A/N: This is my first attempt with this pairing. Who knows? Maybe there will be more one-shots of these two to come.
Background: Bonnie and Jeremy didn't get back together after she came back from the dead, the first time. The rest should be explained in story.
I DO NOT OWN THE VAMPIRE DIARIES OR THE CHARACTERS.
Song Suggestion/Inspiration: "Human" by Christina Perri
I sat shaking on the floor. Having the dead pass through my body to get to the other side is becoming harder and harder. My body wasn't designed for the toll that being the gateway between the living and the dead is taking. It's not like I can snap my fingers and pass it onto someone else. I'm living on borrowed time, at best. It's just a lot to handle. Everyone is busy doing their own thing. I don't have anyone to lean on. No one really gets it. I'm only human.
"Bonnie, are you okay?" Matt asked me. I looked over at him and nodded and tried to fake a smile, but failed. It hurts so badly. I can't hide it, right now. I'm normally so good at hiding it.
"Give me a few minutes, Matt." I grunted out. He rushed over to me and cradled me in his arms. I could see the concern wash over him.
"How long has this been going on, Bon?" He asked, quietly.
"Since I got back," I admitted, quietly.
"Why didn't you tell anyone?" I could hear the disbelief in his voice.
"I didn't think it would make a difference. What good would it do? No one can fix this." I whispered. I felt him place a kiss on the top of my head.
"You could have told me. You shouldn't have to go through something like this alone. You don't have to carry this burden by yourself… I'm never too busy for you." He held me, until the tremors stopped and my breathing returned back to normal. My body sagged against him. Everything hurts. This always takes the life out of me.
"Matt, I'm okay. I'll be okay. You can let me go, now." I told him. He sighed and did as I asked.
"I care about you. You know that, Bonnie, right? I know I've been busy, but I'll make time for this. There's gotta be a way that we can take the toll off of your body." He suggested. I shrugged. It just seems so hopeless.
"I just don't know what would help, Matt. The witches were clear, when they stripped my powers. It's this or death." I breathed. I rubbed my forehead, wishing that Grams was still alive, so I could ask her advice right now.
"Bon, do you even hear yourself? That doesn't make any sense. Why would they let you live, if doing this is just going to kill you?" He shook his head. He's right. I know that he's right. I just don't see them going for it.
"I wish I knew, Matt." I frowned.
"Ask them." He suggested.
"I don't have any magic." I reminded him.
"Ask them, anyway. You're a Bennett. They can't just ignore you."
I took Matt's advice and called my cousin Lucy. Matt agreed to go with me to meet her. We all thought it best if we met somewhere outside of Mystic Falls. I didn't want to chance anything going wrong. Lucy and I chanted and Matt just watched quietly. I'm just hoping that this actually works.
"Why have you called me here, child?" Emily asked, as she appeared in front of us. She didn't look happy to see either one of us.
"She called you here, as a favor to me." I spoke up. Emily turned her attention on me.
"You have used up all of your favors, Bonnie." She warned me. I gulped. I know she's right. She is, but I have to try.
"Why did you let me come back, if guarding the other side is just going to kill me? My body can't handle the strain. I'm only human, Emily." I reminded her. Her face remained cold and impassive. "I'm not asking for my powers back. I don't know what I'm asking for, but I'm asking for a way that will let my body handle this. I can handle the pain, but I don't want to die. Please." I begged her.
"If you're not going to help her, what's the point in Bonnie even being here?" Matt snapped, angrily. I looked over at him and shot him an exasperated look, trying to get him to shut up. I can't protect him if he pisses off the witches. That's the last thing that we need, right now.
"You have a point, child." Emily admitted. "I will give you peace, but it will be conditional." She warned me. What does she mean by that? "You will get a small portion of your powers back, just enough to be one with nature. Nothing more. You are to stay out of the doppelgänger affairs and out of Mystic Falls. The temptation is too great there. If you keep sacrificing yourself for your friends, your only reward will be death. You have been overexerting your body for much longer than you have been the gateway to the other side, young one. That is the offer. You may take it or leave it."
"She'll take it." Matt spoke for me. I looked over at him.
"Matt!" I scolded him.
"What Bonnie? Do you expect me to just sit here and watch you die, again?! I won't do it! I can't do it! Would leaving Mystic Falls really be so bad? What do you have holding you there? I'll leave with you. We can start over somewhere new." Matt tried to persuade me.
"You can come to Texas, with me." Lucy offered. "You both can."
"I can't ask you to do that, either of you." I shook my head.
"You're not asking, Bon. We're offering. I'm going with you. It's not up for discussion. I have to know that you're okay." Matt told me.
"And you're family. It'll be nice to have family around, again." Lucy smiled.
"Is this really happening?" I wondered, aloud.
"If you so wish, child," Emily nodded.
"Come on, Bon. What do you have to lose?" Matt asked me. I wasn't sure if I would regret my decision or not. I don't know that my other friends will understand… I only pray that they will.
"Okay. Yes. I accept your terms." I promised Emily.
"Very well," she nodded and then she was gone. The effect was immediate. I felt better, I felt right. I've missed being able to feel nature.
We didn't talk much during the drive home. Even though parts of me felt rejuvenated, I still feel exhausted. Matt stayed with me and we called it a night. We'll tell everyone in the morning. I just hope this doesn't blow up in our faces.
I couldn't stop the shaking, as I fell next to my car. I went down, hard. I skinned my arms and the side of my face. I screamed, as this ghost struggled to pass. For an old man, he's vicious. I can feel him ripping apart my insides. I coughed up blood and I heard Matt running to my side. I groaned as I finally felt the deceased presence fade away. I let out a shaky breath and looked up to see that we had an audience. Everyone we were supposed to be meeting was looking at me like I was some kind of freak.
"Oh, my God, Bonnie?!" Caroline exclaimed. I coughed into my hand and Matt helped me to my feet. I winced as I moved, but physically the toll on my body feels like it's less than it has been.
"The reason we asked you all to meet us here, is because we're leaving town." I wheezed, still trying to catch my breath.
"You're what?" Elena asked.
"You're leaving?" Stefan asked.
"The witches agreed to give me back a small dose of the power, so that my body can handle the strain of the dead passing through me. It's conditional. I have to stay away from Mystic Falls and I can't help with the doppelgänger stuff anymore, or my power is gone. Matt offered to come with me, so we're going." I explained. Caroline and Elena both looked tearful. Stefan gave me a hug.
"I'm gonna miss you both." Stefan whispered. I gave him a gentle squeeze back.
"Can we come and visit you?" Caroline asked, crying. I shook my head.
"I don't think so. I'll let you know if that changes. I'm sorry to abandon you guys, but I have to do this for me. I wanna live." I sniffled, as tears pricked my eyes. "I'm gonna miss you guys." I cried as Elena and Caroline hugged me, tightly.
"I can't believe Matt is going, too." Caroline
"We humans have to stick together." Matt teased, as we broke apart. "I couldn't let my girl go alone."
"Your girl?" Elena teased, as she mopped off her face. Matt shrugged. "Does Mattie have a crush?" She sang. Matt blushed.
"So what if I do?" He gave me a sheepish smile.
"It's all the blood on my face, right? And the tears? It's such a good look." I teased. He laughed.
"I think you're beautiful, covered in blood and all." Matt hugged me to his side.
"Looks like you caught a live one, Judgy." Damon smirked.
"Shut up, Damon."
We drove in silence. Liz agreed to drive my car down later this week and fly back home. She wants to make sure that we get settled okay. We figured out of everyone the witches would be least likely to have a problem with, it would be Liz.
"Do you really have a thing for me, Matt?" I asked him, as he drove, quietly. He nodded and looked over at me.
"So, what if it is?" He teased. I grinned at him and leaned over and kissed his cheek. "I think you should do that again."
"I should do what?" I teased him, back.
"Kiss me." He repeated. I moved to kiss his cheek, but his face turned at the last second and I got his mouth. The kiss ended sooner than I would have liked, but he's driving.
"Maybe I like you back." I told him.
"Maybe?"
"Just a little," I shrugged.
"I think you like more than just a little." He laughed.
"What can I say? I'm a sucker for those blue eyes."
"Do you really think all of this is going to work out?"
"I hope so.
"At least we're together." He mused, before slipping his hand into mine. For the first time in a long time, I was looking forward to the further, hopeful even. Starting over with Matt… nothing sounded better. After all, we're only human.