I do not own Chris McClean, or Chef Hatchet. All challenges and these two characters belong to Tom McGillis and Fresh TV

Current Campers:

Aaron (The Tennis Pro), Lee (The Risk-Taker), Brandon (The Marksman), Haley (The Anime Lover), Amber (The Crazy Actor), Sarah (The Panda Friend), George (The Dictator), Joey (The Historian), Austin (The Scientist), Hanbei (The Sleepy Genius), Jack (The Sensitive One), Connor (The Megalomaniac), Evan (The Window Waver), Kinect (The Wizard), Sherlock (The Phobiac), Addie (The Disguised), Wallace (The Fancy Fanatic), Isaac (The King), Jewel (The Depressant), Anton (The Rocketeer), Director (The Commander)

Chris was dusting himself off from the last episode unhappily. He looked up at the camera, and grinned. "So, any way!" He said. "I'm your completely overqualified host, Chris. McClean." He paused after his first and last name, to exaggerate the fact that he was a little proud of himself.

Pika had come falling out of the sky, and he landed into Chris, knocking them both in the ground, except for Pika, who went straight off the dock and into the lake.

"Where did you come from?!" Chris exclaimed. Not that he was happy his boss had come flying out of the sky. Purely out of incredulousness.

Pika grinned as the camera changed views, to show both Chris, looking down in him angrily on the dock, and Pika, who was treading water below. "Rumor has it, the stork brought me," he said innocently.

The camera then changed to Chef, who was holding his pasta rocket, and laughing his head off. "Hey." He said seriously. "He told me to," he burst out laughing again.

"Roll the intro...! AGAIN!" Chris appeared, jumping out of a robotic gopher, then a bass, and then a random tree.


Dear Mom and Dad I'm doing fine

The words were written on paper, evidently with quill pen, and the camera zoomed out to reveal Evan thinking to himself thoughtfully, tapping the feather of the quill pen against his lip, while Sarah leaned over him, double checking his work.

You guys are on my mind

Wallace's scarf was blowing gently in the breeze as he stuck a pose. Another Wallace walked into the frame, then pulled off it's face mask, revealing Addie, who snickered playfully. Director rolled his eyes, while Anton laughed.

You asked me what I wanted to be

Hanbei was curled up for a nap, while Aaron looked at him angrily. Haley was watching anime on her laptop blissfully, and Connor was slowly appeared behind her, grinning toothily.

And I think the answer is plain to see

Austin was holding two liquids, and poured one into the other, and it explodes, leaving his hair blown back, and a shocked look on his face. Joey jumps in, picks up the two containers, and fill them up with different liquids, and hands it back to Austin, who thanks him by blowing himself up... again.

I wanna be... famous

Lee grabs a calvary sword and fences with Kinect, who uses his wand to fend him off. Kinect attempts to use a magic spell, but fails, resulting in Lee winning the match.

I wanna live close to the sun

Wallace appears again, looking smug as usual, and grins, causing the camera to black out. When it reopens, Sarah is picking it up, to focus in on Austin who has blown himself up again.

Go pack your bags because I've already won

Brandon picks up a bow and arrow, and instructs Isaac to do so as well, which he does obediently, and they both fire the bow at the same time, but Brandon lands a bullseye, and the target is sent flying into a wall. The camera turns back to the two shooters, where Brandon is looking smug, and Isaac is gaping.

Everything to prove, nothing in my way; I'll get there someday

Jack was trying to compete in a marathon against Connor, and as they both took off, Jack tripped and fell, and it was revealed his shoe laces were tied together. Connor patted him on the head, while Jack gave the camera a dirty look

'Cause I wanna be... famous

Amber acts like she's dead, and when Sherlock enters the frame, he freaks out and runs away shouting something. Amber laughs, while Addie seems unamused at her acting abilities.

Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na

Aaron bounces a ball on his tennis racket happily, while Brandon prepares a bow and arrow. Aaron flinches, and jumps, dropping the racket, as the ball pierces the tennis ball

Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na (I Wanna Be!) (I Wanna Be!) (I Wanna Be Famous!)

The camera focused in on a game of Risk, where Evan was pulling his hair out, Joey was looking nervously at the board, and Director was looked very devious indeed.

Whistling Chorus

Jack is face first on his log, Sherlock appears mortified, and Kinect appears to be doing some ritual, but other than that, all the contestants look normal


"Now that we've sorted that... issue it's time to meet our contestants!" Chris grinned. "First, we'll introduce the original three contestants from Total Drama Golden, our winner, Sarah!"

Sarah entered the scene, looking clearly unhappy. "You left Emily out of the roster... again!"

"Of course. You're little alliance with her the first season was way to overpowered. Besides. She finished fifth, while you finished first so..." Chris shrugged. "You are the better competitor, which is what we want."

Haley had entered the scene. "She only won because I let her," she said smugly.

"Actually, she beat you in the race to the finish line, even though you won the first parts of the challenge," Aaron corrected, entering the screen. "Which is kind of shameful to be completely honest."

Haley smacked Aaron upside the head with her laptop, and he fell down onto the dock. "Care to say that again?" She narrowed her eyes.

"Um.. no?" Aaron said. There was clearly fear in his eyes. The Anime Freak had him completely freaked out.

Chris cleared his throat. "Also presenting, the runner-up anime freak Haley," he waved his hand, and Haley waved at the audience. "And our seventh place finisher of TDG, the tennis pro Aaron!" Aaron got up and dusted himself off.

"We all know how to intimidate Aaron now," Hanbei said teasingly, entering the frame. He had grayish-black hair, and was wearing bright yellow and blue sleeping clothes. "To think that the tennis player could be beaten by the power of anime."

Chris grinned. "Ladies and gentlemen! A fan favorite, and the second half of the Sleepers team from the Riveting Race. Hanbei!" Hanbei waved, not looking very sleepy at all."

"Since when do you break character?" Sarah said suspiciously. "You don't seem sleepy."

Hanbei said sadly. "I've been so nervous for this competition, it's given me insomnia. Now that I'm on camera, I'm on adrenaline! I'll never get any sleep."

"You get so much, it doesn't really matter any way," Aaron grumbled.

Haley narrowed her eyes. "Hey, don't offend Hanbei." Hanbei looked gratefully at her, and she grinned at him.


"Too be honest, I could care less about Hanbei," Haley said in the confessional. "I just like beating up Aaron."


"Sherlock!" Chris announced. "Everyone's favorite coward, and the guy with too many phobias to count."

The Phobiac had entered the frame nervously. Sherlock wore a dress shirt, which was without any wrinkles. It was neatly tucked into a pair of black pants. He wore black shoes, giving him a very formal look. Aaron shook his hand, and Sherlock looked a little more confident. The he looked down. "WATER!" He yelled.

He leapt away closer inland, and started shivering.

"It's... water," Aaron said reasonably. "It can't hurt you if we are on the dock."

Sherlock shivered. "Do you know how many people water has killed over the years?" He asked, with his teeth chattering.

"No?" Aaron said. "That's probably impossible to know."

"I wouldn't know," Sherlock admitted. "I'm too scared to look it up."

Sarah and Hanbei looked at him sympathetically, while Haley looked at him in disgust. "You are too afraid to learn a little statistic that might actually help your argument?" Haley scoffed.

"Yes," Sherlock said. "That and my fear of Google."

Aaron blinked. "You are afraid of GOOGLE?"

Sherlock shuddered. "Don't judge me! They watch everything you look up! They are watching someone right now! Stalkers!" He added.

Sarah appeared to be mulling it over, and then nodded to show she could see why Sherlock was scared. Hanbei looked terrified now, and evidently was shrinking.

"I'd let you keep talking," Chris said scornfully. "But I've got to introduce the next contestants. We've got our possible antagonists. Meet Addie, Connor, and Orson!"

Connor entered the frame first, pushing his way out of the way of Orson and Addie. "Where's my money?!" He demanded.

Haley rolled her eyes, while Aaron jumped into the air.


"Of all the contestants to return, why HIM?!" Aaron said melodramatically. "He freaks me out more than Haley, Addie, Javert, and Courtney combined!" He paused. "What ever happened to Javert any way?"


Connor wore a Boy Scout T-Shirt, along with jeans, tennis shoes. He had blonde hair, and was holding one of his cans of Mountain Dew (Me: Did I get that right?) (Editor: Yep.) "I'm in it to win it this time!"

"By the power of caffeine?" Haley raise an eyebrow. "Good luck."

"Actually," Orson said. He wore all white, and had gray hair, combed to the side, looking him look elder than the contestants other than him. "I wouldn't be talking, runner-up." He said the last words in a sneer. "Also Chris," He said scornfully. "Call me Director."

Addie snorted. "Control freak much?" She asked.

"Yes, very much so," Director replied. "Not as much as Connor though."

Connor rolled his eyes. "I resent that, you know."

"The villains seem to getting along," Aaron said brightly to Sarah.

Sarah snickered. "Yeah, except for Haley," she pointed to Haley who was giving Connor the look of death.

Hanbei, Aaron, and Sarah all shared a laugh.

Director put his hands behind his back (Like any true villain), and walked calmly over to the side of the dock with the other contestants.


"I think Director is my favorite villain," Sarah commented. "Haley's been nothing but rude to me after I gave her a cut of the money from TDG. Connor is... well... Connor, and Addie plain steals identities," she paused. "So... uh... good job Director."


Sherlock trembled as Connor went to stand next to him. Connor stood over him, and looked at him vilely.

"Our next contestant is Austin," Chris announced. "A true scientist, mainly because of his failures and the fact that he is still a scientist.

Austin wore a bright green shirt with a white test tube that was bubbling on it. He also wore sweat pants, and a pristine white lab coat. Austin observed the crowd of people, which included Haley giving Aaron a laptop smack, Sherlock trembling next to Connor, the smug Director, two Sarahs (Addie had posed as her).


"Dear sweet goodness, what did I walk into," Austin said, wide eyed. "The sad part is that this isn't the worst competition I've ever been to." He shuddered. "The Annual Science Convention of 2010. THAT was weirder than this. Surprisingly."


"Um... hi," Austin said, a little overwhelmed when Aaron offered him his hand. "Is this really the cast Chris and Chef went with?" He paused, looking at Aaron's stern face. "No offense of course," he added hastily.

Aaron sighed. "None taken."

Director shrugged at Austin's comment. Connor wasn't paying attention, Sherlock flinched, Haley drummed her fingers against the laptop, Hanbei was curled up on the ground, hoping to sleep, and Sarah and Addie didn't care.

"Our next contestants," Chris announced. "The egotist, supposedly beautiful kid; Wallace! Along with the supposed wizard, in a wimpy cape; Kinect!"

Wallace was blabbing about something or other, and Kinect was plugging his ears. "You seriously stuck me with HIM?!" Kinect exclaimed angrily. "I would have been stuck with ANY ONE else than him!"

"None of us feel any sympathy," Director said harshly, crossing his arms.

Kinect narrowed his eyes at Director. "Gee. Thanks."

"So as I was saying about hair care," Wallace continued on his rant.

Addie was clearly unhappy. "No one cares!"


"People take my disguising abilities for granted," Addie said grumpily. "I have to dye, and then undo my hair. I create those masks out of paper, and it takes, like, two hours to make them to perfect accuracy. I have to bring a lot of clothes to dye and stuff, and then I have to grow three inches, or worse, shrink!" She crossed her arms unhappily. "Needless to say, I'm really underpaid."


Wallace continued anyway. And Aaron had reached into his suitcase. He pulled out a bar of soap and shoved into Wallace's mouth. "No," Aaron said. "Bad. Stop it."

The Pretty Boy seemed shocked, and looked innocently at Aaron.

"Do you promise not to talk about beauty or anything you-related for the rest of the episode?" Aaron asked scornfully.

Wallace nodded and said something muffled.

"Alright," Aaron said. "You can keep the soap bar by the way," he said, removing the soap and giving it to him.


"I hate him more than I hate Alysson," Wallace said grumpily.


"I like this guy," Director claimed. "Not much of a competition though."


Here are your first couple of contestants! Hope you enjoy them, and the rest of them should be out tomorrow! Let me know what you think of them! And finally: Here is a little clue as to the series ;)

Here it is: Mountains and Red Eyes