Perfect Promise

Chloe stared at the computer screen in horror. She couldn't believe that the green "light" that represented Oliver on the computer screen had disappeared before her eyes. Who or what had taken him? Where had they taken him? Had she really just lost the man she loved? She could not believe that she had just opened her heart fully for the first time in her life only to have it obliterated in an instant. And now with . . . , she couldn't even finish the thought in her head.

With the satellite feed up and running, which thank God, Oliver had been able to accomplish just before his ambush, she was able to contact the rest of the team. Trying to keep her voice steady, she relayed to them Green Arrow's last known location and asked, or more like, begged for someone to go find him. She was not sure where Clark was. Had he transported himself with the rest of the Kandorians to another world? The team said things had been quiet since they had last been in communication. That must mean they were gone, right? Had she lost Clark too? This was all too much for her to take.

She could barely breathe. Her legs were shaky and her stomach was in knots. If there had been any food in it, she was sure she would have thrown up. She had been doing that a lot lately and she didn't think she could handle anymore. She sat down in her chair staring blankly at the screen, hoping and praying that Oliver's "blip" would reappear. She thought back to these last several months. Everything had happened so fast between her and Oliver. She had always been his friend and sidekick, as he would jokingly call her, and then they became lovers, or more like "friends with benefits." She hadn't been able to put "love" into the factor at first. It had been far too frightening.

Her mind momentarily wandered to thoughts of Jimmy. She had loved him, really she had. He had been good to her and had given her his love and attention at a time when she needed it. Deep down though, she knew things probably would never have lasted between them. For some reason, she had always held back a part of herself; part of her heart. There were too many secrets, too many trust issues. But the guilt she carried over his death at the hands of a man she had also had feelings for, was almost more than she could bear. That, coupled with the fact that Clark and her friendship had taken a major hit, was what had finally caused her to shut down emotionally. She immersed herself in work; allowed it to consume her. She had retreated from the real world more comfortable in the virtual one instead. She had turned into a stranger, a shadow of her former self, even blurring ethical lines occasionally. And when she was confronted by Steven Swift, the boy in the superhero's body, with the question of when she last had any fun, she, in all honesty, could not remember.

Later that same night, with Steven's words still swirling in her head, she had walked into the Clocktower, not knowing that her life was about to change forever. Oliver was there target shooting. It hadn't really occurred to her that he had been hanging around a lot more lately. He shared his bottle of whiskey and then giving her instructions in the fine art of archery, he had placed his arms around her, to show her how to hold the bow and told her to listen to the beats of her heart to know when to let go of the arrow. She felt certain that he himself could hear her heart beating, because it was pounding in her head and she thought it was quite possible it would burst from her chest. As far as "letting go" went, she did let go; in a big way. That night she let go of inhibitions and passions and desires she didn't even know existed; all these feelings that seemed to have been bottled up inside of her. The next morning she was grateful that she had been wearing nice lingerie for a change, not that it had stayed on very long, but normally when she dressed in the morning, she just didn't even care. There was no one who would see it. She blushed at the thought. But that morning, she also had awoken to complete and utter fear. What had she just done? Would he regret it, being with her? She certainly didn't. I mean after all this was Oliver Queen. He was gorgeous. He was . . . perfect. But she was convinced that he must have only been with her, because she had been available. Yet, the night had been so incredible; so powerful. She didn't have a whole lot of experience in the area of intimacy, but she had never felt so alive and open before, and it scared the hell out of her. So she quickly put back up her walls and tried to make light of everything. She told him they could continue to get together, if he wanted to, because she definitely wanted that, oh my word, did she want that, but there would be "no strings attached", no labels. They would just have "fun". And it was fun, because being with him was amazing. But over time she could sense things changing between them. The feelings and emotions seemed to be intensifying. She saw the looks he was giving her when he thought she wasn't looking. She was just still too scared to let go of control. It was funny, because she had always thought of herself as brave. After all, she helped lead a group of superheroes fighting crime and evil, for heaven's sake! Why was it, in matters of the heart did she become such a chicken, almost paralyzed from the fear?

So she kept holding back from Oliver, not believing that he could really be interested in her: plain, old Chloe Sullivan. How could he, when he had supermodels falling all over themselves to get to him; how could he want her instead? I mean just look at his former girlfriends; Tess, Lois, both stunning and glamorous. She knew that she had some good qualities; she was smart and loyal, but was that enough? He would rather have her? There was no way! That kind of thing only happened in the movies. She had always felt like Betty, the girl in those old comic books she had seen once at the coffee shop. All the guys chased after Veronica, while Betty only occasionally got their attention. She was more like the "good friend." And just when it looked like maybe, she might get a chance with one of them, it seemed like they always went back to Veronica. Damn! It was the story of her life. She was even blond like Betty. Weren't they supposed to have more fun? Not when there were exotic looking brunettes running around. Lana instantly came to her mind. Great; I just can't win, she thought. Yet, Oliver had a way of making her feel beautiful. Was she? Could he really care for her in that way? I mean after all, he had forgiven her when he found out she had taken money from his company; one of those blurred ethical lines she had crossed. Her mind was completely drowning in confusion and doubt.

But eventually she started to see things in a different light. Tess had entered into the Watchtower and set off the elaborate security system. As they sat there, trapped inside, taking stock of her life, she realized that she had been pushing Oliver away, before he could do that to her. Beat him to the punch, or so she thought. But surprisingly, Tess got her to see that Oliver wasn't going anywhere. With her he had a purpose, she had said. Was that possible? Everything seemed right, so perfect when they were together. And it wasn't just the intimacy. They really had a deep bond. They both knew they had a higher calling on this earth, but was there a place in all of that for them to find happiness together? She was willing to fight against evil in this world. Was she willing to fight for a life of happiness for herself? She was beginning to think maybe she could.

And she was becoming more and more confident of it, the night Oliver lay in the hospital bed after receiving burns on his chest from his fight with Zod. As he slept and she gazed down at him, her hand resting on his cheek, she couldn't help but think that all the fear and pain she had in her heart worrying about it being broken, was nothing compared to how it felt at the thought of losing him. That would make her heart shatter beyond repair.

So she tried to open the door of her heart wider to let him in, especially now more than ever because this involved more than just the two of them. Chloe had just recently found out that she was pregnant. Still in shock over seeing the blue line appear on the strip, she tried to wrap her mind around it, but couldn't. How could this have happened? Well, she knew how it had happened, but, she was still unsure of Oliver's exact feelings for her. If she told him she was pregnant, would he feel obligated to be with her, or did he really want to be? She didn't want to trap him. She tried to push all these thoughts aside, because right now they were preparing for battle against Zod and the Kandorians, and that needed all her attention right now.

But sometimes she fell into old habits of letting fear be the guide of her. She regretted it immediately the moment the words came out of her mouth, when Oliver had told her if a war was imminent, he wanted to be with her. Genuinely caught off guard by that fact, she said something about them needing to protect their database. Damn! How could she be so stupid? This was not going to work if she was going to give a relationship with him a try. She couldn't keep doing that, pushing him away. Besides, he deserved honesty from her. He deserved to know about the baby. He was the father after all. She promised herself if they survived this battle with the Kandorians, she would find the right moment to tell him; tell him everything: about the baby, and about the fact that she loved him more than life itself. It was true. She finally was ready to admit what her fragile heart already knew, but what her mind was slow to grasp. She loved him. Chloe Sullivan loved Oliver Queen with her whole messed-up, heart. If he would have her, she would give him all of herself, not just her body, but the whole package. And if didn't want her, well, she didn't even want to think about that She would just have to cross that bridge when she got to it. That was all she could do.

Now together at the tower, they were in communication with their team, all of them assembled and ready for combat. Suddenly they lost their satellite connection, and she, with her hormones raging, started to panic. Because they lost contact with them, she felt like she was leaving them vulnerable against an attack by Zod and his army. Oliver was being very patient with her, trying to calm her down and when he told her that he had purchased an orbiter dedicated to Watchtower, she was speechless. It was the perfect gift, better than jewelry, she thought. He was definitely going to make exchanging gifts in the future very difficult! He told her he still had to hook up the transponders to get the satellite on-line. She was worried about him being out in the open and told him to keep a low profile. Catching her a bit off guard, he leaned down to kiss her. Green Arrow kissed her, Watchtower. She literally swooned like they did in books or movies. Man, he was good at that! She wanted to stand there kissing him forever. But that higher calling of theirs was beckoning, and they both knew it, so Oliver left to hook up the satellite. When he got to the earth station, they stayed in touch by two-way radios. He made the connections and got the video feed running. She looked at the schematics of the station to find a way to guide him out of there and get him back to her sooner. She really needed and wanted him by her side. That was when all hell broke loose!

Suddenly, there were alarms going off from the monitor as a swarm of sensors appeared indicating Oliver was no longer alone. She told him to get out of there fast! He told her that he didn't want these invaders to trace her through the radio frequency. He had to get off it. "No, Ollie!" she yelled. She couldn't bear losing her only link with him. Then the most unexpected yet wonderful words came through the airwaves. He told her he loved her! He loved her! Then she told him what she had wanted to say for a long time now, but had been too scared to – that she loved him. And she meant it. She wanted to say a million more things, but there was no more time. He managed to yell out that whoever was after him, they weren't Kandorian, and then the line went dead. As she stood there, still clutching the radio, she thought that a part of her too, like that radio in her hand, had just died as well.

Now, sitting in the chair, trying to gather her thoughts about her, waiting to hear back from the team, she made a silent promise to herself. She would do whatever it took, use everything in her power, and carry out whatever was necessary to find Oliver, to get him back to her, back where he belonged, however long that would take. This was what she was good at. This was what she was meant to do. This was why she was Watchtower. She would not stop until she once again had him safely back in her arms, her heart, and her life. She would do this for him, for her, and most of all for their baby.