You frantically speed walk up and down halls and around corners trying to track her down. You can feel the steam practically leaving your ears. You're fuming. Finally, you enter the bathroom, you and Santana's bathroom, and find her there, at the sink, fixing her makeup. "Hey, looky here E-laine," you enunciate putting a lot of emphasis on her name,"I swear if you hurt Santana, I will be on you faster than you can say Glee."
You shoot daggers right through her skin with your eyes, but she doesn't seem to be fazed. You squint your eyes more, yet she still doesn't seem to care. "Um, who are you anyway?" You step back, surprised that she doesn't know who you are yet. Wow Santana, you think, first you spring your visit on me now this? I don't even really love Sam. He was just there for me after you left.
"Um, I am Brittany S. Pierce, Santana's current best friend in the world and ex lady lover. So, now that you know who i am, I will tell you again not to hurt Santana or I will hurt you." To put more emphasis on the last line, you walk up and push your finger to her chest.
"There's nothing for you to worry about Blondie, oh wait Brittany, was it?" she quips. You nod, not realizing it's a rhetorical question. "If you really are Brittany, then you would be thrilled to know that I was just pretending to be Santana's girlfriend to make you jealous. She payed me with a t-shirt and a couple of concert tickets. Happy?" She gives you a fake tight-lipped smile while raising her eyebrows and goes back to fixing her makeup in the mirror.
"Oh my god! I'm so sorry!" you say blushing rapidly. You hide your face in your hands, pivot on your heel and walk out the door, your face flushed. But, you keep a slight smile on your face the whole time because you know that San cares enough to attempt to make you jealous. That's San for ya, you think to yourself.