Long Way to Happy
By: Sk8ter Girl 13
Disclaimer: I own nothing but the plot, oc's, and the attitudes. Enjoy and feel free to let me know what you think. The song is " Long Way to Happy" by Pink.
I sat at the forest edge thinking about Sam. I thought back to all the heppiness and all the pain. I thought that maybe now I could move on. I looked out at the ocean thinking about everything then I started to sing.
"One night to you
Lasted six weeks for me
Just a bitter little pill
Just to try to go to sleep
No more waking up to innocence
Say hellp to hesitance
To everyone I meet
Thanks to you years ago
I guess I'll never know
What love means to me but oh
I'll keep on rolling down this road
But I've got a bad, bad feeling"
I remembered the first night Sam left me for Emily. It felt like six weeks, just laying in bed at night. Finally I took a pill to help me get to sleep. I always woke up without the innocence my family was used to. The innocence Sam took from me. Whenever I would hang out with someone I was always hesitant. I didn't want them to break me. I guess I'll never know what love means to me, thanks a lot Sam.
" It's gonna take a long time to love
It's gonna take alot to hold on
It's gonna be a long way to happy, yeah
Left in the pieces you broke me into
Town apart but now I've got to
Keep on rolling like a stone
Cause it's gonna be a long, long way to happy"
It's been like four years and I'm just barely starting to love again. It takes everything in my power to hold on and not break down. Honestly, everyone knows Sam broke me inot pieces, he left me torn and rolling like a stone. It's going to be a long, long way to happy.
" Left my childhood behind
In a roll away bed
Everything was so damn simple
Now I'm losing my head
Trying to cover up the damage
And pad out all the bruises
Didn't know I had it
So it didn't hurt to lose it
Didn't hurt to lose it
No but ot
I'll keep on rolling down this road
But I've got a bad, bad feeling"
It's true, after Sam and I broke up, I pushed my childhood down a hill on a rool away bed. Everytime I thought about it, memories of what we used to be filled my head. Everything used to be so simple, easy, nothing could break you, now I'm losing my head. It's driving me crazy. I'm trying to cover up the damage, and hind the bruises on my heart. I hide it all behind a mask that no one can crack. With a little help, it won't hurt to lose it all.
" It's gonna take a long time to love
It's gonna take a lot to hold on
It's gonna be a long way to happy, yeah
Left in the pieces you broke me into
Torn apart but now I've got to
Keep on rolling like a stone
Cause it's gonna be a long, long way to happy"
I know for sure it's gonna take a while to love . It's taken everything in me to hold on, not break down. It's not easy when your in pieces, torn at the seam, and dont' want anybody to help. It's gonna be a long, long way to happy
" Now I'm numb as hell and I can't feel a thing
But don't worry about regret or guilt cause I
Never knew your name
I just want to thank you
Thank you
From the bottom of my heart
For all the sleepless nights
And the tearing me apart yeah, yeah"
Now I'm numb and can't feel a thing. And the reason is because I learned how to block out everyone's thoughts. I can't hear them, they can't hear me. I 'm sick of Sam feeling regret and guilt. What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger. That is the truth. I've told him to quit, but he won't listen. I understand, he couldn't control falling for Emily, I get that. I just need to thank him, from the bottom of my cold, dead heart. He didn't kill me, but he did make me stronger, even if it's tearing me apart.
" It's gonna take a long time to love
It's gonna take a lot to hold on
It's gonna be a long way to happy, yeah
Left in the pieces that you broke me into
Torn apart but now I've got to
Keep on rolling like a stone
Cause it's gonna be a long, long way to happy"
It's gonnatake a while, but I'll love. It's taken everything to just hold on, and not break down. I'm in pieces and torn at the seams. But I'll keep on rolling down the path I choose, just like a stone.
" It's gonna take a long time to love
It's gonna take a lot to hold on
It's gonna be a long way to happy, yeah
Left in the pieces that youbroke me into
Torn apart but now I've got to
Keep on rolling like a stone
Cause it's gonna be a long, long way ot happy"
It's gonna take a while to love. It's taken everything to hold on, even if I'm torn at the seams, I'm not gonna break anytime soon. i might be willing to love sonner then I thought. I realized a couple of days ago that, I might just actually love Jacob, because I imprinted on him. But who knows what will happen, especially with his little Nessie.
I heard a twig snap and whipped my head around to come face to face with Jacob.
" God Jacob! You nearly gave me a heart attack." I snapped at him. He chuckled at my response and plopped down right next me.
" You shouldn't be daydreaming in the middle of the forest then." he told me lightly. I ignored him for as long as I could. Tehn he asked me a question.
" That song you were singing, who was it about?" he asked. I looked away to hide my blush.
" Sam and my feelings. I think... I think I might finally be able to get over him. But I also think I fell for some one else." I told him. He smiled at me.
" Who is the lucky guy?" he asked, a teasing sound in his voice. I shook my head.
" Nope. I ain't tellin' you." I told him. He pouted at that and I laughed.
" How about a clue to who he is?" he aksed, a hopeful tone in his voice. I thought about it for a minute.
" Alright. He's always been there for Seth, no matter what." I told him. He was thinking about it for a couple of minutes.
" Sam? No, you just said you're over him. Embry?" he asked. I snorted.
" Heck no." I told him. He thought again.
" Paul, Jarred, Quil?" he tried again.
" Heck no, heck no, and no." I answered in order. He thought a little bit more.
" Brady, Collin?" he asked.
" To young. They're like Seth's age." I replied.
" That only leaves Seth and me." he replied. Then it dawned on him.
" Me?" he asked unsure. I stood up and walked to sit in front of him. I kneeled down and looked him in the eye. Then I took a deep breath, preparing to tell him.
" Jake, a couple of days ago I imprinted. I... imprinted on you." I told him, looking away. I looked at his face and searched it. He leaned forward and wrapped his arms around me. I fell into his chest, enjoying the warmth that was burning into me, even though we were both the same temperature.
" J- j- jake?" I asked. I cursed myself for stuttering. Leah Clearwater does not stutter. He leaned forward and kissed me lightly.
" So how long till happy?" he asked me, a small smile on his lips. I smiled, a real smile. Something I haven't done since Sam, years ago.
" I'm already there." I told and kissed him more fiercely then before. I heard him chuckle before relaxing.
