The pressure was getting to me, one fuck up and I am done.Hands shaking like a bitch but I couldn't help it, one simple fucking task and that's it. Put the medicine into the tube, I've done this before. Hands got so sweaty, I really felt like I was going to get a knife in the back of my head. Ms Joy was right behind me.
I couldn't help it, it slipped out of my hand, it got everywhere. That was so fucking humiliating, another fuck up on something so fucking basic, I just wanted to slam my head against a wall.
"Oh for FUCK SAKE,YOU CAN'T EVEN DO BASIC,GET THE OUT NOW!"
Jeez,I know I fucked up, but you don't have to rub it in.
I felt tears forming but I know she hates that shit so I tried my hardest to prevent myself from crying and left, while walking out I could hear her from like a mile away shouting and cursing.
Welp, that was shit.Another job well done, Whoopie I am such a fucking failure XD.
I just walked home, I wanted to continue working, but last time I did that she punched me in the stomach.Wasn't much to note while walking, the air was cold, the road was clear and I want die.
I took the keys out of my bag, I tried putting it in and turning and as per usual I am soo incompetent that I can not even turn the keys the right way.
Of fucking course I can't.
Going in I just wanted to inhale deeply the smell of musk and shit in my apartment.I just got used to the smell, couldn't give a flying type fuck.I just crawled to bed and cried.Didn't have the motivation to eat or take a piss so I just cried and slept through the day.
Woke up with an erection, whipped out my phone and jacked of to a Lucario getting railed by a Riolu, took a few minutes but i came and cleaned the cum off using the blanket.It was like 9:00pm so I was more active, after taking a piss I messaged my adoptive father online.He's a Sawsbuck living in Route 4.I am not sure how he could even live in the desert but he loves it soo good for him.
He recently hasn't been responding lately and with all the sludgy shit that's been happening in my life I really need him more than ever.
Of course he doesn't respond.Last time I talked to him he was busy with college and recently, during the time i talked to him, met a male gogoat.I was happy for him, but I just really wanna talk and be with him.
I just spent the rest of the day fucking myself with a knotted dildo and really the only thing keeping me alive mentally other than eating.I Feel soo fucking numb towards anything else, playing video games, talking to anyone else other than my adopted father, exercising (Which by the way, that makes me feel soo much like shit, it only reminds me of how fat and retarded I am. That fucking shiet about exercising making you happy is bullshit on my end) So thought the entire night I just put on futas fucking guys and pounded myself away into the night.
