Author's Notes:
Back in June, I stumbled across Ameria-chan's awesome Mazoku Christmas Carols and laughed myself silly. So then I started writing a few of my own, and later expanded to some not-so-mazoku Christmas songs. I hope you enjoy singing them as much as I enjoyed writing them! ^_^
Disclaimer: I do not own Slayers or any of the original songs. This is just a parody done for fun and laughs. All of the songs take place in the Slayers universe, which is not really earth and does not have Christmas. Therefore, this is not intended to offend any Christians, other real humans, or um, dragons.
I Saw Xelloss Kissing Filia-mama
(Sung by little Val to the tune of I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus)
I saw Xelloss kissing Filia-mom
Underneath the mistletoe last night.
She blushed and turned all red,
But she didn't smash his head.
She didn't call him namagomi
Like she always had.
Then, I saw Xelloss tickle Filia-mom
And hold her to him ever so tight.
Oh, how could anyone believe
That this could ever be,
Xelloss kissing Filia-mom last night.
(Instrumental)
Then, I saw Xelloss tickle Filia-mom
And hold her to him ever so tight.
Oh, what a shock it would have been
If Lina had only seen
Xelloss kissing Filia-mom last night.
Oh, what a shock it would have been
If Lina had only seen
Xelloss kissing Filia-mamaa laaast night!
o-o-o
Blue Zelgadis Christmas
(Sung by Zelgadis to the tune of Blue Christmas)
I'll have a blue Christmas this season.
I have no cure, that is the reason.
Decorations of red
On a green Christmas tree
Won't mean a thing
If there's no cure for me.
And when the townspeople avoid me,
And when they whisper things about me,
I'll be blue as my skin
All because of my kin,
And I'll have a blue, blue Christmas.
(Instrumental)
Decorations of red
On a green Christmas tree
Won't mean a thing
If there's no cure for me.
I will be teased by Xelloss, that's certain.
He will be pleased that I will be hurtin'.
He will get a great, big feast,
That annoying purple priest,
But I'll have a blue, blue Christmas.
o-o-o
Slayers Wonderland
(Sung by Lina to the tune of Winter Wonderland)
Fireballs glow, bandits frying,
In the air, spells are flying.
A beautiful sight, those bandits in flight,
Blasting through another bandit camp.
Left behind is their treasure,
Lots of loot for my pleasure,
Magic books of old, rubies and gold,
Sifting through a blown-up bandit camp.
Gourry, let's go searching for a new sword,
One that can replace the Sword of Light.
We'll slay demons or another Dark Lord,
Any that's dumb enough to test our might!
Later on, we'll grab dinner.
A big buffet's always a winner.
Triple portions to eat, just can't be beat,
We're happy in our Slayers wonderland!
(Instrumental)
Gourry, don't you eat that final meatball!
You know what will happen if you try.
We will fight for every single morsel
Until the plates are piled a mile high.
We'll find friends as we travel,
Mysteries to unravel,
New cuisines to taste, adventures to face,
We're happy in our Slayers wonderland!
o-o-o
Fear and Pain
(Sung by a bunch of mazoku imps to the tune of Jingle Bells)
Fear and pain, fear and pain,
Hate and grief abound.
Oh what fun it is to see
Destruction all around. Yay!
Chaos wins, order ends,
No more peace on earth.
Oh what fun it is to help
Our Dark Lord gain rebirth.
(Sung to the tune of "Dashing through the snow...")
Causing wars and strife,
Corrupting kings and queens,
Ruining human lives,
What a lovely scene!
Deceive with tricks and guile,
See how Xelloss smiles.
How we love to celebrate
This day in demon style! Oh!
(Back to Jingle Bells)
Looks like hell, scream and yell,
Panic on display.
Oh what fun it is to try
To end the world today. Hey!
Dragons fall from the sky,
Kill them, don't delay.
Oh what fun it is to cause
Such mayheeemmm on Chriiistmaaaas daaaay!
Hooray!
Author's Notes: In Fear and Pain, I really wanted to say, "How we love to celebrate this day in mazoku style!" but I found it harder to sing, so I ended up using "demon style".
Coming soon:
* The Mazoku Christmas Song (Chestnuts roasting on an open fire…)
* Slayers Home for the Holidays
* A Champion of Justice (A Holly Jolly Christmas)