I know I shouldn't abandon some of my stories but this one was just calling to me. Stories spinning left and right, I'll keep updating though.
"You know, you're not going to get anywhere just staring at him. Though he might get a restraining order and call you a stalker." Sakura Haruno could not stop staring at him though. She was just too jealous. "Whatever, keep stalking him, see if I care."
The person talking to her just happened to be a red head that shouldn't have put her two-sense into staring at people. The girl who tried to drug her own friends to rape a guy who would so beat her ass.
At the table Sakura was staring at happened to be an odd combination. "Little brother, I don't understand why she always stares at you; her motives make no sense to me. I fear I don't understand which makes me weak." Itachi sat back down and had a sad little frown on his face for he had to know everything.
"Shut up Aniki, don't mention that pink, little retrovirus to me."
"D-don't talk about Sakura-chan like that, you fucking bastard… Idiot." A cute, blonde made a pout and his eyes slitted dangerously. The dark haired kid just looked at him while lounging in his seat.
"My, my. I'm sorry; I didn't know you had a crush on…that…hmm a good name to call her… Sakura… sorry for the inconvenience Naru, couldn't insult your 'lover'." Said blonde was not happy. His face was red from Sasuke's little comment. He chose to just let it go though.
"I fucking hate UNIFORMS! Plus these lunches taste like WEEK OLD JIZ!"
"You would know." Hidan looked down at his cousin. Tayuya just smirked at him. The girls' uniform consisted of a white button down shirt with a plaid grey and grey skirt. Same for the guys but with pants. They could add school things to them like, the icky, maroon sweaters, the 'Spirit' shirts, or a number of things that deemed appropriate. Hidan however, chose to not button his shirt at all.
The two sat at the lunch table next to Itachi's table.
The school had just been built during the summer. Only exceptionally gifted students were allowed to come here. You couldn't apply, they came for you. The rules were strict on what they could do involving those particular skills, you got a chakra repressor installed into your system. This, they thought, would limit all conflict with power and fights.
"Attention! Attention!! ATTENTION YOU INFERIOR DEGENERATES!" The principal, Tsunade Senju. The most feared woman in the world possibly, ok no but she was scary. She stood in her big-breasted glory in front of the gym with a microphone. "Welcome, I know some of you may have a couple friends here, but get ready to get more."
"I'd like to be your friend Lady Tsunade!" In the crowd stood Sai waving frantically. He was socially retarded so there was no double meaning to his words either. He was damn serious about his friends. He stopped waving and waited for her reaction with a smile on his face.
"Sure Sai, I'd love to be your friend." Her voice was extremely condescending but he did a victory dance, still not getting it.
Hidan burst into laughter. "I'd love for you to punish me Miss Senju; I am a bad boy, but no direct sex. Lord Jashin would not approve. But I could always- he made a sign with his below and pointed to her large 'assets' making vulgar movements.
She smiled at him. "Hidan, I'm not going to punish you but he will." She pointed to Orochimaru who just smiled in his usual Michael Jackson, Snake, skank manor. Hidan's eyes widened in terror.
"Alright, you are going to be set up into dorms, some coed for a couple of people. But if you are not in this exception and are found in the opposite sexes room, you are in deep shit. You already have your schedules and room numbers so good night."
Tsunade stepped into her office and looked at a couple of the dorm room schedules:
Sakura and Sasuke: No need for Sasuke to get a little too friendly with a certain blonde and Sasuke could take her if anything funny went on.
"Yes! Sasuke-kun we are together!" 'Now I can get more information about someone.'
"I think God hates me."
Sasori and Ino: Keeping puppet boy away from a certain other pony-tailed blonde.
"Uhh who is this Sasori?" Just as the words left her mouth, an old guy with bad posture walked to her.
"Are you Ino?" He said it in his low Hiruko voice.
"Ahhh! RAPIST!"
Naruto and Lee: I wanted to give the kid hell.
"Oh, with the power of youthfulness I will make this the best man on man time ever Naruto!"
"Yeah Baby!"
Matsuri and Gaara: Not like these, two know each other and hopefully Gaara will kill her, she's annoying.
"Sensei! We're together."
"Oh." 'Good thing Temari told me to come 'prepared.'
Fuka, Karin, and Tayuya: They all balance each other out. FIRE CROTCH POWER!
"I have to spend time with an extremely hideous girl and a boy."
"I'd rather be called a boy than ugly, ha-ha bitch."
"I am not hideous! You're just jealous."
"Of what, not having those grotesque hickeys on my neck?"
All those cloud kids: I don't know.
"Hey titless and tits galore all of us are sharing a room."
"Shut up… Err." Omoi spat his toothpick at his sister's face. "I hate you…"
Juugo, Choji, and Zetsu: Have weight problems and are sensitive and or psychotic.
"Wow, I wonder what great people will bring yummy food."
"H-hi, I'm Juugo."
"Hi, I'm Zetsu. Shove a stick up your ass! Sorry, I have… issues.
Hidan and Deidara: That would be some hot sado-masochism. I-I mean they both have blonde hair.
"Unn… I have to be with Hidan-san?"
"Get used to it you blonde, faggy, Son of a whore."
"Unn, you're mom was the one who got knocked up when she was twelve."
"Fuck you, fire cocker."
Konan and Sai: They love paper and maybe Konan will kill Sai.
"Konan-san it is an honor to meet you." Sai bowed. Konan walked away.
Neji and Kiba: They both won't hump Hinata now.
"Yo, wassup Neji Still got a stick up your ass. Maybe Akamaru should play fetch with it to help you with your problems." Neji just stared at Kiba. The stare he always gave Gai-sensei.
Hinata and Haku: They both start with H and have long hair.
"H-hi."
"Hello Hinata." His voice was smooth and velvety, she blushed.
Shikamaru, Kankuro, and Temari: This should be fun to watch.
"Troublesome siblings."
"Uhh! A proper greeting would be nice Shika."
"Is this my new brother-in-law, Temari?" She blushed grabbed her fan and SMACK.
Ten-ten, Kakazu, Sugetsu, and Pein: No one left.
"Give me your lunch money or die!"
"H-here."
"I like Slushies."
"Die." He looked at a wall and it burst into flames just as Gaara walked by. He bowed down at Pein.
Itachi: He requested it… fag.
Should I continue?