It had been a long tiresome day when we finally arrived back at the apartment. I was hot from the workout and sweat was dripping in beads down my face. I headed for the kitchen, but Obi-Wan, who had gone in ahead of me got there first. As if reading my mind he reached in the freezer and pulled out one of 'hutt-sized' popsicles. They were huge, but there exotic flavors were inspired by fruits from nine different systems. It happened to be a yellow one, which was my favorite.
I looked in after he had turned away, but to my horror he had gotten the last one. It was infuriating. Glaring at the unsuspecting Jedi Knight I lunged for it and grabbed it away.
"Anakin that's mine!" Obi-Wan cried.
"Not anymore." I taunted, making as if to open it.
As I suspected, Obi-Wan, who never gave into my taunts, turned away to hunt another snack. I proceeded to open the wrapping with a grin, not at all sorry for my self-centeredness. After all he had won the match, I needed a consolation prize.
Just as I was beginning to bring it to my mouth it left my hand and flew to the right. I shot a glare at my mentor. "Hey!" I protested.
But he was already moving away from the kitchenette to catch the popsicle he had levitated over into the sitting room. I growled and gave chase, diving over a chair, but tripping on it with the top of my foot I unintentionally tackled him.
And bumped him and knocked the precious popsicle to the floor. It broke into several small pieces and Obi-Wan turned to glare at me. "Anakin!" I expected a lecture on respect, giving, or selfishness, and steeled myself for a proper dressing down. However, it was not forthcoming.
"I tripped!" I said, pointing to the chair in the middle of the floor.
"You stole it from me in the first place!" His tone was strangely playful. I began to get confused at first.
"You should think of your poor Padawan first!" I knew that argument was totally senseless, but Obi-Wan had stolen the last popsicle. This wasn't a matter to be taken lightly.
"And what about your poor mentor?" Obi-Wan countered.
"He can go buy more." I pouted.
"Not for you I won't." Obi-Wan said, sticking out his tongue.
I lunged for him again and he quickly took several long strides to reach the kitchenette. He reached in the fridge as I caught up and I heard a small click and something being shaken from inside. He was up to something, and the few moments of hesitation cost me dearly.
Whip cream was mercilessly streaming at me - my face, shoulders, and neck taking the worst of the assault.
"Master!" I cried, laughing at the ridiculousness of the situation. I was the primary troublemaker of our duo, with my mentor's stern admonishments to follow whatever escapade I got up to.
"Surrender fiend?" Obi-Wan asked, adopting a space-pirate voice.
"Never!" I cried, grabbing the first thing that came to hand.
It happened to be a carrot. I looked at it, annoyed that it couldn't be a knife or something else more fierce, but Obi-Wan had run out of whip cream, so I had the upper hand.
And I chose to throw it right at him. I realized the stupidity of the choice as it made a loud thunk on his head. He stared at me for a moment, probably trying to figure out why I had made such a foolish error (a Jedi's weapon is his life, after all). However, he simply reached back into the freezer and pulled out a bag of grapes.
"Prepare to die!" Obi-Wan said, hurling them.
The little balls of fruit actually do hurt when hurled with enough force, and I had no shame in ducking away behind a chair. I got an idea and used the Force to bring a frying pan to my hand. Using it as a shield I inched my way along the counter to get a knife and swung it triumphantly. "Aha!" I said, approaching him. "I think not!"
Obi-Wan actually did back away, towards the couch in the sitting room. Discarding the frying pan, I continued to brandish my blade, though I could never do any serious damage to my friend. He grabbed a pillow to act as a shield and I sliced without thinking.
Stuffing went everywhere. I expected Obi-Wan to be furious, but he merely used my moment of distraction to firmly kick the blade from my hand and then tackle me onto the couch. I rolled us off and landed on top. "Ha ha ha Obi-Wan. You are finished for - "
Obi-Wan got a fistful of stuffing and shoved it in my mouth before I had a chance to complete my sentence. I sputtered and spat, trying to rid myself of it, but Obi-Wan used the distraction to roll me off of him and pin me instead. "Ha!" He cried, his face full of triumph.
"Oh alright..." I went limp.
Obi-Wan's hold loosened. "You give so easy Padawan!"
I slammed him to the floor with playful force, but I got him in a lock as well. "And you are very gullible Master." I cooed. The next sensation I was experiencing made me realize that Obi-Wan had begun to use the Force in direct attack. I was acutely uncomfortable and I had to move. I couldn't stand it.
Finally I released him and desperately adjusted myself. "Wedgies are forbidden!"
"You didn't call it at the beginning!" Obi-Wan said gleefully.
"I didn't have time!"
Obi-Wan shrugged. "You started it."
I wanted to growl something disrespectful in huttese, but instead I focused my energies on again besting him. He had risen and gone towards the kitchenette again and I ran to follow him.
And the next thing I knew I was on the floor, dazed and winded. Obi-Wan was regarding me with a look of concern, but I was alright. I looked back to see I had slipped on the popsicle and shrugged. "Making booby traps now are we?" I asked, pushing myself up.
Once he was certain I was still game he continued towards the kitchenette. I gave chase and he proceeded to grab the cup of water I had left on the counter earlier. I was coming too fast to stop myself and he splashed me in the face.
What debris from the whip cream that I still had clinging to me was washed away and I sputtered, using my hands to clear my eyes. "Master!" I again grabbed the nearest thing to hand, which was again not that helpful. I looked at the sprinkles like they were traitors.
"Going to frost me weak one?" Obi-Wan taunted.
I shot him a look that spoke of torment to come and I popped the top off. He looked at the useless cup in his hands and then reached for something else to either attack or defend with. Before he had a chance I grabbed him by the collar and poured the edible confetti down his back.
He spent several moments hopping about trying to rid himself of them, but his sweaty back made them cling to him. He finally gave up and instead reached for a bottle on the counter. I unkindly began to press his shirt to his back, mashing up the sprinkles into the fabric.
When he turned around, I felt something being drizzled on my hair. I backed away and saw him grinning devilishly as he held the honey jar in plain sight.
"You won't find me so sweet in a minute!" I hissed, reaching for a red glass sitting on the counter. However, my wet hand slipped and it shattered onto the floor in about a million pieces.
Just then, the door opened.
"Oh no..." I heard Obi-Wan breathe. It was then that I remembered that today was room inspection day. A rather pointless waste of time (in my opinion) that happened once every ninety days. It was Mace Windu's least favorite chore, but he was the assigned inspector for our floor.
And so he was always very strict. It was not uncommon for him to pick apart the smallest little details simply because he could. And now he was stumbling in to find the apartment in a disaster.
His wide eyes roamed the room with stuffing, a destroyed pillow, a mushy popsicle, grapes, a carrot, honey, a frying pan, whip cream, a knife, water, and sprinkles strewn around like a war zone. I doubted my explanation about the last popsicle would do any good in this matter. We were in trouble.
I timidly looked at my mentor, who stepped forward, opening his mouth. "Master Windu I - "
The dark-skinned Jedi Master held out a hand. "Let me guess, your Padawan forgot what today is?" He asked.
"No, actually, I did. This is my doing." Obi-Wan replied.
I was astonished he was defending me. "No, I helped." I quickly said, stepping forward. Obi-Wan sent me a proud smile and we boldly faced Mace Windu. The punishments for failed room inspections could be severe, and I braced myself for the worst.
But Master Windu just looked at Obi-Wan quizzically. "Should I even ask, or should I just say you are your mentor's student and return in an hour?" He stressed the time to make it quite clear we had one chance of redeeming ourselves.
"I'd be obliged if you'd give me the opportunity for redemption Master." Obi-Wan said, looking a bit shamefaced, but I sensed no regret in his tone. He had given no apology even.
Master Windu nodded and turned to leave while Obi-Wan looked back with a small smile. "Let's clean up - quickly." He said, businesslike, but still in good humor.
"Wait, Master, I don't understand, what did he mean?"
Obi-Wan smiled fondly at the memories as he began to clean the stuffing. "Qui-Gon and I once got into a similar battle. I had complained of him being boring and he'd retaliated."
I stared at him. "Honestly I thought you were going to kill me at some points..." I admitted.
Obi-Wan winked at me. "Anakin, I have plenty of time left to boss you around, yell, and discipline you, I think I can manage a few fun moments too."
"I have the wisest mentor in the temple." I replied fondly. "I'm going to buy you a whole box of those popsicles." I promised, moving to rapidly clean the kitchen floor.
"No need, I already have an extra box in the freezer." Obi-Wan said.
And then I was certain I had the best mentor in the temple.
A/N: Harmless little comedy fic. Sister needs some reading material for a week at camp and I threw this together in about two hours. It was really fun to write.