A/N: Hey there, this is my second Naruto fanfic. Please tell me what you think and I will update again. Enjoy, read, and review!

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, Masashi Kishimoto does.

Every man has his secret sorrows which the world knows not;

and often times we call a man cold when he is only sad.

- Henry Wadsworth

"Sakura."

I look up and see her standing in the door of my room. I feel goosebumps in my arms but I check it off.

"What the hell are you still doing here? Why don't you leave my house already? Or better yet, why don't you die already?" she says and laughs like she said the most hilarious joke. I stay silent, as always. I learned the bad way that it all ended faster if I did.

"Maybe if I had aborted you in the beginning, Kizashi wouldn't have left me. Tch, leave my home already!" she screams and throws me an empty bottle of wine she had in her hand from last night's drinking night. Every night is one.

Seems like she has a headache from her hangover.

I toake my things and go downstairs. The house was big considering only the two of us live here.

"Thomas, take care of the house and be careful with that woman okay?" I whisper to my fish.

Yeah, I know a fish can't do anything but I still tell him. He is the only one twho knows the hell I live with Mebuki. I used to have a little dog, back when I was little. My parents had recently divorced and I was in my room playing with Lucas, four-months old puppy, when she entered the room and decided she didn't like dogs anymore. She took him and threw him out. I spent hours that afternoon looking for him and when I finally found him, he was dead. Hit by a car.

I leave the house and start walking. Days like this is when I prefer walking because using the car she bought me just makes me remember her.

I sit on the walkside after looking at my phome to check the time.

You know how people say music is a way out if the workd that surrounds you? That music understand you and practically talks about your life. Poetry with rhythm. A mix of words and sound that make your eardrums dance in delight.

As you may also know, music is not the only escape from reality. There's food, sleep, paint, write, sports, etc. these being the common ones. I've found a very useful method, not common but handy and addicting.

I take a razor out of one of my pockets and cut. I feel the pain and see the blood flow. It dries out and I cut again, and again, and again.

I have cut over a year now and no one has ever notice, which I'm grateful for and disappointed at the same time. Cutting is something that let's almost all the stress out of your body.

My first time when my old mom dared to raise a hand at me and hit me. Hard. A lot of times. I cried and cried and felt like it wasn't enough. I went to the bathroom to take a bath so she wouldn't notice that I cried so much.

I found a little knife-like things, like the ones barbers use to chop beards and stuff like that. It was my dad's and it had always been there; although this time it was calling me.

I had seen and heard about cutting before but never had I done it. My hands trembled at the idea and goosebumps made their way to my spinal cord. I was cold and had dry tears uin my face, in other words, a mess. I took it and cut.

It felt so good I didn't even felt pain at all and from that time I kept doing it. Just when I felt stressed up or something although lately I have felt like I'm getting addicted since I do it everyday now. Or is it because I fight with her everyday. I don't even know now.

I got to the doors of our school and saw Ino, Naruto and Hinata.

"Hey guys," I say.

"Hey!" they all said. Naruto and Hinata had been dating from the last week last year; they look good together. So have been Temari and Shikamaru, Tenten and Neji, and Karin and Sasuke.

"Sakura, you heard?" Ino whispered in my ear so she couldn't disturb the two lovebirds by her side as we walked.

"No." I'm not really interested but Ino always tells me about things I don't even care.

"Sasuke and Karin broke up! Isn't that great? This is finally your chance," she says and for the first time got my attention although I knew why they did. Sasuke must have find out yesterday. Guess there is no more Karin and Sasuke.

"As expected, Karin has cheated on him with Suigetsu for a long time now."

"I was about to say that! How do you know?!"

"They go to the place I work at all the time although. I don't think they have noticed me. They are always making out, ugh," I say disgusted.

"What a nice place to do it..." I laug. It was true, a pizza restaurant is not the best place to do it. "But why didn't you say anything to Sasuke?"

"That's his problem not mine. Besides, you think he would have believed me?"

"Guess not," she says and the first bell ranged. There are two bells in our school: one to go to our lockers, we get about ten minutes and then the second bell to get to class. "See you at lunch Sakura!"

"We have biology together just before lunch." I say with a poker face. Her memory is really bad and the only class she is good at is bio, why doesn't she remember me being there with her?

"Oh yeah, with Sai too!" she said and ran. I had forgotten she has a crush on Sai now.

I get to my locker, which was above Lee's and in between Kiba and Sasuke.

"Hey Kiba, Lee," I say when I see both boys talking just in front of my locker. Some people just don't realize they get in the way sometimes.

"Hello my cherry blossom, how are you today?" Lee asks while Kiba just smiles at me and nodded like acknowledging my greeting before answering a call from his phone.

"How are you today, Lee?" I asked. I always try to avoid answering questions like 'how are you' because if I do, I don't think I can lie that much about my feelings. I'm a good actor but still not a professional.

"Oh, I'm feeling really good! And know what?"

"What?" I ask. I see Sasuke and Karin's subject coming again. Why can't people see I'm not interested in him anymore?

"I got a girlfriend."

"WHAT!? How? When? From where? What's her name?" I start attacking poor Lee with questions but he just laughed and tried to answer all my questions.

"Okay, okay. Well... it was last week during vacations; she is my new neighbor. I liked her and she liked me and we just got together! Her name is Ami and I want you to meet her."

"Wow that's great Lee! I'll see what I can do to get some free time and meet her." I said and the second bell rang. How much time have I been talking?

"Yes! Gotta go Sakura-san, bye!" he said. That bastard, he had his books with him all the time and I'm now the only one in the hall. Gotta hurry, if Kurenai sees I got late to history class I will get in big trouble.

I got my books for the first four hours and I turned around to head to my class when I bumped into someone. Wasn't I alone a moment ago?

"Sorry," I said before looking at the person I bumped into. It was Sasuke, the person everyone is talking about now.

"Hn," he said and went to his locker. Not wanting to talk to him I headed to my class and tried to open the door but it was closed, a sign in the doorknob.

'Anyone getting late has no right to come in' said the sign and I sighted. Kurenai's pregnancy has made her very hormonal. Now I lost the first two classes, I had a double period today.

I then walked to the stairs to get to the roof of the school. Is great in here when you want to be alone. You can feel the breeze of the air on your skin and hear nothing but the air; also, the view is great, you can see all the city.

In the last stair I tripped like the dumb person I am. Trying to protect my face I placed my arms in front of my face in self-defense. I hit the floor hard with my wrists, elbows and palms of the hands. I said I'm clumsy right? I don't know how to fall because I know this is clearly not the way.

A stingy pain came throughout my body, one of my cuts got bigger with the fall and I was bleeding uncontrollably since al my cuts are deep. I got to the roof and sat in my usual place when in the roof and got out a piece of tissue I carry, like when something like this happens, and started drying the blood but, the blood wouldn't stop! I tried to press harder but that only made it bigger and more blood came out.

"What happened to you?"

I raised my eyes from my wound in my wrist to the person who talked, Sasuke. Yeah, I forgot he is also in Kurenai's class and he also got here late. I also forgot he likes to come here. Why or how do I know that? Well I have sometimes seen him here but we never talk, it was almost a rule and he just broke it.