesn't hear anything Tony is saying.
They are as they once were. They're back to normal. Or as close to normal as they can possibly get.
Steve doesn't know what to say.
"It's rude to lurk, Rogers. It's also quite unsettling," Loki says without turning around.
Really though, he's the last person on earth who should be describing someone's behaviorisms as unsettling.
Tony's head whips around and yes, he's surprised but he also looks so damn happy. When was the last time Steve saw him look like that? Oh yes, a week ago, before the whole terrible ordeal started. That it's Loki that makes him so happy is something Steve has long accepted, although at times it's still more than a little strange.
What do you get when you cross a liar with a genius playboy who talks too much?
"Steve? Steve, you're back! I missed you. No, not really. When did you get back? You should have called."
"My phone died on the plane. I just got back actually."
Tony gives him a once over. "I see that now. You rushed all the way over here just to see me? Steve, I'm touched."
Steve can't help but blush a little because he's feeling foolish now and things are going nothing like he thought they would. "I…I just wanted to make sure everything was okay. Is everything okay?"
"Is there any reason that it shouldn't be?" Loki asks.
His expression is unreadable so Steve can't tell if he's teasing him or not. He probably is.
"Oh, well, um, I guess not. It's just…you know what? Forget it. It's not important anymore. I'm going to go now."
"I'll call you later and you can tell me about your interview," Tony says. "Make sure you charge your phone. Remember, you actually have to plug the charger into the wall for it to work."
Steve turns and heads back down the hallway. "Bye Tony."
"We'll get lunch tomorrow," Tony calls after him. "I'll even let you pick the place. Just nowhere boring or old fashioned, okay? Actually, scratch that. I'll pick the place."
Steve just smiles. He should have known better. He, Pepper, Thor...they should have all known better.
"I'll talk to you later Tony. Bye Loki," he says before stepping into the hallway.
What do you get when you cross a liar with a genius playboy who talks too much?
There's no punch line. There's no joke. There's two people who might just end up making better men out of each other.
A/N: The drink orders are actually from this coffee headcanon post on tumblr. Unfortunately, I lost the link to the original post. If I find it, I'll link it