Name: Months
Author: Narni
Book: The Host (Stephenie Meyer)
Rating: T
Pairing: Ian/Wanda (minor Mel/Jared)
Spoilers: Yep
Status: Work In Progress
Summary: It's been four months since the ending of The Host. Wanderer, Ian and others are peacefully - or as peacefully as possible - living their lives in the caves and for a moment it seems that everythings perfect. Then things begin to change rapidly. How do Wanderer and Ian cope with everything? Can love really overcome all difficulties?
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters or the world of The Host, just playing with it. I do not make any money from this, nor do I want to disrespect Stephenie Meyer's lovely work.
A/N: This is the first story I've ever written in English, apart from boring assignments in my English class. I'm actually Finnish, and write this in order to get some practice for my matriculation examination this autumn, so if you notice some major grammar or vocabulary mistake, please let me know! Also, comments are very much appreciated :)
Prologue
Love and longing
"Oh, for God's sake, Wanda, cut that out!" Mel groaned and buried her face against her hands. Her expression was pained. It wasn't difficult to think of a reason. The sound I was making - the sound of fingertips tapping against the kitchen table - seemed innocent enough for me, but all of my friends in the caves found it annoying. So annoying, in fact, that they'd started to avoid me whenever they could. Only Mel was brave enough to stick with me and my annoying habits. I'd tried to "cut that out", as she so nicely phrased it, but I couldn't help it. I was so downright nervous these days, I just had to tap my fingers against every surface I could find, or I'd end up chewing my fingernails again. I couldn't help it.
"Do you think they'll be back today?" I asked, stirring the bubbling red liquid that was slowly turning into tomato soup.
"I really hope so", Mel said, still annoyed. "Someone's going to throw you to the river one of these days, if Ian's not back soon."
I blushed deep red.
"I'm sorry, I'm just..."
"Pathetic?"
I was going to say nervous, but I supposed pathetic described me just as well. Ian and the others had been on a raid for - what, fourteen days now? Or sixteen? - and I was already a nervous wreck. Sure, the others were restless too, but I was pretty sure I was the only one who couldn't sleep. Already had I started to look like a ghost, what with my pale face and dark circles under my eyes. Every time I tried to sleep bad images flashed through my eyes. I kept thinking about every little thing that could go wrong, every way they could end up captured... I so wished I could have gone on the raid with them. That had been the original plan, but those plans had changed abruptly when I'd stumbled on the uneven cave floor and twisted my ankle. With my swollen leg and self-made crutches there was no way I could have participated, so they - Ian, Jared and Brandt - had left without me. Ian, of course, had been extremely relieved about the change of plans (he still didn't like taking me on the raids), but that was that. Surprisingly, Melanie had volunteered to stay with me, so here we were - anxious, testy and impatient.
It was difficult to say, which one of us found the waiting harder. For me it was hard, because I was still getting used to these complex human emotions called love and longing. Mel found it difficult, because she had almost lost Jared once, and knew what it felt like - being separated from the one you truly love. We both did our best to assure each other that this was not the case. Ian and Jared would come back. Soon. Then everything would be all right again. In the meantime, though -
"Wanda! If you tap your fingers one more time - "
"Sorry", I said again.
Mel shook her head, more amused than angry. "I sure hope he's worth the trouble."
At that, I blushed again. By he she meant Ian O'Shea, my partner. As for being worth the trouble... He was. I knew it wasn't much when I said I'd never loved anyone as much as I loved him, but it was true. I truly did love him. With my body, heart and soul. We had been inseparable ever since my rebirth as Petals Open To The Moon, and I'd grown to depend on him. Though I had learned enough about humans to understand that they weren't all cruel and violent, I still found Ian extraordinary among them. He was kind, honest and loving in a way that only a soul would be. Of course, I never said that out loud. For humans a soul wasn't the most beautiful compliment. For me, it was.
I was still ill at ease with the war between souls and humans - my family and my friends. Ever since I had showed Doc how to take souls safely out from humans his side had been making progress. I guess I was happy about that - as long as they kept their promise and sent my little relatives safely to another planet. Still, I sometimes felt guilty about giving the information to Doc. Ian tried to assure me it was nothing to feel guilty about. Mel said it didn't matter the slightest. I had been in her head for so long, she knew I was going to feel guilty anyway.
I was awaken from my thoughts as Jamie stepped into the kitchen, loudly as ever. He smiled at both us, tapped me on the head and leaned closer to take a peek at the stewing soup.
"Tomato again?" his tone was dissatisfied.
"Sorry, kid", Mel grinned. "That's all we have left."
Jamie sighed and sat down. "I hope they come back soon."
"I'm sure you're not the only one", Mel said, taking a mischievous glance in my direction. I did my best to keep from blushing - after all, I was not the only one either. Like Ian and I, also Mel and Jared had become inseparable. An unit. That's how we spoke about them. Mel and Jared. They did the same, too. Ian and Wanda. Now with the men gone it was all wrong. She was just Mel, and I was just Wanda again. It felt... wrong. Like I was half a person. Melanie would probably have said that I sounded pathetic again, were she able to hear my thoughts. Sometimes I missed that. Her knowing everything I thought, her commanding voice in my head. Still, it was better to have two bodies. After all, there were only so many things one body could do...
More people began gathering into the kitchen as I laid plates on the table. They had a miraculous ability to smell food, these people - even if it was just tomato soup that they all had grown to dislike in the past two weeks. First there came Lily and Heidi, chattering so intensively they barely managed to greet me and Mel in-between. Then Lacey - it was impossible not to notice her approaching. If I was ever truly annoyed, then it was because of her. She really couldn't stop whining. This time she seemed to be complaining about tomato soup - big surprise there. I tuned her high-pitched voice out as usual and smiled at Sunny, who slid inside behind Kyle. She had been here for three months, yet she still wasn't comfortable, when she wasn't near Kyle. She said she still kept looking for Jodi, but right now it looked like she had come to stay. Even Kyle seemed to have accepted that. Behind them came Doc, hand in hand with Sharon, who ignored me as always. Some things never changed.
Soon, the room was filled with disappointed sighs and groans.
"Tomato soup..."
"Tomato!"
"So boring - "
"If they don't come back today, I swear I'll - "
"Shh! There are ladies present!" Lily reminded Kyle, who was demonstrating what he would do to the raiders. "And personally, I don't think Wanda and Melanie would be happy if you throttled their men."
"Their men aren't doing their job", Lacey complained. "Unless they are trying to starve us to death."
"No one is going to starve you to death", Mel said in a loud voice. "Though for some of us, that would be certainly preferable."
The others chuckled, not bothering to hide their delight about Melanie's skill to voice their thoughts. Lacey looked hurt. It was good she wasn't allowed to go on raids. I was sure she'd have turned us all in just to get better living accommodations.
I laughed silently to myself. I was becoming more and more human every day. Just look at me! I was already able to think badly about other people. Not that I was proud about it. It just... Well, it felt like Lacey deserved it. After all, she didn't bother to think kindly about anyone.
Suddenly it became very dark. Big pair of hands pressed on my eyes, covering everything.
"What are you smiling about?" a familiar voice said. I would have recognized that voice everywhere.
I turned around, and he let his hands fall just in time for me to see his lovely face. Ian. My Ian. My anchor. He looked the same as ever, his beautiful blue eyes smiling lovingly at me. My heart began to beat rapidly, as if trying to break free from my chest and meet his.
He smiled and slid his arms around me, pulling me on my feet. As I got up I noticed he wasn't the only one who had arrived. Brandt and Jared had returned too, the latter greeting Melanie with a kiss that made me turn my head away. Sometimes, when Jared showed out of nowhere like this, I'd get confused about my feelings for him. I would feel jealous. I hated that feeling. After all, he wasn't the one I was meant to be with.
I turned my attention back to Ian and felt my heart melt into soft, warm liquid. This was the one person I belonged to.
"How's your ankle?" Ian asked in a concerned tone. He really hadn't wanted to leave me for the raid - not when I had been unable to walk. Sure, I'd had crutches, but, being Ian he probably would have wanted carry me around anyway.
I lifted my leg. "As good as new. It doesn't hurt anymore."
"Good", he said simply and leaned in to kiss me full on the lips. His arms tightened their hold of me, pulling me closer. I didn't object. It felt good to feel his body against mine after such a long time. Long? It had been only two weeks, I realised then. This longing was really an intense feeling - too intense. Being with him was so much better.
"Get a room", Jamie chuckled good-naturedly, as Ian's hands began to roam all over my back.
He pulled away, his arms still around me.
"You eaten?"
"Yes", I said, a little out of breath. Actually, I hadn't - there was still a good amount of reddish soup in the bowl. But I wasn't really hungry anymore. That craving had been replaced with a stronger one.
"Good."
I gasped, as he picked me up to his arms and carried out of the room, towards the little cave we'd started to call our room. It felt strange, having a home like that. Strange, but lovely.
He set me down on the floor, kicking the door shut behind us. Then he reached for me again.
"God, I've missed you", he breathed and leaned down to capture my lips between his once more. I was going to say I had missed him too, but there wasn't really any chance for that - not now, not when his fingers tangled in my long golden hair, not when his other hand wandered all over my body. All I could do was put my arms around his neck and pull him even closer, until there was no space between us. Just us. Exactly the way I wanted it to be.
Hours later, we lay on the mattress, too tired to move. I smiled drowsily as Ian stroked my hair. It felt good to be with him this way, so close I could feel his heartbeats against my ear. His familiar scent, the one I'd been missing, filled every inch of senses, keeping me awake though my body ached for rest. I hadn't been able to sleep properly for so long.
In a way, it was funny, I suppose. At first I had found it strange to fall asleep in someone's arms - after all, I'd spent all my human life sleeping alone. Now it seemed I couldn't relax without Ian's arms wrapped tightly around me. I didn't feel shy around him anymore - at least, not the way I used to. The first time we had made love I'd blushed so furiously I had been sure I would remain red for the rest of my life. But now... Now it was all different. I had nothing to be afraid of anymore. Ian had taken care of that. The only fear I had left was the one of losing him.
Sensing my thoughts, he leaned closer and gently caressed my cheek with his thumb.
"You're like a porcelain-doll", he murmured with a wondering smile. "So fragile... I'll never let anyone hurt you."
"The only thing that could hurt me now is losing you", I whispered.
"That will never happen, you know. I'll always be here for you."
"I love you, Ian."
"And I love you, my Wanderer. More than I've ever loved anyone", he said seriously.
Then he leaned in closer and kissed me again, slowly and gently, as if to drown all my fears. He was right. We were an unit, we would always be together. No matter what.
So why did I feel like we still had a long way ahead us?
