Don't blame me for this at all, my friend begged me to write this...blame her. It's based off of two Livejournal icons we've seen in the Harry Potter related communities...If you've seen them then you'll catch the references immediately. This is a one-shot drabble, meant completely in humor. Reviews are always appreciated!
Severus Snape stalked up the spiraling staircase, many thoughts running through his head. He had just returned from the strangest Death Eater meeting in his life. Voldemort had ranted about the usual things like Scarhead, the Order, Scarhead, the blood traitors, Scarhead, and the new mission. Then the most peculiar thing had happened, he declared every Friday to be Pajama Night, and ripped his outer robes of. Severus grimaced outwardly at the memory.
The Dark Lord was wearing this frilly pink teddie, and nothing else. Severus had been handed a bright green corset and matching thong and he stared at the items in horror. Lucius Malfoy had changed into his bright red thong and was already bumping hips with Bellatrix in a bizarre dance. The Dark Lord said next Friday they were to all meet wearing these items instead of their robes, and dismissed them.
How the bloody hell am I going to explain THAT to the old man? Severus wondered to himself as he knocked on the Headmaster's door. It swung open and Severus stalked inside. He sat down at his usual chair and waited for Dumbledore to enter the room. He snuck a lemon sherbet from the glass bowl and popped it in his mouth quickly.
That's when Dumbledore walked in, to Severus' horror, as naked as the day he was born. Severus' mouth dropped in shock, the lemon sherbet falling to the floor.
"S-sir?" he stammered.
"Severus, my boy! I was just looking for you my boy. I have to discuss something very serious with you." He said cheerfully and sat behind his desk, still naked.
Severus merely stared, his brain melting and his mouth trying to close.
"My dear boy, there have been thieves on the grounds! They've been stealing my stash. And as you know, it's very hard to be groovy without your stash!"
Severus blinked, "Your stash, Sir?"
Dumbledore nodded, and that's when Severus saw the beads he had braided into his beard. Bright pinks, greens, yellows, and oranges screamed at him from the white hair. Severus stared on in horror, unable to understand what deity hated him so.
"Yes! I was just getting ready to enjoy a nice pipe of hash, and discovered it missing. I suggest you patrol the hallways immediately!" Dumbledore stood and pointed to the door.
"But, Sir, I had important-"
"Go!" Dumbledore screamed.
Severus scrambled out of the office and ran down the moving staircase. His mind was still reeling from the shock of all that his poor eyes had seen. He turned down several hallways then ran into the back of someone with a grunt. He looked down and saw Harry Potter's mortified face. Harry opened his mouth to speak, but Snape silenced him with a motion of his hand.
"No, whatever insane thing you're about to say, I don't want to know. I'm going to bed, Potter, I cannot handle anymore tonight. After Voldemort in a frilly teddie and a naked Dumbledore, I wish to soak my eyes in bleach to forget this all. Fifty points from Griffindor for being out so late. Get to bed."
Harry stared at the retreating form in astonishment before grabbing the stash he had taken from Dumbledore and running full speed back to the common room.
