If You Love Me

TITLE: If you love me...
(A guide to how Obi and Jemmy usually sort out their differences in opinion)

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"Jemmy?"
"What?"
"I was wondering…?"
"Yes?"
"Um…if you would do me a favor?"
"Which is?"
"Er…my socks have a hole in the toe."
"I'm pleased for them."
"I was kind of hoping that you might…?
"Darn them?"
"Yes."

Pause.

"No."
"Why not?"
"Because your socks are disgusting!"
"Oh, please Jemmy."
"Why should I?"
"Well, I'm not much good at that sort of thing."
"Hopeless is the word I would use."
"Thanks."
"I'd need danger money before I handled those objects."
"They're my only pair! My master made me put all the others in the washing basket."
"So buy some others."
"Jemmy…"
"I'm Corellian! I don't DO darning men's socks."
"You're my girlfriend!"
"So?"
"If you loved me you'd do it."

Sigh.

"Oh, give them here."
"Thanks, Jemmy!"
"Well, where are they?"
"On my feet."
"Oh, Sith…"

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TWO DAYS LATER:

"Jemmy?"
"Uh-huh?"
"Er…I need another bit of a favor."
"Which is?"
"You know that rash I sometimes get?"
"The Alderaani Rum induced one?"
"That's the one…well, it's kind of come back."
"Did Simeon spike your drink?"
"Well…"
"I'll take that as a yes. What do you want me to do about it?"
"It's all over my back and I can't reach it to put the cream on. I was wondering if…"
"I'd come round to rub it on for you?"
"Would you?"
"No."
"But I'm in so much discomfort!"
"Go to the healers."
"I can't believe you said that!"
"Get Master Jinn to do it."
"He's away visiting a friend in the city all day."
"Is he indeed."
"And I'm all on my own…"
"Poor helpless baby."
"Aww…please Jemmiah!"
"I dunno."
"If you loved me you'd do it."

Groan.

"OK. I'll be right over. But you owe me big time for this."
"I'm sure we can think of something!"
"Yeah, I'm sure you can!"

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LATER THAT NIGHT:

"Jemmy?"
"What?"
"Thanks for bringing the chocolates over."
"That's OK."

Looks at the floor.

"I was wondering…"
"What?"
"Well, we've been going out for a few months now."
"And?"
"Would you mind terribly if I…"

Bends over and whispers in her ear.

"NO!"
"Why not?"
"Because."
"That's no answer."
"Tough luck."
"It would mean a lot to me."
"I'm NOT doing it."
"That's so unfair! I thought we shared everything."
"Don't push your luck."
"You are being extremely selfish. All I'm asking is that you let me…"
"I've been bending over backwards to do everything you've asked of me. It's all one way with you!"
"Please, Jemmy?"
"Stop fluttering those eyelashes, Ben. It won't work."
"But I…"
"You've got a one track mind, that's your problem!"
"If you loved me you'd do it."
"Oh, I was waiting for that one!"
"Well?"
"Stop wheedling."
"Please, Jemmy?"
"Stop it…"
"Pretty, pretty please? I'll give you a kiss first."
"Ben, I said…oh, alright. If it'll keep you happy. But this is the one and only time that I'm doing this…"
"Jemmy, you are a wonderful person."
"Go on, then."

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EVEN LATER THAT NIGHT:

"Had a good evening, padawan?"
"Oh, yes master!"
"Jemmiah visit you, did she?"
"Yes, as a matter of fact. She showed me the meaning of true love and devotion."
"How was that?"

Grins.

"She gave me the last chocolate left in the packet."