Since Megamind is the city's number one supervillain, rumors about him broke out now and again, circulated, and then died until the next rumor came up again. Very rarely, some of these rumors had truths in them because they had been started by a civilian who had seen Megamind in the middle of one of his schemes. For the most part, however, the rumors were false and started by people with nothing better to do.
When Megamind first declared himself the supervillain of Metro City, he paid attention to these rumors all the time, wanting to know what the general population thought about him. Along with his own, he paid attention to Metro Man's as well. Since he was Metro Man's arch-nemesis, Megamind needed to know what people thought about him too. Eventually, with the help of Minion's advice, he realized that these rumors had become too big of an influence in his life. He was younger then and he tried too much to live up to the rumors he liked, and did everything he could to quash the ones he didn't. So Megamind stopped listening to these rumors and shifted his focus entirely back to his evil deeds.
Well, all of them except for the rumors about Metro Man concerning his relationship with one Roxanne Ritchi… but that was something Minion didn't need to know.
Now if Megamind didn't know what his rumors were, he didn't care. And if he did happen to catch wind of the new rumors, he disregarded them or got a good laugh out of them. One winter a few years ago, there was a rumor spreading that Megamind was going to reenact How the Grinch Stole Christmas and steal everybody's Christmas presents. It was physically impossible for him to sneak into everybody's homes and steal their presents all in one night; and even if he could, he didn't see any point in it. What would he even do with all that stuff? And yet, there were people on TV recommending all sorts of crazy methods for people to implement in their homes to ensure Megamind couldn't steal their children's expensive new toys. He expected people to be generally smarter than that, but Megamind learned something new that holiday season. That particular rumor gave Minion and him about a month's worth of entertainment and by far it was their favorite one.
His current evil plan involved kidnapping Roxanne Ritchi again in order to draw in and capture Metro Man. With this plan, he was going to have the Brain Bots do most of the dirty work. He had changed their design and entered a new algorithm into their system so they could move together with more efficiently. This was necessary in order for the plan to work. He had tested it over and over again with little to no problems; Megamind just hoped it would actually work. Metro Man would definitely put up more of a fight than a few captured civilians…
The theme of kidnapping Roxanne – and people in general - was a relatively new one. He had started kidnapping for about six months now, but when he realized he could use Roxanne to get to Metro Man, she had become his primary focus. This was the fifth time he'd ever done it and he was still getting the whole thing down.
"Sir?" Minion asked. Roxanne was slung over his shoulder, passed out and with a bag placed over her head.
"Yes, Minion?" Megamind said. "What is it?"
They had just arrived at an old warehouse where they would be capturing Metro Man. Minion delicately lifted Roxanne from his shoulder and settled her into a chair, where he began tying her to it. He tugged the bag off her head and tossed it aside.
"I've noticed we've kidnapped Miss Ritchi several times over the past few months to get to Metro Man, but…"
"But what, Minion?" Megamind said, not looking up from a blueprint he was reading.
Minion fumbled with the rope a little. "Why do we only ever kidnap her? We know the identities of some of Metro Man's friends, and we know he is the son of the Scott family, so…"
"So what, Minion?" Megamind asked, irritated that Minion made him put the paper down for this silly conversation.
Minion stiffened. "So… Wouldn't it be more effective to kidnap one of his parents? He has known them all his life. And if we don't start mixing things up, Roxanne might get protection for herself so we won't be able to take her as easily as before."
"Psssh, Minion." Megamind waved his hand dismissively. "Roxanne is all we need."
"But, sir,"
"What, Minion?"
Minion huffed. "I really think you should consider it."
"I don't need to consider it. Roxanne is all we need," he repeated.
"Why?"
"Because – because Metro Man is dating Roxanne! Since they are dating, that means Metro Man will do anything to get back – " Megamind paused for a moment. His voice lost some of its gusto. "…Get back the woman he loves."
"But – "
"But, but, but," Megamind mocked his companion. "I'm tired of this conversation Minion, just finish tying her up. I'm overlooking some schematics for the Brain Bots here." Megamind turned around and went back to reading.
"He's not even dating Roxanne Ritchi," Minion mumbled.
"What was that?" Megamind asked.
"Nothing, nothing. There, I'm done tying her up." Minion stood up from kneeling next to the chair and walked over to Megamind. "She should be waking up any moment now."
"Good, then she'll be waking up around the time I finish looking over this. Perfect."
Megamind called a Brain Bot over and compared it to the diagram in his hand, making changes on the page here and there, sometimes sending that Brain Bot away and calling over a new one for further analysis.
Just like Minion said, Roxanne woke up minutes later. Blinking her eyes, she slowly began gathering awareness of her surroundings. Her vision cleared up and her eyes finally settled on Megamind and Minion. She groaned.
"This again?" she asked. "Can't you guys kidnap some other person?"
"That's what I've been saying – "
"Shush, Minion!" Megamind interrupted, shooting a glare at the fish. He turned his attention back to the woman attached to the chair and crossed the room, stopping just a few feet in front of her. "Oh, Miss Roxanne Ritchi. You have no idea what we have in store for Metro Man today."
"Oh, I think I do."
Megamind's haughty smile disappeared almost instantly. "Wh – what?"
"Go ahead, do it." Roxanne said.
"Do… what?" he looked back at Minion, giving him a confused glance. Minion made a face in reply. He was just as confused as Megamind was.
"I have nothing to hide. Just do it." She leaned back in her chair and looked at him like she expected him to start juggling for her.
"What in the world are you talking about?"
Roxanne looked annoyed and confused, stammering: "You… the… the mind reading thing!"
"What?" Minion and he said in unison.
"You can read minds! Don't pretend that you can't. You're going to read my mind and try to get any secrets about Metro Man that you can from me." She saw that her words were making no more sense to the two villains, who were giving her vacant stares. "…Right?"
"Miss Ritchi, I…" Megamind stopped his thought, and suddenly he began giggling. Giggling. It wasn't even an evil chuckle, it was a genuine laugh. And he couldn't seem to stop.
Roxanne confusedly shifted her gaze from the evil mastermind overcome by fits of laughter to Minion, who was also having a good laugh. Their laughing went on for another minute or so before she began to get annoyed by it.
"Hey!" The laughter didn't falter. "Hey!"
"Ohhh," Megamind wiped a tear from his eye. "Oh, Miss Ritchi. That is, without a doubt, the funniest thing I've heard all week." He expected to see a smile on her face because her joke worked out so well, but her expression was completely serious, and a little annoyed.
"You – you're serious?" Megamind still had a smile on his face. "You think I can read minds!"
He and Minion exchanged glances again. Minion was still letting out small bursts of laughter as he tried to recover.
"She thinks I can read minds, Minion!"
"That is definitely one of the better stories I've heard," Minion said, amused.
Megamind put his hand to his chest in mock surprise. "Roxanne Ritchi, I am shocked to hear that a reporter such as yourself would believe rumors instead of concrete facts about someone."
"I feel so stupid right now…" Roxanne said quietly, shaking her head.
"Who told you this? I'm genuinely curious."
"Um, well… Metro Man did."
"Metro Man?" Megamind and Minion asked in unison again.
"Yes, well… Someone said that you threatened them with your mind reading powers. I guess Metro Man believed it because he got that information from his parents, and his father is a close friend of that individual," Roxanne shook her head again. "I should never have believed it, but since Metro Man told me, I thought it was true."
"Now that is priceless," Minion said.
Megamind nodded at Minion's remark. "I'm almost hurt that Metro Man believed such a thing. I mean, we went to shool together and we've fought so many battles, and in all that time I've never read anybody's mind. Wouldn't you think I'd be using this power for ages now, if I had it?"
"Okay, Megamind, I get it. So what was your evil plan for today, then?" Roxanne asked.
"Oh," Megamind said nonchalantly. "I was just going to have the Brain Bots capture Metro Man and keep him in a dungeon I built specially for him until I found a way to destroy him."
Unimpressed, Roxanne replied: "Uh-huh."
Megamind narrowed his eyes. "What was that supposed to mean?"
"The 'uh-huh'?" Roxanne said.
"Yes, the 'uh-huh'! You don't think my plan will work!"
"Going by your track record when it comes to going against Metro Man, I would say no. I don't think so." Roxanne craned her neck to look over Megamind's shoulder and beyond Minion. "Also the fact that Metro Man just found the location of this warehouse you took me to and he's punching through your Brain Bots like they're nothing."
Megamind's eyes almost bulged out of his sockets. He and Minion whirled around and sure enough, Metro Man was flying around the entrance to the warehouse, creating a graveyard of destroyed, sparking Brain Bots underneath him. He was outnumbered a hundred to one, yet the poor robots made the minutest impact on the white-clad superhero. Some clung onto his back or ankles in an attempt to overpower him, but he easily ripped them off his person and crushed them in his fists. The only reason he hadn't already gotten to beating Megamind was because there were so many of the things holding him back.
"There goes that plan," Megamind said to himself, watching helplessly as his Brain Bots were torn to pieces. He didn't even care that Metro Man was destroying so many of his creation, he had a machine programmed that could easily crank out as many Brain Bots as he liked, so that wasn't a problem. It was the fact that it was so easy for Metro Man to fend off the Brain Bots. His plan had been crushed into dust.
"Um, sir, Plan B?" Minion said. Megamind continued watching the scene before him, clearly not paying attention to Minion at all.
"Sir," Minion repeated with more urgency.
Megamind gave Minion a weak smile. "Yes, Plan B, about that…"
Minion's eyes went half-lidded. "There was no Plan B, was there?" he said flatly.
Megamind made a nod of his head at Minion as confirmation. Minion sighed.
"Man," Roxanne piped up. "Now I wish the mind reading thing was real. It'd be less pathetic than this."
Neither of the two said anything, they had gone back to watching the battle that was almost over. Only about a half dozen Brain Bots remained, and they were quickly falling to the floor upon contact with the superhero's fists. Metro Man was the clear victor today, no doubt about that.
"If you guys are going back to jail can you at least untie me? I'm getting rope burn over here." Roxanne said.
"Yeah," the villains responded and kneeled down to undo her bonds.
Roxanne rubbed her wrists where the rope had been chafing against her skin. "Next time, Minion, lighten up on the knots."
Just as Roxanne had been freed, Metro Man fended off all of Megamind's Brain Bots and flew over to the other end of the warehouse where Megamind, Minion and Roxanne were gathered. His fists were clenched like he was prepared for another fight, but they unfolded and his expression softened when he saw Roxanne was no longer tied to the chair.
"You let her go?" Metro Man asked, his brow furrowed.
"Well, yes, of course. It was all part of my plan!" Megamind said with his chest puffed out.
"No it wasn't," Roxanne said. Megamind ignored her.
"And now, I'm going to read your mind and learn all of your weaknesses!" Megamind said, raising a finger to his temple.
Roxanne rolled her eyes. "He was going to surrender, Metro Man. He can't read minds."
Megamind shot a look at Roxanne. "Can't you just let me have this?"
"No," she said teasingly.
Metro Man shook his head. "Wait, wait, wait. Slow down. He can't read minds?"
Roxanne shook her head.
Metro Man touched his fingers to his forehead, sighing. "Alright, well, I feel like a complete idiot right now."
Roxanne crossed her arms. "That makes two of us."
"Are we still going to jail?" Megamind asked with a weak smile, hoping Metro Man would say no.
Metro Man quirked his eyebrow at the question. Everyone in the room could almost hear 'well, duh' the superhero was almost certainly thinking. "You sent your robots to attack me and you kidnapped Roxanne."
Megamind's smile faded. "Well, this was fun while it lasted."
Metro Man saw the rope lying on the floor that had been used to tie up Roxanne and grabbed it. Using his super speed, he tied up Megamind and Minion's hands behind their backs so they couldn't try anything while he was flying them back to the prison.
"Roxy, I can come back here and fly you home once I'm done dealing with these two," Metro Man said.
"No thanks, I'm good. I'll get a taxi." She looked over at the two villains. "Have fun in prison, Megamind. And when you break out again please stop kidnapping me. I've got a job and a life too, you know."
"No promises," he said.
"…Right." It was pretty much the answer she expected, though it was worth a try.
