Title: Borrowing Christmas
By: dragoneye
Rating: K+
Written Because: Response to the Christmas Fic challenge—it's late, I know, I know! I'm sorry! But at least it's a response, right? oh gosh…

Summary: Christmas in the palace

Disclaimer: I do not own The Princess Diaries, nor do I make any money from this work of fiction.

OoOoO

The palace was silent. Shades felt like he was intruding on something sacred as he treaded down the deserted hallways towards a familiar room. Barely stopping to knock, he opened the door and was greeted, not with the kiss he expected, but with a silence-shattering shriek.

"Shades! Get out! No, I told you to stay away, get out get out get out!" Charlotte shooed him out, closing the door in his face while saying, "And don't come back," but not before he caught a glimpse of wrapping paper and various-sized boxes. Standing outside his fiancé's room, Shades grudgingly shuffled down the hallway to his own room, wishing he had a better memory.

O

On the other side of the castle, another couple shared a more romantic moment together. Clarisse snuggled closer to her husband as they sat on the couch, gazing unseeingly at the roaring fire. Joseph's arms were so strong, and his shoulder so soft, and the fire so warm, that she struggled to stay awake.

"Darling." Her husband's gentle voice made her head lift up momentarily, and he took that as a sign that she was still awake. "Perhaps we should move into the bedroom now, so I don't have to carry you after you fall asleep?"

"You mean you wouldn't carry me now?" Clarisse raised an eyebrow at Joseph and gave him a look. He cocked one right back at her for a moment, and she could tell he was trying not to give in to her. However, Clarisse's charm (and the promise of having her in his bed) was too much for Joseph, and he carried her to bed.

O

Shades sat alone in his dark room, thinking. Would Charlotte be angry at him because he walked in on her gift-wrapping spree? He hoped not. Things had been going so well that day, too. They had spent a morning throwing snowballs at each other (and occasionally at Queen Mia) before Charlotte had disappeared for the afternoon. In the evening, they had gone to the annual Christmas Eve Mass. Then Charlotte had told him she was going to prepare for tomorrow night's annual Christmas Ball, so not to bother her. Why hadn't he remembered?

Shades decided it would be best to go apologize now instead of waiting until morning, so he got up and went to Charlotte's room. This time, he managed to knock and received a "just a moment, please" in return. After a moment, her muffled voice said "come in," so he opened the door, pleased at himself for his wonderful manners.

"Char?" he said, not finding her in the dim light from her fire. Her voice came from her bedroom, though she was nowhere to be found: "Oh hello, lover boy."

Shades didn't know what to say, so he said what popped into his head. "Um, hi?"

Charlotte's laugh rang out loud and clear as she flung herself into his arms. "Mm, hello Shades."

"Since when am I 'lover boy'?"

"Since I didn't know which one you were. It's a universal term; all of my lovers can go by it." Shades had no answer for that, either. He just stood there, confused, still holding Charlotte tightly, wondering just how many "lover boys" she had, when she laughed. "Oh Shades, you know I'm just messing with your head, right?"

Actually, he didn't, but he wasn't about to tell her that, so he just stood there some more. Charlotte relaxed into his arms, sighing deeply and rubbing her check against his shoulder like a purring cat. Shades looked down at her, realizing that she was still in that day's clothes, not her pajamas or ball gown as he expected.

"Char?"

"Mmm."

"Why are you still wearing clothes?"

"What's that supposed to mean?" she asked, mind immediately heading towards the gutter.

Shades had actually not been thinking that way for a change, but he tried to stutter out a response. "Not that—I mean, your day clothes—pajamas—ah, damn it. You said you were gonna get ready for the ball tomorrow, so why aren't you wearing your dress?"

Charlotte looked at him blankly for a moment, then had to look away. "Oh, Shades," she sighed, not in her usual annoyed/incredulous/disapproving tone, but with a genuine sigh of remorse. "I lied to you."

"What?" he said, surprised. Char couldn't lie. But then again, her gift-wrapping didn't seem to have anything to do with the ball… it was too much for his mind to handle.

"I told you I was preparing for the ball, but I was really wrapping all my gifts. I'm sorry," she said, giving him a look that would melt Scrooge's heart. "I really am."

Shades didn't know what to say, so he said what popped into his head (again). "Is that where you went off to this afternoon? Buying gifts?"

"Mm hmm," Charlotte said, burying her face in his chest. "I'm sorry, Shades."

"It's alright."

They stood like that for a long moment. Finally, Charlotte broke the silence, saying, "I'm so tired…"

Shades checked his watch—well past midnight. "You should be; it's one in the morning."

Charlotte sank into him, saying again, "I'm so tired."

"Does that mean no sex tonight?"

There was none.

OoOoO

7 o'clock A.M.

Generally, the palace would not be fully awake until 8, but today was different. Today was Christmas.

Queen Mia ran around the castle like an overexcited child. "Wake up, Nicky, dear, it's Christmas!" she shouted at her husband, ripping the covers off his sleeping form and earning a muffled expletive in return. However, his annoyance didn't faze her as she ran to her grandmother's room.

"Gramma, Gramps, get up, it's Christmas!" Mia threw open the door of the suite and ran towards the bedroom, but stopped short as she reached the bedroom. "Oh, god."

Clarisse and Joseph both looked up, startled, from the bed, where they had been kissing rather fervently. Mia gaped at them. They gaped back. It was a gaping-fest. Finally, Joseph spoke.

"Haven't you learned, Mia," he said, obviously annoyed, "to knock?"

"No." Was the only response he got before Mia ran out of their room and down the hallway.

Clarisse looked at her husband, who looked back. Then they both rolled their eyes and resumed their actions beneath the mistletoe hanging on the headboard.

Meanwhile, Mia hammered on the door of her Uncle Pierre's room, yelling at him to wake up already, it was Christmas for heaven's sake! He grudgingly rolled out of bed, groaning incoherently about "only just got back, let an old man sleep" or something like that. Mia just grinned and ran away.

On the other side of the castle, Charlotte and Shades lay on opposite sides of the bed. Charlotte was wide awake, lamenting the fact that she hadn't gone to Midnight Mass with her mother as was her usual holiday tradition. Shades was wide awake, too, lamenting the fact that Charlotte hadn't used him as a pillow as was her usual nightly tradition. Looking towards the ceiling, Charlotte crossed herself, hoping the Lord would forgive her. Then she turned her head to look at Shades, who appeared to still be asleep. She rolled over, lay her head on his shoulder and put her arm around his stomach. He immediately shifted so his arms were holding her tightly around the waist.

"Hey," she said.

"Hey."

They lay unmoving for a moment until Charlotte spoke again. "I'm sorry."

"What for?"

"I dunno."

"Hm."

Another long silence. This time, Shades broke it with, "You don't have anything to be sorry for."

"I didn't go to church."

Yes, she did. She had sat right beside him in the second pew of the church; after all, how else would he have stayed awake? "Yes, you did."

"I didn't go to Midnight Mass."

Shades, being Methodist himself, didn't know why Midnight Mass was such a big deal. "I'm sorry?"

"Mum and I go every year. I didn't go with her."

"Char…"

"Am I a bad Catholic?" Charlotte lifted her head up and twisted a bit to look at him.

"Of course you're not. You're a marvelous Catholic."

"No I'm not. I've broken a Commandment. And my morals."

"Oh?"

"I lied to you, and I slept with you."

"Oh…"

"Shades?"

"Hmm?"

"When I was a teenager, I swore to myself that I'd never share a bed with a man before I married him. And he'd have to be a good Catholic boy for me to marry him. You're not a good Catholic boy, and we've already shared a bed. You make me forget all my morals."

"Char, I'm sorry…"

She pressed her nose into his chest for a moment before letting out a long sigh. "Whenever I'm with you, I forget everything. My morals, my job, my everything. Oh, Shades…"

He held her close, trying to make her feel better.

"Shades?" she said, voice very small.

"Yes, Charlotte?"

"I love you."

"I love you too, Char."

Charlotte sniffed a bit and hugged him more tightly. Shades hugged her right back.

"Shades?" she said, sounding more confident this time.

"Hmm?"

She didn't reply. He opened his eyes to find Charlotte hovering above him.

"Charlotte?"

She didn't reply. Instead, she kissed him, very lightly, on the lips. Shades inhaled sharply, not expecting such a treat after her little rant. She pulled back abruptly.

"What's wrong?" she asked, eyes swimming with worry.

"Nothing's wrong, I just didn't expect you to kiss me."

"Oh," she said, looking confused, but then kissed him again.

This time, he was expecting it, so he met her feathery kiss with one of his own. She sighed, obviously enjoying their actions. Then she moaned. Then she broke away, making Shades groan.

"Char?" he said, wondering what had happened to her.

"Yeah?"

He opened his eyes to see her nose a hair away from his own. "Why'd you stop?"

Charlotte's eyes twinkled. "Because I want more."

Shades was confused. "More? Wha—oh, more."

She rolled over, tugging him with her. Shades settled himself lightly on top of his lover, taking her in his arms and kissing her properly. Charlotte was just about to slip him the tongue when—

BANG.

"Alrighty you lovebirds, rise and shine, it's Christmas after all and we have presents to open!"

Queen Mia's lovely voice made Shades jump off Charlotte like a cork from a champagne bottle. Charlotte wasn't quite as surprised.

"Your Majesty," she said, trying desperately to keep her face its normal color and her voice level, "would it kill you to knock?"

The younger woman studied her aide for a moment before giving her a decided "yes" and turning to leave.

"Your Majesty," Charlotte said, making Mia turn around, "I hope you realize that servants don't open presents with the royal family."

"Oh really now? Well, you and Shades aren't servants; you're more like family anyways. So come on, I wanna know what I got!" And with that, the young queen bounded out of the room.

Shades peeked out from where he had taken refuge beneath the covers. "Is she gone yet?"

"Yes," Charlotte sighed, annoyed that her alone-time with Shades had been interrupted. "I suppose we'd better start getting dressed…"

"Or undressed," Shades growled, grabbing her around the waist and pulling her beneath the covers with him.

O

Half an hour later, they all gathered in the royal living room: Clarisse and Joseph on the loveseat, Mia and Nicholas sharing an oversized armchair, Prince Pierre in his very own chair, and Charlotte and Shades (feeling rather out-of-place) on the sofa.

Mia bustled about the room, distributing the gifts under the tree to their proper recipients. Finally, all the presents were handed out, and they went around the room unwrapping them. Clarisse received perfume from Joseph, a new pantsuit from Mia and Nick, diamond earrings from her son, and a wedding scrapbook from Charlotte (and Shades), which she enjoyed immensely. She and Joseph sat for a few minutes flipping through all the pages, looking at the pictures and exchanging loving glances.

"It's beautiful, Charlotte, thank you so much!" Clarisse exclaimed, smiling indulgently at the final picture of her and Joseph walking hand-in-hand down the garden path. "Perhaps I can return the favor after your wedding?"

Joseph, meanwhile, started unwrapping his gifts, which consisted of a new leather jacket from the women, new sunglasses from Shades, and a T-shirt reading "real men wear black" from Nicholas and Pierre. Needless to say, he donned the shirt immediately.

Mia was next. Her grandmother gave her a tiara; her husband, diamonds; her uncle, a watch; her aide, a sweater.

"Uncle Pierre, are you implying something?" she asked as she unwrapped the watch. Everyone chuckled. "Char, I've never worn this color before," the queen said, holding up the sweater and inspecting it closely.

"It should go well with your eyes," Charlotte assured her as Mia hugged the gift-givers.

Nicholas opened his presents next, but no one really paid attention as Mia modeled her new wardrobe.

Prince Pierre, smart man that he is, waited until people watched to open his gifts. His mother and stepfather lovingly gave him a grooming set, while his niece gave him a new shirt and Charlotte gave him a watch (not implying anything there, but because he really did need a new one).

Next came Shades, who was another recipient of sunglasses, this time from Clarisse and Joseph. His queen gave him a black shirt ("so you can look as hot as Joseph," she said); the prince gave him a belt, and Charlotte gave him cologne.

"It's my favorite," she confessed as he smelled it curiously.

"Mine isn't good enough for you?" he said, spraying some on his neck.

"Oh, yes it is. But this is better." Charlotte leaned in for a "smell" and kissed his neck, whispering in his ear, "You'll get more later."

Of course, the lovely, naughty Charlotte came next. Clarisse and Joseph gave her a matching scarf and glove set ("so you don't freeze when you throw snowballs at my granddaughter"); Mia gave her a sweater, too (green this time, which would go well with Charlotte's eyes, Mia said with a wink); Prince Pierre gave her the boxed set of Rodger and Hammerstein's classics ("I know how much you love them"); and Shades got her a beautiful necklace and earring set that she had picked out herself.

"Well, that was fun," Mia announced, standing up from the armchair and surveying the mountain of gifts and discarded wrapping paper that stood before her. "Now what?"

"Now we clean," Clarisse said. As the rest of the group began to fiddle with paper and bows, she shooed them away. "No, you youngsters go play, we'll pick up. Yes, Charlotte, that includes you," she admonished as the Parliamentarian began to protest. "Go on, now." The "youngsters" left.

"Ulterior motives, my dear?" Joseph inquired as his wife made no move to clean up.

"You know me too well, Joseph darling." Clarisse smiled at him. "You didn't think I'd only get you that jacket, now did you?"

Joseph shrugged. "I don't know, darling; I was beginning to wonder…"

"Oh, come here, you," Clarisse chuckled as she pulled her husband by the belt loop. "Happy Christmas, Joseph," she murmured, lips nearly brushing his.

"Happy Christmas, Clarisse." He closed the gap between them, and the noise of the snowball fight outside faded away, along with everything else, until the world consisted of only them and their embrace.

THE END

Well, that was lovely. Charlotte/Shades, yes, but a great deal of Clarisse/Joseph—are you happy now?

Review and you get a kiss under the mistletoe from our very own Joseph! If Clarisse will give him up, that is…