Harry sat down heavily in a hard backed chair in the family room of the hospital. He felt numb as he processed what had happened in the last few hours. Then the tears and sobbing came as he buried his face in his hands and his body shook with each giant sob that came.
"Dr Cunningham" came a voice from beside him and he looked up and blinked a few tears from his eyes so they ran down his cheeks. He nodded and stood up to face the doctor who handed him the small bundle that was in his arms. Harry looked down at the small fragile being that was his newborn son in his arms and a fresh wave of pain flew through his body and he had to choke back a cry. "I am sorry for the loss of your wife" the doctor continued but Harry tried to block him out as he shook his head, he didn't want to hear their apologies "there were complications during the birth as you know and we couldn't…"
"I know" Harry whispered not taking his eyes off the sleeping baby in his arms he moved the blanket away slight and laughed hollowly "He's got Nikki's hair"
"Is there someone you can call?" the doctor asked and Harry nodded shortly before sitting down again and went back to tending to his son, the only link he had left to Nikki.
"I've already called him"
Just as he said this the door opened and a nurse walked in with Leo in tow, the doctor looked back at Harry who looked completely lost then nodded slightly to Leo and walked out of the room with the nurse.
"Harry what happened? Where's Nikki?" Leo asked as he sat next to his friend and reached out to move the blanket away from his godson's face and smiled. "He's beautiful".
He frowned when he didn't get a reply and looked at Harry.
"Where's Nikki?"
Harry shook his head and a fresh wave of tears slipped down his face as he hugged his son tightly to his chest and buried his face in the blanket that surrounded the newborn breathing in the comforting baby smell. Leo took in a sharp breath as he realised what had happened and had to blink back his own tears as he reached out and placed one hand on Harry's shoulder as the younger man cried. A few minutes later Harry calmed down enough to talk.
"There were…complications" Harry explained as he ran his hand over his sleeping son's blonde hair "They couldn't do anything" he sobbed but took a deep breath to stop him breaking down "My son wont ever know his mummy and how amazing and beautiful and intelligent she was and how much I love her"
Leo didn't know what to say to this so he looked down at his godchild.
"We can tell him about Nikki about how brilliant and how much we both loved her" he said after a few minutes of silence in which the baby woke up and started to fuss slightly "She wouldn't want you to mope around getting depressed however heartless I may sound"
"I know" Harry nodded and shot Leo a sad smile "I know. Now we need to name this little man" he grinned as he looked down at his son and Leo saw a fatherly pride evident in his eyes but there was also a sadness that was obvious "If we had a boy Nikki wanted to name him Lucas and I think that fits him perfectly" Harry continued "Lucas William Cunningham"
Leo nodded then frowned.
"William's my middle name"
"I know" Harry replied simply and gently placed his son into his godfather's arms.
I cant believe I actually wrote this! :( It makes me upset even thinking about it. lol! For some reason it was inspired by Bon Jovi's Bed of Roses and I have no idea why.
xxx