-1Summary: The events that lead to Temperance's death. BB

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Before She Drowned

Prologue

She was had taken the best time of his life, his future away from him. He had taken his Temperance.dead. She was dead. She was dead… It wasn't a nightmare: it was reality. He would definitely never see her, talk to her again... He wished she lay there next to him like she had done the weeks before. He wished it was just this damn kind of nightmare. The kind you wake up after and you know it's not true. She would just maneuver herself into his arms and say that it was only a dream.

Dreams aren't real. It has nothing to do with the facts, they are just the products of your imagination.

He desperately hoped she would tell him that and afterwards deliver an endless speech about Anthropologically speaking. He longed to hear her voice. But the bed was cold. She wasn't there and she wasn't going to come back.

Why did she have to go? Why hadn't he been able to save her? He would never forgive himself for that. He had left her alone with this damn bastard who pushed her into the water. She had have no change. He had taken care that she wouldn't be able to breath, to save herself. And afterwards he had shot himself in the head. He had killed her and been too cowardly to be tortured by him and to be punished for what he had done.

Booth just wanted to kill this guy for what he had done. He had taken the love of his life away from him. He

Still, he had this picture of her on his mind. He couldn't forget the way she had looked like when they told him she had died at the hospital. They had tried to save her life for a long time, but have failed. He didn't remember the way he had made it into her room, but he couldn't forget the sight. She had been incredibly pale, too pale. He just hoped that she'd sleep, but he wasn't even allowed this tiny bit of hope. Her eyes had been wide open, their beautiful green-blue colour had gone. They were cold and he wasn't able to forget the chill in them. They had been so shiny once, sometimes he had thought that he could look right onto her mind through them. They had been so pure against the fact what they had seen before. And now they have been cold. He remembered falling on her crying and screaming that she should come back that she couldn't leave him, but all hadn't done any goods. He had felt her becoming cold and hard. She had lost every last sense of her humanity. But still he had lay on top of her crying desperately and screaming her name as though he wanted to call her back to his side.

After a time Angela had come tears all over her face and told him to go home and rest. "Sweetie that isn't good for you" she had managed to keep her voice calm besides the tears that ran down when she had gotten sight of her best friend dead. Hodgins had come to the room and lay a arm around Angela to comfort her. "C'mon bud" Booth could still hear his voice. "that won't bring her back". Angela had taken his hand and they had taken him to his apartment.

They had told him to think of Parker in fear that he'd kill himself over the loss. And this truly was the only thing that kept him alive. He didn't want live without her. He couldn't even imagine to live without her. Working without her.

Tears ran down his cheek again. He could still smell her perfume on his sheets as though she would come back every moment. But she would never come back. He took in a deep breath to collect every part of it. He didn't want to forget, but it was already hard to remind himself of how her voice had sounded like, how she sounded when she laughed and the way every expression on her face had looked like. He would forget all this with the time flowing, but he didn't want to. He kept trying to remember, but the more he tried the harder it was to remind himself. He didn't only want to remember her when he looked at a picture of her. He wanted to carry her in his heart - every part of her.

He hadn't absorbed enough of her this last weeks everything had changed for good. When they had finally found the encouragement to admit their feelings to themselves and each other. It had been the best time of his live knowing that she'd be there at his side for the rest of their lives. He had loved her more than he had ever cared to admit, but he hadn't told her often enough. He wished he could tell her once more and longed to keep her save in his arms, but she wouldn't be there to hear, to feel again.

And all meant to be his fault. He kept telling himself that this was his punishment for the things he had done as a ranger. He accused God of his bad punishment and kept asking him why he hadn't taken him instead. Why she had to die suffering. But there he wouldn't get an answer either. The people that he wanted to hear answers of wouldn't reply.

He felt empty. All his emotions had been used and now he felt just powerless. He was about to give up, hoping he'd meet her again in heaven although she hadn't have believed in it.

He just wanted to see her image again and tell her that he loved her more than everything else, that she was the most important person to him. "Temperance" he heard himself whispering her name and felt a single tear on his cheek that she had kissed in what seemed like an eternity ago.

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A/N: Shall I go on with this one? Do you like it? The next chapters will tell how Booth finally asked Brennan out. Just review and tell me what you want. I live for reviews.
Btw, the character death will only be a matter in the last chapter or so apart from this one.