Kankri POV
It was raining. Heavily. Not that I give a damn. I sighed, another failure. Everything I've worked so hard for went down the drain. All those researches and effort I've put into were useless. Today was the day where I give speeches about the different races between humans and us trolls, and how we could get along. But no, no one ever gives a shit or two about what I say. It hurts. It hurts badly when you were accused of being an 'arrogant prick'. A 'useless scumbag', a 'stupid guy who just don't know when to shut up'; I was even cursed to my own death. I too have feelings but everyone thinks that I don't. Was it because I enjoy preaching? Or perhaps the way I look or act? I don't know.
I brought up the stack of papers which were drenched by the rain and stare at the findings I've written. The words are slowly getting smeared, reminding me that I was a failure. The happiness I felt knowing that I'll be speaking to a group of 600, 600 people. I remember preparing the papers, printing worksheets, making slide shows, making sure to get tea snacks for the short breaks. Everything was perfect. I was ready. I even rehearsed what I'm gonna say. However, the moment I enter the lecture hall, my heart sank. Not a single person here. The second thing I've notice was the white board.
Painted with painful words.
'NO ONE WANTS TO HEAR YOUR SISSY PREACH'
'GO BACK TO LIVING UNDER THE BRIDGE'
'USELESS'
'DUMB SCUMBAG'
'ANNOYING PIECE OF SHIT'
Those words, written in caps on the white board, it hurts. I still stayed for a hour or so, just in case someone comes but none. No one came. I had to pack my stuff and leave.
It was depressing. I couldn't take this anymore. How many times have I been accused. Pushed around. No one understands me. I had no one to turn to. No one to listen to how I feel, to my problems. No one to hear me rant, to let out how I feel inside. How many times have I assured myself that everything was going to be okay? Well guess what, I couldn't see it anymore.
I stood on the top edge of the building, taking in the view. The world was beautiful but not by what inhabited it. I smiled melancholy.
Maybe I'm better off dead. My existence here was nothing but a mere shadow. I stared down at the people, trolls, who looked like tiny little ants from my point of view. I could feel the chilly wind blowing softy against my face. Where will I go after this? An endless slumber perhaps. That's nice I guess.
I threw my bag and papers onto the floor, not caring if some were blown away by the wind.
I will free myself from this suffering. At last, I could have some peace. The thing I've longed for, I'm finally getting it. I let out a small chuckle.
Finally this is it.
"Good bye..."
