Disclaimer: Evangelion is the property of Gainax and Pearls Before Swine is owned by the supreme human being that is Stephan Pastis.

Nerv HQ.
Tokyo-3.

In his darkened office, Gendo Ikari watched his deputy Kozo Fuyutsuki turn as pale as Rei, as he listened to the frantic message over the phone.
"It disappeared?! The entire Second Branch just vanished?!"

United States.
A few weeks earlier.

Larry was not having an easy time trying to get his voice heard over the din.

"Bruddahs! Bruddahs! Calm down! Dis is da executive boardroom of Eetazeeb Corporayshun, not sum watering hole! Me calls for order! Floyd! Shut mouf!"

The hubbub culminated in the sound of a gunshot, followed by silence, as all eyes turned to the still smoking gun being waved, menacingly, by a duck. A duck with an attitude, and an arsenal to match.

After a few seconds, the duck broke the silence. "Thank you, gentlemen."
With a nod to the cat sitting beside him, "My esteemed colleague and I were invited here in order to do business with who we were led to believe were fellow professionals. I sincerely hope I was not mistaken in coming here. I'd hate to have wasted my time. After all, time is money, and I could always do with a new pair of croc skin boots."

Silence met his words, as most of the board proceeded to try and make themselves as small a target as possible. Finally, Larry broke the silence.

"Meester Duck, we'd want you and your friend to get us a masheen. A big one. We theenk it is in Neevaduh, and your pay will be gud."
"Nevada, huh? What kind of machine? Car, plane, secret spy thing from Area 51? Heh, heh."
"We want you to get us da big Evan-jellybean robot from da NERV base there."

It's not too often one could shut Guard Duck up, or even rarer, make Mr. Snuffles's jaw drop, but Larry Da Croc became one of the few individuals on planet Earth to succeed.

"You want us to break in to NERV's second branch, one of the most heavily guarded places on Earth, a place that makes Area 51 look like Times Square, and you want us to steal an eighty metre high robot?"
"Yep! You is da smart duck!"
"You have got to be kidding. Have you any idea what would happen if we were found-"
"Meow."
"Are you serious?"
"Meow...meow."
"What did cat say?"
"He says it will be a good challenge for someone of his skills, but wants to know where you're going to put it after we deliver it. After all, it's not the easiest thing to hide a giant robot that the entire UN will be looking for."
"Ohhh... me not theenk about that. Mebbe me park it in basement."

"What? Okay, this meeting is OVER. We're outta..."
"Meow. Purrrr..."
"Yeah, you're right. They're not going to look for it if they think it's destroyed. Okay crocs. You got yourself a deal, on one condition." He named a figure.

Some of the crocs paled, but nodded. Guard Duck wasn't finished, however. "Oh, and you pay in advance."