BELLA RESEARCHES SEX
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THIS IS RE-EDITED VERSION OF THE OLD 'STORY' I PUT UP. I wanted to clear some things up, after reading some reviews. (it's march 2015 now)
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I'm writing this because in a lot of fanfic's with lemons and first time sex, they write about an internal barrier in a girl's vagina. They talk about breaching it. That's not right, a myth, which I want to talk about. Do away with.
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This is a one-shot for girls/ women.
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Normal script describes facts, information, advice. A lot came from the internet, sites like wikepedia. Some things are personal, other from television/ movies.
Cursive, bold script is Bella's thoughts. She's a more confidant person than in the books, probably.
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Sometime during Eclipse
I wanted to be more intimate with Edward so badly, but he kept holding back. Of course I understand it's for my safety, but I wonder if there's more to it. Is he insecure about himself, his body? You know, down there.
I decided I knew very little myself about sex, so doing some research seemed wise. Ahem, sure, we had talked about it in school, but still, those were just some basic things. I went online and checked some things out. Oh my goodness, the things you can find! The possibilities. I blushed a lot and hoped Alice didn't see me doing this.
I came across a site with stories they call fanfiction. Some of those I liked a lot and I continued reading the next few days. The ones with 'lemons' made me aroused. (strange they call it that, lemons) And also confused. So I started writing, making notes of more scientific sites. Here are some of them:
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1. A girl has a hymen, well, most do. It's a ring of tissue (membrane) around the entrance of the vagina. (so it's not something half way down!) It's there to stop bacteria and filth coming in.
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2. Every hymen is shaped differently. Sometimes it almost covers the whole opening, others are just a sliver, barely noticeable. The tissue can be thick or thin, tough or flexible. It can tear with sex and bleed, but not necessarily. If it happens, it's because of the friction of the moving penis.
When you've used tampons and masturbated, the hymen might be breached already or stretched. So you don't necessarily have to bleed or feel pain during first time sex.
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3. You can also bleed from inside, because it's too tight of a fit and you're not really ready.
(Vaginal wall tearing; a tiny tear can cause bleeding, because like your scalp it's a sensitive area with heavy bloodsupply)
Angle of penetration is also very important!
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And that's where the myth of an internal barrier comes from I think. Because there is noting IN the vagina, science says so. If it feels like there is something obstructing him, you should stop and consider the following points.
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4. Plenty of foreplay is very, very, very important! Getting fully aroused. It's all about lubrication. Wetter is better!
Also, go slow, let him ease into you and wait for your body to adapt. Further more, foreplay relaxes you. When you're really anxious, your muscles tighten, your vagina can 'clamp shut', making penetration (nearly) impossible. Don't force things! Keep kissing and caressing!
5. A vagina will elongate and expand when a girl is aroused enough and penetrated. The depth of a vagina in a aroused state can vary from 3 to 7.5 inches. Test if you can reach the cervix when you're aroused. It's like the tip of a nose.
When a guy has a big penis, or if a girl isn't fully ready, he can reach the cervix (entrance to the womb). Penetrating it is highly unlikely though, the opening is very small and blocked with mucus. (shouldn't even try!) Hitting it can be uncomfortable, but also painful.
Stop, change positions, don't let him thrust too deep. And again, point 4!
6. Yes, angle of penetration is very important. Do it wrong and he rubs against the vaginal wall too roughly. That can of course be a source of pain and leave you sore (long) after. Bleeding more than a few drops can also come from this. See point 3.
7. It's not normal to feel pain every time after sex. The same goes with bleeding afterwards (a lot). The uterus maybe tilted or you can have an infection. Please visit your doctor for advice.
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It's good to visit your doctor anyway if you're thinking of having sex. Hmm, I might need to make an appointment. Wish mom was here. But first, I need to use the bathroom now, to follow some advice.
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8. Explore your own body first. Know yourself. Discover what feels good to you. Some spots are more sensitive than others. Not every woman has a G-spot, or one you can reach with your finger. Did you know 70% of women need clitoral stimulation to have an orgasm?!
Use a tampon (at least sometimes) and progress to a vibrator, so you can test what penetration will feel like. Also it gives you an idea of the width of your vagina and how easily (or not) it'll stretch. The more often you use your fingers/ vibrator/ or have sex, the easier your body will adapt, probably, to being penetrated.
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Aahh, there's my clit. Wow, it's so sensitive. I'm very wet and rub it gently with my moist finger. Oooh, that feels good, something is building in my stomach. I think of Edward's lovely body and scent. Imagine him doing this. And get my first orgasm. Yes! Wow!
Can I get another? Gently I slide my finger down and into my womanhood. Sliding it out and in again is easy. The G-spot should be on the side of my belly, about 1.5 inch in. I find where it should be, but feel nothing like when I touch my clit. Oh well, maybe I need something else, like a vibrator. How am I going to get one? *Blush, giggle*
I stop and clean myself up. Back to the computer to note some statistics.
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* The younger you are, the tighter you are. (Especially when you're under 17)
* The shape of your hips changes when you mature. Everything changes.
* Average age for first time sex: men; 16.9 years, women; 17.4 years.
* Average penis size (erect); length: 5 to 7 inches, circumference: 4 to 6 inches (around), diameter: 1 to 1,5 inches (?).
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Well, those are interesting. But reading some blogs, people's personal experiences, I also noted these next things.
Emotionally it's wiser to wait until you're older to have sex. (It's not the same as getting your period or anything, it's so intimate) Nature intended it for making babies, you're not ready to be a mother at fourteen, right. Or even 16. Think about it. Your body isn't ready either, at that age. Some research shows that people who lose their virginity past twenty, will have better relationships in life.
Penetration doesn't have to happen to have pleasure. You can play with you hands and mouths, toys. You might even orgasm faster.
The way we experience things also has to do with expectations. When you hear from many people you should bleed having first time sex, you anticipating it. The same goes for feeling pain. So a lot has to do with your mind, what's in your head.
Getting aroused and getting an orgasm also depend on your state of mind. The last one is more linked to your brain than the first. Your body sometimes gets aroused without you thinking of sex consciously. During ovulation for example. Or when you do an activity that causes 'friction'.(horse riding, bicycling)
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I feel I have to agree with the above. For a normal human being I think having sex has consequences. Doing it for the first time shouldn't feel like doing a chore. You have your most private parts exposed to someone. Your bodies are joined. I want it to be special and Edward too. The concept of 'Friends with benefits' sounds strange to me. What if one of them falls in love, with somebody else? How would the other 'friend' feel? You can't continue having sex with that person, right. Without it being like cheating on your 'real' partner. But hey, that's me.
More stuff I want to mention:
When undressing, you see that your male partner is very big, and you know you're not (like, can barely fit two fingers in at once), DON'T DO IT, DON'T HAVE SEX! Because it will surely hurt immensely and you'll regret it. Very traumatic.
Not every size will fit, especially when you haven't had sex before/ much. (Big is not always better!) There are limits to every person's body.
Now, I don't want to sound racial, but size is sometimes linked to it. African men tend to be 'bigger' than Asian, if you get what I mean. So, the bodies of women from the same area could be genetically adapted to deal with that.
Oh, size of a penis is not linked to the size of the man. (how tall he is/ muscular) For example, a silverback gorilla (yeah, yeah, don't hate me) is around six foot five tall on his hind legs, and weighs 400 pounds. His manhood however, you can't see it, it's so small, one to two inches.(!) And it doesn't have to be big, to do the job, which is making babies, right.
Natural Geographic and Animal Planet, seen some documentaries while zapping, waiting for my favourite program to start.
Also, in fanfiction stories, the men are often described as 'big' and/ or thick ('hung'), because that's seen as the most erotic or something. (What a load of crap! Pardon my swearing. Now, of course 'we' don't want him to be small, but what about just a normal size. Or don't mention size at all, even better.)
And the girl is often 'petite'/ small. Like there's at least a foot differance in height and she's half his weight. So cliché!
Well, that's off my chest. Now for some good stuff.
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After the wedding night on the island
While I'm waking up I think about last night. It was amazing! Edward took his time exploring my body. His touch was wonderful, made me aroused. The sweet words he whispered to me made me relax. I felt beautiful. *Sigh*
He might be a virgin, but he has picked many men's brains and that shows. When he entered me, there was a little sting, but after that, nothing but ecstasy. Oh wow, all I felt was how well he moved. His lips on mine, on my nipples. The moans and other noises we made. His hard body under my hands. I got multiple major orgasms before he had his.
That's why I couldn't understand him feeling bad, guilty. Yes, I had bruises and felt them too now, but during our love-making, other things surpassed that. Finally being with him, giving myself to him, that's what mattered. The wonderful, overwhelming feelings he evoked in me.
All I knew was how we fitted together perfectly. I've never experienced anything this amazing! And I told him so, tried to explain it as best I could. Most words were insufficient.
