Me and mother sit on the couch. In my head I'm screaming at her to snap out of it. Prim and I have lost more than ten pounds, I'm scared, and trying to keep us alive. That's more than she's doing. I get up and stand in front of her. I remain there for about five minutes before she notices my presence. She looks up at me. Her face is hollow. Both from sadness and from starvation. Does she think she is the only one that was affected by my father's death? If she does she is wrong. I can't count how many times I have held Prim while she cries. Almost every day I have to bite the inside of my cheek to keep from crying. I've sobbed while I fell asleep many nights, especially the nights I don't bring home food, and can't tell whether Prim is crying over Father or hunger.
"You can't do this," I say. It takes her a second to respond. "Do what?" she asks. She should know. She should have noticed her children dissolving into skin and bones. I feel a ball of anger lift up inside me. "You can't just sit back while Prim and I slowly starve to death." My voice is quiet and bitter. She senses my anger and reaches for my hand, which I quickly jerk away. "Don't touch me!" I can't help but scream. Mother simply sighs and turns away. My hands instantly clench into fists. I curse her under my breath. A thirteen-year-old should not have to feed her entire family. Her mother should at least help!
Just as I'm about to punch a wall, Prim walks in the front door with something tucked under her shirt. Her face is brighter than I've seen it in so long. She drops her school bag on the ground and brings me a bag full of herbs she must've picked from the Meadow after school. I let out a sigh. "Oh, good. At least we'll have some herbs to nibble on." I look through the bag. There are some edible roots, leaves, flowers, and even a few berries. There are also some medical herbs too.
I look up at Prim. She is smiling and hugging her shirt. I smile as well. "Prim? What's under your shirt?" She pulls her jacket over her extended stomach. "Nothing," A sudden meow comes from the object hidden in Prim's clothing. My smile fades, as does Prim's. She pats her stomach and whispers, "Be quiet." I pull up her shirt and the ugliest creature I have ever seen falls out. It's a cat with a mashed in nose, half of one ear missing, eyes the color of rotting squash, and his coat, a muddy yellow.
He meows and rubs up against Prim's legs. She bends down to pet him. "I found him wondering around in the Meadow. He looked so hungry, and cute. I've already named him. Buttercup. He won't get in your way, I promise Katniss! Can we keep him?" I keep my eyes on the flee infested cat, and his eyes are locked on me as well. I know we can't keep him. But how can I tell Prim no? After a minute of thinking, I decide that when Prim goes to sleep, I'll get rid of him. I can't imagine how sad and mad she'll be. But it's for the best.
I stay up until I hear both Prim and Mother snore. Slowly, without waking Prim, I get out of bed. I quietly walk over to Prim's side of the bed. Buttercup is curled up in a ball, and Prim's hand dangles protectively over him. I try not to wake her as I lift up her scrawny arm. As I pick up Buttercup he meows. I quickly grab his top and bottom jaw. "Shut up you mangy cat." He paws at my hands until he creates a gash on my finger. "Ow!" I shake the blood off my hand and throw him outside.
He lets out a quiet short hiss. I quickly fill up a bucket with water and grab him by his scruff. "Sorry, but I can't feed another mouth. He meows and I dunk him underwater. I've misjudged his strength. He thrashes back and forth, out and back in the water. Though he's strong, I'm stronger.
But before long, I hear something from inside the house. We must've woken Prim. Buttercup is hissing very loudly. I push him down harder to get it over with, but Prim comes outside just in time to stop me. When she sees what I'm doing she imminently starts to cry. Katniss, stop! Please!" She pulls him out of the water and wraps her jacket around him. She is sobbing so hard, she has to fight to breathe. I stare at her for a few minutes. I feel as if a ton of bricks have been dropped on my chest. I try to breathe, but it's hard knowing I made my sweet nine year old sister cry. I can't keep us happy, let alone alive. I begin to cry as well. I sit with my head in my hands. I try to tell Prim I'm sorry, but no words will come out.
Soon Prim comes to sit next to me and wraps her free hand around me. I don't hesitate to wrap my arms around her neck. The whole time we are embraced in each other's arms, Buttercup is hissing at me. But Prim doesn't move. She simply whispers to him, "It's okay." Just the sound of her voice soothes him, and though the words weren't meant for my comfort, they soothe me as well. When we have stopped crying I speak. "I'm sorry Prim. I would never do anything to hurt you. I just… I can hardly keep us alive, I don't know how I would feed him." She sits there quietly. There is a long period of quietness, besides Buttercups hisses. Prim is the one to break the silence between us. "Things will get better. They have to. And if you need, I can meet him in the Meadow, and keep him away from here.". I shake my head. "No, he makes you happy. Keep him. Just make sure he can get food for himself." Prim's face brightens, and a huge smile enters her face. I look down at the ugly feline. He is still hissing at me. "You'll learn to love him Katniss. And he'll love you." Sweet little Prim. I don't think we will ever come close to love.