Chapter 1: Coming Back

Olivia Benson, Sergeant of SVU, had just endured the trial that was seriously the hardest she had to endure. Barca had even asked her to Let William Lewis, a man who beat, burned, attempted rape, forced fed alcohol, and made her watch him as he tortured the Mayers, get 25 to life, and say that he raped her. She wouldn't let Barba do that, and now, after he was declared that he would spend more time in prison, she was just wishing the she had. She had let him misname her in front of peers, her boyfriend, and others to prove that what she had done under duress at the time when Lewis had her was seriously excessive force. He had tarnished her name as a cop, and tarnished her name as a person. Now, the trial was over, and she watched as he was led out of the courtroom with a conniving smile on his face.

"Hey Liv, you coming?", Brian Cassidy, her boyfriend at the time, asked her. The others attached as she stood there watching Lewis leave.

"Yes, uh, just give me a few minutes please.", she said, and he nodded. She sat down on the pew and shook her head many times trying to not let the memory of Lewis and what he had done to her. She got up and walked out of the room and walked to the nearest staircase. She went down to the last few steps and sat down, running her hands through her hair. Then, she let it all out. The tears came strolling down her face. She hung on to the bar on the railing of the stairs and cried. She let everything she was feeling out.

Elliot Stabler, a man who used to work at SVU and who had heard about the date of the trial through Fin, a fellow detective of Olivia's and as far as she knew, one of the best. He cutely went and sat in the pew at the very back, knowing that he needed to see the man who tortured his girl be put away. But she wasn't really his girl, but he was going to do everything in his power to get her back and to get the life back that he wants and that she deserves. He saw her with Brian when she left the courtroom and things were tense. He knew that this trial and this case had put a strain on their relationship. Like all men, he knew that whoever Olivia got close to, was going to run because he was very sure that he knew Olivia, better than anyone. He had followed her a few minutes after she went into the staircase and stood at the top for a while, knowing the strain that seeing him would put on her. But when she broke, he couldn't help it. He went down the stairs, and hoped that she would just let him be there for her.

She heard someone coming down the stairs, and Olivia pulled herself together. She was supposed to be the strong one. She had thought that she was going to see either Fin, Nick, or even Brian come next to her. But when she saw the man sitting there, with her, she was shocked.

"El? What are you doing here? What? Wanted to come see me break again?", she said, and she stormed up the stairs. Elliot followed her and tried to get her to talk to him.

"No, Liv, No, I knew what day was today. But I needed to see you. I need to talk to you.", Elliot had said.

"What now? You leave me alone for three years and now you decide that it's best that you come and see me, just when I am at my weakest because of Lewis and his trial?", Olivia asked, rather harshly.

Before he could answer, she slapped him. "You were supposed to be there for me! You said that we were partners for better and for worse and yet you left! How dare you!", Liv continued.

"Olivia, I deserve that and more. We need to sit down and talk somewhere and then I'll explain" Elliot said. "Not now, I need to think.", Olivia said, and left. She saw Brian and her team outside and was taken aback. They had waited for her and she grinned.

"Hey guys, thanks for being here today, it meant a lot.", Liv said, and Brian took her hand. She turned and kissed him.

"Liv, you're shaking? Are you okay?", Brian asked, holding her closer.

"I - Bri —- what he said—-", she stopped, and looked up at him.

"He was trying his best to get off, honey, so what he said, it was all self defense, because of how he had you. Honey, please, it's okay, relax.", Brian said. His words didn't dull the thoughts in her mind.

"Yea, Liv, we know what happened, yet, he refuses to see that he tortured you. I would have done the same thing.", Amanda said, and Fin nodded.

"But they could imprison me.", Liv stated.

"They'd have to go through us first. We aren't getting rid of you.", Nick said.

"Liv, we got ya back.", Fin said, and she hugged each one of them, something she knew rarely happened but she needed to feel that they were behind her.

"Thanks guys, I wanna go, Bri, I need to go home.", Olivia said, and Brian nodded. They all went back to the precinct and sat there thinking about everything. Liv and Brian went home. Liv was sitting there on her couch motionless, just lost in thought. Brian wanted to get her mind off things, so he held her close and rubbed her back.

"Bri - I— need some time.", she said, and moved away from him. He knew that she was still healing, but ever since the first attak, things were different.

"Geez, Liv, you won't let me even confront you. Why is it going to take for us to get back to where we were before Lewis?", Brian asked, standing up.

"Brian, I just need time. I am ashamed at what I've been through. It's hard on me.", Liv cried.

"I know, and I just don't think that you love me the way that I love you.", Brian breathed and said.

"Brian I love and always will, but I just need time to heal. It's been a long day.", Olivia said.

"Olivia, really? I've been there for you and over time you have pushed me away. I feel like I can't help you right now. Maybe time apart will bring us back together and maybe it won't. I'm saying I need a break.", Brian said.

"You need a break? Brian, I am not chaining you here. I am not keeping you here. These past few months have been the hardest of my life and overtime I needed you, you weren't there. You were off working, and then when you come home, you wanna go and screw off with me, and believe me, right now, that's not what I need. You haven't once catered to my needs. All you care about is yourself. Well, that's not gonna happen anymore. I'd appreciate it, if you pack and leave because I can't take it!", Liv said, crying.

Then, he walked out of the room, grabbed his bags nd left. She was shocked that he actually left and sat there and cried for what could've been and what she'd been through. Just then, a knock on the door came as a surprise and she thought that it was Brian, saying he forgot something.

"Brian, what? What have you possibly got to say?", Liv screamed. When she opened the door, she inhaled deeply, as Elliot Stabler stood there in her hallway of the apartment.

"Oh, what now? You come to break me down even further. Listen, El, I don't need this right now.", Olivia said, almost slamming the door shut and walking away, but Elliot , being a persistent man, opened the door and walked in.

"Get out! You don't belong here! You belong with Kathy! Remember, your wife and kids! Please just go!", Liv screamed.

"No, Liv, I can't leave, because you need me. You've always needed me, and I was too blind too see it. You need me.", Elliot stated, and Liv ran into his arms and held him close. She don't know why she had done that, but it felt perfectly right.

"Liv, you're safe now. Whatever you're feeling, let it out.", Elliot said, and kissed her head.

"El, why are you here?", Olivia said through tears. He took her face in his hands and made her look at him. When she did, he continued.

"It's because I knew that this was the right place to be. You need me, and guess what, I need you. Kathy is over. We divorced last year. We fought all the time. We parted and I still see the kids when ever I wanted, but they knew that you were my number one. Kathy knew it too. She blocked all of your calls that came to me. Liv, she did everything to keep me there. But my heart wasn't there. It was you. It was always you. I took a flight from Connecticut where were staying with her family, and came here to see you. When I got here, I saw that he had you, and…", Elliot cut off and backed away.

"And what, you didn't want to see me as broken? Are you ashamed of me?", she said.

"No, no, no, I am never ashamed of you. Olivia believe me, all I wanted to do was find you. Fin kept tabs with me, and he told me that they had found you. Liv, I wanted to come and see you in the hospital, but, you were with Brian and I felt like you needed to be with him. So, I went back to my apartment and began finding work. But I couldn't get you out of my head. I read every article I could about you. I know that sounds crazy, but I couldn't stop. Then, Fin texted me with dates for the trial. I was there, in the back the entire time. I wanted to run up there and kill him when he questioned you. God, I would've done anything for you.", Elliot stated. He sat her down on the sofa and kneeled in front of her.

"Why did you leave?", Liv asked. Elliot took a breath and stood up pacing.

"Kathy gave me an ultimatum. My job or my kids. She even had pictures of us together and said that I had to choose. I couldn't make that decision on my own, so I consulted Don, and he said that the best thing to do ws to be there for my children. So I left, but believe me, I couldn't stand it. I wish I could've talked to you, but I know you would have told me to go with my kids. So, I did it. I put in my papers."

"I understand El, but why not trust me? Did twelve years of partnership mean nothing to you?", Liv asked.

"It meant the world to me that I was Olivia Benson's partner. But Kathy was demanding and it was harder on me because the kids were needing me in so many ways. Then,came the day when I sat Jenna. After I shot her, I was feeling the guilt and pain and ran. I knew you disapproved of me killing Jenna and so I left.", Elliot stated.

"El, you really think that I am mad at you for killing Jenna? You saved lives that day. You saved me. You are nothing short of a her, trust me, the board would've understood. We could've fought it". Liv stated. She stood up and walked towards him.

"El, the past doesn't matter. All that matters is right now, you are here and proclaiming to me that you are there for me. Brian never was. He was too concerned with himself. You are here for me. That's all I need after a day like today.", Liv stated and he turned around and kissed her. She kissed him back and held on to him.

"God I know that you probably don't want to here this right now, but I am in love with you. If you'll have me, I would like to come back in your life.", Elliot stated. Olivia smiled.

"Of course, El, I love you to. I always have, I just never had the guts to tell you. Although we never said it, I always felt it. But then, you went back to Kathy so many times, and I…", Liv said, looking away.

"No, Liv, I wanted you then and I want you now. I went back for my family. I never went back for her.", Elliot said, and Liv turned around.

"Elliot, I love you. I love you so much.", she said, and he went over to her and kissed her. She kissed him with every fiber in her being. Just then, she heard a knock on the door.

"Liv, I forgot my computer. Can I come in and get it?", Liv heard Brian say.

"Hang on Brian. (to Elliot) Go and wait in the bedroom. Let me take care of this, and then I'll meet you in there." Liv said, and Elliot kissed her and Liv felt that kiss down to her core. Then she remembered the her ex was waiting outside.

"Liv, look I am sooo sorry. I didn't mean for things to get ugly. Please just let me stay the night and we can talk.", Brian said. Elliot stood in the bedroom, listening to Brian's pleading. He wanted to go in there, and kick him to the curb, but then he heard Olivia.

"Talk about what Brian? How you messed up? Well, there's been a lot that I needed you for and you weren't there. Please, take your computer and go.", Liv said, handing him his computer bag.

"But…", Brian said, but the door slammed in his face. Brian then left knowing it was no use. Liv stood there, gathering herself for a minute. She didn't know that this would be like this, but she didn't know that she had a man in her bedroom, that was waiting for her and that loved her very much. She turned out the lights and locked the door. Then, she went to the bedroom and Elliot sat there on the bed waiting for her.

"Sorry, where were we?", Liv said.

"Honey, listen, I know that things are different now. But if you wanted to be with Brian or anyone else, please do so, and kick me to the curb. I want you happy, that's all.", Elliot said.

"No, I'm not going to do that. Why? Because I love you. You were always it for me, and Brian was just there. It was something a long time ago, and now that's over. Honey, I want you.", Liv said, kissing Elliot. Elliot knew that she was truthful in her words.

"Liv, I love you.", Elliot said.

"I love you so much, Elliot. Now, make love to me.", Liv said. They made out and undressed each other. When Elliot backed away from her for a second, Liv covered her bruised and burned body.

"El", she looked at him, as tears sprung to his eyes. She saw them, and looked won.

"El, don't look at them. Honey, please, they are hideous.", Olivia begged, crying a bit. Elliot snapped out of his lapse, and looked at Liv, crying trying to grab whatever she could to cover her body.

"No, Liv, don't. Honey, you are beautiful to me. These are beautiful. Tell me, what happened?", He said.

"I - I - thought you knew.", Liv said, crying.

"I know that what Fin told me. That he had you and you got out. But I don't know what he did to you.", Elliot said, holding her close. He traced her scars that she had on her lip, forehead and then the burns on her chest.

"El, please, don't look at them.", Liv cried, holding on to him.

"Liv, they are beautiful because it shows me that you are here with me now. Lewis didn't win.", Elliot said, and Liv took a breath.

"I am here baby, now let's get this over with. First, he burned me. He knocked me out so many times with the bottle and then the gun. When I came to, I had burns on my chest, stomach and right above my… my… center. He put my badge there. My badge, the one thing that kept me safe throughout all these years. Then, he burned my keys, and the wire hangers on my stomach and my chest is where he cigarette burned me. He burned my head to, but I was so out of it, I didn't feel that. Oh God, El, he tortured me. He tied me up in the car and then forced more alcohol down my throat, and no water. I couldn't think straight. El, I'm sorry, he overpowered me. Please don't be mad.", Liv cried, and held on to him tighter.

Elliot sat next to her and held her close. When she gripped on tighter, he did too. "Liv, honey, I am not mad. I am so grateful that you survived. God, I thought he was going to kill you.", Elliot said, crying.

"He had a gun on me when he told me to beg for my life. I had too. I thought about you and what you would've done and then I got stronger. Your strength gave me strength. El, thinking of you, saved me.", Liv said, and kissed him.

"Olivia, I love you. Thank you for being here and accepting everything that I have and have been in the past. I know it'll take a while to get back to us, but I want to try.", Elliot said.

"Elliot, I love you. I love you so much. Honey, you have me forever. You're it for me. You're what I always wanted. Thank you for coming back and finding me.", Liv said, and kissed him. THen, Elliot made love to her and then fell asleep together.