Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or ecstasy. I'm a little sad about the first one.
CRACK-FIC
AN: The only beta I have is grammar check on Microsoft Word, so please bear with me
Voldemort sat in his throne of stitched together kittens. He cackled whenever he heard their little squeaks. There was a fuzzy one under his right hand that had black spots above his eyes. He didn't squeak whenever he sat down, but it did make a delightful sound whenever he distractedly rubbed it.
He looked down at the cloaked people. They seemed to be quivering beneath his gaze. His no-lips spread in an evil grin and he rubbed the kitty again.
"So why hasn't anyone brought the Potter brat to me?" he asked.
"Um… he's at Hogwarts. We can't get passed Dumble…" a blond man started.
"Crucio, I'm bored. Someone bring me Potter," he demanded.
His red eyes narrowed until the whole crowd disapperated.
(CRACK)
He was standing in front of the gates of Hogwarts looking at them in puzzlement.
"Someone open these damn things!" he hollered.
At his shout they parted for him and his followers to pass. He glided up the path until he was facing Dumbledore, who was right in from the entrance.
"I demand that you give me Harry Potter so I can kill him horribly and declare myself the ruler of the entire world," he commanded.
"If that's what you really want," Dumbledore answered, right as he stepped aside.
The boy stepped out from behind the bearded wizard. He had his hands behind his back and his eyes had the Dumbledore sparkle in them.
"I have one request before you take my life Tom. Please do me the honor or swallowing this and I will readily submit to your will." He pulled his hands out from behind his back. In one was a small pill in the other was a glass of water.
"Very well. That is a dying request I can honor," Voldemort answered.
He walked up and took the items from Harry. He swallowed the pill and threw the glass at one of his followers. He stared at the blood dripping down the man and suddenly had the weirdest urge to hug him. And he felt this beat flowing through him that he just couldn't ignore. He started dancing, waving his hands around and gyrating his hips.
"Everyone, lets put our wands away and just enjoy the beauty that has brought us all here. We must celebrate!" he shouted.
The music became louder and everyone joined in. A few people waved their wands before putting them away and flashes of lights that changed colors in beat with the music. A stage appeared and Voldemort just had to climb onto it.
"Harry, Harry up here with me, there is something I need to tell you." He insisted.
Harry complied, and stood patiently for Voldemort to speak.
"I have this sudden surge of ecstasy. Come Harry let me embrace you. Let me show you how much love I have for you now," he said.
Right as he put his arms around Harry he exploded. Nothing but bright sparkles remained of the Dark Lord.
The Order members present stopped dancing and pulled their wands back out. A few jinxes and hexes later all the Death Eaters were bound and unmasked. When the Aurors took them away the Order members turned the music up and continued dancing.
THE END